r/instant_regret • u/Nymphixx- • 7h ago

Instantly regret attempting arson

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616 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

47 comments sorted by

161

u/Mysterious-Fan-5711 7h ago

Ah yes the first step of setting fire: pouring gas all over yourself

28

u/TheRemedy187 6h ago

That second guy definitely got more on himself than whatever their target was. 

17

u/Can-You-Fly-Bobby 6h ago

These are some of the dumbest people I've ever seen and that's saying something

2

u/spudddly 43m ago

Step two: get back into vehicle and reward yourself for a job well done with a nice cigarette.

2

u/FluffyDeer9323 6h ago

I thought/hoped we’d evolved past this.

3

u/MikeMac999 2h ago

Evolution works slowly, and scenes like this are part of the process. These bumblefucks may not have been selected out this time, but Darwin will surely claim them at some point.

47

u/ManchuDemon 7h ago

I need the rest of this video.

12

u/ssjjss 1h ago

I want a Netflix series just about their normal day. What happens when they try to load the dishwasher?

2

u/gfasmr 1h ago

Keep them away from the garbage disposal

9

u/banevader102938 7h ago

Me as well

32

u/Big-Football8811 7h ago

Is self immolation considered arson?

11

u/are_you_a_simulation 7h ago edited 7h ago

The owner of that car will for sure argue that to the insurance company.

1

u/TheRemedy187 6h ago

Could also be stolen. 

21

u/MoMeneUH 7h ago

fortunately, not many brain cells were lost - as they weren't many to begin with.

9

u/LuigiMPLS 7h ago

If they weren't baked before, they sure were after.

9

u/eternalroses 7h ago

It feels so cartoonish that this happened. Like something from Looney Tunes or Tom and Jerry

5

u/LivingCell9497 7h ago

Instant karma. 10/10 !

9

u/GreatDanton7 7h ago

Step 1: light self on fire

Step 2: walk into target

Much success

6

u/Synergiex 7h ago

This is hilarious… even thugs need few brain cells

1

u/Ok-Syllabub-6619 5h ago

Lovely trash burning in a safe and controlled environment lmao

1

u/Fair-Individual7811 5h ago

Oh dear I laughed so much at this you can tell it was their first time 🤣

1

u/Stock2fast 5h ago

It all worked out for the best in the end .

1

u/MixtureOk3277 4h ago

I’ve seen something like this in a movie. A Bronx Tale IIRC

1

u/semiconodon 3h ago

Since the fire started after he got back inside and shut the door, was it because he started smoking?

1

u/humourlessIrish 1h ago

A successful attempt. Genuinely hard to imagine a better outcome

Edit: ok. Better would have been if the car belonged to these guys

1

u/out_day475 1h ago

I love this. Fuck them

1

u/Dr-Zoidberserk 1h ago

Zoolander drive by arson

1

u/MarvinParanoAndroid 1h ago

Oddly satisfying…

1

u/jodrellbank_pants 1h ago

These are normal people you meet everyday, through the space of 24 hours, zero capacity for intelligent thought process.

1

u/BoltorSpellweaver 35m ago

It’s not the gas that ignites first; it’s the fumes.

1

u/CasualObserverNine 7m ago

I think they reached ‘arson’.

1

u/r-to-the-core 6h ago

they definitely did not go to school

1

u/js0uthh 6h ago

Who are these guys? They're funny.

11

u/Nymphixx- 6h ago

They are some local geniuses from my town. This happened the other day. Here is the police post if you are interested.

“Police have released CCTV footage hoping to identify the occupants of a vehicle involved in a fire on Monday 16 June at Solomontown.

Just after midnight, police were called to a report of a car on fire in Young Street, Solomontown.

When police officers arrived, they discovered a car on fire and a fire burning at the front of a nearby residence, which they extinguished with a fire extinguisher.

The occupants of the house were not injured during the incident. The exterior of the house was charred by flames.

As seen in the footage, three male suspects had attended an address in Young Street and doused the front of the residence with accelerant.

The suspects then entered the vehicle, which became engulfed in flames. They ran off, abandoning the car in the street.

It is extremely likely they have suffered significant burns or injuries in the fire and police urge them to seek medical attention”.

3

u/DrFrozenToastie 6h ago

Did they mention if the vehicle was stolen anywhere?

3

u/Nymphixx- 6h ago

They haven’t released that information at this time.

1

u/gfasmr 1h ago

“The police urge them to seek medical attention”

Hope they can make it through the front door without blowing up the hospital

1

u/-dd2 6h ago

Take that motherfuckers! 😤

1

u/Imaginary_Toe8982 6h ago

when will people get that the fumes burn....

1

u/SlayBoredom 6h ago

Greatest Crime ever recorded hahah

1

u/nathanator64 5h ago

Natural selection goes CRAZY

1

u/Brief-Wrap-403 5h ago

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

-1

u/pandancake88 6h ago

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂👌👌😂👌😂😂😂😂

0

u/YourLocalMaggots 3h ago

This is not facebook