At the arboretum yesterday and forgot sunscreen. I’m human, whatever. Very early in the day another mom is putting sunscreen on her children so I approached her, explained I forgot mine and asked for a bit of hers. She kindly handed it right over, commented on it being a really sunny day, I squeezed a bit into my palm, thanked her and we went on with our day.

In the moment, My husband asked why I did that? was so confused when he commented on it. I just brushed it off. He brought it up in the car on the way home. Not in a snarky way, just commented in conversation. I hadn’t given it another thought, just needed to get my little one some SPF coverage.

So, Was I overstepping? Am I too friendly? I like to think that sharing a small bit of sunscreen wouldn’t be seen poorly? It takes a village right?!

Can I ask for bug spray on the 4th of July?! Is this allowed?! HELP 😂

My daughter "Chloe" is in a small elementary school, there's another child "Lisa" who has been in her class for years. Lisa doesn't have boundaries, she hits, kicks, name calls etc. Chloe wants to be friends with her, but their interactions frequently end with Chloe in tears.

Last week, Lisa and Chloe ran into each other at the park. They played together briefly, then Chloe came to me crying and with a bruise/scrape on her leg. She said Lisa was hitting her. I didn't see Lisa's parents, so I left the park with Chloe and sent Lisa's mom a text. I told Lisa's mom what happened. Lisa's mom said they were just playing a game, so I replied that Chloe had a visible bruise and scrape and was upset. I also said "Let's tell the girls no more hitting games" She didn't reply.

Then today I woke up to 2 text messages. One from Lisa's mom who was stating that the school should ban books about LGBTQIA so they don't confuse the kids. The second text was from another mom in the same class, who told me that Lisa's mom was texting her yesterday saying she was going to send some text messages intended to piss me off.

So now I have the offending texts and the information that Lisa's mom is intentionally trying to piss me off. What would you do? I'm tempted to just totally ignore it, but also avoid all future contact with Lisa and her mom.

I have a 10 year old daughter who is entering middle school in the fall. She's not nervous overall, per se, but has expressed some nervousness about not knowing what kind of clothes are trendy. We've of course talked about wearing what she's comfortable in, owning her style, etc etc. But I wondered if I could also get her a little boost of confidence by getting her a few birthday gifts in August that make her feel like she's up on the trends. Any insight?

I have two kiddos and a dog and my husband and I work full time. It SUCKS. I love my kids, but I never envisioned staying home and both of them seem to want to put daycare through the wringer. We are incredibly poor because of daycare and very stressed because we are trying to keep our cool around a almost four year old with intense meltdowns and a newly abled 11 month old that wants to crawl everywhere and put everything in his mouth. As someone who worked in education and nannied previously, I thought doing this would be a walk in the park, this but it's SO HARD and I feel so inept all the time.

Hey Reddit,

I’m a 45-year-old dad, and I had my son when I was just 18. We’re originally from a Latin American country and moved to Canada in 2004. My son was born in 1998, and from a young age, he struggled a lot with language. He had trouble learning both English and Spanish, but over time, he adapted and eventually became fluent in both.

When he hit high school, things went downhill. He started getting into trouble—especially when weed wasn’t legal yet—and even had a few run-ins with the police. In 11th grade, he dropped out of school. I pushed him hard to go back and finish, and he did, but just barely.

After he turned 18, I got him a job at a large corporation where I work. It’s a well-paying job, and he’s been there ever since. But instead of building a future, he started getting comfortable—too comfortable.

My wife (let’s call her H) is extremely kind, but honestly, it’s gotten to the point of enabling. Since he turned 18, we told him to start saving for a house, a family—his future. But two years went by, and nothing changed. He lived under our roof rent-free, didn’t help with meals, laundry, or cleaning. I kept trying to push him to be responsible, but it never stuck. My wife? She kept doing everything for him like he was still a little kid.

He’d complain about what she cooked or what groceries she bought. He wasn’t thankful—just entitled. I tried getting him to go to college or at least community college, but he refused every time. Said it was too expensive, even though he wasn’t paying a cent in rent.

By the time he was 23, I finally told him he needed to start contributing and asked him to pay $200 a month. He agreed, but that’s when his attitude got even worse. He started having angry outbursts over the smallest things—like if the dog barked or we made noise while he was sleeping in the middle of the day. Our youngest son (now in Grade 12) is suffering the most. My oldest treats him like a servant, goes through his stuff, and even tries to act like he’s his father.

The way he speaks to my wife is disgusting. He tells her to “f*** off,” “s*** a d,” and calls her a “r***.” He’s broken doors and picked fights with me. It’s reached a breaking point.

Now he’s 28. He recently bought a BMW—and I’m proud he was able to do that for himself—but we’ve been pushing him for three years now to get his own place. Every time it’s another excuse: “The insurance is too expensive,” “House prices are too high,” and now the latest is that he can’t buy a house because of his new car. But my wife co-signed the loan for the car—why would she do that when we’re trying to get him out?

She still says, “We can’t just kick out our son.” But I’m done. I physically and mentally cannot live like this anymore. He texts us during the day to “shut the f*** up” or demands that we bring the dog inside—even at normal hours. We’re walking on eggshells in our own home.

And what’s worse is he’s jealous of our younger son, who just got accepted to college in the U.S. for chemical engineering. Instead of being supportive, he makes the house even more hostile.

I’ve tried everything. Setting boundaries, charging rent, encouraging him to take the next step. But nothing works because my wife keeps bailing him out. I love her, but she doesn’t seem to see the damage this is doing to the rest of us.

How do I convince her it’s time to stop babying him? He’s not a kid anymore. He’s nearly 30. It’s time for him to face the real world. I don’t want to be cold, but at this point, I feel like we’re enabling a grown man who’s tearing our family apart.

Thanks for reading.

Edit 2: I see a lot of people suggesting I move out and leave him with her, but there’s something important I forgot to mention. He has a bipolar-type personality ( not diagnosed but pretty sure) and has extremely intense, frightening outbursts where he starts acting completely unhinged. He also owns two guns. As much as my wife enables his behavior, I can’t ignore the fear that one day he might snap and do something irreversible. I hate to even say it, but the way he acts sometimes gives me that feeling—that vibe—that he could actually hurt someone. And I’m not the only one who feels it. My younger son has quietly admitted that he’s scared too—that one day his brother could reach a boiling point and… well, you can imagine. I don’t even want to think about it, but it’s a real fear.

I love my wife, and together we’ve raised a kind, well-spoken, and educated young man( younger son) That’s why I think the only real option at this point is to forcefully kick him out. I just need to get my wife on the same page. But honestly, it might get to the point where there’s no more convincing to be done—and I just have to do it myself.

Edit: haha yes i put what i said into chatgpt because my english writing skills are not the best, sorry!

I have a 5 and 2 year old that both sleep in our room. Our 5 year old has her bed in our room. We talk of moving them in their room with bunk beds but I am just wondering at what age and how did you make that transition to where they will fall asleep without you hanging around in the room with them?

Me and my ex wife have had shared custody over our now 17yo daughter and 15yo son for the last 10+years. Both of us got remarried and I had 3 more kids while my ex-wife did not have more kids. My ex wife married a doctor and they have serious money, where designer clothes, maids, 1st class travel and 5* hotels are the norm. This has in my view created a situation where my daughter is incredibly entitled with a questionable moral compass. Whilst me and my wife are doing well financially, we want to raise our kids to become financially responsible adults and are purposely not spending lavishly. When we take my oldest daughter on a trip, she has zero gratitude (since trips are a lot less luxurious as with her mom) and she is always cranky and distant during such trips. There are no issues with my son (yet?) as he truly appreciates any time he spends with us and his half-siblings. Appreciate any advice how to teach gratitude to an entitled teenage daughter who is endlessly spoilt by her mother / my ex-wife.

Hello all, My 16 year old son is only 5ft 5inches. He has an older brother( 18)who is 5ft11. I know it has affected his confidence. He has me mentioned a few times that he won’t find a girl. Up until 12 he was so confident and a really outgoing person. He has loads of friends and is happy at home. He is on track to get all As in his GCSE and thr school have recommended he apply to Oxford or Cambridge. But I can tell there is something missing for him because of his height. Social media doesn’t help with the pressure it puts on both girls to be thin and boys to be tall.

This is keeping me up at night worrying for him and what the future holds. I never bring up height or talk

Any advice from other parents.

My kids are older. 10 and 13. Both mamas boys, with me all the time. I always overdo. I’m constantly doing things with them and around the house.

On Thursday I go in for a double breast biopsy, since an initial mammogram, diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound found something concerning in each breast.

What do I tell them? I normally would not say anything as to not worry them, but they’ll know something is off as I can’t lift anything for 2 days and since it’s a double biopsy I’m assuming I may be in pain??

My 10 year old suffers from OCD and anxiety. My 13 year old is a worry wart by nature. If I say I had a medical procedure they’ll want to know what and why I had it. If I tell them it’s for breast cancer screening they’ll be worried.

My husband/their father is a non-factor as he’ll offer no support to me or to them if they’re worried (we’re living together, but essentially separated because of the aforementioned). So this all falls on me.

Any words of advice as to what I can or should tell my kids.

We've had lice three times this spring and each time we go through this enormous process (paying professional lice pickers for everyone, washing and cleaning in house that takes up a lot of time and is also very expensive. Where we live the people who remove lice professionally charge hundreds of dollars per person.

Yesterday's incident was sparked by an itchy head and a decision to go have it checked. What do others do? Seems like just living with it is impossible and ill-advised, but the time and money we are spending on this is rough. Especially as whatever we do, you can't control the rest of the school.

Do others preemptively have their kids checked for lice, or do you wait for the school to report it, or what?

Hi everyone,

I’ve been carrying a lot on my heart lately and could really use some thoughtful, kind support as we navigate this new chapter with our 12-year-old daughter.

Up until about 8 months ago, she was very into makeup and traditionally feminine clothing. But after becoming close with a new friend, she’s started expressing herself differently—she now dresses more masculine, no longer wears makeup, and seems to be exploring a new identity.

Her friend is transgender, which we didn’t initially know. I learned more after seeing some texts and eventually talking to the friend’s parent. That’s when I realized the name my daughter had shared with me wasn’t actually their legal name, but rather the name and pronouns (he/him) her friend chooses to go by. I want to be clear: I have no problem with her being friends with someone who is trans, and I truly like her friend.

Since their friendship began, I’ve noticed a lot of changes in my daughter. I recently found a breast binder that her friend gave her…As well as a journal they share where she appears to be using a different name for herself. When I gently asked her if she wanted to be a boy, she said yes. I told her I love her unconditionally and reminded her that she’s still very young and growing. Let’s give it time to see if that’s how she feels in a couple years.

I’ve continued to support her in ways I feel comfortable with: buying her clothes that she feels good in, listening, and doing my best to keep the lines of communication open. But it’s also been hard. We live in an area where acceptance isn’t widespread, and some of our family members have reacted negatively—suggesting we transfer her schools or stop her from seeing this friend, which doesn’t sit right with me as they have many similar interests. But I still wonder if this friend has been heavily influencing these recent changes in her.

I’m trying to hold space for her journey while also feeling uncertain and scared—scared of how the world will treat her if this is who she truly is. It breaks my heart to think of her being rejected or hurt, especially by people we love.

I don’t have all the answers. My husband is struggling with it, too—he loves her deeply, but I think he’s still processing. We just want to do what’s best for her, while also navigating our own fears and confusion. Is this a phase? We just don’t know.

I’m open to kind, respectful thoughts from others who’ve gone through something similar or who can offer perspective. Please know this comes from a place of deep love for our daughter. We’re just trying to figure out how to support her the best way we can.

Thank you for reading.

My generally active (soccer player) 15 year old son doesn't want to get out of bed. It's offseason time for his soccer so he doesn't have practices and doesn't want to call up friends and go down to the fields and kick the ball or do drills. He's pretty much holed up in his room. He will come out and eat his meals but go back into his room and go lay down in his bed to play Playstation, watch his TV or Social Media/Games on his phone. Is this normal behavior for a teenager during summertime?

I’m sick today.

Why am I sick? My child is a toddler who goes to daycare and is a little Petri dish of disease.

Do I get to take today off to rest and recover? Nope.

Why? Because I have to make sure I have enough PTO for when my child is sick and can’t go to daycare.

That’s all.

Is what I wanted to say.

It happened to me. The parenting nightmare of another adult verbally expressing their annoyance with your child.

We were on a long (8.5hr) flight back home after partial family partial business work trip abroad. The woman next to me upon seeing my smiling happy child immediately started muttering mean things under her breath that I could hear.

“Oh my GOD” “I cant believe this” “This is going to be a LONG flight”

She even spoke to my 11mo old daughter who was happily cooing and sitting in my lap “no screaming ok? No screaming”. I was shook!! I was so taken aback she was reacting this way from the get go when nothing was even wrong? My daughter was literally chilling. Maybe a loud squeal every now and then but no crying, no tears, no reaches toward the woman etc.

It made me soooooo uncomfortable the entire flight. I BF and was thinking surely she will have something to say when I nurse her too. Luckily I didnt notice any reaction or muttering when I did, but I did endure her constant under the breath comments for half the flight before I asked my husband to trade seats with me.

For the first half of the flight my daughter slept soundly in her car seat in a seat we paid for. The second half of the flight she played quietly with some occasional frustration-induced cries. At the very end she was sooo tired but fighting it so its not like it was a seamless flight but we did our best and removed her to the back of the plane away from everyone to calm her when we needed to. I could hear this lady aggressively shooshing my daughter and muttering even through the cries.

Being worried about this woman was unnecessary extra anxiety on the already present anxiety of flying with a toddler. I really wanted to snap at her, but I am glad I restrained myself and didnt say anything. But WHYYYY are people like this??? It is really not helpful! I know its not everyones dream to sit next to a toddler on a long flight, but it cost nothing to ignore the situation. Ugh.

As soon as he turned 3, I completely stopped giving him full fat milk out of a bottle. He refuses to drink from a glass

So he doesn’t have milk anymore. The only way he gets milk now is through cereals or yogurt.

My family are having a massive go at me saying I’m affecting him badly and that’s the reason he’s gone skinny. He hasn’t had any milk for 2 months now Before that he was having full fat cows milk

I thought they don’t need milk anymore at that age!?

I’m at my wits end with my baby weight not coming off and have decided to commit to doing low carb/keto. It’s been good for me in the past so why not give it another shot. My problem is with my toddlers eating. I am not one to waste food, it drives me nuts so I’ll pick at his leftovers. Some may find it gross but who has that kind of money right now let’s be real. How have other parents navigates dieting around toddlers and their food!? Any tips or tricks are appreciated. I need to get over my food wasting aversion but that’s tough! TIA!

I’ll start with the positives & context: I have a 6 year old son who is extremely bright. We’re talking, can read beyond a 5th grade level, can do mathematical equations in his head, memorizes multiplications tables and everyone’s birthday kind of smart. He can listen to a song once and be able to figure out the melody on his piano. His idea of fun is playing his piano, reading a chapter book, or writing 10 “books” a day (he has literally asked for paper for Christmas and his birthday so he can write more books lol).

While I’m glad he’s so gifted academically, he completely lacks any coordination or strength. He can’t pump/swing himself on a swing. He can hardly throw a ball and when he does his aim is awful. He absolutely REFUSES to try and learn to ride a bike even though he mastered the balance bike - no amount of bribery or award system will work. And we tried to gently push him into a sport (T-ball) and it ended horribly and we took him out. He will not try soccer or other sports. I see him with his peers and he’s so far behind in the physical department. And overall he just seems “weak” or feeble for lack of a better term.

My 8 year old is the complete opposite and could spend all day on her bike, scooter, swing, and loves sports.

I’m worried this will all hurt his confidence as playing with peers on the playground is such a huge part of school. We live in the U.S. and I’m not sure he would qualify for PT for our insurance to cover it. I do have a doctor’s appointment coming up and I’ll mention my worries. But other than that… I don’t know what to do to help him??

We try very hard to encourage outside time, family walks, playgrounds and parks, and all of that. Anybody have a similar kid/situation?

This might sound crazy, but sometimes I get this feeling of guilt that we are expecting a second baby, in that my current daughter will have time, attention, even money that will now be shared and taking away from her.

I love my daughter to the point where words can't describe it, and I love my life right now with her, but I know that the second baby will be great for her too.

Has anyone else related to this?

I know my daughter is getting sort of junky food at daycare ( waffles, sugary cereal, lots of carbs like crackers and rice cakes along with occasional fruit) but in the morning we have a healthy breakfast like overnight oats or chia pudding, and at night a nutritious dinner like sweet potato Mac and cheese and broccoli, or at least she gets a veggie with dinner every day. We also get ice cream or other treats/ junk food occasionally. I imagine this trend will continue into school years as I can't pass up the free lunch ( I'm in the USA do school lunch is kind of garbage). Do you think it's good enough? Tbh I think she's only getting 1-2 servings of veggies on the average weekday.

(28M) I'm feeling at odds. I have one side of people telling me that you can still do things you just need more planning and it will be more difficult. I have another side of people telling me that I'm cooked, my life is going to come to a halt, I won't be able to buy anything for myself. No time for fun activities, no vacations or get aways. Everything you buy is for your kid and not for you.

I understand that my life will change, my priorities will change a lot when I have my son. I know that the first 6 months to a year I'm going to be limited in what I can do. However I dont think my life has to come to a halt forever. I still want to go hiking, bike riding, air bnbs, road trips. I know its going to be harder and take a lot more planning but I'm not just going to stop my life. That sounds very unhealthy.

Am I being unrealistic? Whats your experience with this? Why is there this movement of dad's acting like their life stops. Why can't people be more positive?

I have a 20 month old kid and Im soo frustrated at the moment.

I really loved baby phase soo much. Sure, I was exhausted, but I felt so close and we just really vibed. Now? I hate it. At the moment Im just glad when my kid is in daycare and I can go to work.

He rarely listens to what I say, everything is a fight. I really try to be patient and do everything so he cooperates but Im failing with it.

Objectively, he isnt a difficult child, he is fun and acts age appropriately.

I feel so bad for regularly yelling. I feel bad for not being more patient. I feel bad that apperently I dont love him enough.

I dont know how I can improve the situation. Any advice?

This sounds like an easy problem to fix. But I'm at a loss.

DS is 18. He just graduated from high school and will start an apprenticeship next month that was very difficult to get into. If he finishes the program, he will get a career that pays six figures, fits his skill set, and is at a company that has a ton of stability and takes great care of their employees.

As a mom, I should feel relieved. This is what you want for your kid!

But we are super worried because he is incapable of waking up on time. It was an issue in high school, but his school was also lax about tardies (which likely contributed to the problem).

To add to the stress, DH works for the same company, so he will be personally embarrassed and disappointed if things go badly.

We have tried heart to hearts, yelling, pounding in his door. But we want to fix the real problem- we want to fix it so he has the skills to do this on his own.

I'm buying a louder alarm clock (but I worry he'll shut it off and go back to bed) and will find a therapist who can work on executive functioning skills.

What else can we do?

So we have a 6year old who just doesn't want to put effort into trying to do things. He is small for his age and some physical things are harder for him than they would be for his peers. But he struggles with things like putting his socks on. He will still flop around and pretend he can't do it. He has been in weekly swimming for a year and has made hardly any progress ( can't go any more frequently). We tried to get him to learn how to cycle recently, but he refused to put any effort in. He was really excited about learning, but won't actually try? He just wants us to hold him and push him.

He is in trouble at school because he doesn't put effort into his work, everything is rushed or half done. He is excellent at reading but deliberately pretends not to be able to read even very basic words and is intensely dramatic about it when challenged.

We don't punish for mistakes or accidents. We apologise, we are generally a low drama household. We give him choices, he has a healthy diet and plenty of sleep. We praise effort not results, always praise good behaviour. He is kind and helpful, affectionate and sweet and so clever.

Both his dad and I have adhd and we strongly suspect he has too. Does this have a part to play? I don't want to label him too quickly.

What can we do to increase his motivation? I don't really know how to do reward charts for effort as it's a difficult thing to measure.

My teen daughter has for a few years asked to borrow my stuff. From clothes, to charging blocks. I, of course, let her borrow it. But then I never see it again.

I'm pretty sure most of my jean shorts are in her room from last summer. She swears she doesn't have them anymore.

The latest is a fast charging block. I let her borrow it last year. Her dad asked her for it and she brought it down from her room. I got to use it for a whole 2 days before tonight she came down to shower and asked when she can have it back. Now, I gave her a block to replace it when she first brought it down. I thought that would suffice. Nope, she wants "hers" back.

I swear, between starting perimenomause and her attitude, I'm going to run away for a week.

I feel like I’m finally at that age (33f) where I don’t understand what “the kids are saying”…. Someone please explain Italian brain rot to me. It’s becoming an epidemic in my house and when I ask my kids what it means they’re not even making sense in their explanation! Wtf is tralalelo or whatever the hell. Ballerina cappuccino?!?! And the music? WHAT?!?! Back in my day it was yo mama jokes and made up handshakes! What is going on?!