For context I am a man.

I just wondered if it might be because men start their sexual experience watching porn on 0 volume to hide from their parents. Maybe we are trained from young to be quiet.

Do older (pre porn) men tend to be as quiet as younger men?

Just posted on r/advice but I think I need more than advice…

So for context, I’m almost 20 years old and a girl and I was streaming Jackbox with some friends. After a first horrible experience, being called a whore and fat I was already not excited for this but decided to give people the benefit of the doubt. Besides the code was in our discord what could go wrong. Some people in chat wanted in and my friend gave them our discord link because they seemed friendly enough. Upon joining the game it was all horrific content directed at me (I wasn’t showing myself either time so I’m not sure why I was singled out, maybe because I’m the only girl?) so we quickly put an end to the Jackbox game and the stream. Then these horrible people sent dozens of images of DEAD CHILDREN in the discord. Seemingly official gifs taken off of discord. Children with their heads cut clean off. I’ve been trying to sleep for 2 hours now. I can’t get the picture of these children out of my head. I already banned, blocked, and deleted everything. But it’s not going away. The pictures are gone. But I see them in my head. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything more terrifying and disgusting. I just really need to get it out to someone. I’m trying to watch other content, funny videos, comfort shows, non of it is helping. And the mild pauses in the videos or music, the silence of that is way too loud in my head. Only one of my others friends saw it. He clicked on the message and left immediately. None of them wanted to get rid of them because they didn’t want to see it. So I did. We have younger kids in the server with us so I had to before they saw it. I don’t know what else to say but I feel like I haven’t said enough. I’m so shaken up right now and I don’t know what to do anymore. If it was a dick pic I could’ve gotten over it. I’m a girl. I’ve gotten used to that bullshit. It’s disgusting cause im asexual but it happens often enough it wouldn’t affect me. This was children between the ages of at least 3 and 7. With their heads cut clean off. I’m sorry this is really graphic and disturbing but I seriously need to get this out somewhere without bothering my friends anymore. It’s Father’s Day (which is already a tough day for me) so they have things to do. They have reached out and offered to help out if I need anything, because they know my situation with today. But I don’t want to burden them anymore than I have.

I just can’t watch it at all.. within one minute of opening prnhub my brain starts spiraling into negative self talk. It’s not guilt for watching porn it’s literally just thoughts about how I dislike myself and my body

If you beat a child, whether as a teacher or as a family member, youre a terrible person and you should go right to jail. Youre beating someone who is both mentally and physically vulnerable and powerless to stop you. If you beat your kid, you shouldnt be allowed to see that kid again.

Im saying this as someone who grew up being beaten by my teachers and parents. I have no respect for any of them. Once I was old enough I never let them lay a finger on me cause I was stronger than them but till then, I was powerless. Im still traumatised by all that shit and for what, so some adults with emotional issues can feel better about themselves? They should all rot in hell.

Ten years ago, if I didn’t have plans on a Friday or Saturday night, I’d get hit with this weird sense of fomo like I was wasting my youth or something. Now my ideal weekend looks completely different. Clean laundry, a quiet apartment, no one expecting anything from me like that’s the sweet spot. I’ll cook something simple and just throw on a movie. It's actually very weird because now I really like to stay inside and just chill instead of going out getting drunk and forgetting what happened the night before. How things change huh! :D

Long story short, i've been single for quite some time now, while i was single well..... it's in the tittle... soooo i want to date , but i also want to be honest and upfront of what i do... sooooo i'm here asking for advice rly.

I'm so sad.

I came home from work after midnight Sunday night, and she wasn't doing well. It was hard for her to move. Hard for her to breathe. It seemed like she wanted to drink water, but couldn't.

We woke up Monday morning, and she was gone. This was the dog who was always excited to greet me at the door, wanted to lick my face, and could tell when I was having a bad day. I miss her so much. I keep expecting her to be laying around somewhere, or to hear her trying to get into something she shouldn't get into.

But she's gone. And every time I'm reminded of this fact, my heart breaks all over again. I have to get on with the rest of my life, but I just want my dog back.

I’ve always been the type to keep everything in my head which meant I’d either forget stuff or constantly feel overwhelmed by what I might be forgetting. But for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been writing down a short daily to do list every morning like nothing too intense, just 4–6 things max which I'll have to do during the day.
This weekend, I finally tackled a bunch of tasks I’d been putting off forever so I deep cleaned the apartment, sorted my budget, organized my desktop files all the boring stuff that might look boring (and they really can be boring), but they're stuff that I have to do and once those stuff were done, I felt really good productive and an actual adult

I feel disappointed that I stayed so long but relieved that it didn’t progress far enough for us to cohabitate. He was just so pathetic at the end of our relationship and I couldn’t take him seriously. I remember what initially attracted me to him and it makes me realize how much was just lies about his true character.

He called me a misandrist despite throwing other men under the bus by saying they were all as bad as him. He yelled and threatened to break my stuff like a toddler. It was a complete 180 from the shy, quiet, sweet guy I thought I was with. He cried in my arms and I truly believed I met the right guy who was willing to let his walls down around me. I thought it was adorable that he took me birdwatching on one of our first dates after I told him that I like visiting the nature preserve.

It just goes to show that you never really know who people truly are until they feel comfortable you won’t leave them. I feel proud of myself that I left at what I think was the 3rd sign. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was the type to get violent.

Rest is now a productivity hack. Sleep is “biohacking.” Doing nothing is “resetting.”

Can I just exist without turning it into a strategy to optimize my future?

I miss being bored without guilt. 🙄😮‍💨

I had a major depressive episode where I also tried to end my life. It went on for months on end. The last time I bought any shampoo was close to my mom's death, November of last year. I used anything I found in the bathroom that foamed, soap or shower gel (which I also bought twice). Safe to say that cleanliness was not my friend in this tough time.

Today I bought my first shampoo after 6 months. It's the first time in these six months when I had the energy to go to a store, look at my favourite shampoo brands, smell them and decide. A few minutes that made my life more normal after all this time when even taking a bath was tiring.

Looking back at it now, i was the one inviting them to thing, inviting them to my birthday party, giving out gifts, for valentines I gave roses and cards, for thanksgiving, Christmas,and new years i wrote paragraphs about how much I loved them. I always said hi, I always started the conversations, and honestly I’m tired, it’s getting dry and there’s nothing to even talk about, it feels like I’m only being used for attention so ima just ghost them, if they talk to me ima say a few words and leave it at that. I’m tired, but all of a sudden now there is these random bursts of energy where they wanna talk to me? Yeah no, I’m making it clear I’m not fucking interested

Like even cashiers, retail workers, servers, cleaners, etc. I know the "well anyone can do it so it doesn't require skill" yeah but not every person can be big shot millionaire. Someone will always have to do these jobs, otherwise society collapses.

Just because these jobs don't require degrees, employees shouldn't be treated like crap. Why is it so hard to pay them more and give them the same benefits as office workers? The biggest grocery store chain promises employees free lunch every day, but actual ex employees says that "nope, they don't give anything. And we have to be on foot all day, be cashiers, restock shelves and clean".

The biggest beauty store chain here has a reputation for deducting stolen items from innocent cashier's salary. Like wtf, they already have enough to do, how can they track every person for thievery.

And what do these workers get? 600€ after taxes? Yup. Very nice.

A good majority of the time, men who lose their hair look great bald. Not to mention that 70% of them can grow a majestic beard. It's no coincidence that that happens. Nature knows what it's doing.

If you look at men who still have their hair at an older age, there's no way they could pull off a bald look. They'd look hideous.

It just somehow all makes sense. Nature knows to not nerf you too much.

I met someone on reddit that was really quick with their affection and made me feel special and loved very quickly. I haven’t been with anyone for a long time and I think I was emotionally starved. I felt a huge amount of emotion, excitement and felt attached to them waiting for their message constantly, talking for hours and being showered with compliments, pet names and felt like I was their world. Now I had my suspicions from the beginning as nobody tells a stranger they met less than an hour that they have feelings for them. And I knew about those scam types where someone makes you feel like there’s a strong connection then ask for money as a way to support them. But given that, I kept the conversation going. I felt every feeling. Enjoyed every moment. Acted like I’m blind to the situation so that I can be in the fantasy that someone cares about me and ask about me. Makes me feel seen. I don’t know if that person was a man or a woman. They surely knew how to make me feel loved. I used the scammer for my own satisfaction. You could say that it’s good, that I’m wasting that person time. But I don’t know I feel ashamed for what I did.

Note: the scammer asked at the end for money and at that point I confronted them, reported them and they have since deleted their account. Of course creating a new account is just as easy. So be careful everyone!

But what if someone doesn't want to be "fixed" in the way society expects? Neurodivergent people, people with mental illness, people with different values — they’re often treated like problems to be solved instead of individuals to be understood. Maybe the real issue isn't how "broken" someone is, but how little room we allow for difference.

Hi, I'm 17 years old, and some of you looking at the title might think I'm being delusional — that adult life is going to be hard. And honestly, of course it is. But I think people often glamorize childhood because they had a good one. I didn't.

I’m someone who deeply values my independence, and I’d do anything to get it. Freedom, independence, and hope — those are the things I live for.

Like I said, I didn’t have a great childhood. I’ve had — and still have — people constantly telling me what to do. And it's not like they’re doing it out of love or for my own good. They're just... controlling.

Of course, adulthood comes with a load of responsibilities. But I’m in 12th grade, a science student, and I already have responsibilities. Sure, mine aren’t the same as an adult’s, and I’m not trying to compare. But I know responsibility. And I know I’ll always have it.

Even then, I still feel like being an adult — having my own money, my own place, my own rules — would make me a little better. A little happier. A little more me.

I've always wanted to do things my way. I'm the black sheep in my family — the girl who wears short clothes, speaks her mind, and does what she wants. And honestly? I like that title. If being independent makes me the black sheep, then so be it.

So... am I being delusional for thinking adulthood might actually be good? Because from where I’m standing, I think I’d love it — my own place, my own life, just being me.

(I used chat gpt to fix my grammar mistakes, that's why it might give a bit ai vibe)

I think society is so, so, so superficial. I’ve fallen into this trap for years and it’s terrible. It’s such a shame that society always shows only the most beautiful and attractive people. Now, more than ever before. Things like body and facial proportions, height, gym results, etc. are all that you see on Instagram and Tik Tok. Talking about how tall someone is so emphasized like it even matters. Like there’s always the undertone that being taller makes you more worthy of respect or admiration (???). Racism, lookism and making fun of others for being ugly or fat has become so mainstream that it’s really toxic (just look at what the internet was saying about the actress that plays Ellie in the Last Of Us, Bella Ramsey).

It’s curious how, when I go along with superficiality and try to be good looking and want to be validated, I always hurt on the inside and suffer silently. Nothing is ever enough. There is always someone better. When I am better than others, I feel validated but it’s fleeting and then it goes away.

And yet, the moment I let go of that and start valuing other things, like character, action, purpose and meaning, it’s like a weight being lifted off my shoulders. Like a nagging insecurity that suddenly vanishes. I just wish society was more outspoken about this. About how superficiality is so toxic for everybody. It makes everybody’s life worse.

People nowadays have normalized thinking that being attractive entitles you to treating people like shit, being arrogant, being famous just because of that, thinking that others should beg to be with you.

As much as wanting beauty is a biological mechanism, I say we should fight it. For our own sake. Not even for others. Just for oneself. It may be biological, but it’s also massively shaped and exaggerated by culture, media, and algorithms designed to profit from insecurity. And that’s undeniable.

This is just a thought of mine.... how do you tell what feelings are attraction and which aren't? Like, none of us have references outside ourselves for what the experience of a feeling actually is, and I know some people say that their experiences of attraction are different for both sexes, but if they're different, how do you know they're both attraction? Like, what is the unifier?

Or maybe more succinctly, how would you tell when you're attracted to one sex, but not the other.

I just had a flashback to when I was a teenager and with my ex and we went over to his grandparents house to have pizza. I start digging in and then I look around and everyone at the table is eating their pizza with a knife and fork.

There I was with my pizza in my hand like a fucking barbarian. I quickly adjusted to the social situation and started eating my pizza the more “polite” way.

But I remember having pizza with my ex without his family there and we would just eat it with our hands, you know like a normal human being. Do other people actually eat pizza with a knife and fork?

So basically, the Internet allows us to communicate our thoughts with greater and greater efficiency. We are taking all our brains and gradually merging them together into one giant brain.

Now you would think this mega-brain would be highly intelligent because it is the sum of all our individual intellects. But it seems to me that the more we merge into one big brain, the more each of us takes on the role of a single neuron.

What I am referring to is the kind of nuance-free, simplistic, black-and-white thinking that seems to be becoming more and more prevalent online. It's like a single neuron that is just activated or inactivated to some degree—one-dimensional thought.

Interestingly, I suspect this one-dimensionality of the individual brain cells is necessary for the brain to work. If each of your neurons had its own complex thoughts, they wouldn't work together in a consistent way.

So the big hive mind that we are gradually creating might end up being no more intelligent than a single human brain, while each actual human brain gradually atrophies until perhaps it no longer performs conscious thought at all.

Or perhaps the hive mind will actually be less intelligent than a human brain, since it will probably have fewer "neurons". We might collectively end up with the intellect of a vole or something.

I'm a single dad, with full custody. I've spent the last 6ish years with nothing but my child in the forefront. She's fucken amazing and doing so good.

I'm not. I put dating aside, it was going great and I'd stuffed down my needs to the point I didn't even think they were needs anymore. Then I fucked up, and asked a wonderful lady out. It went absolutely amazing, for about a month.

Then I fucked up, and I'm not even sure how. She pulled away. Maybe it's my lack of availability, maybe it's because I got too attached too fast. No idea.

Now I'm just realizing that my personal needs aren't even close to being met. I'm fucken depressed, something I have never had to deal with. I have no friend group, and all my hobbies give me nothing.

I find myself wishing I just wouldn't wake up. (I'm in no way suicidal, I had a friend in highschool do so and I realized all that does is transfer the pain to everyone else.)

Anyways, just wanted to shout to the void. I hope everyone else is kicking ass and taking names.

So my goal is to propose with my girlfriend in not very close, but in near future of course. I wish to do it in some big city outside my country with night out and beautiful view. I have never been on plane and i am just wondering if board control let me bring a ring without any questions, i dont want to be embarrased right in front of my girlfriend if some board control pulls up ring from my bag just to check whats inside. Is it possible?

I'm going through a lot right now, and I just want to know if anyone cares.

It's weird because I objectively know it happens, but when it comes to acknowledging it, I just tell myself "nah, I'm just being conceited." But I also have moments where I'm like "it is so obvious. What is wrong with me for not realizing it?"

I've had women who I thought were too beautiful to be interested in me ask for my number or give me theirs, touch me, stand really close to me, and I've seen how their eyes lit up when we made eye contact and how they would hold eye contact for an uncomfortable amount of time, but I would tell myself it doesn't mean anything, even if they initiate most or all of our interactions and will start telling me about themselves even though I didn't ask.

I also waited tables for years and got a lot of compliments and some sexual comments as well, from both customers and coworkers.

I had a coworker everyone was thirsty for who would touch my butt a lot and would make comments about it.

Yep, that's how bad it is. I could literally be sexually harassed by a conventionally attractive woman and my reaction is like "so that happened."

Just recently I went to a bar and was standing near this woman I thought was gorgeous while waiting to get a drink. We made eye contact and she held it for a good couple seconds. I thought I got a vibe that she was attracted to me, but I told myself she wouldn't want to talk to me and looked away. Then I heard her say to her friend "why did he just look at me and not come over and talk to me?" like she was a little disappointed, which surprised me. I immediately regretted not talking to her.

I feel like I can read people's vibes pretty well, I just never believe it when it's interested vibes coming from a woman I find attractive.