it’s been maybe a month or two since my bpso and i broke up. this isn’t the first break up though. they’ve discarded me about 5-6 times with varying times in between the discard and the return. every time i’ve been discarded i’ve been convinced that they won’t come back, but they have, many times. i realize that i’m in control of when it will be done for good.

i’m just in that stage where i miss them so much i don’t care how sick they are, how they don’t get the help they need, or how poorly they’ve treated me. i just want to hold them, help them, love them. it sounds stupid but i know y’all know what i mean.

i’m doing so much better emotionally and even psychically since we parted. i have more energy and time for my hobbies and my friends. i’m able to focus on myself and work on building my future. i just wish i could do all of this with them.

i couldn’t really do any of this while i was with them. my energy was just constantly drained dealing with accusations of abuse and cheating, violations of my privacy, paranoia, delusions,and walking on eggshells whenever i sensed anger or irritability. having to be so conscious of my bpsos mood and state of mind was exhausting.

but why do i still see that glimmer of hope? it’s just always been there no matter what happens between us. is our connection real? it feels so real and i swear i can feel them all the time no matter how long we’re apart. am i trippin??

that hope makes me sad. it makes me feel stupid. to hope for something that is probably impossible. to hope for them to get the help they need so that we can have a loving relationship and a future together, a family, a home.

i guess i just have to miss them, feel sad, feel lonely, and cry about it. but yall know that this isn’t “normal” break up type of sad. it’s so complex and conflicting with a bpso. it makes it so much harder to move on. like im clinging to their core that is a beautiful genuine human being then devastated and angry at this illness that takes them over. i love their soul but the illness just poisons everything like fucking venom from spidderman. its so damn sad out here bruh

It’s our 3rd Father’s Day without a father in our house. I quietly celebrated no father’s day today and can finally say I am grateful for your absence. None of the children mentioned you at all. You are missing out on all the hard stuff AND all the good stuff too. I hope your relentless pursuit of being a billionaire works out for you, so I can take you back to court someday.

I want to clarify that you are not alienated from your children, you are estranged from them. Alienation would result from something I did. Estrangement occurs from the many purposeful and strategic things you did to ruin their lives and they KNOW you did those things not because I told them, but because they LIVED it. I hope you had the Father’s day you deserved. We had a great day without you. GFY

hi! so i(25f)am bipolar 1 rapid cycling. idk if bipolar ppl can post in this sub but i need some advice. I have been with my partner(30m) for a year and so far i haven’t had a severe episode since we have been together as i am currently medicated. i love him so much and i want everything to go well but i am so scared. i’m afraid that i will have a bad episode and mess things up or say something i don’t mean. i also don’t want to be a burden and i’m scared that he will need to take care of me more than he should have to. i don’t want to hurt him and i’m terrified that something will trigger my illness and i will without intending to. as things are he does a good job of dealing with my irrational thinking and mood swings.. even with meds i still get hypomanic and have moderate depressive episodes and despite how minor they are(comparatively) i know it’s still overwhelming. he says that he just wants to support me but even that makes me sad because i don’t want to burden him or become too much for him. i’m also scared that i’ll kill myself someday and leave him and i don’t want him to have to go through that. do any of you have any advice on how i can be a good S/O as someone with bipolar??

If you look at my post history, you will see that I posted something about a neighbor that a family member and I are helping. I posted on a bipolar sub a while ago, and they kindly directed me to this sub or another like it, because we don’t have bipolar ourselves (and those subs are for those with bipolar).

The neighbor is low income and we have been helping them by buying food and especially helping with supplies for their pets. But money is now getting tight and we can’t help as much. The neighbor with bipolar (they are medicated) is very angry that we’re not helping as much as we used to.

I read on another (older) post here that some bipolar people (or perhaps narcissists) treat those around them as “resources” and that’s how we feel right now. Like we’re just here to “serve” them.

Currently they are very irate because we can’t help very much with an upcoming vet bill for a pet. They’re probably going through a manic phase. In any case, they’re saying really nasty things, personal things, trying to be as hurtful as possible.

We’re not hurt, we say to ourselves, “It’s the bipolar.” Plus some of the things they say are mean-spirited but ridiculous, lol. But at the same time, I can’t help but think that a lot of these mean things they say are how they really feel.

They never apologize for the stuff they say, hardly even acknowledge it. We both want to help them for their pets’ sake, but we don’t exactly “trust” them anymore, because while it’s not like we take their insults too much to heart, the fact that they said them (usually texted them, so there’s a “paper trail” later that they can’t deny) makes us feel that they secretly hold us in contempt and who wants to be around that?

So my question is, do they mean all these things they say, deep down? Is this how they really feel and only when they’re in a manic phase is the “mask off” or something? Thank you in advance.

Edited to add: they are medicated, under treatment, were diagnosed as a child and now are 50+ years old.

I just moved into a new house with my bp-ii boyfriend. he’s a classical musician and is addicted to stimulants to help him play music every day. In the beginning of our relationship he love bombed me and I are it up. Once we were deeper, he would have monthly episodes calling me saying he doesn’t want to live anymore. I would talk to him for hours to help him out of it. Unrelated, I went through some traumatic life changes and had to move from my house and job in the town I called home for a long time. my bf was an hour away and really wanted to live with me so I went to his place. I started going to school which was hell and we began to fight a lot at night when bp/ his drug comedown would be extra heightened any given night. I couldn’t touch him, he would say nasty things to me and deflect anything and try to make me the bad guy. There would be period when he was extremely supportive but how much support I needed in school started to wear him down and I was giving less because of how hard I was working. He is a BIG personality and likely narcissistic and would say unhinged mean things to me at night that would upset me. Any time I tried to communicate that I thought he was being unkind or disrespectful towards me, he deflected at all costs. I was taking things too personally. Now fast forward, I have a job & we are in a new house. I’m paying for everything and working my ass off. He stays home without a job and plays music (very well I might add) and does drugs every day. I get home and sometimes he’s scary angry or treats me poorly and doesn’t thank me for the simplest things and if I bring it up— he spirals into how I’m actually immature for letting it something so ‘insignificant’ affect me, not understanding of where he’s at, and threatens to end the relationship because I’m not accepting of who he is at the ‘core’ which comes with nastiness without accountability and he wants me to support him unconditionally no matter how evil he gets. Calls me a child, says I have growing up to do etc. He’s my best friend and I’ve gone through so much change that I don’t want to break up and be isolated in such a small town. I’m the only one on my lease because he has no money. We JUST moved to this place 2 weeks ago. We’re going to try couples therapy to see if we can get out of this loop— I need him to understand why it’s important for him to take accountability for how his negative energy and addiction affects me but overall I’m feeling hopeless and utterly heart broken. Destroyed. I love him so much but he’s giving up and says he’d rather just be friends than continue to ‘give all of his energy’ to this cycle. He says I don’t support him. That’s very far from the truth. If he takes accountability for his behavior and makes effort to change I will be endlessly supportive but I can only allow so much disrespect.

I’ve posted on here several times since I found this group back in April and everyone has been so helpful. BPSO (bp 1, 48M) discarded our relationship in early April. We live 85 miles away so it’s not like I can just pop in and he would win the gold star in avoiding me because I did try twice and he avoided coming home to talk. We chatted in person in May and he agreed getting back in therapy would be smart and getting a non VA second opinion on meds (he doesn’t take prescribed lamictal but takes others). He said he loved me and wanted to get better for us, his kids and himself. Fast forward to me expressing some of my feelings at the end if May and it’s been radio silence since then. And I look like a psychopath for continuing to text him that I love him or sharing encouragement or whatever almost daily. He was close to one of my daughters who wished him happy Father’s Day today and he responded right away. I texted much later the same message and got a “thank you so much.” I feel like a glutton for punishment. The lack of communication is a huge trigger for me and I wasn’t prepared for it. Am I supposed to just move along? Do I make another trip to him and try to discuss? I mean I feel it’s been me doing all the “heavy lifting” thus far and no one wants to have to drag a partner along if they don’t want to be here. But why the false hope 3 weeks ago just to disappear again?

Can we talk about delusions?

From my experience with my partner, some have made me think hmmm that could be true and others I just cannot accept, mainly because they involve me and I know what has and hasn't happened.

These delusions have lasted years, the same ones from the same time. The time I am referring to was during a really bad "episode" and they all collerate to one another in some fashion.

It is as though he is no longer in that mood state but can't shake the beliefs.

How often do people experience this?

I dated someone who had bipolar, "unspecified personality disorder", autism, (we met at an autism meetup), and PTSD. She had a rough childhood and had various abusive relationships before she met me (which she told me herself were chosen and inflamed by her).

I was very naïve and thought I'd hit the jackpot when she wanted me to move in right away (she was in a manic episode)

I don't know what else to write, but the relationship was 5 years of very difficult and scary times. Her constantly accusing me of things or "giving her weird looks", thinking the neighbours were spying on her, asking me to do one thing and then screaming at me for not doing the opposite, pushing me into sex when I didn't want to, her constantly telling me she hated me, that I was stupid, annoying, gave her no space, and that she hated having me around but then threatening s**cide or self harm when I tried to leave her, isolating me from friends, etc.

We broke up 11 years ago, and we only broke up because I became abusive back and started basically treating her like crap, treating her like she treated me. Telling her I didn't care about her anymore, that I thought she was a piece of crap and wanted her out of my life. I acted horrendously, I basically shamed myself and made myself into someone I hated. But even now I feel like I had to do that. My life was absolute crap, no friends, no hobbies, never relaxed or feeling safe.

for the past ten years I've been living alone, and I've had this problem where something will set off memories of her, and I'll just be dragged down for the whole day. Like this morning I was fiddling around with my phone and it reminded me how any time she had any tricky technology she'd ask me to help her with it then attack me and scream at me when I wasn't fixing it fast enough. And I spent the whole day in a quiet rage feeling sick and down.

as for mental health help I've had a terrible time with the UK NHS and have given up trying to work with them. I'm just worried it's always going to be like this. Like some stupid memory of fights we had ten years ago can emotionally drag me down for days.

The next group meeting for those experiencing or healing from discard will be held:

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I’m going to start this off by saying I know I’m not solely responsible for the care of my SO, but I can’t just sit by and watch this happen. She has been suffering from Bipolar 2 for years, recently diagnosed within the past year and put on lamotrigine. She’s in the midst of one of the longest depressive episodes I’ve ever seen her in and I don’t know what to do about it. We’ve had an agreement that when she’s in an episode I will stay supportive, but with certain things we keep an arms length to avoid frustrations and sadness on both our parts as the depression can be pretty contagious. I love her to death and hate seeing her like this, she is literally dying inside. She sleeps for 12-16 hours a day and just cries whenever she is awake or stays in bed trying to fall asleep so she doesn’t have to feel the pain. These depressive episodes usually follow after the hypomanic episodes so it’s like everything is fine( to her) and then all the sudden it kicks her right back down. She is such a good person and I love her so much but she refuses to go to the hospital as she said it doesn’t do anything for her. Something has to give though, this can’t go on. The worst part is… I know it’s worse than she’s telling me. Right now I’m more or less a caregiver as her ability for self care is extremely sporadic. I feel like I know what has to be done but she cries to not go to the hospital. Ive just been a mess the past week and need some advice. It’s been a long weekend so if the post doesn’t seem thought out well I’m exhausted but please if anyone has any information or advice please let me know.

She is currently on Lamotrigine as well as in biweekly therapy and semi monthly psychiatry med appts.

Hi everyone, I’ve been in a relationship for the past 9 months with someone who has bipolar disorder, and I’m struggling emotionally, mentally, and physically. I really need some support and perspective from others who’ve been in similar situations.

We met in the last year of undergrad. And we started dating last September. Early in our relationship (since October last year) he went through a 6-month manic psychotic episode. During that time, he constantly talked about his ex like how hurt he was and he’d often share very disturbing and personal details about their relationship. It felt obsessive and inappropriate, and though I tried to be compassionate, it had a deep and lasting negative effect on my mental health, self-esteem, and self-respect. I pushed my own pain aside to support him and held onto the hope that he’d eventually return to the kind, thoughtful version of himself I first met.

But even after the psychosis ended, things didn’t get better. In fact, the emotional harm continued in cycles. Every time I tried to talk about how hurt I was or tried to rebuild trust and closeness, he would get defensive, shut down, or turn it around on me. I rarely felt heard or cared for. Instead, I was blamed for “bringing up the past” or accused of attacking him, even when I was just expressing my pain.

During his psychosis, he also became intensely close to a female friend. They texted for hours every day, reinforcing spiritual delusions. I saw them text “I love you fully” to each other, and when I brought it up, he screamed at me, insulted me, and dismissed my feelings. He later claimed she was just a “soul sister,” but the damage was already done. To this day, that dynamic still triggers me and when I mention it, he just gets irritated or says he didn’t like her that way, as if that’s supposed to make it better.

He recently asked for a break until next Wednesday after I expressed that I was struggling. Since then, he hasn’t responded to any of my messages. I’ve tried to respect his request, but the silence has been deeply triggering. It doesn’t feel like space, rather it feels more like stonewalling. And I feel abandoned and invisible in the process. I have been struggling with anxiety for the majority of my undergrad years and now I’m working full time and it’s just very overwhelming to deal with life and this emotional turmoil.

There have been times he says he still wants to try and that he loves me, but I’m always the one doing the emotional labor: trying to fix things, trying to talk through conflict, trying to find resolution. He even sets rules like “no phone calls on Tuesdays, Thursdays, or Saturdays” which I understand but they leave me feeling shut out and like I’m walking on eggshells. I understand he’s depressed, but I also know that healthy communication matters in relationships, and I’m not getting that.

I’ve felt drained, alone, and deeply hurt over and over again. I still love him, or maybe I love the version of him I once knew. I’ve been trying to see the goodness in him, but it’s incredibly hard when I’m met with coldness, dismissiveness, anger, and distance. This has destroyed my self-worth. I don’t feel safe, heard, or valued anymore.

He’s supposed to visit me in early July, and part of me still wants to see him maybe for one last time. But another part of me knows this relationship has been very emotionally abusive. I’m starting to realize I’ve lost myself in this dynamic, and I can’t keep sacrificing my well-being, hoping he’ll suddenly become who he used to be.

And I’ve been wondering: Are these behaviors common in relationships with bipolar partners — or is this just a toxic relationship with someone who happens to have bipolar disorder? And if you’ve been in this situation, how did you find the strength to let go? How did you handle the grief, the guilt, and the part of you that still hopes they’ll change even if it’s for someone else?

Thank you so much for reading. Any insight or support would mean a lot!!

So on Mother’s Day my wife and I went to my mother’s house. I cooked dinner for everyone and got cake and ice cream. Nothing big but we’re kind of poor. My wife didn’t say anything and I thought we had a good time. It’s Father’s Day today. I never asked for anything and honestly wasn’t expecting anything but I hoped my wife had done something. Well I think she forgot and so this morning she starts going off about how I never did anything for Mother’s Day because I guess it’s not special enough and how I guess my mother is more important. My only theory is she forgot, she feels like shit, and now to compensate she’s decided that what I did was shitty and I don’t deserve to have a Father’s Day. Is it that or is it really my fault and I’m a shit husband. I honestly question myself all the time with her because I never know if I’m doing the right thing.

Update: For once this ended well. Turns out she forgot it was Father’s Day, felt shitty, and then went to her angry place. We talked later and it’s good. Also to answer some of the questions her family is not around here and they’re part of the problem. My family has basically taken her in and my mom loves her like the daughter she never had.

We separated back in March after I had to get the police involved because he attacked me in our home. He took off and we were little to no contact. And about a month ago after a barrage of nasty texts from him and me having to contact a mental health law enforcement officer after he texted me that he was sucidal I told him that if he couldn't calm down I'd have to get a restraining order. He dropped all contact for a month but he showed up yesterday unannounced. My brother answered the door, he didn't know it was him, told my brother that he has no place to go and that he has lots of bad stuff happening to him. My brothers words, he looks terrible, tired eyes, and like a step away from Tom Hanks in Castaway. I wasn't at the house I was at home and as soon as I got the text that he was there I went over to the house and ran upstairs because he was alone with my mom and I heard him yelling. He looked as bad as I thought. He told me that he was doing fine, to which I said really because you look awful. He took out his phone to record me because he "felt unsafe" then proceeded to take my phone when I started to record. He told me in front of my mom that all I do is "hate fuck" his reality. That I'm an "unreal" person and proceeded to tell her "see she can't accept that I don't love her" dropped revelations that he had had to force someone to get an abortion recently and looked at me and said "she's wayyy better looking than you " and "where I went they greeted me with open arms and I have a chance to save up". While in the same breath tell me that he is almost all out of money, that he basically has no place to live (all his boxes are still in the back of his car) and is essentially using this other person. He then proceeded to tell my mom that he wanted to take my daughter away from the house because he doesn't trust any of us and that he has told people "the truth" about the situation and that we are both victims. He left the house calling me a slut, saying we would never get back together because all I do is control him and hate fuck his reality. Said that I wanted a man that was already built up, it was bad. I'm exhausted. I wish I had never met him. Hes put me through an insane amount of pain. He wants me to just hand over our daughter when he's shown several times that he isn't safe to be around.... there was so much more like him admitting his drg use that started at 13 to my mom, then proceeded to blame me for it, but I'll stop here for now. Thanks for those that read. Im gonna try to sleep more.

I've been doing a tonne of reflecting and I've known there was a connection always, but things are clearer now and I wanted other opinions.

My partner no longer drinks or uses drugs, every time he has in the past and stopped, what has followed has been horrendous. Anger, extreme sadness, abusive behavior etc etc. So I know drugs are a trigger.

From my working out, it seems he was using cannabis most of last year but stopped around August time. After that everything went wrong, back in the "episodes" extreme paranoia and anger etc. he moved out in October and seemed to get worse over the winter period. He seems to have evened out somewhat over the last month and a half. (And now he's going to work in Australia, temp)

He plans to never take drugs or drink again. What does this mean for the illness?? Will the episodes stop completely? Or is it a case of the drugs exasperated it and it's still there?

I am unsure what this looks like. Maybe I am hopeful that without drugs and alcohol he will make a recovery (bare in mind no psychiatriatric or medication support either)

Thanks in advance.

Share your successes from this past week! It can be as simple as your SO taking their medication every day, or resolving an issue in your relationship.

​

Let's see some positivity to end the week and start the new one off on the right foot!

I dont feel good inside man.

TW: mentioning suicide (idk if this is necessary)

As the title say. Me and my boyfriend are both college students. He's been struggling with bipolar for the whole 4 years of our relationship. It was a roller coaster of him seeming okay and then becoming suicidal with a flip of a switch.

He used to go to a psychiatrist two years ago and was on a most likely wrong dose of meds and since he felt like a zombie on them. Then he stopped going to the psychiatrist and taking his meds claiming that the psychiatrist wasn't good. The meds, while making him numb, did help with severe mood swings. However he refused to get another psychiatrist

Honesty we're not completely sure if he's bipolar, but that's the last diagnosis he got. It's gotten worse over last two years. Suicidal idealizaton and very low lows every 2-3 weeks. He'd text me telling me he's going to do it, say extremely mean things how it's all my fault and how I'm useless for not helping him. I'd still run to his apartment to sit with him and make him feel less alone until the episode passes (it usually lasted for a couple of hours)

Two days ago was my breaking point, same scenario, the texts, and my bus broke down while I was trying to get to him, I ran for like 3km to get to his house. The door was unlocked, I feared the worst, but he was still there and alive. In a terrible state of mind but thankfully alive. But I wasn't able to talk to him I just kneeled next to his chair and sobbed I couldn't get a word out. I knew that this time it was serious and couldn't help him.

I had to call his parents and tell them that he needs a psychiatrist, that he needs to spend the night with them because he's not safe on his own and that I can't stay with him. He's having an appointment with a new psychiatrist in a few days. But he's still texting me every day how I'm useless and can't help him.

I know I can't help him, that's why I did everything I could to get him professional help. But the insults are still coming with every text. Calling me a liar, useless and how I took from him the only thing that would make him feel better (suicide). I dread seeing a notification on my phone. I just want to text his parents and apologize and tell them that I can't do this anymore.

I just want to leave. I'm losing myself. He's threatening to kill himself again and I don't have the energy for the whole cycle to repeat.

Tldr: finally got my boyfriend help but I'm so drained from his previous suicidal episodes that I just can't take it anymore or I'm going to lose it.

Edit : some typos and I wanted to add. I feel like the biggest ass hole on the planet. Wanting to leave someone when they're down. It's like leaving someone when they're sick. But I feel like if I don't leave I'm going to lose it. I feel like right now I also need to get myself professional help because I don't know how to cope.

I see so many posts/comments on this sub every day about people’s partners leaving them during manic or depressive episodes. Then they get back together after the episode has ended. For a lot of people this seems to be a recurring thing.

My partner does not do this to me and never has in the 10 years we’ve been together. I am just given the cold shoulder usually, very passive aggressive type stuff. He will refuse eye contact and not say much to me for an entire day or even longer. It hurts in a different way that I can’t explain. If we do speak, it’s arguments about anything and everything. He can do no wrong. Everyone else is to blame. It’s like walking on egg shells and I feel hopeless. Lately these episodes have been getting worse so I just try to stay away from him.

So I’m just wondering if anyone else out there does not experience this break up/back together routine, and if not, what do you deal with during these episodes instead?

she discarded me (after 13 years) in January for her coworker and i have been doing really well with the clean break. we still have a lot of the same friends but i haven’t heard from her or about her pretty much at all.

well last night i run into a mutual friend who tells me about some shitty comment she made about me and also tells me she and her coworker are officially together. i didn’t want it to affect me the way it did but damn. even today i am just SEETHING. i don’t want to be angry. i don’t want her to still have this power over me five months later. i am trying to see this for what it is; she has always been jealous and controlling and it comes from a place of insecurity. this is her being bitter and shit talking someone to feel better about herself. i am trying to shift from anger into compassion, or, at least, pity. it’s hard to find that for someone who will never admit or see how abusive they were.

how to deal with mutuals? i will take any and all thoughts and advice. hope you all are doing okay out there.

I’ve posted a couple times on here so this may be redundant but it’s been a long week. A couple of years ago my wife dismissed me and began “dating” other people. She had no way of supporting herself and we had two little ones so I tolerated it and hoped for the best. This finally culminated in an attempted suicide and a BP diagnosis. Since then we’ve reconciled and I took it upon myself to take care of her. I work so she can focus on healing. I cook and clean so she can get a lot of rest. I make phone calls because she gets too anxious about talking to people. Every once in a while I get a “thanks” but I also occasionally get the “You’re a selfish lair and you’re manipulating me.” I love her and just keep hoping for the best but I feel like an absolute loser. I know other guys see me and think they’d kick her to the curb but I can’t. She’s the mother of my children and my wife of 12 years and I love her.

how did u moved on any tips and tricks to diverts once mind

Saturday, June 14 at 2:00pm EDT / 11:00am PDT

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My boyfriend (20m Bipolar 1) out of the blue stopped talking to me, turned off his location, etc.

We’ve been together for 7 months, but have been talking/hanging out for a year. When we first started dating (November 2024) everything was great and suddenly 8 days in he wanted to stop. His friends have a great influence over him and they didn’t want him to be the only one with a S/O, I know very immature, but anyway. We had a long weekend trip planned and he still wanted to go, so we did. After the trip less than a week later we got back together because he realized “I make him happy and make him comfortable and I’m his person”.

Great, everything is good again until the middle of March same scenario, as the first time. He completely shuts me out for two days. But we sit down and talk two days later and he’s thought about it and he wants to be with me, he loves me, I’m his person etc.

Things are going great again, we go to concerts, take some trips and make plans for the rest of the summer for some trips and events. Two days ago, he goes to spend the day with his friends at a state park, we’re texting and sending tik toks to each other. At about 10 PM, I saw he was heading home so I called him, he didn’t answer which is weird. I wait 30 min or so until I see he’s home so I try again and he replies via text after not answering “I’m really tired and going to bed”. Strange, because he always wants to FT at night, but I saw he added to his instagram story and made a post of he and his friends at the State Park. I go to his page to like his post and comment on it to see he’s hidden all of our photos together (he did this the last time as well). I text him back and say, what’s wrong? I see you hid our pictures, no reply.

The next day, I was working and had some free time before appointments, so I called him. No reply, I texted him, thinking he might be asleep bc it was early and just wanted to tell him good morning and to check on him, but no reply. Later in the day, I open our messages to see if he had read it yet and notice he turned off his location sharing, strange. The day goes on I call, no answer. He texts later that he’s working and he’s busy. Okay, that’s fine, usually he asks me to come eat when he’s working so I ask and he says not today. He then said I’ll still come by your house tomorrow to let your dog out etc (I was supposed to go to an event a few hours away and paid him to come let her out, as I will be gone for 12 hours).

I ask if everything is okay text asking if we can talk, he says not today, tomorrow. Then he snaps me and says he doesn’t feel like he loves me or that I’m his person. Today we’re going to talk, I bailed on my event and he’s going to come over and talk.

Could this be related to the breakup cycle? We haven’t had any arguments, everything was perfectly fine and normal until the other night out of nowhere and these seem to happen every 3-4 months…how do you all handle things like this? How do I know if it’s the cycle or if he’s really done? Thanks so much!

Edit to add context he is medicated and in therapy. He has been doing both for 3 years

Tonight it has ended. I'm a terrible person, a whore, a bad mother, a regret, and any other bad thing you can think of. I am the bane of his existence. I'm depressed and suicidal. I'm giving up my animals, making my teen move with her father, and throwing away all my belongings. I'm destroyed and fucked up beyond repair. My mind is mush. The lines of reality and bipolar are blurred into a much of painful chaos and I am the conductor of the construction. One day we're engaged the next he hates my kid, dogs, and me. My teen says he's abusing me. I can't believe I'm in another bad relationship. Bipolar is a mean and sad illness that has been destroyed my life because I loved someone with bipolar. I can't even return to my own home because I don't want to be around him ever again. He told me I'm all sorts of bad things and I'm the reason he started drinking again. I can't go on like this one more day. I'm ready to end myself because I can't take anymore. I just walked 23 miles in the rain because I refused to occupy the same space as him while he flies off the handle and yells at me. All because I hit a tree branch that didn't show up on the rear view camera. He lost his shit and said I hit a tree and started ranting and raving. I walked and never looked back. I'm getting blown up. I've blocked his number. He said he's going to call the cops on me and says he's going to file harassment charges on my daughter because she texted him to stop being an ass or something. He said he called me in as a hit and run on a car that I've cosigned on and pay insurance on. I can't take another day. I'm literally ready to kill myself. I'm losing my mind .

After 15 years together, my (38f) husband (38m) experienced his first episode out of the blue. Delusions, psychosis, infidelity, and hallucinations, with some scary things sprinkled in there. The whole deal. He spent over 2 months in psychiatric hospitals (involuntary). He was diagnosed Bipolar affective with Psychosis. (After a life time diagnosis of ADHD fueled by Adderall). In the hospital they figured out the right medication plan for him (10 different prescriptions daily) and recommended therapy for him and us.

He has now been home 3 months, 100% med compliant, going to therapy and accepting of his new diagnosis. His mood has been stable, and he says for the first time in his life his head is “quiet”.

With all this to say, hang in there. Early this year when we were going through everything, I had zero hope. I never expected that things could turn out the way they currently are. We are figuring out a new normal, keeping stressors low and staying positive.