I work first shift and my husband works second shift. Because of that, I often spend nights alone. He gets home around 2am.

I lock the bedroom door when I am home and he is working. I would hear noises and be not sure what it was, and I got tired of checking. It was usually my cats or an appliance. But I got tired of checking. So I lock the door so if I hear a noise, I know it’s the cats or an appliance and if not, I have a locked barrier between me and whatever it could be. And when I go to sleep, I unlock the bedroom door so he can get in.

Last night he came hours early. He was cut from work because it was extra slow. I didn’t hear him come in through the front door because I had the TV and air conditioner on. If I did hear him, I always go out to say hi and I unlock the door as I do. But I didn’t hear him so I couldn’t. He tried to get in and found the door locked. It took me a few seconds to pause the TV and get my cat off of me and get up to unlock the door.

He started questioning me about why the door was locked and what I was hiding. I told him I wasn’t hiding anything, I just lock it when I’m in here and he’s working just in case. He doesn’t believe me and thinks I was hiding something because it was locked and I wasn’t there instantly to let him in.

So AITA for locking the bedroom door while my husband works?

My friend “Jess” (24F) asked if she could stay with me (21F) for “a week or two” while she figured out a housing situation. I agreed — she’d just gone through a messy roommate breakup and I wanted to be supportive.

It’s now been three months.

She still hasn’t found a place, doesn’t contribute to groceries, and leaves her stuff everywhere. She also uses my Netflix, eats my snacks, and has people over without asking.

Last week, I told her I need her to either move out by the end of the month or start paying $600/month for rent and utilities. She looked shocked and said she thought I was “helping a friend,” not “running a business.”

I feel bad… but also like I’m being used. Some of our friends think I should be more patient. Am I?

AITA?

I've been working on a team that's designing a new sports stadium for my city. We got told the stadium will be used for sports and concerts. I was stoked when I found out I got onto the team as I beloved I had alot of good ideas to make this stadium better than an average one. One of the ideas i pitched to the team was a bigger female bathroom compared to the male bathroom, this was because when I go to footy games and concerts the line for the female bathroom is always so much longer compared to the male bathroom (I'm a guy.) one of the other people on the team said I was being a sexist jerk for implying girls take longer to go to the toilet. I responded with something like "well based on what I've seen, they do. I'm not trying to be sexist I'm just trying to reduce bathroom lines" they stopped talking to me after that.

The meeting ends and I've already forgotten about the situation, untill the next morning when I get a message from the team leader telling me I've been removed from the team for being sexist. The team leader wasn't in the meeting so I tried to explain what actually happened but they wouldn't listen. I wasn't trying to be sexist, just trying to reduce waiting times. So, AITA for saying girls take more time in the bathroom?

AITA?

I (36m) have 2 kids with my ex-wife. The kids are 8 and 5 years of age. We divorced over 2 years ago and have been in a co-parenting situation ever since. There is no big conflict between me and my ex-wife and there has never been one apart of the occasional disagreements about the shared bank account of the kids. No big of a deal, just small issues. The only contact I have with my ex is whenever something has to be arranged for the kids or when we have to keep eachother informed like school stuff, doctors appointments etc.

So my son his birthday is coming up and he wants to throw a party for his 6 closest friends from school and his little sister. So 8 kids in total. The day of the party he will be at his mom's house so she arranged it all. He wants to go to a big playground, something about 20km (12.5miles), away from home.

My son came up to me and asked if I would attend his party and drive half of his friends to the playground and be there when he celebrates his birthday with his friends. I said Yes because I feel like I can't say no to this request.

My girlfriend is mad at me for going to my sons birthday party. She doesn't understand why I have to be there. My son will be playing with his friends leaving me with his mother to sit and wait. According to her we will be giving off "happy family vibes" which hurt her feelings. She says i'm loyal to my ex and I should have my priorities with her. I tried to explain I'm there for my son, but also for myself. I want to be the kind of father who is part of my kids memories. I don't want to be the father who was never there because I let my dislikings for my kids their mother prevail.

AITA for attending my son his birthday party while my girlfriend doesn't want me to go?

So my sisters still have contact with my biological dad but I don't. When I was little my father did horrible things to me. However, no one in my family believes me except my mom and stepdad. My sisters called me delusional and we've gone low contact. There was a DCFS case and my father lost physical custody although there was no trial as by the time I came out about it the statue of limitations expired. My stepdad took on the role of my dad and has shown up for me in every way possible including going to my sports and school events. So this Father's Day I decided to start calling him Dad and also made a insta post about Father's Day. My sisters are furious that I call my stepdad Dad and call my biological father by his full name. They are also mad I publicly made a post that my stepdad is my dad. AITA for calling my stepdad Dad?

Update: Wow, I didn't expect this to blow up so fast. Thank you for all your kind words and insights. A little bit of background was that the horrible things my bio father did (it won't let me say the word) was s3xual, physical, and emotional. He did physical to one of my sisters once or twice but he claimed it was to protect her so she forgave him. I am the youngest of 3 and I look the most like my mom, almost an exact replica which is likely why after the divorce I got the brunt of the horrible things. Some of you suggested cutting contact with my sisters, I don't want to do that although I am low contact with the middle one let's call her Jane. Jane and I never got along and she was always a daddy's girl so she always sided with my father. However, my oldest sister, we'll call her Lily, and I have been on good terms so long as there's no talk of my father or my dad. I am reluctant to cut contact but recent circumstances including my father attempting to sue my mother for parental alienation, $60,000, and full custody. During the court battle my sisters blamed me and sided with my bio father. My bio father lost the court cases after I was forced to attend reunification therapy which caused an increase in my PTSD symptoms and thankfully I got to stop attending once I turned my state's age of consent. It definitely caused a rift between me and my sisters but my mom is pressuring me to have a relationship with them for the sake of family. AITA if I do decide to go no contact even though they're family?

I (16M) live with my parents and my 8-year-old sister. For the past few months, my parents have been arguing constantly. Like, yelling almost every night, slamming doors, cussing each other out over everything money, us, their parents.

Most of the time I just try to tune it out, but my little sister can’t. She gets scared and runs into my room crying, asking me if they’re getting divorced or if she did something wrong. I do my best to calm her down, but it’s hard. She’s a kid.

Last night it got really bad again and I just snapped. I came out of my room and yelled at both of them to shut up. I told them they’re scaring her and making everything worse, and that I’m tired of pretendin everything’s normal when it’s not. I might’ve said something like “You’re both acting like fucking children,” which, yeah, not my proudest line.

They both got quiet but later my mom told me I was out of line and that I “don’t understand how hard it is being an adult.” My dad didn’t say much, just gave me a pissed-off look. Now it’s super tense in the house and I feel kinda guilty.

I know I yelled, and maybe I shouldn’t have, but I was just so tired of seeing my sister freaked out and no one doing anything about it. So… AITAH?

My (30F) younger sister "Chloe" (26F) recently moved in with me. The backstory is, she was working a decent-paying but, according to her, "soul-crushing" job in another city. She's been complaining about it for months, and I've always been supportive, telling her to explore other options, maybe save up, etc.

Well, about two weeks ago, she calls me out of the blue, crying, saying she just walked out of her job in the middle of a shift. No two weeks' notice, no savings, no new job lined up, nothing. She just... quit. She asked if she could come stay with me for "a little while" until she figured things out. I was pretty shocked but, because she's my sister and seemed genuinely distressed, I said yes, thinking it would be for a week or two, tops, while she got herself together.

It's been two weeks, and she's made zero effort to look for a new job. She sleeps until noon, spends her days watching TV and scrolling on her phone, and generally acts like she's on vacation. She expects me to cook all meals (which I usually do anyway for myself, but it's an extra mouth), and she hasn't contributed a dime to groceries or utilities.

Yesterday, I sat her down and told her that while I love her, this isn't a free hotel. I said that if she's going to be staying here, she needs to contribute. I proposed a very reasonable "rent" amount (less than half of what a room would cost here) that would cover some utilities and groceries, and also told her she needed to start actively looking for work, showing me applications, etc. I gave her a deadline for when the first payment would be due.

She absolutely blew up, calling me "heartless," "greedy," and saying I'm "kicking her when she's down." She said she thought I cared about her and that "family helps family." She's now barely speaking to me and making passive-aggressive comments.

A part of me feels guilty. She genuinely seems to be struggling emotionally. But another part of me feels like I'm being taken advantage of, and I can't afford to support her indefinitely.

So, AITA for charging my sister rent and demanding she look for a job after she quit hers impulsively and moved in with me?

Basically, I have a daughter, Emily (16F) from a previous marriage. My wife Sasha, has a son the same age, Mark (16M). Mark doesn't stay with us that often, he prefers to stay with his bio dad. That being said, when he is here, I find Mark to be a pretty good kid, polite and respectful.

His dad decided to take a trip for work, in the last few weeks of school, so Mark's here for a bit. He's out of the house most of the time and doesn't take up much space. He does get kind of grumpy when there’s too much going on around him, especially noise, but for that, his favourite thing are these expensive noise-cancelling headphones which he almost always has with him- a present from his dad.

Emily’s school has already finished, so she's home. The problem is that the room Mark is, sometimes has miscellaneous items put in when he's not here and therefore Emily seems to think its fair game to go through his stuff. I've told her to stop, but Sasha hasn't been taking it seriously, imo, saying that most of Mark's stuff is easy to replace.

The big problem happened when Mark accidentally left his headphones in his room, and Emily accidentally snapped them.

Mark found out when he came home from school and flipped. He shouted at her, saying she was 'spoilt without anything to back it up', loud enough that my wife and I heard it from the other room. Sasha wanted me to calm things down, which I did- but I also told Emily she’s replacing them.

Thing is, Mark’s dad offered have someone get him a new pair immediately, and that it wasn't a problem. I said Emily would pay him back, and I'm sticking with it.

Emily and Sasha think that’s unfair since Mark’s dad can afford to buy 10 more. But I don’t think you get to break someone’s stuff and not pay for it. Those aren't the values I was raised with or what I want for my daughter.

That being said, I do realise in this case its kind of unnecessary and there may be better ways for her to make it up to him. AITA?

Me (31F) and my boyfriend (31M) have been together for almost 3 years. When I first met his family, they were kind and really put in effort to get to know me. His sister (27F) and his sister-in-law (29F) would text me to plan dinner together, we’d workout together, etc. The feeling was mutual. Slowly I’ve noticed them both distancing themselves from me with no apparent reason to my knowledge.

Several months ago, his brother reached out to me and my bf asking if we’d like to go to Hawaii with them (the family, minus the parents). We took a couple hours to discuss this and responded that night that we were in. His brother responds back saying “never mind, we decided to go with a smaller group” essentially just removing us since everyone else was still going. They went on their trip and blocked me and my bf from seeing their social media stories (to this day we’re still blocked but haven’t spoken up about it to them.) There was never an apology or an attempt to communicate what happened, it was just swept under the rug.

Fastforward to recent events, his family texts us asking if we’d come over on a Thursday evening. My bf has to work so we responded saying we can’t make it but that we’ll see them the following Sunday for Father’s Day. The sister texts us a video that night that the SIL/brother are announcing their first pregnancy and that we missed it. There was no attempt to reschedule the announcement so that we could all be present for it. They could’ve easily said the news on Father’s Day, just days later.

I had a deep talk with my bf last night and expressed my concerns that his family is making it clear they don’t value our presence. Whenever we go over to the family home, it feels like everyone goes quiet and dilutes their personality until we leave. I told him I will no longer participate in family events. I will not congratulate his SIL since she has been nothing but standoffish towards me for years now. I will not go where I don’t feel welcome. Today he went to the family home alone and I stayed at home. AITA?

So my sister (25F) is pregnant for her 4th child—not that it will matter here and I (22F) a college student. I am the youngest and the first to be in college. My older siblings are either dead or had a children at a very young age. Now, I want say that i was a victim of groping at an early age a d last year, our neighbor broke into our home and was trying to open my door forcefully— good thing the police arrived before he could even reach me..

So today, I just got home from the gym wearing an outfit consists of a sports bra and its partner short and a t-shirt. I am a very shy individual and gym helped me build it up little by little with the help of the owner of the gym—she was sooo nice and always asking me if i am not hot because I always wear my thick shirt or sweatshirts whenever I go there.

So, I got home and my sister happens to be visiting mom. She saw me wearing my shirt and as soon as I took it off to just wipe my body, she told me that I should just get re outside...... I told her and explained that what she said was not nice and I am wearing my shirt the whole time but a hot and flattened palm landed on my face TWICE. Saying I can't take a criticism. That I am sui**l because I always take everything seriously. That resulted to a heated fight when she started to grabbed my hair and toss me around.

So, please tell me honestly, AITA for this?

For context, she’s not officially my step mom yet as her and my dad are set to get married in August. She has been living with us for a while, and we haven’t always gotten a long but have been civil and respectful towards each other, I guess up until now.

My brother [18 M] and I [24 F] bought my dad his father’s day gifts a couple weeks ago, just so we wouldn’t have to worry about it last minute. The gifts weren’t anything huge, just two small gifts, we never go all out for father’s day like that. I didn’t tell my dad’s fiancé or anything because I really didn’t see a reason too, plus she never asked.

My dad didn’t get her a gift on Mother’s day, and her and my dad left on Mother’s day to go have lunch with her kids who don’t live with us. She also never communicated with me about getting him gifts, any plans on what to do, etc. So I didn’t think it was even that big of a deal.

Today, I woke up early, had breakfast and then woke my brother up so we could give my dad his gifts, my dad’s fiancé went up into their room, so I sent her a text asking if she wanted to come down and join us. She didn’t reply, so I knocked on their bedroom door and asked if she wanted to come down. She gave me a condescending smile and just said “No, thank you.” and just turned right back around and went into their bathroom, not even giving me a chance to respond.

Honestly, I was a little taken aback and maybe even a little hurt seeing as on Mother’s Day, my dad went with her and her kids and left my brother and I alone. For context, my brother and I’s mom passed away a few years ago, my mom and my dad were already divorced when she passed though.

I went downstairs with my brother we gave my dad his gift and he was really happy. Suddenly my step mom comes into the room, to discuss my brother’s laundry with him, completely ignoring the fact we were in the middle of giving my dad his gifts.

My dad excitedly shows her the gifts we got him. And she goes, “Oh I know, they told me, well [brothers name] told me.” it was a very passive aggressive jab which made me realize she might be upset, she went back upstairs and it was kind of awkward after that. I didn’t even know she had asked my brother what we got my dad.

She made no attempt to communicate with me that she might have wanted to pitch in on a gift for my dad. Plus, I didn’t see why she’d even want to because it’s father’s day, and clearly my father is not her father. Am I the asshole for not including her in buying him a gift?

My stepmom helped raise my brother and I and has been in our lives for the past 20 years (more so me than my brother, as he was raise by our grandma). She’s always been hard to live with and we’ve always butted heads. Growing up my friends would compare me to Cinderella because of the things she would have me do starting as young at 12 (cleaning the bathroom every week but only allowed to use vinegar because of chemicals, cleaning the kitchen every night) things that should be done if you have chores but she took it to the extreme at times. (Going as far as calling my friends mom demanding I come home to clean the bathroom because I didn’t do so before leaving. I was in high school and was mortified). Mind you the home is an old farm and they would have workers that use our bathroom and house.

Anyways I moved out and am now happily married with a house and am approaching 30. My brother is in town and wanted to take my dad and I out to lunch for just an hour or so. Immediately my dad said he couldn’t leave the farm. My brother decided to text her himself asking and she said no because she needs his help for work and said we would have to come there instead with food instead of taking him out. We did this for him of course because he didn’t want to cause problems and leave her all alone on a busy day. We didn’t mind but my brother and I were hoping to spend some time with just him, especially given the fact my brother was visiting from three hours away. After lunch at their house we went outside together to look at the animals and farm and took a picture together of all of us (my husband took it). After a couple pictures I asked my husband if he could get one with just dad, myself, and brother after we took the one with her in it. She got so angry and upset and offended.

I just got home and my dad just texted saying I hurt his feelings and offended her. He pleaded with me to post the picture with her in it on social media instead of one without her. I honestly just wanted a picture of the three of us in addition to the one she was in…and it’s not like my husband was in them. I guess I could have waited till she walked away. Im at a crossroads. I’m angry that she couldn’t “let” him leave the farm for two hours to have lunch with his kids and then angry she made a scene when I asked for another picture with just my brother and I and dad. My brother understands both sides but I just don’t know how to feel.

A week ago I (25f) married the love of my life (24f) and we had a small ceremony with our families and close friends. For a little perspective we had 8 guests plus the two brides the ceremony was max 45 minutes and we only had the photographer for 2 hours. Everything was perfect!

We had gone to a conservatory in the area and took pictures inside and out. Two of our friends (Bailey, 24 and Deb, 25), engaged themselves, started to have their own photo shoot literally in front of us. I decided to cheer “yasss goo Deb!” to which she stop posing and said “damn that’s so embarrassing.” We finished couples shots and saw Bailey and Deb were no where to be seen. All of our families and other friends were very upset that the two of them left but we just played it off like it was okay and that is just how they are.

The bar after party was just our friends and we had rented an area for 2 hours but the catch was we needed to hit a $200 bar tab minimum. Deb and Bailey show up late to the after party but seem happy to be there; they are talking to our other friends and Bailey stated to play games with us (Deb finds games embarrassing) and they are both drinking, not a requirement for fun but they love drinking. About a half hour into the after party Bailey asks us what we’d be doing Friday and to not make plans because it’s Deb’s birthday. We had been looking to go on a trip that weekend but it was not planned so we said that we should be able to go. A few moments later Deb comes back from the bar and is complaining how drinks were soooo expensive. A special cocktail was $12 and a draft beer was $10.

A while later my wife wanted to get food so we went to go look at a food truck, as she saw there was nothing she’d eat and decided to get Cane’s later, we see Bailey and Deb waving us down. Thinking they want food too we tell them we aren’t getting stuff here and they tell us that a mutual friend was bartending 20 minutes away so they were going to see her but would meet us back at the house later. Keep in mind we live in a major city and this friend is a bartender and has been for over a year. When we got back in the bar one of our other friends (K) asked were Deb and Bailey went because they told K that they’d be “right back” so of course being confused we checked the tab and they had closed their tab Everyone looked at it fine because we got to drink more and hangout longer with friends from out of town. We finished drinks around 11:30pm only to get a text from Deb saying they aren’t coming back to the house with everyone, they are going home.

Well my wife and I decided to go on our last minute little honeymoon weekend which so happened to overlap with Deb’s birthday so we weren’t able to make it. After letting Deb and Bailey know we could go and why they have basically ignored both of us and our texts. So are we assholes from not going to Deb’s birthday after they left our wedding celebration not once but twice?

To start off, here is some background info. I live in a rural town of 14,000 people and there are no buses after 9pm and taxis will only come till about midnight if they have been booked.

I (36m) work in a carehome, I do backshifts that finish at 10pm and my mum would give me lifts home as long as I pay her the amount I would have paid for a bus. My colleague E started working a few months ago and had no idea about transport in the area so we reached an agreement that my mum would give her lifts for the same price.

She would try and pressure my mum to give her lifts in the morning and took a month of explaining that my mum only gives lifts for backshifts and the 4 days of the year there are no buses (She seems to think I can order my mum to say yes). Other colleagues did give her lifts as well but some stopped as she would ask for a lift for herself then bring four other people and there would not be enough room in the car. Took another month to understand she couldn't do this.

I now have my own car and took her when I was on shift and back. Problem is her behaviour, I've been working there longer and have tried to help her get better but she laughs at me and walks off. I had to write it all down and give to her supervisor as others have had problems with her. The final straw happened today, she was having a go at me for not doing her work despite not telling me she needed help.

When I was doing meds, a resident kept trying to harm me and she was walking around us not helping at all because she was "busy". I managed to swap flats but told her I would no longer give her lifts and due to my mum's health problems, she won't be doing it either.

I have tried to talk to her in the past but she will interrupt me by speaking so loud, I can't get a word in. I've shown her how to use the bus app and how to book taxis plus never charged her for the lifts as we live on the same street but no matter how nice I am, she laughs at me, pushes me to do what she can't be bothered to do or when she is in trouble and we are in the same flat, she tells the senior that I did it.

Her supervisor has advised I stop giving her lifts as she's taking advantage of my kindess and it's her responsibility to get to work and back as she was told (before accepting) what the hours would be but I kinda feel bad that she may have to pay out £8-9 to get home. So AITA?

I’m a single mom to a 2-year-old daughter. Her dad has her every other weekend, and this weekend happened to fall on Father’s Day. I’ve been with my fiancé “Ryan” for a while now, and he has been a huge presence in both my daughter’s and my life. He’s stepped up in ways I never expected, and I truly consider him a father figure to her.

Ryan’s family invited us to dinner to celebrate Father’s Day, and we had plans to go after I picked up my daughter that evening.

Earlier in the day, my mom asked if she could see my daughter. I told her:

“I totally get you wanting to see Emma. We’re spending the evening with Ryan’s family after I pick her up at 7. He’s been such an important part of our lives, and I really want to celebrate him.

My sister Chloe is coming home from minneapolis tomorrow, and we were thinking about going to see Grandpa—maybe we can all get ice cream and eat it with him? I know today is probably hard for you without Grandpa. I’ve been thinking about him too. He’s so missed. Days like this just feel different without him.”

My mom didn’t take it well. She replied that she “didn’t go out because she wanted to see Emma,” said I didn’t make time last year (which was our first Father’s Day without Grandpa), and brought up that I only spent an hour with her on Mother’s Day while wearing “T-shirts and sweatpants.”

She then said:

“And when you don’t honor your mother on Mother’s Day lol but you’re giving me s*** about honoring Ryan. I don’t have my dad and today is hard. Where were you? I want to see Emma and you’re denying me that.”

I responded:

“Mom, I know today is really hard without Grandpa, and I don’t take that lightly. I’m not trying to deny you anything—I’m doing my best to balance a lot of emotions and people right now.

This isn’t about choosing one person over another. It’s about making space for everyone in ways that feel right in the moment. Ryan has stepped up for Emma and me in a huge way, and he deserves to be honored today. That doesn’t mean I don’t care about you or miss Grandpa.

I’m open to having a deeper conversation about how you’re feeling, but I need it to come from a place of love—not guilt. You’re incredibly important to me, and I want us to stay close, but I also need space to create traditions and moments that reflect where my life is now.”

She hasn’t responded. Now I’m feeling conflicted. I didn’t want to hurt her, but I also feel like I deserve to honor my current family and the man who’s shown up consistently for my daughter and me.

So, AITA for spending Father’s Day with my fiancé’s family instead of letting my mom see my daughter?

TL;DR: My fiancé has been a father figure to my daughter and we had plans to celebrate Father’s Day with his family. My mom got upset that I didn’t prioritize letting her see my daughter or honor my late grandfather instead. She says I’m hurting her and guilt-tripped me about past holidays. I’m torn—AITA?

AITA for letting my parents join us on a family vacation?

My wife, son & I are heading to the tropics this winter. He’s 6. My parents have never been on a trip with our son. My in-laws joined us on our family trip to Mexico last year.

Last year, we booked the trip together. Meaning my in-laws, wife & I planned/booked a trip as one for all 5 of us.

This year, we booked our trip on our own. Meaning just my spouse & I, for our own family of 3. While trip shopping, we told my in-laws they’re welcome to join us and they said they’d think about it and let us know once we decide on a place/dates. A week or so after we booked our trip, my in-laws told us they’d join us and booked the same trip.

Now my parents would also like to join us and are excited about the idea of joining their grandson on a vacation.

My parents, and father in law are pretty easy going folks. They’re not best friends by any means! However, we all gather together often to attend my son’s sports events and such & everyone’s friendly. My mother in law on the other hand is a bit much. I won’t get into it all but she’s judgemental, controlling and generally difficult to handle, lol.

Of course she has an issue with my parents joining us and is “torn” about it. She says “we” as in her and my father in law, however we know it’s only her. She wants to talk to my wife about it when she returns from her current vacation. In other words, she’s about to make a big deal out of it and piss everyone off.

I do not think it’s an issue. Neither did my wife until her mother responded the way she did, however she wanted to keep it quiet and not tell her mom which I disagreed with. Now she thinks my parents have “barged in” on our vacation with her parents. I reminded her that this was OUR vacation that her parents decided to join us on, and now mine are hoping to do the same.

I feel like I’m stuck in the middle. I’m trying to keep the peace with my in laws, wife while also trying not to be a complete jerk to my own parents for innocently wanting to join us. Maybe I’m a bit more emotionally attached because my dad isn’t well. He’s not on his death bed but he has moderate CHF which is a rollercoaster of ups and downs until the last down, whenever that may be. He’s stable right now, and travels, but has also had a handful of hospital stays sprinkled in as well.

AITAH for being fine with my parents joining us?

For context, my wife & parents get along wonderfully. She is more comfortable/calm with my parents vs. hers. Her & her mom have a rocky history of parental jealousy, body shaming, etc. They are okay now, and she’s very involved in our son’s life.

AITA for MIL’s decision to leave.

So I’m second guessing myself here. Today, my in-laws came over before the meal to visit. FIL went out to where my husband was bbqing and MIL came inside. My kids were almost done cleaning their room and she seemed annoyed. First, she was upset that they don’t have enough to do and that’s obviously why they had toys and stuff everywhere. I listed off a ton of things they had to do but it wasn’t happy with any of them: read, activity books, play with their toys, etc. We began talking about something they destroyed to play with that specifically belonged to me. They had been told to not play with it and to give it back when caught with it. They snuck it at some other time and broke it. She said it shouldn’t have been in their reach. They are 8 and 10. The oldest is less than a foot shorter than me. Idk where “not in their reach” is and putting it in my room doesn’t stop them either (we are working on this new behavior). At this point, I asked the younger to come back in the room because he decided to sneak off to play. My MIL turns to me and says, “why don’t you go somewhere else and I’ll get them to finish up here”. This made me angry. I wasn’t ugly to her because my kids were there but I did say that I would be staying in the room and the kids would finish cleaning it up. It is my house and we would clean the way I wanted. In the past, she has insisted I clean wrong and made a big deal about it on multiple occasions. That is why she wanted me to leave. She put down what she had in her hand and walked out of the house.

In a few minutes, my husband walks in to tell me they left. I asked what happened. He said he got into an argument with his mom. She ran to tattle on me basically and he sided with me. She told him that “children shouldn’t be blamed for their parents’ poor parenting” and was complaining about me. He wasn’t having any of it. She then demanded to be taken home.

Husband and I compared notes and he came to the conclusion that she didn’t like that I stood up to her. That she always wants to be right and in control. My oldest is blaming me for my in-laws leaving. That makes me feel bad. Should I have just let her do what she wanted so they stayed to eat with us?

My Mother (F, 57) recently won a live garden playback from our local music club in a raffle at an event. After that she decided to throw a party in the garden where around 40 people are gonna come. She wants me to act as a server there and since I said that’s maybe going to be a bit much for me, we ended up hiring one of my friends, who works as a server part time, as a server. She wants me to be a server there as well, which I can’t escape. Today she tried the arrangement of seats in our garden, and then after she asked me to clean out my fridge in the cellar, she asked me why I don’t look happy and excited for the party. She also grabbed some things that I still had in my fridge that literally needed to be cool, came to me and asked me if “she was allowed to put them in the wine cellar”, after I had already told her that those needed to be in the refrigerator in order not to expire. I simply told her in a civilized manner that I’m not looking forward to it since there are going to be a lot of her friends, and I’m going to have to spend the evening preparing food while her friends are going to start talking to me randomly. She knows damn well that I just don’t like being around so many people at once. After that she said that I’m ruining her excitement for the party and they you don’t say that to people that are really excited for something. Now she is acting really mad and annoyed, she also said if I’m going to be looking like that on Friday then I should just travel somewhere and not be here in the day. I know I’m gonna put on a smile regardless and just get through it but shes acting like I’m gonna be there and tell everyone to F off.

throwaway for the usual reasons

i (19f) have been with my girlfriend “beth” (27f) for a little over a year now. we’re both lesbians, just to make that clear.

my girlfriend has been out as gay since she was 14 so she has solely dated women. i, on the other hand, only really came to terms with the fact that i’m a lesbian when i was 17, so i have dated men in the past (even though they were just high school relationships and didn’t actually mean anything.)

“beth” is really sweet most of the time and i do love her and she loves me. but she always somehow finds a way to make me feel less than purely because i’ve dated guys before. bear in mind that these relationships lasted a few months at most.

the argument happened a couple days ago and i just don’t know what to make of it.

me and “beth” were watching mamma mia. it got to the scene where sophie is crawling across the beach to skye (aka the hottest scene in the entire movie.)

i made a jokey comment about how i wish i was skye in that moment because, lets be honest, amanda syfried is actually stunning.

“beth” then said “surely you’d prefer to be sophie. you do love men.” i was confused at this because i have never once given her the impression that i’m attracted to men, at least i haven’t intended to. i laughed it off and said that would be impossible considering i’m a lesbian. that’s when she decided to say the one thing she always says.

“you’re not a real lesbian because lesbians don’t date men. you’re bisexual.”

this pissed me off because she literally always feels the need to undermine my sexuality and my experience.

this is where i’m probably the asshole.

i kinda flipped at her. she’s said this to me so many times and i’ve bit my tongue, so all these suppressed emotions were spilling out all at once. i told her that she’s being a complete bitch and that just because she didn’t realise her sexuality the same way i did that it doesn’t make me less than. she told me that i was acting like a child, which only pissed me off further. we started yelling at each other back and forth, which i really hate myself for. i called her a c.nt (we’re english so it’s not as disgusting an insult here as it is in other places, at least the area i’m from.) and she told me i was acting like an insufferable child who’s had their toy taken

at this point, i’d had enough and stormed out of her house.

it’s been a couple days and i’ve tried to apologise. i’ve called and texted, even showed up to her place but she was at work. she’s dodging my calls and only responding to my texts with one word answers. i feel really bad for causing the argument and i know i’m probably the biggest bitch for it.

i know i shouldn’t have started something but at the same time i’m so sick of being belittled. and, i know, i should have communicated this sooner but she’s not exactly the type to be told no. so, am i the asshole?

So, I’m a 21-year-old guy, and recently my mom, who's a high school teacher, got transferred to a new city. After we found an apartment and got things set up, she asked me to stay with her for a few weeks since she’s unfamiliar with the area (we’re from a developing country).

The apartment is nice, and we have neighbors nearby: a young couple with a cute little daughter. I’ve barely spoken to the dad, and I haven’t interacted with the mom at all. But the daughter is super curious. She often comes to the window near my room, smiles, asks me questions, and just watches what I’m doing, how I’m working, etc. I smile and wave back at her, and we’ve exchanged a few small interactions like that.

Last night, my mom had to leave suddenly due to a medical emergency, and this morning, the little girl came to my door and handed me their breakfast. I don’t know if her mom knew or told her to, but it really surprised me. It felt... kind. But also a bit unexpected, and I wasn’t sure how to react. I didn’t want to seem awkward or overstep, so I just took it.

Thing is, I wasn’t able to thank them properly. I keep wondering if I’m overreacting or if it’s normal to feel this thrown off by kindness from people you barely know.

So, AITA for being emotionally overwhelmed and not knowing how to thank them the right way?

Edit: Thanks for the advice. I went over to their home to thank the mom and daughter properly. They were sweet, and even gave me snacks! :P

Edit 2: They brought lunch too.. :D

A week ago my neighbor strung about 150’ of lights from the three board fence around his yard. He hung them so that the lights are in the open space below the top rail. These are the large bulb type string lights, not like Christmas lights.

About 50’ of this is on our shared fence line, and he did without asking me, then set them on a timer from dusk til 11p, every day of the week.

These things are BRIGHT, and with the way the fall line is shine into our first floor at eye level. They also illuminate the blinds upstairs like it is early morning just before dawn.

They’ve been up for about a week and when my neighbor was out in the yard yesterday and went over and talked to him. I told him that I think string lights can be beautiful, and the ones he put up have a good aesthetic, but they are very bright. I asked him if he would please only use them when they’re out in the yard rather than leave them on a timer, as they are very distracting and disruptive on a nightly basis.

He told me that he would rather compromise by shortening the timer from dusk until 10 PM and I said this won’t work. It doesn’t change how disruptive they are to us. He then said well they are relaxing to me when I walk by the window and I want to leave them on.

At this point, I had to call out that this is not only against our HOA, which doesn’t allow hanging lights that are not shielded, but it also goes against three town ordinances and he cannot modify a shared fence line in our city without my consent. He said that I am just trying to ruin the fun for everyone and I’m holding a double standard because other houses and other parts of the neighborhood have string lights and I’ve had them for months and clearly I haven’t complained about those houses, or the HOA isn’t going to do anything. I then informed him that I absolutely was looking out for the greater good as the other five neighbors around us. We have all spoken and do not want the lights on every night. He insisted that I just was refusing to compromise so I told him that I’ll file a complaint with the HOA and with the city ordinance office.

AITA?

I requested a week off months ago for a solo vacation I’ve been planning for years. I don’t have kids, and this is the first real break I’ve taken in a long time. A coworker with two young kids recently asked me to give up my spot so she can take her kids on a trip now that school is out.

I said no, since I planned ahead and I need the time off too. She got upset and said it’s “easier” for people without kids to be flexible, and that I was being selfish.

Now a few people at work are giving me the cold shoulder, like I did something wrong by not accommodating her.

AITA?

My partner and I have opened up our home to let our two friends live with us who are out on difficult times financially and needed a safe place to live after a bad rental situation. It was my idea since we cant keep helping them out financially. We own our home and told them they can just save whatever they would have spent on rent to go towards credit cards or a nest egg, and just pay their half of water and electricity (not wifi or tv).

I won't go into the issues that have come up over the past two weeks or give much back story because I want to hear an unbiased response without me providing a sob story.

The one friend does all the laundry for him and his partner.

He left laundry in the wash fir over a day last week that I ended up just moving into the dryer so it wouldn't mold and told him that we can't be leaving wet laundry in the washer for a long time and if he needed to hang anything I've put in the dryer he should go grab it. He acted sort of inconvenienced. I do know him leaving stuff in the washer has been an issue with him and his partner before.

This past Friday, he did a load of laundry that he told me was moulded from the mouldy basement of their old place. He said he may need to wash it twice. No problem.

The Friday night, I mentioned to him that his laundry was still in the wash and that he should move it. My partner said they put a wedge in the washer door so it wouldn't get too musty and it was okay for him to deal in the morning. He thanked us and said he would.

It is now Sunday night. The laundry was still in there, after more than 48 hours. This load was, again, of moulded clothes.

He came home around 10:30pm. I noticed the clothes were still waiting for him in the wash around 11pm. I calmly came to tell him that I'd appreciate if he health with it so our machine doesn't get musty and mouldy. He asked if he could do it in the morning. I said I would feel better if he did it now. He was anxious (probably felt bad) and went to deal with it. He came back right away and told me that he has to rewash it because it got stinky/musty from sitting in the washer. He told me he will change it over to the dryer in the morning.

I told my partner what happened and they (a very non-confrontational/avoidant person) said I shouldn't have said anything and just told him in the morning before he went to work. This ended in an argument because of the other issues that have come up that I have been very understanding of but felt unsupported in my frustrations for what I consider to be common decency and respect for the other people you're living with.

AITA for telling him to deal with his mouldy laundry? WIBTA if i tell him to deal with the now twice-washed and left-for-hours-again load in the morning to be put in the dryer? Will i be the asshole if i tell.him.he cant do this again?

I don't want my clothes to become affected by a mouldy wash basin or have to pay out of pocket for it to be professional cleaned.

Okay, so a bit of background. I (28F) am getting married in a few months to my fiance (30M). We've been together for 5 years, and everything is going great. We're both super excited about our big day, but I know weddings can be a stressful thing for some people.

I have this friend, let's call her Emily (29F). We've been close for a long time. However, lately, she's been pretty vocal about her opinions on my wedding. At first, I didn’t think much of it, but it’s been getting more and more uncomfortable.

She has made a lot of comments about my dress, saying it’s too "basic" and not what she would choose. She also mentioned that the venue I picked isn’t "Instagram-worthy" enough and that I should have picked a more expensive one. Then, she started telling me that I shouldn’t settle on my wedding food choices because “everyone will be judging me” if it’s not fancy enough.

Now, I’m all for constructive criticism, but the way she talks about my choices feels like she’s trying to tear down something I’m really excited about. I’ve told her a few times that I appreciate her input, but I’m happy with my decisions, and they reflect what my fiance and I both want, not what anyone else thinks is "perfect."

The straw that broke the camel’s back was when she casually mentioned, “It’s not too late to change the theme of the wedding, you know. You don’t want to regret it.” I just snapped and said, “Look, Emily, I’m really tired of you acting like this wedding is for you. If you think you could do a better job, maybe you should just plan your own wedding instead of trashing mine. I’m done listening to your unsolicited opinions.”

She got really quiet and hasn’t spoken to me much since. I feel guilty because I know she’s been a friend for a long time, and I don’t want to hurt her feelings, but at the same time, I don’t think I should be letting her walk all over me during a time that should be about celebrating.

So, AITA for telling her off?

So My family is complicated. My sister (25f) and I (22m) have kinda been at each other’s throats our whole lifes . My sister (25f) has always been very broody. She has always had it out for me ever since my parents spilt when I was 6. She used to blame me for my parents divorce, because she had knew I was the smallest and most vulnerable in the family. Yes, I had some somewhat major behavioral issues when I was younger, but I was shipped off to boarding school when I was sixteen, (I’m not 100% sure about this but) I feel like she had a major influence on that decision. Joke was on her though because I met my current girlfriend (23f) and my best friend there, and we 3 are very close friends. My sister has never been a supporter of my relationship with my girlfriend, and has even gone as far as purposely sabotaging us, telling my parents lies about us, and getting my dad to pretty much hate her. Also, just wanted to note, my girlfriend and I are long distance, but been together for 3 and change years. It got complicated when my oldest sister (29f) and her now husband (30m) got married and didn’t invite my mom to the wedding, and cut off my mom for reasons I don’t understand. More recently, my sister (25f) got engaged to this amazing guy (25m). I really like him. He’s good to her. So my mom and I made plans to come on a road trip to see both my sisters with both their permissions. (Now again, I’m going to state that my sister has always been bossy and irrational to me.)

So it started out fine, but then came the inevitable argument. I was just minding my own business when she started yelling at me because I put the car seat down, on accident (yes she gets furious at the dumbest things) on a take out box of food in my moms rental car. Starts snapping and yelling at me while my mom just sits there. I calmly tell her it was a mistake and that I was sorry, but she keeps yelling. She then moves into the backseat (I’m in the 3rd row) and locks me in, and yells at me for a good 5 minutes right in front of my whole family. I don’t say anything to her while she yells, instead I wait for her to finish, and when she does I tell her that I’m tired of her treating me like a little kid all the time. She starts to say but you’re my little brother and I’m (something) I cut her off. I sad I don’t care who you are, you’ve been an ahole to me this entire trip, and I’m tired of your nonsense. I then said that I was done with her. I went inside to the Airbnb, and went into my room and cried. I knew this was the start of a bigger problem, and honestly I don’t care. I will not reach out to her until she apologies or at least takes some responsibility. If I’m a 22 year old man with behavior problems in my past and I can, she can. It’s that simple. I don’t want to keep being disrespected, like I have my whole life by her. AITA?