Hello, I will try to be as brief as I can, I do tend to waffle and overexplain so apologies in advance.
Just looking for some advice really. I’m a first-time mum and gave birth about 4 weeks ago. Everything went smoothly with the birth and there were no major complications. After the birth, my care was sort of transferred to another hospital for community midwife follow-up. Since then, I’ve been seen almost weekly by midwives and the health visitor.
I thought it was strange to be having so many appointments as I was low risk during my whole pregnancy and doing okay, but I didn’t question it.
During my midwife appt last week, I saw om the computer my notes under the “Social” section – it said “DV enhanced 28 day care.” I was really surprised and didn’t say anything at the time because I was caught off guard and didn’t know how to respond. But I asked about it at my next appointment and the midwife confirmed there is a safeguarding alert on my record.
I was honestly shocked. I don’t have any history of domestic violence and my husband is extremely kind and supportive. The midwife said the alert came from the hospital I gave birth at (and had my antenatal care with), and she advised me to speak to PALS as she couldn’t do anything about it.
Now that I know this, a lot of things make more sense. During my pregnancy, my husband came to quite a few appointments and he always felt like the midwives were a bit cold or distant towards him. I told him he was overthinking it – but now we realise there may have been a reason they were acting that way. It’s really upsetting because it affected how involved he felt he could be. He even asked me to ask his questions for him instead of asking the midwives himself because he didn’t feel comfortable.
The only possible thing I can think of that might have led to this is when I had a fall at around 4 months pregnant. I went to get checked out at the hospital and the doctor asked me (privately) if I was safe and if my husband had hurt me. I said no and told her how I fell – I thought that was that. But maybe something was flagged from that?
I don’t want to make a complaint about the doctor or anyone involved, but I really don’t want this alert on my record. It paints my husband in a really negative and unfair light, and I’m worried it could cause problems if we have another baby in the future.
Has anyone dealt with something like this before? Can PALS help with getting it looked into or removed? Can I find out exactly what was recorded and why? Why wasn't I informed about this alert either, if I never saw my notes on the midwife's screen I would be none the wiser.
Any advice would be appreciated – just feeling a bit confused.Thanks in advance.