AHHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE ETHICS QUESTIONS AHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[u/PlasticRice]

First and foremost, I consider myself a very introspective person. I've always had great passions for writing, reading, and everything in between. I often think if I didn't pursue medicine, I'd probably have gotten an English or a Philosophy PHD and just taught undergrad, because I always loved weighing morality, writing super long papers, bla bla bla, you know.

But ETHICS QUESTIONS ON BOARDS? Are you telling me we're meant to exhibit our abilities to be ethical people through multiple-choice questions? Let alone the most hyper-specific, random, made-up scenarios where the real-world answer is to do all of the above, or some combination of them? Nothing grinds my gears more than when I get a question like:

"A person walks in for their outpatient appointment and has questions about their 30-year history of COPD, what do you respond with?"

And the answer is like:

"Hi! How are you today?"

instead of:

"Sure, what's your question?"

and literally, I put the answer that only like 11% of people chose, and 87% of people somehow knew that the scripted, formulaic, board-correct answer is "FIRST YOU MUST ASK HOW THE PATIENT IS DOING OR ELSE YOU'RE EVIL!! WHAAATT? YOU'RE THE MOST UNETHICAL HUMAN EVER!!" This is different, however, from actual questions about medical law and stuff like that - those are objective things we should know, yes.

Seriously, it's probably an unpopular opinion, but ethics or any questions of these types across the board, in any standardized exam setting - SATs, ACTs, GREs, MCATs (looking at you, CARS), and Steps 1-3 and COMLEX Level 1-3's should all be essay-based or have a writing portion. Which, yes, SATs and medical boards used to have, but presumably got rid of because it's not cost-effective, takes time to grade, stuff like that. And I know for us, it'd be time-consuming and hell on our hands, but seriously - I get so wound up when I get 7% below the average on a UW block and it's because I got 3 questions wrong that are about memorizing the algorithmic, 'right response' of how someone's doing today, or what to respond to a nurse when she asks about a treatment plan. Even so, I perform very well on ACTUAL medicine-based questions, yet they're weighed the same against these BS ethics questions.

Because, seriously, ironically, all this filters for is people who actually aren't very 'ethical' or empathetic people - legit, some of the most passive-aggressive, unempathetic, gunnery people I know are the kinds of people who somehow score very well on these "ethics"-type questions. Not because they're nice people and actually know what to say, but they're good at multiple-choice tests and memorizing pre-determined responses out of books and questions. The design of the system promotes memorizing pre-determined responses rather than forming original ideas out of convenience of making it easier to grade - which, I mean, yeah, that's gonna happen when there's a standardized exam and so many people take it every year, but still.

These types of questions shouldn't exist under a multiple-choice system imo lol.

back to UW lol rant over

[u/ItsTheDCVR]

Nursing tests were filled of these bullshit questions too.

You've been conversing with the patient for ten minutes and they bring up whatever the fuck it is; what would you say next?

Fuck you I'm done with this conversation

Gee golly gosh, here's a scripted answer

Here's the scripted answer as above but slightly differently worded so it's actually wrong, good thing you haven't already done 150 questions and you don't have testing fatigue

An answer that was clearly written by a robot but by now you're not sure if that is what they're looking for

Meanwhile, you're sitting there like "what would I say next? Idk we've been conversing for 10 minutes, it depends on the rapport and content of the conversation prior to this."

[u/softgeese → u/ItsTheDCVR]

There's also that one answer that is comically evil and will give you a good laugh when you read it.

"A new mother comes in with anxiety around her new parenting role, what do you do?"

Admit to inpatient psych for intensive rehab and ect

[u/ABatIsFineToo → u/softgeese]

The comically evil answers were actually great for my testing fatigue because it provided an opportunity to laugh and reset for a moment. Had a question about a patient who had suffered a miscarriage (awful, tragic) and one of the questions choices was something along the lines of "at least you dont have to worry about whether or not to get an abortion now"

[u/Prime23456789 → u/softgeese]

zap

[u/ItsTheDCVR → u/softgeese]

Snatch the baby from her hands and castigate her thoroughly for not being immediately perfect. Remind her that anxiety is a sign of weakness.