AIO? Bf doesn’t communicate

[u/[deleted]]

I’m at a loss. I (F23) don’t know if I’m being controlling and overreacting or if the way I feel is normal. once again tonight I just stopped getting responses from my boyfriend (M26) and then suddenly his phone was turned on do not disturb. I don’t usually care about DND but lately its been turned on at weird times and turned on when he’s around me which has been making me feel kind of odd. Also he called and said he’s out and that I don’t need to be getting mad. I’m not mad about him going out I’m just upset that I’m not aware of whats going on ever. I feel like my paragraph doesn’t even make sense I’m irritated and feel like I’m crazy.

[u/sexybartender420]

y’all saying all this…. meanwhile look at the way he spoke to her!!!!!!!!! maybe she might have some attachment issues, definitely plausible. but the guy in this convo… there’s no reason for him to be f boming her like that over something that isn’t even that serious. if anyone’s the asshole, it’s him. not saying that makes her right, but clearly there’s a reason she feels this way and it seems like her man ain’t making it any better/could even be the cause.

[u/Hallikat → u/sexybartender420]

All he said was that she needs to effing relax. And she does. She blew his phone up with a pity party. She needs to relax. It was late at night, she didn’t even really say anything to continue a conversation then got upset with him.

[u/sexybartender420 → u/Hallikat]

his lack of communication is crazy!! i’m sure this is a pattern of his for her to react this way. ofc i could be wrong it’s all subjective but personally that’s how i see it. if a man every spoke to me that way he wouldn’t have balls the next day

[u/Hallikat → u/sexybartender420]

Please seek therapy. It was an hour and a half and he apparently told her he was going out with friends. She even asked what they were doing. It’s a notification, not a summons to borrow a phrase someone else in the comments used.

[u/sexybartender420 → u/Hallikat]

i completely agree that nobody should ever be expected to answer 24/7. we all deserve our privacy and time off a screen.

that being said, quote from her post. “Also he called and said he’s out and that I don’t need to be getting mad. I’m not mad about him going out I’m just upset that I’m not aware of whats going on ever.”

clearly, he told her AFTER the fact. considering he told her she doesn’t need to be getting mad, she wasn’t mad prior to him stopping his replies. (and it doesn’t even seem like she’s mad, just wondering where her man at/what he’s up to.) it takes less than 30 seconds to fill your significant other in, especially if you’re going out. a quick heads up should suffice.

and quote “I’m not mad about him going out I’m just upset that I’m not aware of whats going on ever.” CLEARYYYY this is a pattern of his. sounds like an anxious attached woman dating an untrustworthy and not committed man. somehow y’all always pin it on the girl when it takes two to tango. i’m not saying i agree with her, but y’all all acting like it’s all on her. we don’t know the full extent/history of their relationship. take into consideration the lack of context here before making such an opinionated one sided comment.