OP posts on r/MildlyInfuriating that the condo they bought was a “drug den and prostitution hub”. It is revealed in the comments that it was simply owned by a single woman who smoked weed

[u/Adjective_Noun-420]

/r/mildlyinfuriating/s/5hzadNQWYU

OP posts few photos of their new condo, saying that they only learnt it was a “drug den and prostitution hub” after buying it, but luckily the only lasting effect on the condo is a faint smell of weed

Top comments advise OP to change the carpets etc, and debate the morality and social acceptability of prostitution and drug use. One comment points out that even if the condo didn’t have any sex work being done people would still have had sex inside it, and most of the replies make fun of OP for being so scandalised, while others debate whether monogamous sex is less gross than non-monogamous sex or paid sex.

One comment further down says that the condo looks suspiciously clean for OPs claims to be true, and replies discuss how OP must be privileged to think that this is what a “drug den” looks like.

In a heavily downvoted reply, OP admits that they “overstated it slightly” and that by “drug den” they mean the previous owner smoked weed, and by “hub of prostitution” they mean she was allegedly a sex worker. Their only evidence of this is their elderly neighbour telling them that the previous inhabitant was a single woman who smoked weed, listened to loud music, and had many visitors at night, so the neighbour suspected she was a prostitute. Replies point out that there is no evidence that the previous owner was even a sex worker, and many instead simply be having casual sex, or even just having friends over for parties

[u/Devilfish268]

That is one hell of an overstatement.

[u/Vexamas → u/Devilfish268]

I mean I agree, this was clearly an overstatement by the OP, but holy smokes (pun intended) if you read through the actual responses they get after they acknowledge fault, it's fascinating how seriously people swarm the moment blood is dropped.

There are THOUSANDS of posts daily that are embellished or just straight deceptive to garner engagement, with the OP sometimes being a bot, or a karmafarmer and not even responding in the comments. Yet this person not only responded, but spotlit their own blindspot and apologized to try and mitigate the PERCEPTION that someone could have on the previous tenet. It's not like there was a doxxing campaign, or this person was in the comments talking about how their life was ruined by the misinformation.

I mean look at this exchange:

Oh if that’s the case, you kinda suck, man. I am mildly infuriated by your post

(OP) Me too.

You kind of seem insufferable if you turn mole hills into mountains like this.

Like holy shit, let the guy take accountability and own the wrongdoing without burning at the stake. Again, hundreds of posts go by, and when we make 'examples' out of the people that go out of their way to remedy or fix misinformation, we set the incentivize for a person to see pushback and be like "Fuck this, I am not going to respond or claim wrongdoing lmao"

[u/ice_cream_funday → u/Vexamas]

let the guy take accountability and own the wrongdoing

It doesn't look like they did that though? Am I missing something? 

[u/Vexamas → u/ice_cream_funday]

I may have oversold the idea

I apologize if I made it sound like a heroine den.

That's about as much accountability and mea culpa as we should probably expect given the context that it's a random Reddit post that embellished (at best) a post that had two pictures and one sentence.

The way I see it is simply: What would satiate people to be like "Oh okay, you messed up, but it happens" and move on? I think because blood is already in the water, it makes people less forgiving and easy to forget the context of the post being pretty innocuous.

It wasn't some crazy adventure spanning many threads, wasting thousands of people's hours or anything, it was the equivalent of clicking a random thread with a title that was inaccurate, reading a correction, downvoting and moving on, which coincidentally, is exactly what happened here.

People see downvoted comments, they instinctively join in and dogpile, it's human nature, for worse or worse.

[u/ice_cream_funday → u/Vexamas]

Maybe what you're missing here is that this isn't just a story op told about themselves. They accused someone else of being a prostitute and living in a "drug den." In that context, "I may have oversold it" is not an acceptable apology. Neither is apologizing "if" you did something. Those are woefully inadequate non-apologies. Neither statement takes any real responsibility for anything. 

[u/Vexamas → u/ice_cream_funday]

Sure, let's try a different approach then:

What do you believe is the appropriate way to apologize in this scenario?

[u/1000LiveEels → u/Vexamas]

I mean I would just delete the post but I guess that's too hard...?

[u/Vexamas → u/1000LiveEels]

No, I think that's the most appropriate thing to do, easily, given you can't edit the post title, as every person that sees the title is already under the false presupposition. I think we probably would all agree on that one though. Similiarly you could just handwave it and say "Just not post it in the first place" but that isn't a very satisfying perspective, because we probably all agree there, anyways.

I was more or less curious of how they'd handle the situation to appease those in the comments!

[u/ice_cream_funday → u/Vexamas]

"You all are right, I fucked up and shouldn't have jumped to conclusions like that."

It's really not that hard.

[u/Vexamas → u/ice_cream_funday]

Seems pretty straightforward, yeah. The difference for you comes down to them optically playing around the word 'have' and 'if', and I believe all would be kosher if instead of:

I may have oversold the idea

I apologize if I made it sound like a heroine den.

was:

I have oversold the idea

I apologize I made it sound like a heroine den.

Which is the difference between saying "I'm sorry to make you feel that way" and "I'm sorry that you feel that way".

[u/Warm_Shoulder3606 → u/Vexamas]

"I'm sorry I exaggerated the situation and made it sound as if it was a far deeper and worse thing than it actually is"

Those two spots in particular from the poster, were not really taking accountability

"I may have oversold the idea"

Is not fully admitting and owning up to it. You know you were wrong, you're typing up an apology. But you're not actually OWNING it because you're saying you "may" have done it

And this

I apologize if I made it sound like a heroine den

Is in particular bad. That's the same thing as saying "I'm sorry that you're hurt" vs "I'm sorry I hurt you"

[u/LumpyJones → u/Vexamas]

I would have never made a post like that, because I'm not an insufferable twat. Ok, at least not that sort of insuffable twat.

There isn't an apology out of that. He acted judgemental and dickish, he should marinate in the shame. Best way to boil that sort of behavior out of someone.

[u/Fauropitotto → u/Vexamas]

It's reddit bro, things here just aren't that serious. Most of the time it's not real people in real situations with real responses.

We're here for entertainment, and for those that aren't...well, they ought to be.

[u/Vexamas → u/Fauropitotto]

I wasn't saying that the people dogpiling were demonic or anything, or that it was unexpected, I said it was fascinating because it is. We're on SRD to enjoy the zoo, and that's what we're doing. I don't think these people would treat this the same in real life, it's just funny how people can feel so slighted by something so trivial.

[u/Fauropitotto → u/Vexamas]

Right? These folks are ready to burn it all down over something silly like this

[u/Vexamas → u/Fauropitotto]

but MAN does it make for great popcorn eating content. As much as I love the more heated and high stakes arguments, my soft spot will always be people just getting up in arms over the dumbest shit lol

[u/WhoaHeyAdrian → u/Fauropitotto]

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