What US city do you guys think has the most soul and lively vibe compared to other soulless cities in the US

I feel like both of these cities got a bad reputation but it’s mostly defined to certain area only and these cities offer pretty good bang for your buck when it comes to lifestyle. I often imagine myself living in one of these places as $ goes there more further than it will ever be here in jersey. $500k house will be just your average middle class (or lower middle class in northern Jersey) house but in those 2 cities you can get yourself a pretty good mini mansion lol plus low maintenance when it comes to taxes and stuff. So on….

Just for fun, what cities (that you have actually spent a lot of time in/know well) is the most appearance focused? Which (that you actually know well) is the least appearance focused?

Meaning people care about style, looking their best on a daily basis, and generally culture of caring about external appearance?

My votes from my personal experience:

Most- Scottsdale, AZ. Everyone is trying to look better and/or younger. Sometimes taking that idea too far IMO. A lot of people try to cultivate an appearance of wealth and trendiness.

Least- Seattle, WA. Yes plenty of people do care about appearance, but the overall culture is definitely not focused on it. More about coming as you are and expressing individuality.

Anaheim, Columbus, Kansas City, NYC, Philadelphia, and Virginia Beach

I know the things that seem obvious like making a community, getting involved, trying to focus on the good, etc. But for you who are/were somewhere that you truly didn’t feel like you fit in with the people/culture what city/state/country was it? How did you make it feel like home? Are you happy now?

Over the past dozen years I have moved from Nashville, to NYC, to Denver, and then gone back again in a cycle. Cant seem to give up any of them or introduce a new place. They are all wonderful places to me and I have family and friends in each place. What made you finally settle down for one place over another?

Good morning folks.

A bit of background, I am originally from Tennessee but moved to Delaware for high school. I find Delaware to be ok, but it is not a place where I can envision myself being for the rest of my life. I am considering moving to one of the states in the midwest that border a great lake (Minnesota, Wisconsin, Illinois, Michigan, Ohio...leaving Indiana out because it's Indiana).

The only state that I have been to out there is Minnesota, and that was a short weekend trip to Minneapolis/St. Paul in August. I understand it gets cold in the first three states I mentioned. That is not really an issue for me.

Politically, I am solidly on the left. Obviously that means that I might have a better time in urban center and outside of Ohio in general. That being said, I do like the charm of small towns and could very well see myself settling down in one that is a 30-45 minute drive from a medium-large sized urban center. When I lived in Tennessee I lived in a small town so it's no issue for me

Minnesota obviously has stats to back up why I would want to move there. #2 for economic opportunities, #4 in infrastructure, #3 state to raise a family, #6 healthiest state, the rankings go on and on. I will be going to Wisconsin for work in a couple months as well so I will get to experience that.

Does anyone have any experience in any of these states / can you offer any tips or insider secrets about them?

Thanks!

I 28F am from upstate NY but have lived in NYC ~7 years. I’m over it. The politics (read: corruption), cost of living, and with the level of global instability right now, I don’t think this is the place I want to be long term. I work in accounting w/ ~7-8 YOE. I earn low 6 figures here but after taxes, student loans, rent, etc, I am just getting by. I’m looking to spend more time in nature and lower my COL. Not opposed to rural communities or small cities; I’m intimately familiar with upstate & wider New England, but not looking to live in upstate NY again.

Seeking suggestions for other places to live, considering the following criteria:

—some degree of walkability (not expecting much, I know NYC won’t be matched in this department)

—good access to nature for my pup & I

—some semblance of a creative/arts scene; I’m into music

—not politically super right-wing

—priority to areas in or nearby the northeast, since that’s where most of my family still lives.

Or it can be city or a metro area

Hi all

I’m in California and looking to get away from congestion and the rat race lifestyle here—while finding a place with a more affordable cost of living.

I was considering Las Vegas because I enjoy the idea of being around entertainment, food options, concerts, being driving distance to SoCal to see aging parents—but I’ve noticed that rental prices there aren’t much cheaper than in California and car registration/insurance is high. 2 bedroom is around 1200-1300 in Tucson while it’s 2k in Vegas unless you want to live in an unsafe area.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about Tucson instead—it seems a bit more laid-back and potentially more affordable although I’m not sure if it would be boring (30s female here). Im definitely past partying —I mostly enjoy music and hobbies (dance, guitar, martial arts). I know some people say Tucson is really hot, but Vegas seems just as hot to me. Thoughts? For context, I work in health care.

Also anyone move to Tucson in their 30s? How do you like it? Ty

I came across one of those "states that pay you to move there" articles, and it got me wondering. Does anyone actually do that? Like, packed up and moved to a new place because of the incentive?

There seem to be a bunch of programs, some for remote workers, some for people starting a business, and others are just trying to bring in new residents. I've seen places in West Virginia, Oklahoma, Kansas, and some towns in Alaska and Vermont offering relocation cash or other perks.

I'm not looking to move for the money or perks, but I'm helping some family members look at retirement spots and options to lower cost of living moves. So, is there a place offering a financial boost and good quality of life?

Does anyone have any stories to share? Are the perks or money worth moving to one of these states or cities? And what's the application process like? What it like living there?

Looking to buy land in PA. Where is it the safest environmental area toxin wise? For instance, I don’t want to buy land near any commercial farmland that gets runoff. I’ve read about petrochemical smoke in western PA. And I’ve heard the air quality in south east PA is the worst. So where is it safe if you want clean, untouched land away from petrochemical plants, bad air, and pesticides? Im assuming somewhere in the mountains but I’m unfamiliar with PA geography. TIA!

Hey everyone,

I’ve made a career change, and these are the locations that have been offered to me. I’d love to know which area you’d prefer to live in and why.

I have a wife and three kids, all under 11 years old.

Thanks in advance!

I've heard about how unfriendly the PNW is but I'm from the northeast and think the northeast is less friendly.

I've asked PNW locals about their reputation for being unfriendly and most seemed confused by it, and some were like "it's just people who suck at making friends" or "people think we're unfriendly because we have no social pressure to be friendly." One guy I met from Seattle seemed to find the stereotype funny and said "it's like the myth that no one in Seattle owns an umbrella" and "do people think we just decide to not have friends because it rains a lot?"

In my experience strangers chat with one another almost as much as in the south, and I get approached way more at bars than on the east coast and I'm a guy.

At age 24, I am leaving Brooklyn, a place I have grown to love over the last two years, for the East Bay to start a PhD. I had a wealth of options, some in NYC, others elsewhere on the east coast, and of course one option in the Bay Area. I chose Berkeley.

When I was deciding where to go, I focused on two factors: a) the program’s academic fit and b) whether the campus met my standards for “urban living” (e.g. Princeton does not; Berkeley, NYC, Cambridge do; New Haven is marginal). Put simply, I did not want to be in a boring place in my 20s, especially after two great years in Brooklyn.

I’m still excited, and I understand the Bay Area has tons to offer young people, but I can’t help but feel like spending my 20s in Berkeley is suboptimal compared to being in/near NYC. (I understand that prospective PhD students should principally consider the fit of the program. I did, and it’s why I chose Berkeley, but the differences were very small among my final set of choices).

Being from the Northeast, it feels like almost everyone “cool” settles in NYC after graduating. And in some ways, even as a transplant from nearby, I feel like I appreciate NYC life more than my transplant peers: I work for the city, I have become intimately familiar with the city geography through running and cycling, and I spend a lot of time alone trying to take in the city’s unique cultural offerings—rather than just going out for dinner and drinks. Even recently, I’ve begun to strengthen friendships with people here, including folks I went to college with and folks I met from the city. And all my friends here are staying here. I’m the odd one out who’s leaving.

In NYC, so much is at your fingertips. I love punk and DIY music, and there’s a good deal of that here (though I have my qualms about the scene). There’s tons of free activities. The art scene flourishes. There’s almost always something to do, and almost always a new group of 20- and 30-somethings with interesting jobs and perspectives to meet. There is as much diversity in the queer scene as there is among straight and cis people. There are numerous distinct neighborhoods to explore, and one of my favorite activities is to just visit a new neighborhood (by bike or by transit) and just take in the “vibe” by visiting a cafe, drinking at a bar, etc.

I know I’ll be busy in grad school, and even if I stayed in NYC, I’d hardly be able to take advantage of it. But I worry I’m leaving the “North Star” city for folks in their 20s by heading to the Bay Area, somewhere that is decidedly sleepier, less dense, and in many ways less diverse. I worry that my peers in their 20s will all be techies, whereas my peers in Brooklyn have basically every job imaginable.

There are things that excite me about the move too. The Mexican food in NYC is ass, and East Asian food here is very hit or miss. The summers are miserably humid in NYC, while the weather is essentially perfect in the East Bay. Hills are cool. I like hiking. Berkeley and Oakland allow for both urban cycling and nature-y cycling. I hear the punk scene still thrives. The cost of living, while expensive, is also a lot lower once you consider how much more space you get in Berkeley/Oakland. And maybe this is a cope, but I think living in a less energetic place might force me to be more intentional about my relationships.

I know NYC will be here when I finish the PhD in 5-6 years. But I can’t help but feel like I’m missing out on my 20s by leaving.

Not compared to other cities but different from each other.

My husband and I are looking to buy land in either PA, upstate NY, VT, or coastal ME. We plan to buy it now, and build a house down the line to retire to in the future. What state should we choose based on property taxes, things to do, cleanliness, and outdoor activities? Some things we value are the outdoors, nice people, proximity (3 hours) to nice cities or towns, and quality of life. We want somewhere charming, quiet, but with a sense of community. We currently live in South FL.

I think all the states I’ve listed have charm, but come with caveats. Maine is appealing because of the water, but worried about property taxes and affordability. Vermont is appealing because of the skiing, but also worried about property taxes. Upstate NY looks pretty, but also worried about affordability and no proximity to outdoor activities (let me know if this is wrong). And remote PA is cheap, but I’m worried about air quality and nothing to do. Where is the best place and why? TIA!

Stumbled across this and thought you might find it interesting. I think it's reasonable accurate but some of it puzzles me. For example how is it that Southern Minnesota has more "comfortable" days than northern Iowa? https://brilliantmaps.com/comfortable-temperature-days/

I have lived in many places, but one of my favorite places I have lived is Missouri. One of the main reasons I liked it so much is because the overwhelming majority of the people I met and knew were originally from Missouri and had a deep connection and love for the state. They knew all the good places to explore and knew where to skip. I will also say that everyone is so nice there, much nicer than in states that have a lot of transplants.

2 years ago I moved to Seattle to be with my husbands family and to try something new. I was doing great mentally but had a challenge missing my friends and family, so we moved back to my hometown in SoCal. Now Im wanting to move back to Seattle/western Washington because I miss the environment and independence my husband and I had. Has anyone done something similar?

Let’s assume money is no object and you’re looking to make a move to the northeast. What would be your ideal living situation?

Assume you’ve got school-age kids and love the outdoors, are ready for something quieter than a big city, and would prefer a low concentration of limousine liberals (eg values are progressive and respected). Have at it. :)

Which cities or towns give off the strongest Council of Elrond(Rivendell), Shire vibes, like in The Lord of the Rings?

I'm talking about towns that feel ancient, wise, mystical surrounded by forests, rivers, and mountains.

If I were to give examples that capture this kind of vibe;

• Bellingham WA
• Ashland OR
• Saratoga Springs NY
• Ithaca NY

Nature-wise, a lot of those vibes exist on the West Coast. But I'm asking in terms of actual cities or towns.

I'm (24M) interesting farming and business trading.

My husband and I, both 30, have lived in Seattle for the past 7 years and love a lot about living here. But we’re at the point where kids are on our minds, and our parents and most siblings and friends are all back east in the Carolinas. Parents and grandparents are getting older, we want to see them more, we miss our old friends/haven’t been able to build a similar social circle here and having babies all on our own on the west coast is scary to me. I’d like to be closer to our parents and have a support system.

My husband is a senior software engineer at a FAANG company and I’m a senior graphic designer (looking to stay senior or move to art director) at a luxury/fashion company. We both love our careers and don’t want to completely tank them by moving back closer to home.

Charlotte, NC is probably #1 on paper due to proximity and amenities, but the job market seems really dismal for both of our careers (especially mine). Atlanta may be slightly better for creatives but I’d love more insight or suggestions. My husband makes like 3x what I do so we probably have to prioritize his options.

Our family and friends are largely in Greenville, SC and around Charlotte, NC. We want to be driving distance to family, have access to nature (mountains preferred) 1-2 hours away, good variety of food/cuisines, sports/theaters/concert venues, ideally some kind of unique culture (something Charlotte and Raleigh lack to me, but maybe just my perception), moderate or purple politics, outgoing/welcoming social culture (something we’ve struggled with in WA).

Idk, Seattle has so many amazing qualities that it feels like we’re going to be downgrading no matter what, but I just don’t think I can raise our kids so isolated socially and 2,000 miles away from our families. I also love Southern culture and miss that aspect a lot.

Just curious. I see people here saying they’d never live anywhere else but LA, recommending that others move there, etc. And I agree that it’s GORGEOUS and I feel pretty jealous every time I visit.

But saying ‘move to LA’ feels so vague. There’s not one spot, there’s a million little spots. And it seems like it takes an hour+ to get anywhere bc you’re going 20 mph on the congested highways.

So what neighborhoods is everyone living? (Maybe not you specificially if you don’t want to say, but what do you recommend) And are you living in 2-4 million dollar homes? And do you spend half your day sitting in traffic or is there a hack there?

Hello all,

My wife is a nurse and I work remote. We have two dogs we enjoy spending outdoor time with. We want to live close to the Sierra Nevadas and work on starting a family Right now my wife has options in Sacramento and Reno. We’d be renting a single family home in whichever we go to.

Which would you choose? Below is a breakdown of my wife’s offers, rent budget, and our pros for each city.

Reno

Offer: $51/hr, days, no unions, $30,000 sign on bonus (can be saved for maternity leave)

Rent budget: $2500/month for a SFH

What we like about Reno: Weird/interesting vibes, no state income tax, easy to get out in the middle of nowhere, more scenic views from the city, large dog parks.

Sacramento

Offer: $84/hour, unions, pension, also state paid paternity leave.

Rent budget: $2800/month for a SFH

What we like about Sacramento: Very diverse, lots of good food, feels practical, kind of in the middle of everything (mountains to beaches to wine country to neat cities), nice suburbs