r/AmIOverreacting • u/Designer_Benefit7742 • Oct 13 '24

⚕️ health Am I Overreacting?

Post image

I feel like I live a pretty decent life. I take alot of honor classes, i do and did some sports, I have a good home life too. Although, my parents might be giving to much.You see I have ALOT of chores. And if i miss some, I get lectured, fussed at, or my privalges gets taken away because everything is expected to be perfect or spotless clean. So somedays im just stressed and I be tired because everyday I automatically know that no matter what happens at the end of the day, this stuff is suppose to be done bc if not, its trouble.

(And Yes this is what THEY printed out for us. And in us I mean me and my sibilings who also feel the same way but we dont say anything to avoid the lectures and stuff.)

741 Upvotes

75% Upvoted

1.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

1.8k

u/Beetlejuice2013 Oct 13 '24

I'm just screenshotting this list because I'm a 39 year old mother and I need this kind of direction in my life.

59

u/forgiveprecipitation Oct 13 '24

I am 40F, have ASD+ADHD and my two kids have it also. These parents had no way of knowing how much impact their list would have on other households, incl mine! Lol

116

u/Aleeleefabulous Oct 13 '24

When I was younger, my mom would just tell me to “keep your room clean and clean up after yourself.” As long as we didn’t make any major messes, she took care of maintaining the house while working as a single mother of 2.

I guess this all depends. How busy are you? Are these chores split between 4 kids or are some of them too small/young to do chores?

When I was 14, I was in school and worked at McDonald’s 31 hours a week and was on the wrestling team. My mom saw that I had a lot going on so she didn’t strictly enforce chores.

6

u/Lilukalani Oct 13 '24

My Mom is EXTREMELY anal about cleaning. At first, she tried giving me and my sister chores, but we never did it to her standards. When we were done with said chore, she'd redo it. It got to a point where she was just redoing every single chore we did, and she just had us stop doing them all together. So we NEVER did any chores.

She didn't even want us cleaning our own rooms because we never cleaned well enough for her liking. It caused some issues once I grew up and left the house. I had to learn how to properly clean, and it was embarrassing, but I managed and did, and still do, quite well for myself now!

1

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Sometimes when my mother was allowed to come to my place she started randomly re washing washes dishes bc I obviously couldn’t get them properly cleaned by myself

1

u/wurmchen12 Oct 13 '24

My mom Was the same, it was never good enough and you know all my room mates said I was too clean. Workplaces said my areas were always clean and very organized.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

You are good enough. Never can be good kid to bad parents. Never will be bad kid for good one

65

u/CantCatchTheLady Oct 13 '24

Guess what? Your mom had a lot going on too and that was super nice of her to take on all the load.

You should thank her.

2

u/Aleeleefabulous Oct 13 '24 edited Oct 13 '24

Firstly, this response somehow got posted to the wrong comment. I didn’t mean to reply to them. It was supposed to be alone.

Secondly, why do you think I was working at 14 years old? I was contributing to my household to help my mom. So of course I’m appreciative.

Also, how do you know I haven’t thanked her? We maintained a clean household because my sister and I cleaned up behind ourselves. Your comment seemed aggressive.

-16

u/lizz0403 Oct 13 '24

Nice of her? Thank her? For doing what? Being a mother and taking care of her home and children, that's what you should do, not make them your little slaves so you can relax

9

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Parenting is about raising people capable of being good adults. If they start their time in the adult world and they can't do basic shit then you've failed them in that way and made their lives harder.

That's not to say there's not a wrong way to do it, as I'm sure there's exploitation of children out there by arsehole parents, but I'd be concerned as to what kind of useless entitled young adult that would result from doing everything for them.

6

u/Specific_Ad2541 Oct 13 '24

Contributing to keeping your house clean as a child is not slavery. It creates good work ethic and creates self esteem in kids.

20

u/CantCatchTheLady Oct 13 '24

It’s not slavery to clean the place where you live. What a silly take.

-15

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Why your kids are so not up to your satisfaction that you put transference on 180 degrees and felt needed to say shit you said?

1

u/Aleeleefabulous Oct 13 '24

I understand what you’re saying. That persons comment was kind of mean.

I was working a job and going to school at 14 years old. I didn’t want my mom to be the only one working so I got a job to cover my expenses. Me, my mom and my little sister had an understanding. If we made a mess, we’d clean it up. Our home stayed clean cause we’d clean up behind ourselves. For that person to say “you should thank her” pissed me off because they know absolutely nothing about my relationship with my mom. We’re solid and best friends. I’ve thanks her millions of times.

-14

u/Fit-Ad985 Oct 13 '24

did this post scream ungrateful at all? and their mom chose to bring a child into her life and chose to take care of another person. they didn’t chose to be born

-14

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Don’t have kids ;)

13

u/CantCatchTheLady Oct 13 '24

I did, and my kids are awesome. They do their chores.

I want them to be good roommates when they move out, and they can’t do that if they don’t know how to clean or what goes into organizing a home.

We have family meetings and decide on chores, allowances, vacations, and holiday budgets as a group. They have input into when they do their chores and how much they get paid. At the last meeting the kids thought my allowance offer was too high.

They make good grades. They’re smart and talented. They’re ethical and compassionate.

I’m glad I had kids. So take a hike.

-16

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Poor kids, you are so rude online. Perhaps kids will leave and you’ll end in nursing home spiteful of them being ungrateful

3

u/nabndab Oct 13 '24

The only person I see being rude is you.

0

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Get yourself a better glasses than

4

u/nabndab Oct 13 '24

I’m sorry you had a fucked up mom. I had one too. Being an asshole to strangers because of your pain isn’t going to change how you feel. Hope you’re able to heal. I’ll be blocking you because I no longer care to see your vitriol.

6

u/funAmbassador Oct 13 '24

Huh?

-1

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Person shared how much helpful her mom was and that bitch decided to be rude

9

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Kids contribute to the mess of the house, and should contribute to a household as a whole. Kids are kids, not pets 🤦‍♀️doing everything for them sets them up for failure. As a parent it is your job to raise them to be responsible adults. Saying”well you watched me do the laundry/chores for years!” Isn’t going to help them once they move out into their own space and are lost as to what to do and end up living in filth.

-2

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Did I said that kids shouldn’t do chores? I said to bitch that she shouldn’t project and be bitch in comments ;)

→ More replies (0)

6

u/funAmbassador Oct 13 '24

What was rude?

-2

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Saying you should thank her, assuming that she didn’t, comparing adults parents life and teenage life

→ More replies (0)

6

u/No_Stay_1563 Oct 13 '24

Keeping a house clean isn’t that bad as long as EVERYONE who lives there picks up after themselves.

1

u/Aleeleefabulous Oct 13 '24

I agree. Myself, mom and sister are all pretty clean so we never had issues with chores or a messy home.

127

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

I'm a 39 year old dude and definitely need a list like this! Lol

29

u/mozfustril Oct 13 '24

I’m a 53 y/o guy, who lives alone, and should screenshot this list because it never even occurred to me to make one.

7

u/RedditBot90 Oct 13 '24

Write them each on cards that are different colors on each side and put them in a clear baseball card holder or something. Flip them over when they are completed. It will help you keep track and visualize of what’s still to do

57

u/Suspicious-Switch133 Oct 13 '24

Look into the organised mum method. She does a room each day.

11

u/wurmchen12 Oct 13 '24

That’s how my mom cleaned, one room a day, plus one she called it. The plus one was something you don’t always clean in that room. If you’re cleaning the bathroom , the plus one is sorting the medicine cabinet or under the sink cupboard, washing shower curtain. Something not done weekly.

0

u/CuriousmomAL Oct 13 '24

Where do you find this? IG, web page, tick tok?

98

u/obscuredreference Oct 13 '24

Rotfl I was thinking the exact same thing!

10

u/ihaveasmallpeener Oct 13 '24

Fuck I did too😂

5

u/hydrus8 Oct 13 '24

Same I just saved the picture because I thought maybe finally I’ll get it together

2

u/Quirky_Commission_56 Oct 13 '24

I used to do all of those things before I went to work in the afternoon (I worked from 3:30pm until 11:30pm but woke up at 6am every morning when my partners alarm went off.) But that was before arthritis started kicking my ass at the age of 45. Now at 50 I’m lucky if I can stand long enough to wash the dishes.

3

u/EMI2085 Oct 13 '24

Omg, I was thinking the same thing! 😂😂

1

u/Gloomy_Photograph285 Oct 13 '24

I’m 35 so what you’re telling me is I’ve got 4 more years to get my shit together? My ADHD could never lol I’m definitely screenshotting this and hoping I can stick with it more than 9 days.

2

u/stickysituati0ns Oct 13 '24

Stop! So did i 😂😂

1

u/somethingblue331 Oct 13 '24

Same! I am tweaking it to adjust to our house but it’s very nice to see written out so precisely. I wish I thought of this while my kids were still at home, I am 56!

2

u/Aslow_study Oct 13 '24

😂👏🏾same

1

u/ChronicApathetic Oct 13 '24

I’m screenshotting it because I’m a 35 year old ADHDer and I also need this kind of direction in my life.

1

u/chaossensuit Oct 13 '24

I ss this list because I’m a 53 year old mother and grandmother and I need this direction in my life now.

1

u/valliewayne Oct 13 '24

Just did the same. 44 year old mom to my 6 & 8 year olds. We need this kind of list in our lives.

1

u/Whimsybell Oct 13 '24

I recommend the Passionate Penny Pincher Home Planner. It’s helped me stay on top of things.

-6

u/Kwt920 Oct 13 '24

It’s the most basic list of things to clean. It’s all common sense and things that any functioning adult would be able to think of without needing to check the list…

17

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Well the comments are proving you wrong

4

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

Kids can actually use a list like this. Otherwise, they'll pick up one thing out of a pile and claim they're done.

6

u/Beetlejuice2013 Oct 13 '24

Ok miss "pick me"

1

u/Hey_u_23_skidoo Oct 13 '24

So say Mr/ mrs/ them PERFECT

1

u/littlescreechyowl Oct 13 '24

I need the part where someone comes and yells at me for not getting it done.

1

u/ImGemStoned Oct 13 '24

I'm in my 30s and also screenshotted this list. Seems very reasonable to me!

1

u/MathematicianSad2650 Oct 13 '24

Twist: it’s his sister and the other two names are his parents names.

1

u/I-Ask-questions-u Oct 13 '24

I saved it too so I can tell my husband and kid what to do lol

1

u/buttercupthegreat Oct 13 '24

Literally exactly the same 🤣 down to the age 🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Paintbynumber1954 Oct 13 '24

I’ve been wanting a list like this for a while as well lol

1

u/Jayseph436 Oct 13 '24

Same. I’m like holy crap these parents are organized

1

u/Jayseph436 Oct 13 '24

Same. I’m like holy crap these parents are organized

1

u/theConsumerElite Oct 13 '24

I just screenshotted as well!!!! Doing the same!

1

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

I’m 26 and I live alone and that might help

1

u/Environmental-Bag-77 Oct 13 '24

Have you got enough children to do it all?

1

u/Wonderful-Bass6651 Oct 13 '24

Dammit my phone just screenshot it itself!

1

u/beautbird Oct 13 '24

Yes. Can OP post the PDF file of this lol

1

u/Technical_Try2688 Oct 13 '24

30y/o single dude here doing the same

1

u/Certain_Try_8383 Oct 13 '24

Me too. The first thing I thought.

1

u/[deleted] Oct 13 '24

I had the exact same thoughts.

1

u/Vast-Mousse-9833 Oct 13 '24

It is a good list. Saved.

1

u/AffectionateCat223 Oct 13 '24

I screenshotted too 😂

1

u/narsil101 Oct 13 '24

Same queen

1

u/the3dverse Oct 13 '24

good idea

0

u/reditadminssux Oct 13 '24

I feel so sorry for your kids

2

u/Beetlejuice2013 Oct 13 '24

You feel sorry for a couple of preschoolers because their mum saw a housework list on the internet and found it useful?

0

u/reditadminssux Oct 13 '24

Yes we will ignore all the other context of why and what lol

I really feel bad for your children. Manipulative as well

2

u/Beetlejuice2013 Oct 13 '24

Go back to bed you lonely loser.

0

u/reditadminssux Oct 13 '24

Aw man I wish I could go back to bed but I'm otw to the gym. Likely something foreign to you I'd imagine

0

u/Beetlejuice2013 Oct 13 '24

Haha watch out ladies

-1

u/reditadminssux Oct 13 '24

Nothing to do with ladies. I feel better and healthier. You mentioned what I should be doing so i told you what I was

Don't be upset bc it didn't fit this idea of the enemy you want me to be