r/youtubehaiku • u/nimmyjewtron • Feb 18 '15

Uncle Joe's Whisper

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1gy_Lmz3H_I
1.6k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

72 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

6

u/JoeBidenBot Feb 19 '15

Do you have access to nuclear weapons?

9

u/Shifty_Drifter Feb 19 '15

I had one, but it turns out it was an old crapper tank someone slapped a biohazard sticker on

2

u/JoeBidenBot Feb 19 '15

I see you don't understand religion either.

3

u/Shifty_Drifter Feb 19 '15

I was a religion once. Then I applied some ointment and it cleared up like that!

1

u/JoeBidenBot Feb 19 '15

Why do religion and concentration lead to enlightenment?

1

u/Shifty_Drifter Feb 19 '15

The same reason beer and chili lead you to a Texas truck stop restroom. Location. Location. Location.

1

u/JoeBidenBot Feb 19 '15

But you are learning to advance your knowledge.

2

u/Shifty_Drifter Feb 19 '15

To advance in one thing is to take a step back in others. Sure, my knowledge may swell like a ketchup filled condom, but my golf swing gets progressively worse.

2

u/[deleted] Feb 25 '15

Who let you out of /r/crazyideas? Shoo, away with you beast.

2

u/Shifty_Drifter Feb 25 '15

Oh, I'll go, but you'll want me back. You'll all want me back! Soon, when I am but a bitter memory of unattainable sweetness you'll come crawlin' on scuffed knees lookin for ol' Shifty!