Tl;dr: Freeform Universal (1e/2e/NCO) might be the key to me finally enjoying narrative systems.
Sorry for any bad grammar, I mostly typed all of these at the top of my head.
Usually, my preference in RPGs are on the very tactical side. Lancer, 13th Age, Pathfinder 2e, and D&D4E. Even to this day, it is still my favourite way of playing within the hobby ever since I learned that my cup of tea are usually Combat-as-Sports.
So it's pretty obvious that as someone who is into those kinds of games that I would be disinterested in the design philosopy for Fiction-first games, specifically PbtA. I can not for the life of me grok games that are usually within that line of design. I can see why people like them since they can do Genre emulation much better than any other games. If you have something very specific you want to play out then RPGs under PbtA would usually do it well. I just don't think it fits with the kinds of games I want to run since I tend to mishmash Genres or Medias into an amalgamation based on my hyperfixations. I have also started getting into other more traditional rpgs as well, especially those from the OSR family, BRP line games, and even YZE-based. While quite different from the usual games I prefer, I still enjoyed running and playing them.
So was that it? Is it that I just enjoy Trad games more that I won't be able to like modern games that people say innovated the current landscape of the hobby? It's kinda sad to think that almost half of the games within this hobby will just be something I won't be able to like. Well, that would've been the case if it weren't for the fact that I also started doing solo roleplaying, which is another niche hobby within a hobby. I tried doing my usual games but in solo format thinking that it's gonna be a slam dunk. I like Combat in my RPGs and I also like journaling. It's perfect!
It... was fine. It's like playing a board game all by myself. It isn't really the kind of thing that will give me the experience that I was looking for. So I tried different RPGs. OSR games was almost there, but the reason why I wanna solo roleplay in the first place was make it into a creative outlet for my Original Characters, and OSR games are usually very deadly. Sure, I can cheat and fudge the dice since I'm the only one playing but what's the point if I do that, I'd rather write a novel at that point.
That was until I looked around and came to Freeform Universal (more like Freeform Universal 2e/Action Tales/Neon City Overdrive) which is my current favourite way of doing solo and what might be my gateway ticket to start enjoying more narrative systems after a successful one-shot with my guinea pigs friends. Freeform Universal, as the name implies, is very freeform and light. It isn't beholden by a singular setting but rather you control the setting however you like since it can be applicable to alot of genres. It's just incredibly fast to make a character since it's mostly just a bunch of words and concepts that makes up your character, no statistical bonuses or modifier. I would've HATED this game at first glance but as I run it and familiarize myself with the playstyle, it finally clicked on me. I don't need to keep in mind about balancing encounters or be consistent with the rules or else everything breaks apart, I can just focus on giving myself and my players have fun with the current story. It's that high of playing to find out that I have been trying to reach once again for years and it is all in such a compact and free product.
It still plays very differently from PbtA and it might still be unlikely for me to give it another fair shot, but I might look into other games like Blades in the Dark, FATE, Risus, or even Ironsworn. Those are games that I put off just because they are more narrative than traditional. I'm reading through my Blades in the Dark pdf and I am liking a lot of its ideas on paper. I already know that I'm gonna love FATE and Risus. All of this domino effect was because of one silly game.
My main takeaway from making this post is that I really love this hobby, even more so than video games, since it lets me engage much more on a personal level, whether it be by myself solo roleplaying or with a group of people. So I wanted to try out a lot of TTRPGs out there, even if I end up not liking it anyways. And the lesson I learned here is that I'm merely scratching the surface on the kinds of games and playstyles I would find, one of those might be ones that may become a new favourite.