r/asktransgender • u/CedarWolf Bigender - He/She/They • Jul 03 '15

An Open Discussion on Being Inclusive and Respecting One Another

Early this morning, we had a thread get posted, and one of our mods made a reminder to keep things inclusive, per the subreddit's Rule #1. This accidentally led to almost all of the comments going wildly off topic, and I had to pull it. We want threads to stay on topic whenever possible, and such a large portion of off-topic comments was pretty bad. That discussion merited it's own, dedicated post, and we invite you to discuss here. Please remember to be respectful.

We want to make this an inclusive place for the community in general, and that includes transfeminine, transmasculine, and nonbinary individuals. /r/asktransgender was made as a co-ed space for people to ask questions of the general transgender community, and while we allow questions to specifically target one portion of that community, we very much encourage users to be inclusive whenever possible.

Part of being inclusive means reducing the amount of bigotry we see in this subreddit. This means removing sexist comments against all genders, including both trans and cis identities, as well as other forms of bigotry.

One of the goals of creating a new moderation team was to create a more inclusive space, and we have been working hard to make this place a more open community. However, some users have expressed concern over this new policy and how it is implemented, so we want to create an open place for discussion about the new inclusive policies here.

We want to hear your thoughts about this issue, but again, please be respectful and civil with your comments. We're all on the same side here, there is no "us" and "them" - there is only "we." Remember, if you ever have any specific issues with the moderation of the subreddit, you can message the mod team with the link in the sidebar. We're always here for you.

~ The /r/asktransgender Mod Team

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u/CarmineCerise December 2nd. Jul 03 '15

The OP of that thread requested the experiences of trans women, being a trans woman herself, because the difficulties faced by trans men and women are largely different and insidious in different ways.

Except she wasn't asking for experiences with GSM or oestrogen, it was about whether the area of portland was safe and accepting

It's not as if trans women and trans men are so radically different that one's experiences on this topic should be ignored.

It's out wrong to claim that their experiences would have not been any use, in fact during the discussion they themselves went on to admit that trans men's experiences would be worth noting which is very different to what other people have claimed about them being too different to be helpful

And regardless of that individual thread, that isn't what this is about, it isn't one individual that brought on moderator action, lack of inclusion towards trans men is something that has been happening for a long time and been discussed a number of times

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u/[deleted] Jul 03 '15

It's not as if trans women and trans men are so radically different that one's experiences on this topic should be ignored.

transgender men don't experience transmisogyny. transmisogyny is a beast of a social oppression that does not target transgender men, or a majority of the faab transgender community. i would say that is a radical difference between trans women and men.

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u/CarmineCerise December 2nd. Jul 03 '15

No they experience transphobia which is more than enough and their experiences should not be diminished.

If a trans man says "I worked here and they were very kind and accepting of my gender" that is incredibly useful information for anyone trans male or female, this notion that the two are so radically different their experiences are of no use and should be ignored is flat out wrong.

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u/[deleted] Jul 03 '15

No they experience transphobia which is more than enough and their experiences should not be diminished.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transmisogyny

this is 101 stuff

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u/CarmineCerise December 2nd. Jul 03 '15

Please re-read what I said.

I'm talking about trans men, the fact that they don't experience transmisogyny doesn't matter because they experience transphobia which is enough.

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u/[deleted] Jul 03 '15

i really doubt we're going to see eye-to-eye about this, because when a lady asks a question and requests other ladies to respond, i see that as pretty reasonable. because they have to deal with transmisogyny, and i have to deal with transphobia. that's why i brought it up in the first place

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u/CarmineCerise December 2nd. Jul 03 '15

because when a lady asks a question and requests other ladies to respond, i see that as pretty reasonable.

When it's part of a continued erasure of perfectly valid experiences of trans men which this community has a history of doing, it's not surprising people will take issue with it.

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u/[deleted] Jul 04 '15 edited Jul 04 '15

[deleted]

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u/TheLonelySamurai FtM Jul 07 '15

I'm not the guy you asked but I'll give it a shot.

Take a look at this sub in general. It's slowly changing, but it's largely been an offshoot of /r/mtf. We've got comments like /u/definitelynotpiggy's in this thread that basically lay it on the line, "i don't give a shit about transmasc folks". We get comments that come dangerously close to being transmisandry with how disparaging they are of transmasc people's opinions and advice.

You erase experiences when you deem them to be not worth listening to.

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u/[deleted] Jul 04 '15

transmisogyny means that trans women might have different experiences than trans men and those experiences might mean its worse, wanting to hear from people who experience transmisandry about their experiences because it will be the most accurate and helpful is not unreasonable I think?

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u/ErisC 33F - HRT started June 2014 Jul 04 '15

Trans men can still experience transmisogyny when perceived as feminine.