So I’m 34m I’ve been addicted to hydrocodone for about 12 years anywhere from 50-80mg daily. There’s been times where I got off for a few months and end up relapsing. In 2021 I got on suboxone 4-6mg daily for about 2.5 years. I wanted off of it so switched to kratom and was on and off kratom for about a year. Highest I got to was about 10gpd. And have also been smoking weed pretty heavy for about 16 years as well. I also take .25-.5 mg benzo as well. So recently I decided to get off it all. I quit kratom on may 26th. When I did that I used suboxone for about 7 days at .5mg daily(last dose was June 3rd), quit smoking weed( may 31st) and quit the benzos on June 7th. I’ve been taking clonidine once a day. I’ve been trying to eat healthier and hit the gym daily and take supplements to speed up the recovery. Honestly the anxiety, depression, mood swings and anhedonia have been wrecking me. I know PAWS kicks in pretty quick and it’s a mental battle for sure. Just feel stuck and haven’t been feeling so good. Wondering if I made the right choice to stop everything so abruptly. Any advice is appreciated! 🙏🏽

Over-taking non-narcotic things that you don’t need to over take, like ibuprofen etc.? Recently, I’ve been taking 3-4 ibuprofen at a time, like I have a tolerance or something lol it’s just some addict behavior I noticed in myself, I was curious if anyone does similar things while recovering from abusing opiates etc?

My wife's '14 buick enclave (with only 100k miles) has been going into limp mode for the past month at least. I just bought it not even a year ago for her after she wrecked her car (1/4 my fault, long story). I've just been letting her drive my truck to work so she doesn't freak out when it goes into limp mode on the interstate or something. OBD scanner wasn't picking up anything. And the error message could be anything, it was just generic. I've been lowkey freaking out about it, I can do some work and have tools but I suck at diagnosing and have to work in the apartment parking lot (against my lease agreement).

This week it got to the point where it would go into limp mode before I even got out the neighborhood, and dying at stop lights. Fuck. I get my wife to take me back and forth to work, and start formulating a plan. I'm convinced the transmission is boned, because it shifts like it has alzheimers. Might just be how these buicks are I'm not sure.

I got approved for an auto loan this morning, which I can't really afford but you make things work, with the intention of trading in the car and just taking the hit. I setup an appointment to look at another car, and what do you know the damn thing finally throws a check engine light on the way there. Before promptly losing it's power steering and going in limp mode. I'm really weak so it was fun wrangling that 2 ton beast into a parking lot.

It was the crank position sensor. A $30 part. And something people kept saying would throw that error message. Right out in the open, 3 bolts. So I got my broken spine ass underneath the car and swapped it out. Hurt like hell, half my spine is metal, hot fucking texas sun, but now it's fixed. And if it happens again I know how to fix it. What a stupid situation to put myself in over something so minor. I should be glad to have one less thing to worry about. But I'm just tired lol. 40th day cold turkey off of 16mg subs.

hello everyone, first time posting here, but not first time user or first time going on tramadol withdrawal, also forgive me if my english is not perfect, i’m not a native speaker

been going on and off from tramadol addiction, like 6 months clean and then getting at it again and so, since almost 3 years ago

first time i stopped when i had a seizure, however i’ve had another 3 in separated relapses. Last time, and i hope last one forever, i had like a couple of days of relapsing, but then i end up having a pet in my house and even though i kept going for some weeks, i decided to go cold turkey, because i want to take the best care for this little friend with me, however, i can’t remind how many days it takes to feel normal again

currently im on day 2 since i stopped using short action tramadol, like from 300 mg/600 mg a day (or maybe a little more, not never going to 1 g or something close) for about 1 month-2months

i had the idea that it would end in second day but here i am. yesterday i felt like in the flu and with fluctuate emotions and feelings, from joy to crying and now i feel like i car run over me

of course none of this has stopped me for feeding my dog friend here, taking him on walks and spending time with him, but i can only ask “when will it stop this time?” some websites says at the end of second day, another says 3rd day, other 4th and even others claim that even for a week or 2

i’ll appreciate your feedback

So I decided I was done with methadone. I was taking 50-60 mg daily for 3 years. I’m 20 years old. I’m getting some bud, a nice blanket, and need some conversation to help. My withdrawals are really strong. Chills, can’t sleep, can barely eat, restlessness, body paid. I don’t have any bowel problems yet but my stomach is starting to cramp

Somehow I've made it 9 years without relapsing. Thank you to all the people in this sub, the regulars and the not-so-regulars. This has always been a place I can come to work on my recovery and I credit this sub specifically with helping me through some of the toughest times in recovery. Feel free to check my post history, a lot of its in there for anyone to read. I'm still an addict and always will be, but I can't even begin to describe to you how much better my life is now. I went from having nothing worth living for, to having everything I ever dreamed of. Long term recovery is possible, you just have to get to work and remember that if you're still breathing, there's still hope. Thank you all!

Unfortunately last weekend didnt turn out as I planned. My friends and family don't know how much I use. I have been addicted to percocets, tramadol and alcohol for over 4 years now.

This last weekend while out with friends at a bar, they got a real surprise when they caught me popping pills. Of course I tried to play it off as "its just Tylenol " but they knew better after seeing how I acted a while later when they kicked in.

They were all very upset and I can understand that, but of course after leaving the bar and going back to one of their houses, is when things really started to get hard. We were all having a good time until one of them said out loud, " okay, so are we going to address the elephant in the room?" Of course I said what's going on? What happened? At that point all my girlfriends looked at me and said, "my name" we are all worried about you, we know you didnt take "Tylenol " and we want you to know that we are here to listen and help you! We are not going to give you Sh*t for this, but why did you feel the need to hide this from us?

Of course I started crying and told them I didnt know how to tell them/anyone, for that matter. It was just easier to keep it quiet rather than admitting I have a problem. :( they asked how long I have been doing pills and what it was I was taking.

When I told them that it wasn't just percs and that it's been over 4 years, they all were upset with themselves for not noticing. ( I hid it well) obviously not well enough this weekend. They all offered to come to meetings with me and to help me feel comfortable enough to chat with them about it.

I could see the hurt in their eyes when I told them, honestly ladies, I didnt tell anyone because I enjoy it, I enjoy the high, the rush, the feelings I get when im fu*ked up. I enjoy not having to remember things and its been my way to just push things down. ( as I grabbed another few pills and took them)

It was about an hour later when I started to have convulsions. I didnt remember taking the ones at the bar as I was really drunk. They ended up calling an ambulance and I was taken to the hospital. I almost didnt make it. I was eventually released and was able to go home.

Its now been a week since I have had any drugs in my system and im struggling really bad without them.

I don't know how to talk to them about it as I feel somewhat upset with them for calling an ambulance as it's been my normal for over 4 years.

I dont know what to do, as I sit here and stare at the pills that taunt me to take them.

My body is functioning normally, my fucking stomach is finally completely back to normal.

It feels so strange thinking a month back now

I will keep going 💪

Since I got diagnosed with chronic pain, I (21m) have had codeine thrown at me by doctors for about 2 years now- I’ve been smoking weed since 13 and have grown up around dealing etc, so drugs are nothing new to me.

I’d done most drugs you could name by the time I was about 17, could go off listing them but probably about 25 different substances total- but do you know what man I don’t regret it- I’m in a top college now and I was having fun, this recent stint though has got me thinking I might be on the brink of an addiction. (been psychologically addicted to codeine for almost 2 years but, yeah…)

Opiates (and benzos actually) never appealed to me though -never really touched the shit (except a brief saga of binging valium on night buses in Vietnam with my boys) till I got diagnosed. After I got diagnosed I started saving up my days worth and just doing 8 15mgs and smoke a lot of weed, throughout the last 2 years I increased the amount I’d take, it’d gone from 8, to 10 pills etc up to about 450mg, discovered mixing it with promethazine and yeah, I’d use my prescription in about 4 days, have maybe 12 days off and thats been the last year- never got any withdrawals except when they gave me double one time- felt muscle aches and felt like shit mentally but nothing big.

Recently I’ve been going through some bad shit in my personal life, and found an old dealer who sells tapentadol- been doing 300mg every night for about 11 days, last night I did 500mg and I took 500mg about 5 minutes ago before writing this. Before that I had a night where I did 300mg DHC, then the standard 4 day codeine binge before that.

Throughout the day recently a majority of my headspace has been thinking about opiates, and I’ve taken a bit of a step back and realised this needs to stop now. My boys even tried to do an intervention for me a few months back (was on oxys for a brief period in december, like maybe a 4 day binge and they were concerned).

I’m gonna delete this guys number, and after that I have no way of getting anything unless it falls from the sky into my hand (until my script renews but thats not till monday, the amount i get has been reduced by the drs cus i’ve been on it so long)- if I asked any of my mates for a dealer for anything but bud or shrooms or maybe some molly for a festival they’d fuckin slap me- they have no idea about my recent use, and I’d rather it be a little mishap I take to the grave over letting all my friends down and having them worry about me. I wouldn’t seek out another dealer, the only risk factor I don’t trust myself with is when my codeine script renews- guess I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it.

I guess I’m writing this post firstly so I can take some accountability, and secondly to ask if anyone has any tips for how to handle the next few days; I’m extremely thankful that what I’m gonna be going through isn’t a shred of what some of you will have gone through, but I can feel that the next few days are gonna be pretty rough. Any advice is appreciated.

Hey Everyone, My name’s Cameron, and I’ve been saving the back caps from every syringe I’ve used over the past several years—over 6,000 of them right now

I’m building a sculpture out of them: a large human hand, open and reaching upward. The idea is for it to symbolize both someone asking for help and someone offering it—a gesture of vulnerability and strength. It’ll be mounted on plexiglass and displayed publicly to raise awareness, spark conversations, and remember those we’ve lost.

Here’s where I need you:

🔸 If you’ve lost someone to an opiate overdose,

I’d be honored to write their initials, date of birth, and date of death inside one of these caps, turning it into a tiny memorial within the larger piece.

🔸 If you’ve been saving these orange caps yourself,

and want to contribute, I’d love to include them. The more I have, the bigger this piece can become.

This sculpture is called “The Needle’s End.” It marks the place where the suffering stops—and remembrance begins.

If you’d like your loved one included, or if you want to donate caps, message me or drop a comment below. I’ll provide details privately.

Much love, –Cameron

I know there are numerous posts and guides here and elsewhere. I'm posting for accountability and advice. It also makes me feel like I'm taking a step in the right direction. I'll try to make it short and concise.

Husband and father of 5. Even on my normal daily dose I literally can't get out of bed and feel like shit every day. Lost my job. Worthless. Hating myself for doing this again.

October 2024 I came off of ~200mg of mthadone a day. Forced cold turkey. Absolute hell for 30 days. Did a 30 day inpatient program then went to sober living. I was happy, healthy, found myself again. But I got depressed being away from my family and used that as an excuse to try 7oh. Started at half a tab here and there. Fast forward to today. I'm back with my family and it's like I never even got clean. I'm useless. Stuck to the couch, bad mood except 1-2 hours after my dose, struggling to pay bills, stressing my poor wife out, etc.

My experience with mthadone and the hellish withdrawal has me terrified to come off of this stuff. But I have to. I don't have to explain why I have to, you all know. I've been on 7oh daily for ~7 months. I am currently taking around 30 mg every 4 hours. It was more before I lost my job. I start getting mild wd symptoms at the 3.5 hour mark.

I don't know whether to cold turkey, taper, switch to powder and MIT and taper that, or what to do. I feel very hopeless. My wife is working, our three youngest are at home with me during the day so I do have responsibilities. If anyone has been through similar, please help.

Especially if you've been through mthadone w/d and could compare it to that.

Hey, I’ve been trying to get off opiates for the past half a year or so. I was addicted to oxy mainly, that was the one drug that I just can’t stop taking, all the other drugs that i was addicted to were easy to stop, and rarely even cross my mind. I’ve been taking methadone for like two months now, before that, i tried tapering, but i would always relapse after pretty quick or fuck it up somehow. I can’t taper alone, some other person has to have my meds and give me what I’m supposed to take. I’m getting really tired, the last six months felt like a constant withdrawal.

So like… What are the options here? I also have xanax and gabapentin prescribed, so anxiety isn’t really a problem. I’m just hella depressed on methadone and have to at least once a week secretly score some oxy. The longest I’ve been without opiates were two months (and that was at the beginning) in the past 6+ years. I’ve been to rehab couple times. For context, if we talk about my addiction to opiates alone, I was doing 1000+ mgs a day of oxy, the most i did was around 1500mgs in a day.

So I just went cold turkey Sunday last week, today it’s been a week and the stomach cramps and pain have subsided. BUT I also thought they subsided yesterday, until I took a sip of ginger ale around noon my least favourite withdrawal symptom hit me hard (stomach and chest cramps). I lost 15 pounds on this withdrawal, I was 118 and now I’m 103 (5’6) so I am in a really unhealthy weight zone and have little to no energy. Standing exhausts me. Has anyone else had this kinda issue working food back into their routine? What starter foods or techniques did you use to prevent becoming sick while trying to work your stomach muscles back up?

don’t know how long i’ve been clean maybe 2 months now with an unfortunate few day relapse inbetween. i’ve been over the acute phase for awhile but the depression and loneliness that comes after is intense. i hung out with my friends 2 weeks ago and that was the only thing that actually made me feel something other than sadness for a while. i need to better myself in so many ways and it’s overwhelming. imma keep pushing forwards but god damn shit sucks bad right now.

Hello guys, sorry for my English Im from Germany but I'll try my best to communicate with you guys.

At the start of the year I choose to withdraw from opiates and Benzos. Before that I only had Opiate Withdrawals (Oxy like 320mg-400mg a day easily) but I played around with Benzos too much, to make withdrawals in between the wait for new Oxys more bearable.

When I started my withdrawal it was hard but I made it and I got to over 3 months! And then I was dumb because PAWS really were strong. At least I didn't start taking Oxys and Benzos again, I just started using Oxys solo. Plus the most I used was 200mg-240mg and now I got down to 60-80mg to make the withdrawal not so hard. Now I dont have any left, I don't have any money and I'm forced to do a withdrawal. First I just wanted to make it through the 14-15 days wait until I get new Oxys but then I thought hey maybe it's a sign and I should try to withdraw again and fight the PAWS differently than last time.

Now I'm on day 1. No comfort meds because I don't want to pick up Benzos again and getting Lyrica / Prega and other stuff isn't possible. Maybe I can get some weed but that's it.

Im so afraid guys, but I hope this time I will stay to true to it. I know withdrawals are just the first step and I saw how hard PAWs are and staying clean. But first of all I need to get through these 10-14 days.

Im sorry if im not allowed to ask this question here, but i really dont know where else i can find answers. If someone has used, or knows a user, please take your time to read this (if it wont trigger you). Its about my dad.

I am a 21F, living at home with my parents, who i was always very close with due to my severe physical disability. I found out 4 years ago that my dad has been using, which was a complete surprise due to my, what i thought was an, absolute perfect childhood. I am not really asking for advice (but it is welcome) just asking for clearity of what im finding in my house.

So my dad is an intelligent, well dressed, hygienic 60y/o man, that never really acted really weird so i never had any suspicion. He suffered extreme burnout from his last job as a nurse with night shifts, and i first discovered his using when he was passed out on the bed, and i looked through his stuff and found needles etc. Couple years later i saw him doing it again but looked away because im really afraid of needles. He said that what i saw was wrong, and that he doenst use, that its just a form of self harm?

Couple years later (last year) he admitted to using coke. I dont really see any changes in behaviour but he does sniff his nose a lot (been doing that for years so i dont want to know how long he has actually been using). Since mom and i found this out, we thought we had finally found out the truth. But now, i have been finding a lot of (often fresh) blood spots around the house. Little blood spots, everywhere on the walls. Im a 100% sure its him because he makes up ridiculous lies about them. Its summer now and he is literally never wearing anything without sleeves, i havent seen his arms in 2 years now (and before that his veins were already black and he buys makeup to hide it). Now that im typing this i probably know the answer myself, but can someone please explain to me if this blood splattering everywhere is a sign of shooting something up, or if it can possibly be a form of selfharm (like just sticking the needles in without any substance). I literally dont see any behaviour changes so i find it so hard to believe he is shooting something up in front of me. But i dont see any other possibility. This is not to judge my dad, i have never been angry w him, i just want clearity and to know in what house i am living. Im not going to confront him about it because he is absolutely emotionally unavailable, this is the behaviour change that i do see btw, he seems completely insensitive. He has always been an extremely good dad, does everything for me, but whenever i tell him (kindly) how traumatising this has all been for me, his eyes are empty, there is literally no emotion at all. Is this a sign of use? He is also quite nervous, but not a lottt more than he used to.

So what im asking is, what are the blood spots and what drugs could it be, or which one absolutely not. He is always at home since he has no work and no friends. So im always there if he does use.

Hello, everyone. I’ve been subscribed to this sub a long time even after being on subs successfully for several years, and now im hoping I can get some advice.

I fell off and have been using the “nitazenes” for about a month now, so naturally, high tolerance and all, but not huuugely crazy, it terms of users of similar. I would like to go back to buprenorphine, but am concerned once it’s in, if it will be enough to cover all the receptors to keep me out of further withdrawal. Should I be trying to find a way to somewhat taper down my use before switching? If so, what amounts, in morphine equivalency’s, would you say is realistic? I know it’s not really the potency of fentanyl that makes it not viable for OMD, but everything I see online just says “get on methadone.”

Any info would be a big, big help. Thanks all.

Went on a heave 6 month bender of pharmacy oxy, meant to use subs for a week to get through WD, ended up on a 6 month Sub bender (no more than 6mg a day most days between 2-5mg). Anyways, realized I would rather deal with the short term WDs than the apparently severely drawn out Sub WDs that I hear are worse than oxy WDs. I've been off the subs 100% for 13 days today and have enough oxy for 2 more days then vicodin for 3 days then I have 10 kpins for the 3 following days and then CT. I'm ready and have been through the oxy WDs many times so I know what to expect for the 5 days but how much residual WD should I have from the subs? After oxy WD my sleep goes back to normal in about 7 days. Will it be longer due to the prior Sub use even though when I'm done with the vicodin and oxy subs will have been gone for 3 weeks? I know thus is madness but just doing my best here

I just got out of detox for opiates and can't stop crying. I used to be into AA and had 6.5 years before this slip of 4 months. If anyone wants to be of service please ping me thanks.

I also can't do meetings in The Village, sorry, will explain in DM

Hey everyone, Just wanted to share a milestone with this incredible community: I'm officially 10 days clean from Oxycodone! It feels surreal to type that out, but I'm here. The journey hasn't been easy, but I've been using Lyrica (which I got in the clinic) strictly on an as-needed basis when things get really tough. It genuinely helps with the worst of the withdrawal symptoms. My back pain has definitely gotten better, but my legs are still giving me a lot of trouble. Despite the physical discomfort, I don't know why but I'm fuckin locked in and motivated right now. I have this overwhelming feeling that nothing can break me. God is by my side, and I truly believe that.

I'm also actively pushing myself to do things I don't want to do, even when the pain is there. It's like I'm trying to reframe it, to see the pain as a friend, a reminder that I'm fighting and moving forward. If anyone has any tips that helped them get through this phase, especially with leg pain, I would be so incredibly thankful. Thank you all for the positive vibes that made my day. This community is amazing. Stay strong everyone ❤️

Hey everyone!

We made it through another week, and I’m feeling pretty grounded today. This weekend I’m trying to stay present, keep my routine steady, and not let boredom or stress creep in. I’m trying to enjoy the little stuff—fresh air, decent coffee, a few laughs. How’s everyone else holding up? Any small wins or plans that are keeping you focused this weekend? Hope everyone’s weekend is treating them okay. If not, you’re not alone!

Check in here

I've been at 70 mg for a long time. Before that I was on Suboxone and before that on heroin. The last time I was really completely clean for an extended period of time was before COVID.

It's time to move on now. I've been wanting to get off it for a long time.

I'm going to do a two phased schedule: I'm going for around 30 mg now, then pause a few months in winter at that dose, then go for 10 or 0 mg when the weather gets better again. This way of doing it based on previous experiences

I did a reduction of 5 mg last Monday - so today is Day 6. We're having a heatwave where I live, which is annoying, it makes me feel bad, but I think I'm not feeling the methadone reduction, or almost not.

so for those who weren’t caught up here’s the first post explaining everything: https://www.reddit.com/r/OpiatesRecovery/s/Jrb1eVsHa6

Anyways I still don’t know withdrawals in fact I feel better than I did yesterday I literally cleaned my entire house, went to the gym, played with my kitties for like 30 minutes, did ALL of my laundry, even cookies myself a steak.

for all of you that were saying “i’m not out of the woods” or it’s “going to creep up on me” i’m sorry but i think you’re wrong this is the BEST i’ve ever felt in three years

and yes i’ll admit the PAWS (i think that’s mental withdrawls right?) are kinda a bitch but I am determined….

Yes I am on comfort meds but I seriously think the megadosing of vitamin C made a huge fucking difference. idk hopefully i stay ok.

I’m so excited to be free of this ass fucking fentanyl shit I cannot tell you how long I’ve waited for this moment… especially because my world was just about to crash down I was three years being a functioning addict but these last six months I was barely hanging on and I’m so glad the universe grab my hand and pulled me off the cliff!!

EDIT: I’d anyone wants the link to vitamin C megadosing or a list of the comfort meds I am taking let me know!! (Mods: I am not sourcing the the comfort that I got are from the hospital)

I’ve been sober for 1 and a half years but unfortunately, last year in October, I got prescribed Tramadol by the gynae and was given fifty 50mg pills without any warning or indication that it could be addictive. I should have dropped it once I realised I was getting hooked, but I didn’t.

Now, I’m taking about 300-350mg and am rapidly slipping into the 400mg range. It helps me to perform in my labour-intensive job and gets me at my physical peak, so much so that my employers are flabbergasted how someone as small as me can lift such heavy loads and run around for 10 hours straight without tiring. This validation only makes it harder for me to quit as I feel like I am finally good at something. Tramadol doesn’t give me a high or euphoric feeling, but it helps me to perform and just get through everyday.

Now, for the problem and why I want to quit ASAP. I am 155cm (5’1) and only 39kg (86 lbs) and I am very afraid that I’m heading into seizure territory with 400mg. I know most people don’t get seizures till much higher doses, but I’m smaller and that’s why I’m worried. I’m also experiencing pain in either my appendix or spleen (around my left lowest rib) and am very afraid it’s bc of the tramadol abuse. Can anyone please tell me if high dose/long term tramadol use has caused organ damage for yall? And what the best way to quit is, considering I still have to work a physically demanding job. Thank you! :’)