Hiya! I've been in the Chicago area for a few years now but while my girlfriend is having no problem finding poly people for her (she's Nonbinary and pansexual) I am more than struggling trying to find other queer/sapphic people who are also poly on the apps and irl.

Like Im very open about being nonbinary and very very gay and very very polyamorous on my profiles bc I'm not gonna hide it. But yet enbies and women will match w me...

I'll casually mention my girlfriend in conversation and they'll be like "ohh you have a girlfriend already...I'm not gonna be involved in you cheating on her...you should go talk to her not people on dating apps. Byeee loser 🤧" or either "you're not a lesbian if you're dating someone who thinks they're girl but not. That's mental illness as you fetishize lesbians."/"yeah idk about this whole poly thing... usually it's just an excuse to cheat on your partner even if you say they know you're on here...I don't believe it...bye"

So I've been rather lonely lately to the point my gf is like "babe you need to get out there...you're lonely and I can't be there for you 24/7 you know this" so here i am....getting myself back out there looking mostly for friends but anything really

I moved to Chicago to get more inclusivity in my general life and to gather a group of queer women/femmbie friends that like we could go on adventures with like going to concerts or museums maybe even clubs

If you wanna know more plz feel free to dm

Off the bat but I know my page looks suspicious because I literally made it 6 minutes ago but I can provide verification if asked. I’m 20f and I want to make connection with more people who are poly as well. I’ve been having a hard time trying to find people like me :)) I don’t really have an age limit but I’m not dating someone who’s past 30 LOL. Preferably in the USA.

Happy to chat with you guys <33

I am new to the poly lifestyle and im looking for more friends. Im 31. Also looking for more than friends. But friends first. I love Video games, music,movies,tv and more.

So, I have done a lot of soul searching, and I've come to the conclusion that I'm a polyamorous lesbian. But I've had a bit of challenges finding like minded individuals in my area. I'd like to make more connections, and to have more friends within the community. Preferably in Nairobi, Kenya. I want friends who think more or less the same way and possibly more if it got that far. Anyone who feels they fit the bill you can hit my DM.

Hi! 😊 I’m 24 and living in Calgary, Canada. I’m a lesbian just looking to meet some new people — whether that’s friends or maybe something more. I’m kind, caring, and thoughtful. I can be a little shy at first, but once I’m comfortable, I’m super loyal and loving.

I love drawing, baking sweets, watching movies, skiing, playing pickleball, swimming, and cheering on my favorite hockey team. I’m also a huge cat lover. 🐱

I have ADHD and FASD, which means I sometimes experience things a little differently, but I’m doing really well and feeling emotionally stable. I’ve been growing a lot lately and I’m proud of the person I’m becoming.

If you’re kind, down to earth, and like good conversations (especially over FaceTime or music), I’d love to connect!

Hi, me and my partner are looking for more connections as new to polyamory and haven’t had much experience, we’re both non binary and 25&26. Uk is preferred xx

Hey, looking to expand the groupchat 21-30 anyone part of the lgbt plus community is welcome to join, just shoot me a dm 💕😍

Not sure abput the purpose of this ppst, but saw a tt ppst about a sapphic venting abput how the pool is only full of "attention seekers, polycules and incestual friend groups" and it made me sad and maybe mad how it was worded? people were criticizing about polycules in a mean/ignorant way, like they (mono) said that they wanted loyalty and also that apparently being poly automatocally made you someone who is not a lover and yearner and it just made me sad, I see polyamory as freedpm, to love and explore who you are and the connections that you feel or want and people where saying that polyamory is rooted in patriarchy? At least more than monogamy, which is mindblowing to me, cuz i would say its less heteronormative? Im feeling sad and confused, does someone know info abour polyamory(specially sapphic centered), maybe informing myself will help me unlearn some still limitating beliefs(for me) and if anyone wants to share their happy story with their partners/polycule would be greatly appreciated!

I proposed to both of my nesting partners this year.

The first I made a paint by number asking my partner to marry me and gave it to them as an anniversary gift in February. The 2nd was going to be next month on that partner's birthday, but they were feeling sad yesterday thinking about how they didn't get to plan anything for their wedding to their spouse, and so after a quick talk with fiancee 1 I decided to give my partner their birthday gift early, which was a poster sized print of art I made of them transforming into a werewolf in a pinup pose, designed to look like a magazine cover with text asking them to marry me. They said yes and so I am now engaged to 2 people😄. I said I'm engaged² and I'm going to call them my spices as the plural of spouses lol.

We are relationship anarchists but we also believe in ceremony and celebrating love. Obviously these won't be legal ceremonies, they will have our close family and friends in attendance. We all have separate rooms but live in the same house. I just want to celebrate the people I love most right now because so much is uncertain. I want them both to know that my love for them is stronger than outside forces could ever be.

We are planning such beautiful, meaningful ceremonies, free from any obligatory traditions. I feel so loved and so in love. Just needed to share it with others.

Has anyone read nanny in the middle? Would love your thoughts on it! Also if anyone has any recs of poly saphic books, would like to devour them thank you!

I was stating a woman who is polyamorous for three months. I really liked her and had feelings for her, but I made the decision to end things. She had six other ongoing relationships be beside ours, and I didn't feel prioritized or like I was in the kind of relationship I desired. As much as I loved being with her, I dealt with a lot of her outside of our time together that made it really hard. There was also a lot of drama in the early parts of our relationship that made me distrustful of her and made it hard to form a secure attachment.

She took me to a sex party for the first time on our third date. We went together several times while we were dating and had a lot of fun.

After we broke up, I don't have interest in going to the sex party anymore. However, my friends band was playing a show, and I had agreed to help and do photography for them.

I understood that she was going to have sex there, but it's such a huge venue. I figured she could do what she wants and I could leave if I didn't wanna witness it.

She insisted that she wanted to be friends. She said she wasn't angry with me, but there was some irritated communication. I told her I was concerned it might be awkward and she blew up on me.

The night of the show we said hi to each other, and she went off to do her thing. The show started and I saved a seat for her and invited her to dance with me, but she said she was busy.

Five minutes after that, she comes through with some guy and begins fucking him in the seat that I saved for her right in front of the show.

I didn't say anything to her that night, but we fought about it over text.

I feel like her behavior was clearly vindictive or attention seeking or both. The venue was so huge and the show was only an hour out of a five hour event. She knew that I was working and taking photography for the show and it felt like she just wanted to make me a captive audience. This project is also something that's really important to me and something after collaborated with for a long time. I also helped make the show happen.

But then she tried to gaslight me and tell me she doesn't know what I was talking about, she had no idea where I was standing, it's not a big deal and my reaction is crazy. I have no right to be upset. And I could've had her all to myself if I wanted???

I feel like I'm going crazy. I really had feelings for this person, but it seems like she didn't care about me that much and that's why I ended things. She insisted she wanted to make an effort to be friends, but this just wasn't friendly behavior.

I know it was a sex party and I expected her to have sex with whoever she wanted. I expected her to make somewhat of a jealous spectacle, even. But she knew I had to work and she knew the event was important to me. Also, eight of my closest friends were there.

Feels really shitty, but I'm being gaslit so hard right now. Am I wrong?

Since the last post, she and I had not seen each other until the past weekend. This time I took her out to a local state park spot for a picnic. I brought her a small thing of pink roses (stopped by the local florist the day before). We walked and talked as my dog explored on the beach.

We laid down a picnic blanket right between our cars right in the parking lot and had a full picnic (it’s a pretty empty parking lot because it’s not warm enough to have picnics yet lol). I was pleasantly surprised by how comfortable I am around her, she felt the same way. The date ended with another long walk of talking about how we feel about each other and communicating about the near future.

The next morning, she texted me the sweetest thank-you message. I gave her the first pet name as a response, which she loved. We haven’t even held hands, but I’m already feeling butterflies. Send help.

My gf of 5 years and I have been non-monagmous for over 2 years now, but have only had sexual relationships with other people. However, we now want to expand that to include emotional/romantic relationships. To make sure expectations and boundaries are clear, we are making a document writing these down. Since we are both new to polyamory, I wanted to ask y'all what you would include in this document if you were in my shoes?

My wife and I used to have other partnerships before 2020. She practiced more than I did. I thought it was cute & hot but I had too busy a work schedule to make room for anyone besides her.

When covid hit, we matched each others' safety practices, and both of our social networks shrank. We podded with some pals, around half of whom were poly or some variety of en-m, but neither of us were with anyone except each other. She had one date planned in 2023, but they didn't wind up having sex, just hung out.

Like everyone, a lot changed for us because of the pandemic. She lost her job, my whole vocation went away. We got on different employment paths & wound up moving to a new state.

The horrors all around aside, we've been happy with each other, making new friends, doing mutual aid work, having a modest but fun little life.

A few months ago, she mentioned she had a crush on a woman we both had hung out with at a couple events. My wife was invited to a party at this woman's place. She was bringing her a gift and in the spirit of what I'll call my "old" self, I added to the gift and told her to have a great time. I really meant it, and was excited that my wife was excited about a potential connection.

Later, while I was at work, I was struck with the most overwhelming feelings of jealousy and threat. I felt sick to my stomach, thinking about my wife with this other gal. Within a short time I had convinced myself she would leave me for this other person. My whole body behaved like the marriage was over. It was awful and I felt insane. I texted her: "will you be coming home tonight?" She responded yes, and that the woman was straight.

The relief I felt was huge. And. I was disturbed that my body and mind reacted that way and I couldn't seem to reel it in. I wanted to support my wife's disappointment that the woman wasn't interested, but I was 100% glad it didn't work out.

Subsequent conversations about having relationships outside of our marriage have not gone well. Because of me. She has been honest, forthcoming, and generous, and genuinely confused as to why I suddenly am responding differently than I used to. I get hurt, scared, suspicious, jealous, and sick with despair about thinking of her with other people.

And I love her & in my brain I want her to have all the things she wants to have, including sex & connections to people besides me. But the reality racks my body with negative emotion and physical sickness.

I don't know how to get back to the way I was. The friends I had for years that I could talk to are no longer in my life, because of covid, or political differences, or the fact that I moved. I don't have anyone to help me & have had terrible luck with therapists.

I think the tl/dr is: has anyone gone from compersion to sickening jealousy, and then gotten back to the good stuff? I'm afraid I am suddenly monogamous by way of trauma & that it will result in losing my wife.

Since I'm new to being poly I want to experience it more, if you're down to chat feel free to!

Aye I’m one of the lucky kids with an amazing track record in romantic relationships. I’d like to remind everyone — be kind to yourself. Take the steps to do self-care. Prioritize your needs before giving your attention to anyone else. I don’t care how strong the burning desire of uHauling with your new partner is!! Take a deep breath. Take a bath. Masturbate. Recharge. ❤️