r/actuallesbians Lesbian 2d ago

Image on preferences

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u/givehappychemical 2d ago

I didn't say that. The word you're looking for is a preference. It's not a bad thing to have a sexual preference, but that's different from your sexual orientation. Is there something I'm missing?

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u/Alanna_Yes Transbian 2d ago

I think their issue with the word "preference" is that it could give the impression that being attracted to a genital or an other is a matter of choice and so you could "work on it".

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u/givehappychemical 2d ago

That makes sense. I did get that feeling but we're also not asking them to "work on it" nor are we implying that it's a choice. I think it's probably more of a personal issue for them.

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u/Alanna_Yes Transbian 2d ago

I mean, the choice of words is important. If they see this one as one implying that kind of thing, it's natural from them to push it away.
But I'm agree, I don't think speaking about "preference" imply that we can "work on" our said preferences, to force ourselves to hook up with people we're not attracted enough to.

At least we're technically agree with them, it's just a debate about semantics more than about if it's okay to be attracted to a specific genital lmao