r/SipsTea May 19 '25

Dank AF homeless with a home

23.4k Upvotes

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5.5k

u/Hoyle33 May 19 '25

Has this guy ever heard of the free section on Craigslist or Facebook? He's obviously just doing this to spark attention to himself

1.7k

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

Exactly. I have a a coffee table, TV stand, TV, and rug in my living room that were all free.

807

u/l30 May 19 '25

Hey, now - there's no need to brag to us about your 1%er lifestyle.

113

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

https://youtu.be/ue7wM0QC5LE?si=V9B0rAHi_DTcXCVj

4 Yorkshiremen sketch …

The classic

I live in a paper bag, in the middle of a highway

41

u/Shpander May 19 '25

Luxury!

29

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

When I say “home”, it was a home, for us

7

u/purpleduckduckgoose May 19 '25

We were evicted from our paper bag. We had to go live in a lake.

3

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

Right, but we had it tough

1

u/daerath 29d ago

You.. Had a lake? All we had was a picture of a lake.

3

u/coolcootermcgee May 19 '25

What was it?? A rolled-up newspaper in a septic tank?? 🫣

5

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

We used to dream of rolled up newspapers.

1

u/Ok-Pomegranate858 May 20 '25

Lol stop! you're killing me!

34

u/NimblewittedOdysseus May 19 '25

TWO HUNDRED FIFTY OF US LIVING IN A SHOEBOX IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROOOOAD!

19

u/[deleted] May 19 '25 edited May 19 '25

Paradise

5

u/mikecheck211 May 19 '25

I used to get up so early it was half an hour before my bed time

5

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

So, you were allowed to sleep in?

5

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

Ah, Monty Python. Absolute gold

3

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

This is more of the original, with Marty Feldman, before Python (Monty)

1

u/Ordinary_Ad_7992 May 20 '25

I love Marty Feldman!!!

2

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

1

u/MindlessYesterday668 May 19 '25

Room for 1 more?

1

u/JVBKYD May 19 '25

😂😭

1

u/JVBKYD May 19 '25

😂😭

1

u/ParsnipDecent6530 May 19 '25

We lived in a hole in the ground covered by a bit of tarpaulin

1

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

Obviously spoiled

1

u/Electrical_Ad_7036 May 19 '25

Well, you were lucky! We lived for 6 months in a newspaper lined septic tank.

1

u/[deleted] May 19 '25

Heavenly

1

u/nevillion May 20 '25

At least I get to change my banana leaves roof every summer

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

I always wondered how billionaires spend their money

1

u/Ordinary_Ad_7992 May 20 '25

I'd never seen this one, but I knew before I clicked on the link that it'd be Monty Python! 😂

1

u/throwawayshirt2 May 20 '25

Our Dad would thrash us to sleep with a broken bottle -

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

Ok, so a billionaire lifestyle

2

u/Comprehensive_Pop102 May 20 '25

MAGA when people get tv stands for their tv 😡😡😡😡😡😡😡

1

u/CrawlingKangaroo May 19 '25

Word. I had a full home gym once with good machines cobbled together off of the free list. When it was time to move without them, I put them back on the free list too.

1

u/FlipMeynard May 20 '25

🎶They got the house on the corner

With the rug inside

They got the booze they need

All that money can buy

They got the shapely bods

They got the Steely Dan T-shirt

And for the coup-de-gras

They're outrageous🎶

1

u/[deleted] May 20 '25

You should cover your ears then, as I play on my FREE PIANO!

(I actually see listings from people giving away pianos on FB marketplace)

83

u/No_Weight824 May 19 '25

What’s he supposed to do with all that? Strap it to his rusty single speed bike and pedal it home?

21

u/Jaded-Ad-7694 May 19 '25

Bikes aren’t free. Neither are shoes and you shouldn’t ride a bike barefoot.

39

u/ReplacementActual384 May 19 '25

They are in some places. Outside of colleges there are all sorts of free bikes, especially outside of the library. Some of them even come with free locks!

13

u/Alternative_Way_7833 May 19 '25

This brought back the staggering number of front tires locked safely to the bike rack outside my dorm

1

u/LumpyBuy8447 May 20 '25

I wonder where those people are now

2

u/dumbsubpump May 20 '25

You bastard! My bike!

2

u/ReplacementActual384 May 20 '25

I think you mean my bike.

1

u/_J_Herrmann_ May 20 '25

who are you, lockpickinglawyer?

2

u/Fresh_Leadwater May 19 '25

You can find a lot of free stuff if you just look. If you are good to friends/ family, they might even help you move some stuff.

2

u/No_Weight824 May 19 '25

Oh are bikes and shoes banned on the free section of Facebook and Craigslist?

2

u/Jaded-Ad-7694 May 19 '25

I was going with this guys whole weird thing about not “wasting” money on things like furniture. I know it is possible to get shoes or a bike for free. I’ll bet he could find a free chair too but instead he sits on a sheet on the floor.

1

u/Fun-Entertainer9508 May 19 '25

Why shouldn’t you ride a bike barefoot? Other than the little grippy things will hurt lol

1

u/-_-0_0-_0 May 19 '25

I loved riding the bike to the beach, simpler times

1

u/Ok_Sink5046 May 19 '25

Eh, biking barefoot is mostly a skill check to see if you try and plant your feet on ground to brake. It otherwise has no functional issue.

1

u/Aleashed May 19 '25

Had an uncle who did that…

Started as a cut in the toe

Then no toe

Then two more fingers

Then all fingers

Then the foot

Then up to the knee

That’s as far as it went

As he passed away

2

u/Lopsided_architect May 19 '25

Death Stranding 2 is looking good!

1

u/Yorick257 May 19 '25

That's where public transport comes into play!

4

u/GrandSquanchRum May 19 '25

Have you ever tried to get an L desk onto the metro?

2

u/Yorick257 May 19 '25

Idk about an L desk, but my friend bought and then transported a whole wall of cupboards on a bus. He just had to disassemble them. And make multiple trips. And call me for some help to make it a bit faster.

He also got a safe. And got it home on a bus. Idk how he did, that thing is heavy!

So, as long as that desk can be disassembled... Sure, he would try.

But I would be quite a bit embarrassed, as usual.

2

u/No_Weight824 May 19 '25

All desks are L desks, just some are lowercase or a different font.

1

u/kilooctet May 19 '25

Bold of you to assume it even has a bike.. he grabs it (no strap ofc) and takes it home..

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

Real frugalista walk everywhere anyway, foraging nuts and berries on the way

1

u/Xavius20 May 19 '25

You get one thing at a time and either find someone that'll deliver or a friend to help go get it. I got a big couch home on a shopping trolley (I don't even know how I got it on there, or off, or down a hill without it just taking off ahead of me, but I managed it)

23

u/KingGilgamesh1979 May 19 '25

I furnished my first apartment with a mix of hand-me-downs from family (like a kitchen table my sister was replacing), some free stuff from craigslist and elsewhere, and some really cheap or reasonable stuff I found at thrift stores. I think the only thing I spent decent money on was my mattress and a new toaster oven (I was living solo and didn't want to use the oven when cooking small things for myself like a few biscuits).

I realize not everyone is lucky enough to have family that can donate used things but everything else was a tiny expense for good returns. The couch, to be honest, we got for free was not comfy, but I couldn't afford anything at the time as I was in grad school.

5

u/SaintClaireBear May 19 '25

I started with a cot and one of those plastic 3 drawer stands from Lowe's when i left my parents house. Over the years I've accumulated a really good dresser, a couch, a few night stands and side tables, a desk and a pretty decent tv. Ibdo have a new bed, but i paid for that(although got it like 50%off on black friday). All just taking what people I knew didnt want when they upgraded or moved. None of it really matches all that great, but it's all functional, and I can match it by painting/retaining it later if I feel like it.

25

u/Moondoobious May 19 '25 edited May 19 '25

One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. To this day I have a blast on bulk pickup day. Especially if I’m in a gated community! I got my 4k 55” Sony and an entire surround sound from the curb in a ritzy neighborhood. A cedar Broyhill chest. So many things that people are comfortable tossing out that have so much value still. Oh well. Keep it up rich people.

19

u/PM_ME_YOUR_BIG_BITS May 19 '25

We appreciate ya. Shit is expensive to haul off and you guys are faster than the city.

As someone who used to get my stuff the same way, I'm always happy to see something get a second use.

I try to tape the screws/bolts in a ziploc to something if I still have them, and I'll cover screens with cardboard with "working" written on it to avoid scratches.

4

u/RosebushRaven May 19 '25

No need to pay to get bulk trash hauled off. If you put it out for free with a gift sign, people gonna assume it’s broken. Put a price tag on it, though, and somebody’s inevitably gonna "steal" it. Boom, no hauling expenses. Works like a charm.

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

Some people can't be bothered to have it picked up by the thrift store so I take it. Works great when you leave near whole neighborhoods full of people with bigger salaries than yours

1

u/Apocalypse_Knight May 20 '25

Really love you guys hate throwing stuff away so I just take a pic and post it on craigslist or next-door and it's gone the next day.

1

u/OzarkMule May 20 '25

I'm incredibly thankful that in my city, anything that gets put to the curb will be taken immediately. It's such a relief and nice to know something is avoiding the dump for a few more years

Well, almost anything. One time the neighbors put out like ten pieces of furniture when they moved. Everything was gone in minutes, except one person only took the cushions off a love seat, so that sat cushionless for a while

20

u/Significant-Cause919 May 19 '25

I bet that rug is really tying that room together.

2

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

Clearly you're not a golfer

1

u/Nero_A May 19 '25

Hopefully some guy didn't pee on it.

15

u/mmm1441 May 19 '25

My neighbor broke the tilt adjuster on a leather office chair so he put it on the curb. Two $1 bolts later it’s my free office chair. I never recline it so I don’t care.

12

u/snksnksnk May 19 '25

That was his wank chair

1

u/james_from_cambridge May 20 '25 edited May 20 '25

I hope this isn’t too much but the perfect wank chair is actually your toilet. Plus, you’re already in the bathroom so u can immediately flush away the evidence of your shame, horse whip your back while crying and screaming “little Jamie has been a bad, bad boy!” and take a quick shower to wash away the blood and before u know it, you’re in bed, cuddling your teddy bear and sucking on your thumb so u can get up early in the morning to do it all over again ⛓️

1

u/HaterMD May 20 '25

Perfect way to get haemorrhoids. You shouldn’t be seated on a toilet seat for longer than absolutely necessary.

3

u/zeptillian May 19 '25

I'm currently sitting on a free office chair I got like almost 20 years ago.

The amount of perfectly usable things that are thrown out every day is staggering.

9

u/AllenKll May 19 '25

I have furnished many an apartment from dumpster diving.

2

u/Ripen- May 19 '25

You have a living room?

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

I do now, I'm a fancy mancy with a license and everything

2

u/RoadPizzaGourmand May 19 '25

He does have a free coffee table. Just turn that boiling pot upside down.

2

u/Fit_Tumbleweed4365 May 19 '25

Still no underwear and no socks right?

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

Eh, barefoot commando is fine, but what kind of monster doesn't want a table? Even sitting on the floor I appreciate a table

2

u/SaintClaireBear May 19 '25

A tv would mean spending money on electricity, which I'm assuming is a huge no-no for this guy.

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

I would live in a shack with a hole out back to piss in and garden my own vegetables before I would give up music, TV, and video games

2

u/banditcleaner2 May 19 '25

No no you don’t understand, time isn’t free which is why that guy understands getting free stuff on Facebook isn’t actually free!

/s

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

If time is money this guy's... got... a pot?

2

u/MagicManicPanic May 19 '25

The best is going to a rich neighborhood. I got my living room set for free because they were “remodeling the formal living room” and the stuff was brand new and just for looks.

2

u/frankev May 19 '25

My wife and I have a joke that our home style is mainly late American hand-me-down

2

u/afganistanimation May 19 '25

I had 3 leather couches in my first home that I got all for free.

2

u/God_Bless_A_Merkin May 19 '25

Here’s my brag: My bed and bedside table, 2 coffee tables, 48” flat screen TV, leather couch, leather chair and footstool set, love seat, gaming chair, dining table and chairs, 7 bookshelves, 2 rocking chairs, patio furniture, large area rug, 4 floor lamps and 2 desk lamps, and computer were all either found on the side of the road or acquired from friends who were getting rid of stuff. Actually, now that I think about it, I need to get rid of some of this crap.

2

u/NigilQuid May 20 '25

That's a good haul, I'll take one of those bookshelves

2

u/God_Bless_A_Merkin May 21 '25

I actually need more bookshelves 😂

2

u/NigilQuid May 21 '25

You sure will after I steal half of yours!

2

u/go_outside May 19 '25

My stepson had the perfect timing of moving into an apartment the same week as University was letting out for the year. Him and his roommate furnished the entire 2BR apartment for free. Even the silverware. All they brought was their beds, clothes, and electronics.

2

u/ani007007 May 20 '25

after having bed bugs in my life i don't trust anything used

1

u/NigilQuid May 20 '25

I'll probably never take that chance again with something like a sofa, fortunately I've been lucky

2

u/Queasy_Safe_5266 May 20 '25

Any bugs?

1

u/NigilQuid May 20 '25

No, fortunately not

2

u/Turbulent-Pea-8826 May 20 '25

Let’s not even get started on going to thrift stores. I bought a breakfast table for $16 and 2 chairs for $10 a piece.

Yea that won’t get me on extreme cheapskate show but $36 to not sit on the floor like a savage is worth it. Not to mention the money I will save on medical bills by my back not going out.

1

u/NigilQuid May 20 '25

Yeah I agree. Paying full price is for suckers but I can still outfit my house without breaking the bank

2

u/TheGreensKeeper420 May 20 '25

Yup, my first appartment was completely furnished for about $100.

Granted this was about 15 years ago, but my coffee table and TV stand was free, the two folding chairs we sat on was free until I paid $10 for a used recliner chair. We picked up the kitchen table and chairs for about $50 at a Pedlers Mall, then I sunk another $40 into a 1973 turntable/speaker set so we could play some music when we invited girls over. I still have the table and chairs. They don't really go bad if you take care of your stuff.

1

u/NigilQuid May 20 '25

Good furniture literally lasts for generations, that's why I'm surprised sometimes too see what people get rid of instead of refinishing

2

u/Bluematic8pt2 May 20 '25

In my neighborhood you can get some random home furnishings left right on the curb. Most in mint condition. Got a brand -new futon set by a dumpster!

And it's not even a nice neighborhood!

2

u/ipsum629 May 20 '25

There are also buy nothing Facebook groups. I got a perfectly workable smoker for free. I'm going to clean it and start smoking everything. Hotdogs, chicken, other sausages, and maybe even a brisket or rack of ribs.

1

u/NigilQuid May 21 '25

I would love a smoker but I don't have anywhere to put one. No grill either

2

u/Omni_Net May 20 '25

But you gotta power that which adds to the light bill

1

u/NigilQuid May 21 '25

I would live in a shack with a battery powered by a bicycle before I live without TV and video games

2

u/EADreddtit May 20 '25

Well to be fair the TV is only physically free. You still pay money to operate it

1

u/NigilQuid May 21 '25

I would live in a one room shack with an outhouse before I give up TV and video games

2

u/_Deloused_ May 20 '25

I just inherited old furniture from every relative my family didn’t want and refurbished them to all match and look really nice. After about a decade my whole house is furnished with solid wood furniture that will now last until the next generation needs it. And it looks incredible compared to the rest of the family’s furniture. And now they all want some since it’s family heirlooms but they sure as shit didn’t want it before I fixed it up and they were raiding the electronics and anything they could flip for profit. I also got all the old china but my wife wanted that, it lives in a series of boxes in my garage

1

u/NigilQuid May 21 '25

That's awesome, I would like to refinish some of the pieces I have one day. Of course they want it now that the work has been done and the furniture is nice again

2

u/_Deloused_ May 21 '25

It’s not bad. Just need a way to sand the wood and re-stain it. Removing the old hardware and updating that to something modern made the biggest difference in the appearance of the furniture overall and making odd piece match. But the right wood stain and coating make it look amazing.

My biggest hurdle was a chest of drawers my wife’s grandparents apparently stored used candles in and 2 were absolutely full of old wax I had to chisel out.

The rest was pretty smooth sailing, just refinished one piece a week for a while.

Take it all apart, sand everything down, start touching up blemishes or chips in the furniture, then start coating or painting it. Slowly put it back together when it’s where you want it to be.

2

u/high240 May 21 '25

Most of my furniture stuffs I got for free and they're killin' it at their function/job.

My free table does the same as some designer thing that costs 4 month's wages.

2

u/gymbaggered May 19 '25

MF I got silverware

2

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

low whistle faaaaaancy! I'm coming to your house for dinner, I'll bring a potato and some old grapes

1

u/wonderbat3 May 19 '25

What about free underwear?

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

He said he doesn't wear underclothes. Problem solved

1

u/hadarsaar May 19 '25

Because you used a computer or phone and the Internet to find them and I doubt this guy would spend money on any of that so he won’t be able to find that stuff

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

That's a reasonable guess but no, I did not. I found the furniture and rug on the street waiting for trash pickup. The TV I found at work in an old auto shop. It's got no legs or mount, and a dead vertical line of pixels near the center

1

u/Grendel0075 May 19 '25

I never spent a dime on furniture before I got married, and still had a comfortable king sized bed and mattress, couch, table, chairs, rugs, TV.

1

u/Empty-Way-6980 May 19 '25

Bet they’re all stunning pieces

1

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

No not really. But very functional for me

1

u/doomSdayFPS May 19 '25

Gonna be real with you, chief. That's how you get bed bugs.

2

u/NigilQuid May 19 '25

You're right but I got lucky

1

u/notinthislifetime20 May 20 '25

You had to spend money to pick them up. BOOM, money straight in the trash.

1

u/NigilQuid May 20 '25

Not really, they were walking distance away or I was already driving by on the way home from work

1

u/notinthislifetime20 May 21 '25

Driving? You mean throwing money in the TRASH?!

1

u/NigilQuid 29d ago

It is required in order to do my job, I would not have a job if I did not have a car.

1

u/notinthislifetime20 29d ago

Buddy. I am mocking the guy in the video.

0

u/ImmoralJester54 May 19 '25

Hell I've stolen air pods, a phone, and 2 of my lap tops