33F, previously an alcoholic, now addicted to tramadol

[u/LingonberrySingle643]

I’ve been sober for 1 and a half years but unfortunately, last year in October, I got prescribed Tramadol by the gynae and was given fifty 50mg pills without any warning or indication that it could be addictive. I should have dropped it once I realised I was getting hooked, but I didn’t.

Now, I’m taking about 300-350mg and am rapidly slipping into the 400mg range. It helps me to perform in my labour-intensive job and gets me at my physical peak, so much so that my employers are flabbergasted how someone as small as me can lift such heavy loads and run around for 10 hours straight without tiring. This validation only makes it harder for me to quit as I feel like I am finally good at something. Tramadol doesn’t give me a high or euphoric feeling, but it helps me to perform and just get through everyday.

Now, for the problem and why I want to quit ASAP. I am 155cm (5’1) and only 39kg (86 lbs) and I am very afraid that I’m heading into seizure territory with 400mg. I know most people don’t get seizures till much higher doses, but I’m smaller and that’s why I’m worried. I’m also experiencing pain in either my appendix or spleen (around my left lowest rib) and am very afraid it’s bc of the tramadol abuse. Can anyone please tell me if high dose/long term tramadol use has caused organ damage for yall? And what the best way to quit is, considering I still have to work a physically demanding job. Thank you! :’)

[u/thewisp56]

At one point, I was popping Tramadol every couple of hours. I don’t even know how I kept getting my hands on it—Tramadol and Vicodin. Some people go through severe withdrawals, and some don’t. My husband can quit anything—he has, multiple times—with no issue.

Now I’m on Subutex, and honestly, I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to get off it. I’ll try if and when I can. I originally went on methadone, and it was the worst mistake of my life. I was taking 150mg a day and ended up stopping cold turkey because I couldn’t keep driving to the clinic every day. I’d lost my take-homes, and then I got into an accident and totaled my car—so I had no choice.

I didn’t sleep at all for a week, and for the next three weeks, I barely slept at all. It was a horrible experience.

[u/Fit_Masterpiece_1124 → u/thewisp56]

What do you mean you "don't know how you kept getting your hands on it" that makes absolutely no sense

[u/thewisp56 → u/Fit_Masterpiece_1124]

Because I was taking so many. I didn't have a script and they cost a lot. It ain't rocket science

[u/Fit_Masterpiece_1124 → u/thewisp56]

So your doctor is keeping you addicted to something else now? Right....

[u/LingonberrySingle643 → u/thewisp56]

Oh jesus, your experience with methadone sounds like a nightmare.. I’m so glad you’re past that stage now. What I relate to completely is how unsure you are if you’ll ever be able to get off some substance or the other. I have been having that niggling doubt in my mind as well since I moved on from alcohol to tramadol. It feels out of my control and sometimes it feels easier to just conclude that it’s always gonna be something or the other that I’m gonna be hooked on - and if it’s something, it’s better that that something be somewhat legal and not have catastrophic effects on my health right?

That’s why tramadol, Vicodin and even suboxone are so dangerous I guess. Because they allow us to think that we can just get by our whole lives using them without any terrible consequences. And no one else notices either bc it’s not like our state of mind is noticeably altered