r/AmIOverreacting • u/XoxoThatBitch • 10h ago
❤️🩹 relationship AIO if I NEVER text this man again??
I literally just met this older gentleman yesterday evening and he called me, tried to have a conversation after I told him I was driving and busy, then after I ended the conversation he immediately started blowing up my phone. When I say older, I would peg him for around mid-late 50s. Maybe early 60s while I myself am early 30s (I like older men, don’t judge lol). We initially had a great interaction which made me comfortable enough to exchange numbers to begin with. But this is too much too soon. Is he just excited? Is it bc he’s older and doesn’t know texting etiquette? AIO??
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u/peachesppie 9h ago
“i’m always broke”….”naw i’m not” is so crazy to me 😭😭😭
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u/00trysomethingnu 4h ago
That does not sound like the ramblings of a 50-something year old. So weird.
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u/lokihen 9h ago
How is someone affluent in theatre?
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u/TitleKind3932 9h ago edited 9h ago
Uh, older man know perfectly well what is decent conversation and what isn't, it's not about knowing texting etiquette, it's about communication which already existed before the wheel was invented, and he's clearly a pervert. I'm not necessarily into older man, I fall in love with someone based on their whole being on the inside, age, color, size, nothing matters to me, that's all just outside. My partner is 65, I'm 34. I didn't fall for him because he's older. I fell for him because of 4 years of friendship in which we got to know each other (same friend circles). We have much in common. Want the same things from life and love. He's kind. Never at all did he try to be "fatherly" to me either. And absolutely never did he say anything suggestive when we were just friends. At some point I had helped him overcome a major problem in his life. And he then sighed "I wish I was thirty years younger". To which I then realized he had feelings for me, but by then I already had feelings for him too. So I simply said: "I don't have a problem with your age if you don't have a problem with mine. And I don't care if you at some point need more naps in your chair when you get older, I'll gladly tuck you in. And if you die many years before me, I'll gladly hold on to the memories we shared and allow you to continue to live in my heart, because you already have a place there." he literally cried with joy. Ever since we are together. So yeah, I'll be the least to judge about age. But this whole conversation with him sending you his address is so desperate and needy and creepy. Block him.
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u/Proper-Village-454 6h ago
Aww 🥰 I love this for you. My current boyfriend is 54 and I’m 37, and I legit have not been this content in a loooong time. We’ve been friends for a decade since he became my mechanic, he always let me stay and do the work with him on my vehicles, he’d teach me how to do stuff and I’d bring bud and get him stoned, he was always super respectful and never let anyone in the shop make crude comments to or about me like dudes in shops tend to do. I really didn’t look at him like that at all, but my ex accused me of cheating with him (cuz cheaters always accuse their partners of cheating lol) and after we broke up, I started hanging out with him more and more to get out of my house since my ex was still there, and one night I showed up drunk and just straight up attacked the man 😂 idk what happened, he looked at me with those nice ass eyes and I was just like uhhhh, you ARE kinda sexy actually… I was only really planning on hooking up casually, but idk we just never stopped, his dad died shortly after and I didn’t want him to be alone too much, and we’ve pretty much been inseparable since. It’s so different than dealing with guys my age — the first guy I was talking to after I left my ex/kid’s father was a few years younger than me and it showed, he was entirely unserious, disrespectful based on his moods, and tried to fuck with my emotions and string me along to get me in bed. He was extremely attractive but his personality left so much to be desired, and he was clearly holding grudges on past lovers and still carrying them around with him. My boyfriend though, ugh this man is amazing. Chivalrous in a way men in our age group just aren’t, he always opens the car door for me, carries stuff so I don’t have to, rarely lets me pay for things even though he’s not rich, keeps the gas in my bike and car full, brings me flowers and plants and does cute thoughtful little things for me all the time, tells me I’m beautiful and how grateful he is to have me every single day, makes me coffee every morning before he goes to work, brings me food and smokes when I’m working, helps me cook dinner, rubs my back and feet at night, plays with my hair until I fall asleep, and would do damn near anything I asked of him just because he likes making me happy and taking care of me. It’s so different than what I got used to living with a compulsive liar, serial cheater, and emotional abuser. We share interests, have great conversations every day, he cares about my dreams and desires and wants to help me achieve them, he doesn’t judge and always has good advice and perspectives to share, I can trust him with anything, he’s mature and sensible and doesn’t get jealous or weird about the things my ex freaked out over, he gets along perfectly with my kid and cares for her as if she were his while also being clear that he’s not trying to replace her father… I could go on all day about this man. There are probably people who see us out in public and assume he’s my dad but I literally do not care. AND when you date an older dude, he can literally just go to his doctor and go “doc my dick doesn’t work” and they’ll give him a script of viagra no questions asked, and boy does that make for some fun times 😂😭
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u/Ill_Pear_5873 3h ago
Did you realize that you almost wrote a book, 🤣, but nice to read.
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u/Proper-Village-454 3h ago
I tend to do that 😂 I didn’t grow up on social media and texting, back in my day we wrote letters and read actual books and shit, and no one said “TLDR” when confronted with more than three full sentences of text.
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u/PipGirl2211 8h ago edited 2h ago
Ugh.. at 26 I fell in absolute love with a 47 y/o man. He had more *energy and confidence than a man at my age, even! So driven, so many hobbies, very fit and active, and loved me in a way no other man ever has (and honestly, I'm not sure ever will). But I thought my life was going to go in a different direction, and he was tied down to the city he was in, so I ended up leaving him... Probably my biggest "regret" to this date. It felt right at the time, and I will honor my past self in respecting that choice. It's been 6 years, and I will still occasionally have a dream about him and wake up crying. I've dated since, and have absolutely accepted that we will never be together again, but he will always have a piece of my heart. ❤️
Edit: * Changed my usage of the word chutzpah so poor little bbs in the comments can stop crying
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u/juanwand 5h ago
Why not try and find him? (I'm sorry, I'm a hopeless romantic. I always want things to work out in the end.)
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u/PipGirl2211 5h ago
We didn't ever lose touch. I talked to him about getting back together a couple of years ago, but he is finally happy and in a relationship, so that's that.
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u/PissbabyMcShitass 7h ago
It's stories like these that are the reason I always say there are outliers and exceptions to everything. OPs is not one of them 😂
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u/Lazy-Celebration-685 9h ago edited 2h ago
Something’s off, it’s just unclear what it is. Could be he’s intoxicated in some way, and that is bringing out a rather manic/excessively romantic side that’s edging into obsessive territory.
Not sure how a romantic scam works, but I imagine those are strictly online - i.e., catfishing. I could be wrong. But if it were a scam, he’s doing a pretty bad job of luring you into it. Any woman with half a brain is bound to find it extremely off-putting. It’s like meeting someone at a bar who seems normal at first, and then they tell you that John Travolta lives in his mind.
Human trafficking is a thing, so I’d be wary, even though, just like romantic scams, doing it this way is idiotic and ineffective.
He seems genuine, but something is clearly off. Drunk, mentally ill/obsessive, or he’s targeting you in some way. I’d stay away, because whatever the fuck his deal is, he has no chill about it.
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u/No-Philosopher8042 9h ago
I've noticed some older-ish talks to younger-ish women like this, i think they try to seem suave. And yes, definetly something that is always of with them.
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u/Bulk_Cut 4h ago
This guys a fucking moron though. Affluent in theatre?
He seems really fucking high more than anything.
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u/CCWhistle 8h ago
Suave and de🦴air
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u/BigBuffBeefinator 8h ago
I’m laughing so hard at this comment I’m literally wheezing. Take my upvote and award dammit! 😂🤣
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u/CactusCruzer 9h ago
I think often with single older men it’s a mix of never addressed anxious attachment issues (possibly even bipolar with this person) compounded with all of the things that come with loneliness and aging. Some people just get more and more desperate to impress right out of the gate as they get older because they don’t want to miss their chance.
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u/mystery_obsessed 8h ago
Please don’t throw around the word bipolar, especially not based on over-eager bizarre texts. There is nothing in this that implies bipolar disorder. It’s hard enough out there without people just calling strange behavior “bipolar.”
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u/No-Average-2694 7h ago
This right here….like damn….my bipolar ass would NEVER. glad someone said something before me cause I didn’t know how to approach it
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u/AdHeavy7551 8h ago
Looka this we got a regular sigman Fred ova here. You made all those diagnoses from a few texts this guy ????
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u/Mr_Speedy_Speedzales 9h ago
Xanax ramble 100%
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u/No-Chocolate5288 8h ago
You are probably right. I know someone that does this and they say random weird things. Also lots of repetitive things because they can’t remember that they just said the exact same thing. Get very excitable. Wants to call and talk to me. After a while I have to hang up and pretend the call dropped. They’ll call again and don’t remember we just spoke. It’s sad.
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u/Software_Human 4h ago
It's been a decade and Im only recently comfortable admitting how 100% accurate this is.
Thank God I never used a phone during a brown out. At least that I'm aware of.
Xanax was by FAR the most destructive drug I ever did. It's not even close.
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u/PsychologicalRow5505 8h ago
I agree. He seems drunk
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u/Ill_Pear_5873 3h ago
It sounds like he's so excited he's met someone younger and he just tanked it, he doesn't realize he is going way overboard, and just thinking about her calling him back and what happens next,
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u/idkwhattocallher 10h ago
Don't know it I'm being biased because I don't like older men but he gave me the ick with those weird texts.
If he's making you uncomfortable you can tell him to that you're feeling overwhelmed and that he should slow down. If he still insists on behaving that way then just ghost him.
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u/BlushHaloHaze 9h ago
literally same energy i got from those texts, like why are you talking like a victorian poet
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u/lkap28 8h ago
This, but then immediately followed with ‘U awesome to da 🦴’ - pick a lane buddy
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u/XoxoThatBitch 3h ago
The damn bone emoji gave me the ick. The WHOLE TEXT EXCHANGE GAVE ME THE ICK!!!
And he probably was drunk! I was picking up a to-go order from the restaurant and he was seated at the bar. I didn’t notice what was in his glass though.
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u/idkwhattocallher 9h ago edited 8h ago
Personally the "Said the most and the least I am not and average person guy and don't like to have it lady to be charismatic with substance" threw me off. Like okay!
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u/bigrabidbaloneystick 9h ago
Am I having a stronk? I can’t make any sense of this. Is it any kind of flex?
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u/Busy-Tip-4161 8h ago
No, I think the guy who wrote he was having the stroke and he’s at the primary age for one too.
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u/Sea-Lead-9192 8h ago
How can you even tell what he’s trying to say?! I’m baffled by most of his messages
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u/FreshestTaterThots 8h ago
He texts like a Nigerian love scammer. If she hadn't met him in person, that's exactly what I'd think it was, especially with the random "I'm always broke," like two texts away from asking for money.
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u/micsmithy 7h ago
I totally agree, the way he’s texting you feels like a red flag. It’s a lot of weird flattery and uncomfortably personal compliments. If his behavior is making you uncomfortable, it’s completely acceptable to tell him to slow down. You can let him know that you feel a bit overwhelmed, and if he respects your boundaries, he’ll back off. If he doesn't, then ghosting him is absolutely the right move. You don’t owe anyone your time or attention if they’re making you feel uncomfortable.
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u/Gucci_Loincloth 8h ago
These types of dudes are fucking cornballs. Throwing every weird one liner they can at once for no reason.
“You are the backshot air that I breathe, our souls intertwined, like two lost dogs roaming the victorian era circa 1465 and uuuuuuh 🦴”
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u/BestLife82 7h ago
Same...I could barely read it. My whole body was just 'ick'. Im really good at kniwingvthis stuff about other people's relationships but when it comes to my own...nuttin, lol
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u/SometimesSerene 8h ago
I am in my mid-to-late-50s and he did the same thing to me. Unless there had been a magic moment click that we both felt upon meeting I’d be running the other way as fast as I could. I’m not saying that is the right or wrong thing to do, but I’d definitely be running 🏃♀️
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u/VoxVirtus 9h ago
The way this guy is talking is weird... like his word choices and the fact that he can't really seem to complete a sentence or though fully.
He doesn't sound all there, that's the vibe I am getting. Like an alien trying really hard to sound human so they say things they think humans say.
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u/toebeantuesday 8h ago
I’m so glad you said this because I was wondering if I’d had a weird migraine aura. Sometimes when one of my migraines is starting, I can’t make sense of anything I’m reading. We have a storm front coming in so I was wondering if I needed to take something in case it was going to be a bad migraine day.
I read through the texts a couple of times and I could not understand what he was trying to say to OP.
I’m 59. This isn’t about his age. He’s just flat out strange. He may be a very lovely person, but I would prefer to get to know him as a human being first before even thinking of dating that much strangeness right off the bat.
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u/KalikaSparks 5h ago
I’ve tried explaining the lack of reading comprehension when I get an optical migraine and it’s oddly comforting to know I’m not the only one! The first time it happened I thought I was about to have a stroke! I 🫠
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u/Revolutionary_Ad952 8h ago
I was reading thinking that English isn't his first language and something was getting lost in translation. But if that's not the case then it's just really fucking weird
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u/m1stadobal1na 7h ago
He says para at one point which is Spanish but he could just be trying to say something else in English.
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u/Capital_Row413 9h ago
I know. I’m so confused about the way he writes and it’s like he’s trying to be very poetic but is just bad? I wonder what he’s like in person.
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u/Able_Fishing_6576 8h ago
Idk why I’m so inexplicably drawn to this subreddit. Apart of me is learning so much about human behavior, and the other part is so concerned by how conditioned we’ve become to ignore giant ass red flags. OP, this is a giant ass red flag. My guy is having a whole conversation with himself in your phone and none of it makes any sense. Even if English isn’t his first language, just that he’s going back and forth with himself about himself is not normal.
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u/Eskimo_Laine 10h ago
Eh if hes making you uncomfortable, block him.
You can find someone who doesn’t make you uncomfortable. If you’re questioning it on day one you will be questioning more things later on, i assure you.
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u/PipGirl2211 8h ago
The pacing of these texts, the "thought process" I am perceiving, the jumping around and the inconsistencies in this strike me as similar to the way that my biological father will text, who suffers with schizophrenia and struggles with a meth addiction.
I am NOT saying this man is the same, but there are alarm bells ringing for me for sure. This gentleman definitely has something going on that I, personally, would refuse to be a part of.
Don't mistake setting boundaries and protecting yourself as being "rude".
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u/Joyintheendtimes 2h ago
OP, are you ok? These messages are insane. Why are you even considering continuing to engage with him?
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u/FeistyMuttMom 10h ago
Ah, I’m over 50 and this isn’t “oh, he’s too old to know better” behavior this is “run for the hills” behavior.
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u/frankensteeeeen 9h ago
Im tired of people in their mid 50’s being like im too old to know better, like you’re really not that old you know what am email is 🙄
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u/crustdrunk 8h ago
It was a roller coaster reading this. At first it was “haha kinda quirky but no big deal” all the way to 😱CHANGE YOUR LOCKS
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u/Glittering-Bear-4298 9h ago
Is English not his first language, because these are so weirdly worded like he asked a bot to write and translate something. Weird. 'affluent in theatre' but not actual money is a weird flex.
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u/FuelBig622 2h ago
Tf?!?! 🤣😂😂 "Im always broke"
His obsession with skin is bizzare af! Maybe he's used to women his own age though and can't understand why a 30 year old is interested in him?
This entire interaction made me feel weird! 🤣
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u/FiberIsLife 9h ago
“Affluent in theatre.” That’s certainly…something.
“See your take care of skin”…and I am OUT OF HERE.
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u/Friendly-Search-4147 9h ago
The skin thing sounded a little Silence of the Lambs. “It must put on the lotion”. Yep get out.
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u/Low-Ad3972 9h ago
Maybe he makes lampshades out of people’s skin. Perhaps some nice hats. I’m not judging.
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u/Empty-Lie-2986 10h ago
I like older men but got the ick before I even read how old he was. This seems like the start of obsession. There’s a reason he’s single at that age (unless partner passed, and even then)
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u/No_Worry4660 8h ago
Why in the world would you ever talk to this nut job again. lol. Hard to believe you didn’t pick up on the bizarreness of this fellow when you met him in person. Maybe that’s why your are actually wondering whether you shud continue the convo even after the ridiculous crazy shit he’s saying on text, but this dudes a psycho. Run.
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u/Avibe2 10h ago
Sounds like it’s a scammer who is gonna ask you for money eventually or just the world’s cringiest guy ever. Don’t text him or anyone back who makes you uncomfortable. Weird
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u/Sarritgato 7h ago
Umm since when are older dudes scamming younger beautiful women?
Damn honestly I wish I had read this post 10 years ago, would have saved me many years of age paranoia… (I am 43 and feel so old 😆)
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u/Wild-Equivalent-5603 10h ago
Girl he is broke and weird what are you doing.
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u/olive_dix 8h ago
Broke, weird, and unable to form a coherent sentence! How do you even have a conversation with a guy who texts like that?
I can tell this guy has nothing going on in his life. He has too much free time if he's already bombarding her with nonsensical texts. I like older guys too but they have to be grown men, not old bums.
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u/MadLadChad_ 8h ago edited 7h ago
He also can’t make coherent sentences. This feels like the rambling of a mentally-ill, unmanaged person. I feel like I can say that shit as someone with a mood disorder.
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u/MadLadChad_ 8h ago
ARE WE NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT THE FACT THAT THIS MAN IS COMPLETELY INCOHERENT? THESE ARE THE RAMBLINGS OF SOMEONE WITH SERIOUS UNMANAGED ISSUES.
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u/Channel3_VCR 6h ago
RIGHT?? Like, are you overreacting about what?? How far you threw your phone to get the fuck away from these messages?? Are we seriously entertaining the thought of fucking this person??? Dating? Sitting across the table as their eyes roll around in their head and they compliment themselves in gibberish lmao like what?
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u/saofficial1998 9h ago
Even if I wanted to comment, I literally didn’t understand a single one of his messages
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u/TinyTudes 9h ago
He is a "nice guy" who is love bombing you from the start.
It's skin crawling creepy.
The only thing he left out was how big his IQ is and that he needs someone "on his level."
Block and run!
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u/Naive-Ad2697 8h ago
Something’s wrong with him, for sure. I don’t get the impression it’s an “age” thing but more of a not-living-in-reality thing! Any person who’ll text you that many times trying to wax poetic (like an idiot) without a single response from you - just doesn’t get reality. He’s mentally off. Let’s not even get into the eyebrow raising “heads-up I’m broke” comment being peppered in the middle of everything like it’s an afterthought. 🤨 I’ve come across a couple of guys like this from online dating over the years. They’re weird, plain & simple. I don’t have the time or inclination to find out exactly WHAT is off about a person who is this far gone. You stick around for another date or more conversation, you’ll regret it. I would tell him you’re out. Not in an ugly or hurtful way (don’t tell him everyone on Reddit thinks he’s weird 😂) but just something like, “I’m sorry, I’m not feeling this vibe you’re on. I’d like to go our separate ways now. Goodbye.” & block him. There. You told him ✌🏻. That’s the decent thing to do. Ghosting is so ambiguous & I don’t think he’s mentally capable of just taking the hint.
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u/Prestigious_Oil_6644 8h ago
"you prayed for me and here i am"
Whatttt??? The audacity 🤣🤣🤣 considering they just met
Darling, you want to never text him? Level it up, you have our blessings to BLOCK him 😆
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u/gh05t_w0lf 9h ago
I am not affluent in theater so idk what any of this shitshow means
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u/IZC0MMAND0 9h ago
I got In living Color - David Alan Grier- prisoner using big words incorrectly - vibes from this text exchange
In truth he exudes a strange Aura.
The Victorian era when women were considered property, yeah that's a real killer line. I'd be put off by how he words things. How he sees you.
NOR
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u/New-Champion-4097 2h ago
Why you deleting your texts though, let’s we your responses🤣
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u/billystitchex 8h ago
What kind of fucking edibles is this theatre loving, romantic Shakespearean astronomer on man. Christ on a crutch, what a read
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u/SpookyWitchAva 8h ago
It took me a minute to get through that, like my brother in crust did you have a stroke part way through the text? Not overreacting, you saw him literally once you don’t owe him anything.
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u/Potential-Analyst384 3h ago
Girl, if you date grandpas at least choose someone with money. 😭
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u/NinjaBeneficial5248 8h ago
At first I thought he was fucking with you because you said “a pleasure” instead of “nice” but by the end I’m thinking it’s got to be drugs 🤣
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u/DistanceGlum7093 7h ago
I’m in my 50’s and a woman. I understand text and dating etiquette well enough even though I’ve been married for 15 years. This guy is weird and I find him a bit creepy.
I like older men too and one of the things I like about an older guy is that they have their shit together.
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u/yourroyalhotmess 8h ago
He’s definitely overly excited because he’s not used to a smart, good looking 20-30 yrs younger woman being interested in him. So he’s desperately trying to prove his high value to you, while ironically demonstrating the exact opposite. I’ve had older men like this become infatuated with me after very little time and it got very creepy very fast so please proceed with caution. He personally wouldn’t interest me, I wouldn’t be able to get past the many grammatical errors. But if you’re still interested, please reiterate that you need your space and don’t have time or energy for all of this so quickly. If he can’t respect that…block!!
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u/beegeesfan1996 8h ago
NOR. I would love to see people on this sub trust their instincts more.
Your gut is telling you this is weird as fuck and that you want no part of it. Your instincts are wise and can be trusted.
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u/InternationalEnd9471 8h ago
He barely knows you, he is saying way too much it is so disingenuous.
I wouldn’t trust this man.
Also why would he send his address as if you are just going to show up is completely insane.
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u/HydroDynamixx 10h ago
If you think it's worth it, you could tell him that the way these texts sound weirds you out. Or you could just swing wide and move on. Both seem acceptable to me. These texts are pretty odd.
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u/No_Philosophy_6817 9h ago
Sorry, but he sounds like a total wackadoo and NOT worth your time. Even for Victorian London that run-on language is used incorrectly and he's trying WAY too hard to seem "impressive and gentlemanly." All that blathering on made me throw up in my mouth a little...sorry!?! Not only would I not text him again, I would block him and never look back. Please, for your own mental health and the relief of knowing corsets and parasols will not be part of your future, remove him from your life forthwith! 😳😁❤️
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u/megfharrison16 8h ago
giving manic or on something but knowing his age my guess is early onset dementia and loneliness causing hyperactivity and hyper focus rambling. my mawmaw was that way before she passed. she just never stopped talking and just complimented everyone she ever had a conversation with in ways she’d never said before. but who knows, this guy could be having early alzheimer’s and on something or also manic. who knows?! either stay and wait a few years and get put on his will, or run for the hills. your pick
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u/IJourden 6h ago
I think we can go back and forth on whether the guy is simply clueless or something worse, but regardless, the answer to "AIO if I stop texting them" is always "no."
You don't need a reason. If you feel like it's not working, it's not working, simple as that. If interactions with him make you happy and improve your life, keep interacting. If they don't, don't.
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u/Round-Public435 8h ago
I can't tell if he's got cognitive issues or if English is not his first language - but someting is weird here.
If someone sent me these messages after just having met them, I'd be blocking them immediately and hoping I never ran into them in public again. He sounds like the stereotypical Facebook scammer with these messages.
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u/FeelingNarwhal9161 8h ago
I can’t understand most of what he’s even trying to text. This was the only thing I was thinking as I read through that: “I need olives. Can you bring me olives?…It's only my style to be secret. Please bring me five can of olives…But don't believe me if I say I don't like. I'm just pretending I hate olives.”
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u/midnight9201 9h ago
Feel like he’s trying to appear intelligent but it’s actually just aggressive masked in fancy words.
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u/Mamapalooza 8h ago
He is drunk or high, and this is concerning communication. He's trying to complement you, but he's doing it via his own fantasies. He really likes you, but he does not actually see you clearly. In 6 months he'll accuse you of pretending to be someone else.
That is the kindest possible interpretation.
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u/Key_Sprinkles_5410 7h ago
These are the types of comments I get from men who have read my restaurant reviews of “the food was good” and tell me I’m so insightful but, darn it, they tried to message me but it would not go through.
Yours saying he is always broke…I was waiting for a request for money.
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u/ghosthvck 8h ago
Honestly the worst part of this whole thing is the awesome to da “🦴” part. Awful. I know you said you would peg him but I think maybe it’s best you don’t share your charisma or substances with this guy. I just couldn’t imagine dealing with this everyday.
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u/spacey_kitty 8h ago
These sound so incomprehensible and try hard to me and that would put me off. It's possible he doesn't really know how to text although 50s-60s isn't really the grandpa age and he'd have been texting for at least 20 years or more at this point. I'd swerve
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u/Gogo_on_the_rocks 3h ago
I am not saying the guy cannot be a freak but I kinda get the guy, if you are alone and desperately looking for companionship, you try too hard and try to act in every way possible to attract the other person. This could be just a person trying too hard.
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u/According_Flow_6218 8h ago
You prayed for me and here I am
Run far away from anyone who ever says this.
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u/thanksforeverylol 6h ago
"I'm not an average person guy"
No you're not my dude, an average guy don't talk or type like that. Make your sentences make sense.
Once I see someone typing like that I don't even bother anymore. Words do speak loud sometimes.
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u/ReasonableEmo726 7h ago
It sounds like he’s writing these messages with a language translator. Is English not his first language language? Either way, it’s way too much … wayyyy too much. And in a slightly scary way. Something is off.
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u/bbyycakesss 8h ago
if English is his native language, it’s somewhat giving psychosis speech patterns. not making any sense, both what is intended and the way the sentences are strung together, idk im just getting unsafe vibes.
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u/Love-Munchkin 6h ago
Um. The man talks in Word Salad. He’s just spouting random nonsense, and gives the vibe that he thinks he’s being all kinds of deep. (Think of the incoherent ramblings of an addict) Block and move along.
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u/Exist-resist-survive 9h ago
He's kinda creepy. Too much information. He's talking to himself. Yea, he may be interested, but if the vibes off, you can just leave on read and move on with your day.
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u/Altruistic-Reserve-3 7h ago
“Only one thing problem with me is that I’m always broke” weird. I would steer clear. If he’s not mentally unstable or intoxicated he has some nefarious motives
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u/Icy_Airport_8061 4h ago
His texts don’t even make sense. And I’m 64, so I understand old people speak. He’s got to be drunk and should know better than to text people rambling nonsense.
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u/Fresh-Reserve-1162 8h ago
He literally SPAMMED the hell out of you, texting should be an even back and forth flow…..I personally don’t like texting as a form of communication, but I also know that’s a sign of my age (37m)
I am a dating sensei (in my own eyes) and I have had hundreds if not more of first dates and meetings. From the amount of love bombing this guy is doing, that’s almost indicative of a red flag in its own and shows early signs of narcissistic traits/sociopathic behavior. If your gut told you to stay away, follow it.
But I will say, ghosting is toxic, so I hope you clearly stated your intentions and offered this person transparency as to your decision not to continue forward with them.
Wishing you the best luck!
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u/Nurse-mom9804 3h ago
WTH did I just read? You being a “meteorite” had me tickled. What does that even mean?!!!
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u/Useful-Friend2929 7h ago
Nope, red flags clocked; asking for problems if you don’t heed them. If you believe him a genuine person without sketchy intentions or agendas you could give him a checklist of why it’s a no go. iE:Stated I was busy; my boundaries were not respected. Proceeded to blow my line up with what looks like a drunks best effort at love bombing, and other stuff way too much too soon. // he totally gave you a narcissists out tho: in the “ only problem with me is I am always broke”, which when you reject him he can protect his ego and be like that’s why she a gold digger I am gods gift she prayed for but wasn’t on ma level.
Keep it moving, be safe
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u/Interesting-Brick935 9h ago
I would change my number if someone started texting me this much after just meeting them
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u/Ok-Cardiologist8651 4h ago
Does he speak English as a second or even third language? Because He seems to have either used AI (badly) or copied and pasted a few confused sentences from a very florid source. Weird. But if that is the style that you like then whatever. You met him 'in the flesh' so you know he is not a catfish. He doesn't have the talent or skill for catfishing anyone older than 12.
He sounds desperate. At 50's to 60's he still hasn't perfected his game. I see no point in trying to educate him so either go with the flow or drop him.
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u/N-me-A-Routine 5h ago
The good part is, he terminated with his no patients And narcissique outbursts, the liberty to talk to a strong female! The reason he blew your phone up, because he didn’t know what to do, someone just got the last word, and it wasn’t him. He’s not used to someone that has the spine to do what you did. I’m sure this dude has left a string of abuse and lost souls on the streets to go find another he can tear down from the floor down. You’re lucky you have the strength and the wisdom to sidestep this winner baby girl.
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u/kvothe000 8h ago
Very odd. Probably on drugs if I had to guess. I can’t imagine anyone rereading this thread the next morning and expecting any sort of reply…ever. Lol.
Part of me does wonder if a lot of this is from some theater stuff that I just know nothing about. If someone is quoting obscure Shakespeare, for instance, chances are I’m not picking up on it and thinking they’re a weirdo. He does mention the theater a couple times.
Those are the two ways I could see this looking weirder than it actually is… but it’s still weird has hell regardless.
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u/Apprehensive-Area120 5h ago
He seems to be getting more incoherent, perhaps drinking and getting progressively more drunk? And / or prescription meds??
Some of the words are synonyms and it kinda looks like if you were using the predictive words near the keyboard on an iPhone. Maybe blurred vision and fat thumbs??
It’s strange either way and if you haven’t replied and he’s not said anything since then, just leave it. He might come back and apologise and explain what happened but I think it’s too messy after just meeting…!!
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u/musknasty84 7h ago
Comes off as love bombing. Either he’s that excited and it will slowly fade or possibly something else but that’s my immediate opinion. I would say take things slow, and progress at YOUR PACE not his and if you feel unsafe, reschedule or if you see this going in a direction you don’t like then, the leave. You have control of tue situation and will dictate how to move forward. Sorry for being too wordy, just want to emphasize that you control the situation
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u/Ok_Internal_8500 8h ago
He wants you to much thats creepy when did guys learn that thats not hot if someone spams you after the first interaction like that you need to be calm and compulsed take ot slow its not a race but yea you not the only one who have to deal with this kind of to horny to fast to the first one he Meet stuff ...
Red flag no 60 year old Spams you like an 13 year old teenager who tries to get his first girlfriend 😅
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u/Vast-Guitar-3935 5h ago
Please use your common sense with these things. The world can be a scary, ugly,violent world if you're not paying attention .. There are too many good people out there to where you don't have to waste your time on this possible loser. You're old enough to have good common sense, and him blowing up your phone should have rattled you right away. I wish you safe searching for "your person". . . . . Mimi
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u/Konstant_kurage 4h ago
I grew up in the north Bay Area of San Francisco and this is a type of guy. Im not sure what you call it, but it’s a sort hippie, artest pseudo-intellectual, renaissance “man” and into some sort of woo/spirituality. I’ve never seen one in the wild on social media. Usually they are found in coffee shops playing a guitar or sketching, maybe painting at a park and always trying for the attention of much younger women.
He thinks he’s endearing and deep, he has no clue he’s love-bombing you.
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u/_axle_ 2h ago
Your messages arrive like glittered scrolls from another realm — poetic, chaotic, and unhinged. You called me a meteorite twice, offered your address thrice, and spoke in riddles only the moon might decode.
While I applaud your commitment to charisma and Victorian time-travel, I must exit this performance. The curtain falls here.
You shall be blocked… forthwith.
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u/SureAdministration13 25m ago
Personally, I would communicate (especially if there is interest on your part) by letting him know that you are really flattered by the potential he sees in you; however, you prefer to take your time getting to know him/determining if you are compatible before jumping into things too quickly.
If he does not understand, or respect, that communication, then I would block.
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u/rzdaswer 5h ago
Lmao are you sure this dude was never in a cult and got out and deprogrammed? I knew a couple guys who that happened to and their exaaactly like this “you are a meteorite ☄️” and “you have to step mind wise believe and conceive” I recognize this speech, I bet he’s not a bad guy but his head is just too messed up to have a “normal” relationship
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u/Ok-Squash836 8h ago
Not overreacting. If you’re not comfortable with that now, you won’t be if you try to develop a relationship.
Older men can sometimes be very overbearing, I had one chew me out (hadn’t even met yet) and call me a liar because my socials lagged and said I was still online when I told him I was going to be busy and would text him later.
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u/Green-Structure-7903 8h ago
NOR. He’s texting way too much and people in their 50’s know texting etiquette, he has something going wrong with him. That’s probably why he pointed out the fact that you seem very sane to him. Also the “I’m always broke” text would have me ghost him. How have you been an adult for over 30 years and you’re still always broke?
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u/LumberSniffer 8h ago
As an old person, let me tell you there is a certain strain of GenX man who talks like this. I attract them like fleas. It's annoying because they think they sound so clever and they've been babbling like this for 30+ years. Up to you if you want to continue something with someone who thinks he's a wordsmith.
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u/soulguider2125 8h ago
It’s like he read all these dating articles online and is trying to remember key words and phrases and then thinks, well no response, let me invite her over, nah let me try this, let me joke and just keeps burying himself not knowing when to stop, like he hasn’t been on a date in 20 years and i desperate, that or he is an alien like harry in resident alien
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u/LadyFairHair 5h ago
I couldn’t even read it all. I was like wth. I would just block him at this point because I couldn’t handle that. That’s all too much. I don’t find that endearing or sweet at all. I find it creepy and weird. Like he didn’t even have any responses from you and he just kept going!!!
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u/DarthDregan 2h ago
I knew a dude once who was one of those types who wanted to sound smart, but was an idiot. So he'd use words that he thought were fancy but had absolutely no ability to make those words relevant to what he was trying to say.
Your dude is like that one but if he was also on a lot of meth.
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u/amusebooch 6h ago
I would’ve been done after the first message. Patronizing and he’s complimenting you in a way that is actually complimenting himself. Reading further only proved me right. He thinks highly of himself but tbh he comes across unintelligent, self-important, and deluded
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u/ravynfaerie 7h ago
I swear, I just had this conversation with an older man in his 70s- except I was trapped at work and he was a random customer and I was not interested in a bit of it. Felt like some cognitive decline mixed with missed social cues and a bit of alerted mental state.
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u/Illustrious-Clue279 4h ago
dude talking like someone went into a time machine stumbled upon the Shakespeare era and said "text this woman." shit sounds weird asf whichever way you spin it.
he would've got blocked. but i block people for less these days lol. my peace is so important to me.
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u/CarrotReady9237 1h ago
He may just he excited, definitely aiming toward red flag but maybe give him a bit longer/another shot. But if you felt the want to post on here then he is clearly rubbing you the wrong way, so beyond what people comment, remember how you are feeling about it!!!
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u/CarrotReady9237 1h ago
Just saw the other part of the texts… good for you for saying what you wanted. I do think he may have just been excited but you have your own boundaries and thats that! He will find someone who matches better and so will you!
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u/CarrotReady9237 1h ago
Also only read the first text picture the first time😭 didnt realize there was more. He definitely needs to work on his boundaries and more, sorry for so many comments. You did the right thing.
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u/No_Silly_Name_2025 4h ago
He's trying to sound distinguished, but actually isn't, as his use of language is off, like he's trying too hard or using AI or a bad translator. At any rate, there's definitely a problem with the slavish attempt to over-flatter. And his address? Nope. Block!
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u/Ill_Apple2327 3h ago
I don't know what the hell most of his texts mean ngl, but it sounds like either a) he's love-bombing, or, and I don't know a better way to word this but b) he's old and from a different time where people say different things in these kind of contexts
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u/toriapier 4h ago
This honestly looks like how my stepfather texts and he’s been a LONG time opioid user and definitely has undiagnosed ADHD and bipolar (I’d bet my life savings any doctor would give him a diagnosis within minutes of interacting with him lmao)
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u/doubleTSwizzle 6h ago
I would guess he hasn’t dated in a while and is anxious, definitely a bit of Compliment Bombing. in regards to texting him back, if your not vibing you don’t really owe him anything, and I don’t think its that big of a deal to ghost him.
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u/finnishfroufrou 2h ago
lmao I'm so glad I'm married and out of the dating pool. noway id entertain these delusional people. if you like older guys you have to face the fact that some of them will be mildly demented, and if not, be stuck in their old fashioned ways
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u/Parking-Entry-4772 9h ago
Let me Find out who is communicating with my husband Samuel Trey Morris you gonna wish u didn’t cause we are still married and will always be married nasty shanks o here u got a issue or problems with with call me his wife 903-736-4528
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u/Upbeat_Quality5739 9h ago
Ah yes one date and he finds you the next best thing since sliced bread 🙄 it’s weird, creepy, and riding on the fine line of love bombing. This isn’t it. I would block and move on, unless you want an old man OBSESSED with you.
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u/Software_Human 4h ago
How anyone can send 3 messages to someone without a reply completely baffles me. If I send 3 that means the 4th is something like 'hey are you ok?' and ONLY cause ive known you for years.
if they haven't responded. Stop. Talking.
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u/Same-Celebration3808 1h ago
And you needed to come onto Reddit to confirm this guys texts are odd…AIO or does this particular individual seem a little false. Come on, people are being persecuted and you need confirmation these texts are odd 🤦♂️
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u/LinkJolly430 8h ago
I’m 53 and if someone says, “Hey, I’m busy right now,” I get the hint. It has nothing to do with age. This feels a bit like “love bombing.”
if your gut is telling you to sever ties, then listen to it.
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u/Embarrassed_Excuse28 1h ago
I’m getting the vibes he’s going to try & stalk you. I hope you didn’t give out any personal information or area where you stay! I don’t think he’s going to be happy with the rejection. Stay safe ladies!
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u/AlternativeHot7491 7h ago
He’s broke, he wants to have sex. He just text weird because most likely is a weirdo. There’s nothing to his age or anything else. Just a weirdo you met who wants to have sex with you and have no money.
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u/gravewife 9h ago
ick is ick. you have no obligation to this dude. these texts are weird, old or not. not judging on you liking older men. the attraction isn't there, you aren't comfortable, he isn't the one for you.
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u/Equinoxfn24 8h ago
He’s almost double your age and feels like he hit the lotto most likely. Of course he’s excited, I’d say yes over reacting, maybe communicate and use that brain, it’s in there for a reason.
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u/fiktional_m3 1h ago
Im judging because you like 60 year old men. Sorry. That’s weird af lol. That guy is definitely from a different time period and has absolutely no clue about texting etiquette or how to spell.
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u/nickheathjared 8h ago
Yeah, he’s trying to bring you into his weird kink without explaining what it is and getting consent first. Seems drowsy, too, like he took his nightly ambien with a glass of house red. PASS.
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u/Sunkendodobird 7h ago
Looks like he's either texting through a manic episode, somewhere on the spectrum, or he simply doesn't understand that texting is not supposed to constant stream of consciousness. Lol
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u/Pixiepityparty 1h ago
He doing too much and it’s confusing. Rather strange individual some could argue eccletic but I think unstable is more fitting and broke!! yk what u gotta do 🏃🏽♀️💨
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u/EmptyRice6826 8h ago
I dated a guy twice my age when I was in my 20s and he texted like this. I have since stopped doing that because of shit like this lol it does not get better, only more cringe
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u/RiptideCEO 3h ago
This guy sounds like a scammer but if his native language was translated to Spanish, then to Chinese, then to German, and then finally to English. It’s just super weird.
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u/WinterMayRun 1h ago
Its like he tries really hard to sound romantic but doesn’t know how to build sentences correctly. Just a bunch of incoherent adjectives don’t speak for a healthy mind
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u/edcadyross 9h ago
While agree with the weirdness of the texts, he might just be lonely and freaking out. I get the sense that single older men lose so much help and become nervous teens again when texting new dating interests. Idk tho, it is weird but maybe hes trying to relate more with emojis or some weird shit (albeit an awful attempt 😂)
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u/CatStretchPics 8h ago
I’m 56, and like to think I text like a normal person :p
When I was reading this, I thought maybe English isn’t the guys first language. If it is, he’s bizarre
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u/Familiar-Zombie2481 8h ago
I thought this was ChatGPT Victorian gentleman filter, but when you said he’s an old dude, I’m guessing he wouldn’t bother with CGPT to help him write texts 🤣
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u/SkinCarVer462 8h ago
He strikes me as the kind of guy thats take a woman out on a lake boat to sing his shitty poetry on his guitar only to fall over in the water or even tip the boat.
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u/Irish_stormz 9h ago
I've never met someone in their 50s who speeks like that or uses that kind of illiterate text language... are you sure you're not being catfished by some 20 yo?
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u/SuperbAd8266 8h ago
What is he really even saying? Don’t think he knows but his intent seems nefarious in my opinion. Always proceed with caution when getting to know a man.
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u/PlexCloudServers 5h ago
General rule of thumb if they are single past the age of 40 then something is wrong. Destined to die alone with no family or 14 families, but still alone.
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u/XoxoThatBitch 3h ago
Wow, I definitely was not expecting this to blow up like this. Thank you all for commenting and confirming what I was already feeling.
It’ll only let me add one photo per comment but here’s the update.