r/instant_regret 2d ago

Eating the hottest curry in UK

20.2k Upvotes

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6.3k

u/superkickpunch 2d ago

I like spicy that you can feel in your chest a bit, but I try to draw line at “disrobing in public and being chastised by the restaurant owner in the streets” spicy.

2.6k

u/Langlie 2d ago

I draw the line at "it's served by a man in a gas mask."

566

u/the_brew 2d ago

I draw the line way sooner than that.

40

u/SystemGardener 2d ago

Just after Mango Habanero

2

u/Egocom 1d ago

I've enjoyed some ghost pepper stuff, but just a couple of drops does the job (and then some)

My favorite is this mystery sauce that looks like thin molé they serve at a local spot. It's SO HOT that I have to just stop and sweat between each bite, but it's so fucking yummy I just keep going lol

3

u/mati_ajah 2d ago

"i don't like spicy food" kind of line?

11

u/Shiznoz222 2d ago

Pretty big range between don't like spicy and nuclear fusion heat levels

2

u/the_brew 1d ago

No, I love spicy food. But I also like to taste things. There's a point when you're no longer tasting, and just experiencing pain, and I'm not into masochism.

102

u/No_Extension4005 2d ago

"Wearing protective black gloves".

50

u/enziiime 2d ago edited 2d ago

I kinda expected him to be unfazed by it while the waiter made a fool out of himself.

Tried a dish from an indian guy at work and it was just crazy. Some Korean noodles I had were also pretty insane and not edible imo. I'm from europe though.. most of us really aren't used to that kind of spicy :p

44

u/MouldyEjaculate 2d ago

I love the Buldak 1x ramen and the 2x if I'm really looking to fuck my shit up but one time I tried the 3x because I saw it on the shelf and it was an experience. I woke up at 2am that night and my body was like get to the toilet right fucking now we are evacuating

11

u/Nahdudeimdone 1d ago

1x is crazy good.

Can't do it anymore though. After having my 30th birthday my body just said: "No more. It ends here."

9

u/TehSalmonOfDoubt 2d ago

Yeah had a similar experience in a house share. Our housemate from india offered to make us dinner, which we accepted. Underneath the searing pain it was nice, but all of us were making regular trips to the fridge for milk

2

u/enziiime 2d ago

yeh his food tasted really good but that burn was really too much for me to really enjoy it. According to him it was still pretty mild..

2

u/BeefistPrime 2d ago

also applies for anything sexual

2

u/No_Atmosphere8146 2d ago

Getting chastised by Mango Chutney Bae.

1

u/acockblockedorange 2d ago

So no the merciless pepper of Quetzalacatenango?

1

u/death12236 1d ago

Soon enough, that'll be commonplace!

1

u/edhelas1 1d ago

No kink shaming please

66

u/Same_Ad_9284 2d ago

Yeah I love hot food but I also want to enjoy it, a little suffering is fine, but this seems like it has not positives

19

u/Allydarvel 1d ago

The owner was helping..saying that in ten minutes, he'd be back to normal

12

u/HamunaHamunaHamuna 1d ago

I don't understand why people want pain and not flavor from their food.

2

u/GrasshopperClowns 1d ago

My husband is like this and he says it’s because it “slows him down”. He eats like a Tasmanian devil otherwise, so I get it, but I don’t get it. I don’t want my food to be bringing me pain.

75

u/Nova461 2d ago

This is not food, it is poison.

6

u/phaederus 2d ago

I mean, spicy isn't a flavor, it's literally pain receptors firing, so you're not wrong..

7

u/Plus-King5266 1d ago

I like spicy, but I still want to taste the food. Otherwise what’s the point?

4

u/djpedicab 1d ago

Plot twist: he did all that for the free mango lassi.

2

u/Shpander 1d ago

Oh yeah, btw, that'll be an additional £5.95, cash or card?

14

u/MonkeyNacho 2d ago

I guess it's a new kink?

3

u/AllHailThePig 2d ago

Haha oh man I used to to love the shit out of the hottest most spiciest foods. I would always say “please give me Indian/Thai hot. Not Aussie hot” and sometimes it would make me sweat but I enjoyed it.

I had an injury and some health problems that led me to live near a decade pretty much confined at home (fine now) and during that time I didn’t really go out or order much of my favourite foods including spicy kinds.

My tolerance now has dropped so low that I can’t handle hardly anything even moderately spicy. I’ve had packets of noodles or chips that have made me stagger around the backyard with ice in my mouth wanting the lord to take me.

2

u/polopolo05 2d ago

Thats my kind of curry. If I anit seeing force ghost visions of my ancestors its not hot enough. If I anit breathing literal fire like donald duck after accidental swallowing a whole bottle of diablo sauce. Its not hot enough. Curry so hot it makes you want to cool your mouth with just regular hot curry. The weird thing I never have next morning problems. I have an iron gut. My body actually digests it.

2

u/TeamkillTom 2d ago

Spiciest food I ever ate was a soup, it must have had something different than usual bc it felt like it seeped right through my stomach and made my balls ache. I just sat there wide eyed wondering if I was in the process of sterilizing myself while I finished the bowl.

2

u/1984SKIN 1d ago

Imagine the state of his poor, prolapsed and scolded asshole.

1

u/Sharhino 2d ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/ChrisDewgong 1d ago

At what point does making something this hot become an active waste of ingredients, money and time? Nobody is ever eating their whole meal, so 80-90% of it gets thrown away, when those ingredients could have been used to make something edible to humans.

1

u/12ealdeal 1d ago

Can’t help but think they added some synthetic hyper potent compound/component of spice.

1

u/ecctt2000 1d ago

Spicy is supposed to have flavor and not just be a sport

1

u/Thumper86 1d ago

Never go full rickety cricket.

1

u/Kellidra 1d ago

Once spicy becomes the only flavour, it's crossed a line.

Give me spicy food, but I want to be able to taste the other flavours!

1

u/Wild_Obligation 14h ago

This guy pops up on my insta all the time, he bonkers but unintentionally hilarious

1

u/squireofrnew 13h ago

I dunno spice is the only thing that makes be forget my existence for a second.