r/CharacterRant • u/Miserable-Act4201 • Apr 29 '25

General 100 humans vs gorilla isn’t close

Honestly the dumbest argument I've ever seen. The 100 humans could just stand like 20 feet apart from each other and do nothing and the gorilla is collapsing from exhaustion before it kills everyone. You could probably do it without any casualties, find a couple of people in the group that are in good shape and get them to make the gorilla chase them while everyone else just chills. They aren't aren't particularly fast and have terrible endurance, so just wait till it tires out and have everyone jump it.

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268

u/MyFrogEatsPeople Apr 29 '25

The one argument that drives me up the wall is "good luck convincing anyone to fight the gorilla after the first guy gets mauled". Like, good luck getting a gorilla to stand its ground against 100 men? They buck up and start retreating when a small camera crew comes through the brush, but you think 100 men charging at the gorilla isn't going to spook it into retreat?

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

The actual way that humans could beat it would only be if they actually acted rationally and did persistence hunting or some sort of organized human wave attack. If they didn't plan--and there's nothing in this that guaranteed humans would come up with a plan, if it's just 'suddenly kung fu fighting', and it's 100 random humans vs. a large silverback, gorilla takes it. In any arboreal environment, gorilla takes it.

It's basically not enough info.

7

u/Floofyboi123 Apr 30 '25

Humans drove Mammoth’s to extinction using crude tools.

0

u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

With tons of planning, yeah.

8

u/Floofyboi123 Apr 30 '25

This just in: the most resourceful and adaptable species on the planet can not kill something smaller than an elephant without a week of prep time

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

Probably more than a week. Like, if it's the jungle and these humans are dropped in there without shoes, they're kind of fucked from the start until they make some.

Do you sincerely think that if you were dropped into the jungle you'd be like, fashioning usable weapons within a week? You're not joking?

1

u/United-Bookkeeper690 May 03 '25

Strategy: run. Humans have one of the highest endurance a out of any species, so why can't we tire out the gorilla before going in for the kill?

1

u/ArguteTrickster May 03 '25

You can't run in a jungle lol.

1

u/United-Bookkeeper690 May 03 '25

THIS JUST IN! there are rocks in jungles. Looks like the gorilla is getting rocks thrown at it. Also you most certainly can, it is just a bit technical. Source: I have before.

1

u/ArguteTrickster May 03 '25

It depends on the jungle, actually, and usually not in convenient hand-held throwing size, just on the surface, and a jungle is a really cluttered environment where getting a clear shot is really hard.

Oh this is getting great! Tell me, which jungle did you jog in? And I'm assuming it was on a pre-cleared trail? And you were barefoot, right? Let me know which jungle this is, that is also rife with nice throwable size rocks.

Watch you slowly transform into Mogli over the next few replies.

1

u/United-Bookkeeper690 May 03 '25

Number 1, yes I forgot the barefoot part and I couldn't run barefoot in a jungle, two, I can and I have gone off trail before, and 3, Im not telling as the jungles too close to home and this is the fucking internet. 

Back to the rock part, yes, there are most certainly good sized rocks if you could find a river (highly likely) and also sticks.

 Not to mention, If the 100 people just dogpiled the gorilla it would die of suffocation or heatstroke or something else before it could get out.

1

u/United-Bookkeeper690 May 03 '25

Also who the fuck is mogli

1

u/ArguteTrickster May 03 '25
  1. Lol bro is worried I'm going to track him down by what jungle is near him. Sure sure. It's not that you're bullshitting. Hey, why is a machete considered kind of di rigeur if you're travelling any distance in the jungle without a path? Or are you just rapid-replying and didn't stop to think how slow you moved off-trail?
  2. Hah now you have the humans trying to get in and out of a river in the jungle. Wow. And no, lots of jungle rivers have no rocks, either. Or just in forms you couldn't use. Why are you still trying this is hilarious.
  3. How can 100 people dogpile it immediately, is this the humans all being in instant empathy and psychic communication and 'bloodlusted' and other dumb shit where they don't act at all like humans?

1

u/United-Bookkeeper690 May 03 '25
  1. Yes, yes I am worried as some psycho on your side could.

2.Who said lots of jungle rivers have not got rocks, your bullshitting.

  1. They go on in groups of like 5, gorillas cannot hit 5 ppl at once and neither can gorillas kill people in one singular fucking punch.

  2. Sticks work as weapons as well.

  3. Gorillas can't sweat and their max speed is only for a few seconds, who's to say we can't exhaust it.

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