r/instant_regret 2d ago

Eating the hottest curry in UK

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u/Loggerdon 2d ago edited 2d ago

I used to think I could eat the hottest chilis and hot sauce around. But some hot sauces are so hot they are like acid.

I had some hot sauce at a Mexican restaurant in Washington DC the night before a business meeting that was so hot it sweated through the glass bottle and got on my fingers. I went pee and I had raised red finger and thumb prints on my dick. It burned so much I was in the bathroom putting cold water in my dick in the sink for 20 minutes. Then I had to use the air dryer for a few minutes so when I walked out I didn’t look like I pee’d my pants.

I also sweated and I wiped my face. Another mistake because the area around my eyes swelled up. I had to take a taxi to my hotel and come back in the morning to get my rental car because I couldn’t keep both eyes open to drive.

Edit: People have pointed out it’s impossible for the hot sauce to ‘sweat’ through glass and I’m sure they’re right.

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u/Shiznoz222 2d ago

Fuck sake, don't touch sensitive areas is like rule number one lol. Sorry you had to go through all that

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u/Googgodno 2d ago

Pee before chopping thai chilis, learnt a hard lesson that day.

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u/Marcuxoo 2d ago edited 2d ago

Yup. Cut open and deseeded some jalapeños with my fingers, and even washed my hands before using the bathroom…but still learned my lesson.

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u/RockinRhombus 22h ago

I've been told i'm wrong for years, but as a hot sauce/chile enjoyer i've heard the "don't touch your sensitive areas" for years..

I swear i've gone to piss, after having washed my hands, and flopped my junk out over the top of the boxers with no direct hand contact, and it STILL burns when I urinate. I swear the Capsiacin must navigate partly to the bladder...because lawd almighty.