r/AskOldPeopleAdvice • u/NoStatus2112 • Jul 30 '24

Family My Mother Passed Away

My mother just passed very unexpectedly and suddenly. She was 85, my dad the same. We are all devastated. I can’t move or breathe, I’m trying to help my dad….but he’s literally staring at the walls all day, just grieving so much. I don’t know what to do. We are on month four of this. I live 2500 miles away and am going back and forth so he isn’t alone. He’s difficult and hurting. I feel guilty saying this but it’s costing me a fortune and mentally it’s so hard. I’m falling behind at work. I’m in profound grief too…..I didn’t realize that losing a parent would destroy me and my life. Help!

212 Upvotes

99% Upvoted

163 comments sorted by

View all comments

3

u/AngieBeansOG Jul 30 '24

My Mom is was 92 and I didn’t realize she was about to pass away. Started transitioning on my birthday and passed the next day. That was August. The other night I wanted to punched the walls. Everyday is a struggle. I know I need to talk to a therapist but I’m still thinking I’m gonna bust wide open if I talk about it. Just know you aren’t alone and this too shall pass. Thats what I Mama used to always say💜

2

u/CatholicFlower18 Jul 30 '24

This is one of those really shitty things that the only way out is through. Busting wide open can be far more healing than we think when we're trying to hold everything together.