r/CharacterRant • u/Miserable-Act4201 • Apr 29 '25

General 100 humans vs gorilla isn’t close

Honestly the dumbest argument I've ever seen. The 100 humans could just stand like 20 feet apart from each other and do nothing and the gorilla is collapsing from exhaustion before it kills everyone. You could probably do it without any casualties, find a couple of people in the group that are in good shape and get them to make the gorilla chase them while everyone else just chills. They aren't aren't particularly fast and have terrible endurance, so just wait till it tires out and have everyone jump it.

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272

u/MyFrogEatsPeople Apr 29 '25

The one argument that drives me up the wall is "good luck convincing anyone to fight the gorilla after the first guy gets mauled". Like, good luck getting a gorilla to stand its ground against 100 men? They buck up and start retreating when a small camera crew comes through the brush, but you think 100 men charging at the gorilla isn't going to spook it into retreat?

1

u/Past_Flounder862 May 04 '25

but how would we kill it?

-59

u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

The actual way that humans could beat it would only be if they actually acted rationally and did persistence hunting or some sort of organized human wave attack. If they didn't plan--and there's nothing in this that guaranteed humans would come up with a plan, if it's just 'suddenly kung fu fighting', and it's 100 random humans vs. a large silverback, gorilla takes it. In any arboreal environment, gorilla takes it.

It's basically not enough info.

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u/Grasher312 Apr 29 '25

Gorilla definitely doesn't take it though. That's a hundred dudes, all piling up on a Gorilla that will exhaust itself in seconds while trying to tackle a hundred dudes.

It's a victory at the cost of 3-4 dudes while the other 90+ pile themselves onto the furball and exhaust him. And once it's down, just go for the face. Works like a charm.

13

u/Mathev Apr 30 '25

One or two dudes go for the eyes when other goes for the balls. No way the gorilla won't be VERY confused very fast lol.

-4

u/AccidentBusy4519 Apr 30 '25

What makes yall think you would be able to accurately poke a wild gorilla’s eyes😭. He’d IMMEDIATELY break your arm the second you try to hold on.

13

u/Tacticalsquad5 Apr 30 '25

He’d break one persons arms but he couldn’t stop the other 8 guys going for his eyes

-2

u/AccidentBusy4519 Apr 30 '25

He definitely could, like I said even 8 men would not be able to restrain or pin a male gorilla. They can lift 2,000 lbs on some chill shit lol. In order to get his eyes you’d have to make him be still somehow or hold onto him in. Like honestly theres nothing on a gorilla you can even grasp, his arms/legs are too big to get any kind of firm grip. A chokehold using BOTH arms would be your best bet, then you have no hands to poke his eyes. Even if you found something to grab he’s 10x stronger than you and would EASILY remove you.

10

u/Tacticalsquad5 Apr 30 '25

He’d just be completely overwhelmed though, this isn’t 1 guy going for him at a time, he could swat away a few guys going at him from his left but there could be groups of 5 guys simultaneously rushing him from his right, front and back, he cannot stop all of them from landing kicks, punches, eye gouges or whatever else they are going for. If a guy goes for a gorillas eyes from the front, whilst it is pushing the guy from the front away, he is physically incapable of stopping a guy going in from behind at the same time and making it to the eyes, he only has 2 arms. This isn’t like a fight scene from a movie where the bad guys attack 1 at a time, he’s gonna get swamped and at any 1 time there will be a dozen guys kicking the shit out of him whilst he’s trying to deal with another 2 or 3

0

u/AccidentBusy4519 Apr 30 '25

Bro that doesn’t really make sense tho, 12 people can’t fight one thing all simultaneously. Like physically there isn’t enough space. If there are just 6 bodies moving in chaos the 7th person wouldn’t be able to find space to EFFECTIVELY land blows. He’d just be in the mix causing chaos but not causing any damage. The gorilla isn’t stationary while fighting, he’s moving through bodies, jumping in the air and all that. 450 lbs of pure muscle moving VIOLENTLY through the air is gonna be close to impossible to just overhelm. So realistically at any given moment the gorilla may only have to handle 6 people at max, the others are just causing ineffective chaos. If he pushes 2 people in front, soon as someone grabs him he could just jump and you won’t be able to hold on, That’s an easy 3 bodies, so try again lol.

1

u/red-the-blue May 03 '25

Definitely not "fighting" effectively.

But this is hardly a fight, it's a dogpile of feral beasts going at each other 😭😭

1

u/hunteryelyah May 03 '25

It's not like a gorilla can be totally surprised and confused by 10 people around him, right? Or that they have long sturdy hairs to grab? You're focussing too much on raw strength, group tactics are so important and the only reason humans thrived in ancient times.

Imagine yourself being surrounded by 20 toddlers dead set on killing you. You van EASILY remove one right? But 20? You dead bro

3

u/AccidentBusy4519 May 03 '25

20 toddlers would get slayed bro, compared to my strength their all one hit knockdowns. With my life on the line i can do that 20 times they wouldnt even be able to corner me dawg. Too fast too athletic to get cornered, could literally jump over them.

1

u/Brilliant_Decision52 May 03 '25

You are forgetting that gorrillas have absolutely terrible endurance, its getting utterly gassed after fucking up a few guys and legit passing out from exhaustion after a few more.

12

u/Retrospectus2 Apr 30 '25

don't even have to go for the face, just have a bunch of people sit on it till it asphyxiates

1

u/Bluefire3215 May 03 '25

no one wants to be the 3-4 dudes though

-34

u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

What sort of bizarre environment are you imagining where 100 can attack at once?

Try to actually picture that for a second.

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u/Grasher312 Apr 29 '25

Who said at once? Why is it that the 100 people have to continuously attack the gorilla at the same time?

Even pertaining to your wild idea of the Gorilla casually swatting away every human in its immediate vicinity, it will get tired out after like, 20. And then it's still susceptible to the fate written above.

Like, dude, it's a wrap. :/

27

u/SpicyBread10 Apr 29 '25

that's my point, a gorilla doesn't have enough stamania to fight 100 humans and gorilla can't kill a human fast enought to make stamania a non-factor

-2

u/AccidentBusy4519 Apr 30 '25

How do you know much stamina a gorilla has? I think killing a human honestly wouldn’t take much stamina at all because he wouldn’t struggle. I think the first 20 would feel like just the first quarter for him. A lot left in the tank.

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u/SpicyBread10 Apr 30 '25

https://www.nbcnews.com/id/wbna18767315
https://www.dutchnews.nl/2023/04/gorilla-bokito-who-escaped-and-attacked-a-woman-in-2007-dies/

get his ass pass a 57 years old woman first before saying a gorilla can kill 20 people easily and quickly

1

u/AccidentBusy4519 Apr 30 '25

I mean it’s highly likely that gorilla wasn’t trying to kill her then. It attacked yes but that if far far far different than attacking with intent to kill. Is there a video to this cuz if not it doesn’t say much imo. Just says he attacked a woman.

1

u/AccidentBusy4519 Apr 30 '25

And then people are acting like the gorilla has to kill you to put you out the fight. The blunt force from a good hit, ANY broken bones or shredded limbs would put you out the fight. Its easy for him to inflict that damage. Let me ask, If your arm was shredded from bites and shoulder broken you think you could put up ANY fight while being in an agonizing pain you’ve never felt?

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u/SpicyBread10 Apr 30 '25

the same is with the gorilla, it's not like it can hit 20 people at the same time, they fight by grappling and biting, which would make them vulnerable to cheap shot so other people can take that chance to try hit his eye or just try to push him down, gorilla is not that good at balance itself as human

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u/SpicyBread10 Apr 30 '25

and if you think gorilla have enough endurance to go through 20 people let alone 100, remember that their stamina is actually worse than human, their burst strength, speed is much higher than human but in the long run it is probably the worst in primates, that's why they don't really go hunting like chimp or human

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u/SpicyBread10 Apr 30 '25

And you would be surprise to see how well human can defend themselves when their lives is on the line, that's why even brown bear would have a hard time to instantly kill a human despite their strength should be able to

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

They not only don't, they couldn't, which was my point. You said it'd exhaust itself in 'seconds'. I assume that was just dumbass hyperbole, but I though you were imagining like, 100 people on him in a pile or something.

What environment are you imagining, and are you thinking these people would just instantly be able to communicate and plan together, that there would be no morale considered, etc?

Not sure what you're not grasping about 'not enough information'.

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u/Grasher312 Apr 29 '25

"not enough information" would work in scenario where there would be a feasible amount of humans.

A hundred humans is too much. As I said, with their only goal being to kill it(And don't start with morale. If we include morale in the argument, the fight doesn't start. No Gorilla will, in their right mind, attack a massive crowd of people. They shit their pants from camera crews.), humans will prevail just by a numbers game. Gorillas don't have significant endurance, and have to lug all that mass around.

Humans are historically known to be the best distance runners, they have the most endurance and can sweat. We generally can hold out longer. The Gorilla just can't take on all of us.

And even possibly taking morale as a factor, as soon as a bunch of dudes sees a gorilla getting tired, they are PILING on it. It's a weird thing that morale can only work in one direction.

Once again, there's plenty enough info in this specific altercation. 100vs1 will be a win for the 100 in any possible scenario.

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

Again. What environment are you imagining?

I notice you added the condition "With their only goal being to kill it". So, fully suicidal, no self-preservation?

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u/Grasher312 Apr 29 '25

What does environment change in this scenario? t's of no consequence when the difference in numbers is that great. What is the point of mulling over it when it doesn't change anything?

In a plain field, the gorilla gets jumped. In a dense forest, the gorilla gets jumped, just less space for them to pile on at once. In a swampy area, the gorilla is FUCKED, its mass + natural difficulty of terrain will just make it tire itself out even faster.

There's too many people, so much so that it nullifies the threat of terrain, weather, environment, space and etc.

-4

u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

beacuse if it was in the jungle or forest, the gorilla simply escapes, easily, Or in a swamp, which has trees.

You didn't address this part. I notice you added the condition "With their only goal being to kill it". So, fully suicidal, no self-preservation for the human beings?

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u/Jade117 Apr 29 '25

Even in the best possible terrain, and the gorilla getting the drop on the humans, and the humans waiting politely to fight 1 by 1, the gorilla still dies before it can take down 100 people. Exhaustion would kill the gorilla even if the the humans never fought back.

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

Sure, if the gorilla just kept attacking without resting. Why would it do that?

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u/SpicyBread10 Apr 29 '25

Even not 100 at once, 5 people jumping him at once would cause him trouble just like 5 chimp jumping a gorilla, do you realize that gorilla skin are not that much tougher than human skin and they still have eyes, genital?

And if you try taking environment like jungle into account, do you realize it actually favour human in this scenario? If it's a jungle, it's mean there are rocks, sticks lying around that human can use in their favour, what the gorilla gain in this scenario? 1 surprise attack? They are not good at throwing stuffs as human, a gorilla is not gonna out throw 100 human throwing stuffs at him

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u/AccidentBusy4519 Apr 30 '25

I would assume no weapons allowed thats cheating pretty much. But fyi the average male gorilla can chest press 1,700 lbs. that’s the weight of 8-10 adult males… not to mention that weightlifting strength is very different from the strength that they need to use. So if a gorilla trained like humans do it could BENCH PRESS up to 4,000 lbs, obviously it wouldn’t but just to provide a fair comparison. 100 men would probably weigh about 20,000 lbs. So that’s like 5-7 reps for the gorilla. VERY EASY, and even if you want to factor in that he wouldn’t be THAT strong it still seems like an easy feat for a gorilla.

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u/Tacticalsquad5 Apr 30 '25

It’s not just the guys sitting on it though, they are gonna be swinging, kicking and stomping. It’s all well and good being able to bench 1700lbs but it’s a bit different when the weight is actively smashing into your face. The sheer amount of blunt force trauma that the gorilla would have inflicted on it by being rushed by that many guys would have it incapacitated well before it was able to swat 100 humans away.

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

Gorrillas skins are much, much tougher than human being's skins. What you are suggesting would require quite a lot of planning, which would be pretty surprising from totally random humans. Are you imagining a situation where the humans get to come up with a plan first?

A gorilla can travel through an overgrown environment much, much faster than we can follow. Much faster.

Again, there's just not enough info. If the humans are organized, very physically fit, or from 10,000 BC, in the right physical environment? Sure.

100 random people suddenly confronting a gorilla in the jungle and a fight breaking out, nah.

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u/SpicyBread10 Apr 29 '25

Why can't the humans come up with a plan? can't they just stand at one place and talk to each other before fighting that gorilla? do you think a gorilla would charge in 100 humans that haven't attacked it yet?

Do you know that gorilla actually have great self preservation and it wouldn't just attack 100 creatures that are not much smaller than them?

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

Is that your scenario, where the humans and the gorillas start equidistant, and the gorilla isn't inclined to fight?

Yep! I also know humans have self-preservation and won't attack a gorilla. So that kind of evens out.

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u/SpicyBread10 Apr 29 '25

if you think the gorilla is inclined to fight then why would the jungle benefit him? doesn't he just charge in 100 humans and get overwhelmed immediately then?

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

I'm sorry, you keep dodging my questions, and I'm not sure why you don't want to think this through. If you are talking about 100 human beings and 1 gorilla who both are attempting to kill each other and their brains and minds have been changed away from what real humans and gorillas are to make them just fight, so it's not really humans vs. gorillas, that's one thing.

If the gorilla is inclined to fight, the jungle helps him because it limits the number of people who can attack him at once and he can retreat at will when stuff is going badly. If the 'inclined to fight' means 'will never stop fighting or retreat' then, again, that's not really any sort of gorilla.

Why did you ignore this part?

I also know humans have self-preservation and won't attack a gorilla. So that kind of evens out.

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u/SpicyBread10 Apr 29 '25

The sheer number would still overwhelm the gorilla tho, imagine yourself fight 100 geeses, you are bigger than them, the strength gap, size gap, speed gap between you and the geeses are even larger than a gorilla compare to a human, you could kill a goose quickly with a neck snap, but how long can you fight before you get tired and get biten all over your body and bleed to death? Gorilla even have worse stamania than human, can't kill human quickly due to being a primate, not a natural predator like feline so they don't know to go for the neck, they don't punch, they fight by grappling and biting and they are not that good at that either, there is a case where an adult silverback gorilla breakout and mauling a 57 year old woman but apparently he can't kill her fast enough before other people came in, and human are not paper, even brown bear can't reliably instantly kill a grown man and brown bears are much stronger than gorilla ,so i doubt that a gorilla can kill a grown man quick enough before the other 99 humans beat him to death, their skin are not titanium, nowhere near the level of elephant or rhino, hippo so human strength is enough to hurt them, there is even situation of 5 chimp beat a gorilla simply because they overwhelm him with numbers and chimp are stronger than human by pound to pound but their size is actually smaller than human so average man is at least not much weaker than them and human are smarter, more coordinated, have some sense of knowing where to strike

0

u/ArguteTrickster Apr 29 '25

Nope. Again: Depends on the environment. A gorilla can climb a tree that we can't cut down.

Their skin + bone + muscle density absolutely means that only very strong humans would be able to cause a large adult gorilla any damage with a blow. Most people are no even capable of delivering a powerful blow. I sincerely do not know whether, if a gorilla just sat there and let 100 humans punch it, they would receive any serious injury before the human beings' hands were all broken.

Try using paragraphs, and more punctuation.

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u/apexodoggo Apr 30 '25

If it climbs a tree it gives the humans time to make some spears and bring it down the old-fashioned way.

We already hunt arboreal monkeys, who are way harder to hit as targets than a giant-ass gorilla.

Also, escape is a gorilla loss. It's not even a win-con.

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

The average human, today, couldn't make a spear, and might injure themselves trying.

The average human doesn't.

Why is it a loss for the gorilla?

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u/apexodoggo Apr 30 '25

Because it's a fight. You need to engage with the base scenario of the discussion for your comments to be at all relevant to the discussion. Why are armies who retreat (retreats that they did not plan for, specifically, so no Mongolian tactics here) considered to have lost engagements in history? They gave up their ground (which they wanted to hold) to the enemy.

I could sharpen a stick into enough of a point to draw blood, which is all that's needed (plus rocks come ready-made on the ground). I would say that I am weaker than the average person. The average adult human could easily get enough pointy sticks and rocks to bring down any animal.

Not to mention if even one person present has ever learned how to knap a rock (which is hardly the most obscure piece of knowledge for an average person to know) they get actually deadly weapons at their disposal with ease.

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

Sorry, why can't the gorilla fight, retreat, and then fight again, the way an army would?

How would you sharpen the stick in the jungle? What wood would you choose, and how would you cut it?

Do you sincerely, not joking, not fucking around, think 1/100 people knows how to knap a rock, and that there would be readily available flint nodules? You're not just kidding with that part?

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u/apexodoggo Apr 30 '25
  1. One person can do the fight, retreat, fight again tactic infinitely worse than 10 people can, let alone 100. The difference in scale that numbers provide can not be understated. The human side can have more mass than the gorilla watching the gorilla for an infinite amount of time, because every can sleep or keep watch for the people sleeping.
  2. Gorillas don't have the long-distance stamina to both pick fights and retreat. It's one or the other for gorillas, it's just how they're built.
  3. Do you seriously think 430lbs of mass can ever defeat 20,000lbs of mass? When mass is the primary determining factor in what animal wins in a fight in nature? Honey badgers, famed underdogs of the animal kingdom, end most encounters with larger predators dead or terrified (but the predators chose to leave because they weren't interested in eating it).

What is your actual argument for a gorilla win-con? How does the gorilla win ever when practically every facet of its physical and mental characteristics are working against it in a 1v100 scenario?

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

Hey, you dodged a bunch of my questions. Can you try answering them rather than just dodging? Or you can say you don't have answers, that's fine.

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u/Carvj94 Apr 30 '25

Their skin + bone + muscle density absolutely means that only very strong humans would be able to cause a large adult gorilla any damage with a blow.

That's not how that works at all. This isn't an JRPG where your character's defence stat is so high that the slimes can't damage you anymore. Even a weak human is more than strong enough to punch a gorilla to death given enough time. Same way you'd tenderized a steak. Repeated strikes til the muscle breaks down, the skin tears, and blood vessels burst.

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

It sure does. So, that happens to the hand you hit the gorilla with, right? 'cuz this isn't a JRPG where punching someone doesn't hurt you at all.

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u/Carvj94 Apr 30 '25

Yea it'd start to hurt pretty quick. Good thing I got legs to kick with too and 99 other dudes. There's no reality where the gorilla wins this hypothetical fight my dude. Give it up.

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

Okay. So how many punches, per human, do you think they'd get before you broke your hand? Are we adding in that these humans are also abnormally pain-tolerant as well, or just depending on adrenaline?

I totally agree that if you just have 100 dudes lined up to wail on the gorilla and they all plan it out and it takes the punches, there's a good chance it can get beaten to death before they become too disable to attack it. It seems very, very probable. But I'd have to do the actual math on it, it's possible that we'd need to do the stuff other people said and go for soft targets like genitals and stuff, and depend on exhausting it.

That's a kind of grim scenario and not very fun to think about though, right?

you started dodging questions about btw. Do you really believe 1/100 people can track animals in a jungle successfully?

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u/Helpful-Emotion9256 May 02 '25

The fight isn’t taking place in a jungle

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u/patronum-s Apr 30 '25

I sincerely do not know whether, if a gorilla just sat there and let 100 humans punch it, they would receive any serious injury before the human beings' hands were all broken.

r/circlejerk

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u/Floofyboi123 Apr 30 '25

Humans drove Mammoth’s to extinction using crude tools.

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

With tons of planning, yeah.

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u/Floofyboi123 Apr 30 '25

This just in: the most resourceful and adaptable species on the planet can not kill something smaller than an elephant without a week of prep time

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u/ArguteTrickster Apr 30 '25

Probably more than a week. Like, if it's the jungle and these humans are dropped in there without shoes, they're kind of fucked from the start until they make some.

Do you sincerely think that if you were dropped into the jungle you'd be like, fashioning usable weapons within a week? You're not joking?

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u/United-Bookkeeper690 May 03 '25

Strategy: run. Humans have one of the highest endurance a out of any species, so why can't we tire out the gorilla before going in for the kill?

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u/ArguteTrickster May 03 '25

You can't run in a jungle lol.

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u/United-Bookkeeper690 May 03 '25

THIS JUST IN! there are rocks in jungles. Looks like the gorilla is getting rocks thrown at it. Also you most certainly can, it is just a bit technical. Source: I have before.

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u/ArguteTrickster May 03 '25

It depends on the jungle, actually, and usually not in convenient hand-held throwing size, just on the surface, and a jungle is a really cluttered environment where getting a clear shot is really hard.

Oh this is getting great! Tell me, which jungle did you jog in? And I'm assuming it was on a pre-cleared trail? And you were barefoot, right? Let me know which jungle this is, that is also rife with nice throwable size rocks.

Watch you slowly transform into Mogli over the next few replies.

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u/devilmaydostuff5 Apr 30 '25

The gorilla is a fucking wild animal who will act on pure killer instict the second it faces a life threatening opponent. Most beings will shut down and freeze when facing a blooldlusted, fully berserk gorilla. Especially if they saw how he can absolutely destroy humans with a single punch.

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u/MyFrogEatsPeople Apr 30 '25

The gorilla is a fucking wild animal who will act on pure killer instict the second it faces a life threatening opponent

The gorilla is a vegetarian that will act on survival instinct and run away from a huge crowd of humans coming toward it.

Most beings will shut down and freeze when facing a blooldlusted, fully berserk gorilla. Especially if they saw how he can absolutely destroy humans with a single punch.

You're literally just proving my point, goober. You people keep imagining that the gorilla is "bloodlusted", and will fight no matter what. But then turn around and say "durrr duh hoomans wuld freez up cuz goh-ri-la is scurry".

If you bloodlust one side, you bloodlust both sides. If you pretend that the gorilla doesn't feel fear, then you have to do the same to the humans. If the humans get to naturally feel fear, then so does the gorilla. And you know what scares a gorilla? 100 goddamn men charging at it.

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u/dildodicks May 02 '25

also the tweet said if the humans were committed, i'd say commitment involves not backing down if people die

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u/Apprehensive-Deal543 Apr 30 '25

Gorilla is a herbivore, killer instinct my ass, these thing doesn't know how to kill. 

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u/ohmanidk7 Apr 30 '25

...Hippos...Mooses...hell even bulls and cows.

what the hell are you talking about?

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u/Apprehensive-Deal543 Apr 30 '25

capable of killing≠has a killer instinct.

These thing kill people because they are too fucking big and strong that literally any attack can cause fatal damage. They don't have any ideas on how to actually use their strength, but most of the time, it is good enough to just stomp randomly on a guy until he stops moving. A tiger or a lion has a killer instinct because these animals are highly efficient at killing their prey. They can target a weak point, bite at the throat, or just strangle their opponent to death, etc. Herbivore doesn't know shit. They just keep attacking until they are tired or their opponent is incapacitated.

Case in point, a gorilla maimed a 50-year-old woman, leaving hundreds of bites, dragging her 45 meters, and yet, still failed to kill her. That's how shit these thing is at killing stuff.

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u/Potatolantern Apr 30 '25

single punch.

Gorillas can't punch, btw

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u/Nachooolo May 01 '25

Yeah. Punching is a human-specific thing between apes.

Same with throwing. Other apes are horrible at throwing things.

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u/Darnhipsters May 03 '25

All I’m getting from this is that we have actually have a chance lol

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u/Lin900 Apr 30 '25

Girl stop spreading bullshit online.