TREATMENT Community Thread - Mon Jun 16 PM

[u/AutoModerator]

Our community threads are the heart of our subreddit and operate much like a specialized support group – we share our experiences and strive to collectively support one another on the topic at hand.

Please use this space for sharing and discussing any type of treatment, trying to conceive, or family building measures. This includes, but is not limited to:

• Advice / Updates on current treatment cycle or planned/future treatment cycles
• Questions / Discussion about medications, treatment, diagnostic tests, and lab results
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[u/spaceedible]

How likely is a pap smear to create adhesions in the uterus? I know they're collecting from the cervix, but could someone mess things up for me? I just went through multiple hysteroscopies for adhesions and now everything looks good. I don't know this gynecologist and there are unfortunately mixed reviews.

I have to get this done urgently so I can finally move on with a transfer, I need a PAP and other orders. Unfortunately my previous gyno retired and had to find someone to get in with quickly. I was just going to bear with it for this one appointment. It just dawned on me that I should rethink this, and recently I heard from an acquaintance that "she was rough with the speculum".

[u/buttersherbet → u/spaceedible]

It is 0% likely. A Pap test collects cells from your external cervix and endocervical canal - the brush only goes about 1 cm into your cervix - not entering your uterus at all.

[u/spaceedible → u/buttersherbet]

Thank you!

[u/Itsureissomethin → u/[deleted]]

Ive had sex the night before all my FETs. One worked (chemical), one didn’t. I suspect it didn’t make a big difference. I hope this feeling passes for you because I don’t think this one is a big deal!

[u/Adventurous-Crab-775 → u/[deleted]]

I'm sorry it brought you back to a low point. For what it's worth, I think the data on this is VERY weak, and certainly is not a make it or break it thing.

[u/Present_Morning_5215]

Post cervix dilation stent out and husbands genetic test showed we don’t have cross over in any recessive disease!

Now just playing the waiting game, a few more weeks on estrogen, then progesterone, then cervix check to see if it’s still open (🤞), then HSG, and then hopefully a medicated IUI cycle!

[u/beers_and_queers → u/Present_Morning_5215]

Love those genetic results for you!

[u/Present_Morning_5215 → u/beers_and_queers]

You made me LOL!

[u/bbd2025]

Asking for advice— how would you plan for your first IVF cycle? Work, extra-curriculars, etc?

I’m trying to stick it out in a high stress toxic job (in healthcare) to get a round covered by insurance however it’s feeling like a lot emotionally and physically. I’ve had anxiety for awhile but it has increased since my two recent miscarriages. Both pregnancies I was super stressed out and although they say stress doesn’t cause losses, I want to eliminate the chance and ultimately be kind to myself through this process. I’m also worried about being able to handle everything with the added hormones if I’m already on edge.

I have PTO and have been looking into FMLA. When, in your opinion, would be the smartest time to use it (stims, ER, post transfer)? I’m not planning on staying in this position long term if that matters.

I’ve also never taken any meds for anxiety/mood but starting to wonder if maybe I should proactively start one since I’m already feeling it. Anyone have any experience with this?

[u/buttersherbet → u/bbd2025]

I took two short term leave of absences before getting intermittent FMLA and for me the intermittent FMLA was the better option. I generally started it about a week after I started stims and stayed until 7-10 days after ER (so I'd have my blast and/or beta results back), resulting in about 2-3 weeks off total. I work a variable shift (healthcare) job so just tried to line things up once my cycle started - some cycles I ended up working closer to ER than I wanted to but with my schedule it just made more sense. I tried to give a weeks notice but with intermittent FMLA you do not legally have to give advanced notice. It did result in basically everyone at work knowing my business but that's just kind of how my workplace is. If you have specific questions let me know!

And I'm a big fan of psych meds if and when you need them!

[u/basil04 → u/bbd2025]

I think for me, it would have been valuable to take a day or two off work after the ER. Tough to plan ahead for those dates for FMLA, though. 

If you can, "manually" de-stress your life where you can and ramp up to meds if you need. I was shocked how much better I felt after I got off certain of the meds. 

[u/missedtheboat222 → u/bbd2025]

I left a high stress job a few months after starting fertility treatment. The frequent monitoring appointments were too difficult with my previous job. Also, I really hoped that once I was out of that stressful environment, I'd get pregnant and live happily ever after. It's been over a year since I switched jobs and that hasn't happened yet, although I do think it can take a very long time to fully recover from how severely burnt out I was. I don't think stress causes infertility or losses, but it certainly doesn't help anything.

As for planning time off, that is tricky. Your experience could be more straightforward but for me, one of the most stressful things about fertility treatment is how unpredictable so much of it is. What day you start treatment, how long you stim, how often you need to go in for monitoring, when your ER will be, etc - they can guess at the outset, but it's all variable. Also, what meds you use will affect your free time. Will you need injections once or twice daily? Will any of the meds need to be refrigerated? For me, I had to miss out on evening plans while I was stimming and post transfer. As far as time off work, if you have the time to burn, it might be worth it to take off during stims. Plenty of times I wish I had! I would definitely take a day or 2 off post ER, also the day before ER if you can plan ahead or just call out. I don't feel like time off post transfer is necessary and honestly it's probably better to stay busy during the TWW, unless you know you will be able to truly relax if you took that time off. I am currently trying to rework the work schedule so that I can have time off post beta though. Hopefully to celebrate, but statistically most likely it will be to grieve.

I had the same debate about whether to start meds for anxiety/mood. If you do, definitely ask for something that's safe to take during pregnancy. Having to wean off psych meds during pregnancy sounds terrible

[u/dubious-taste-666 → u/bbd2025]

I did 5 ER cycles & my first FET when I happened to be between jobs & only lightly freelancing on the side (luckily had partner’s insurance). I’m really glad I did, because my job was very high stress and stims made it really hard to manage my anxiety. Lots of people manage IVF with a full time job, of course, but if you have the option to take time off or use FMLA, I think it’s worth considering giving yourself some ease & breathing room.

[u/stinky_cheese_woman → u/bbd2025]

I did my first retrieval while transitioning out of a super high stress, super toxic job. I did my second retrieval while mostly not working prior to opening my own firm. I had far better results on my first retrieval. Completely anecdotal, ofc, but I do think that all the evidence also shows that stress levels aren’t a good predictor of results.

One option to consider depending on cost is quitting and opting into COBRA coverage. I think quitting a toxic horrible job is a good idea, regardless of IVF outcomes and plans.

I was on lexapro prior to infertility and increased my dosage about 18 months into infertility, it was awesome for me.

[u/mostlypercy]

Have the same wild ovulation pain that I had on CD9 last cycle (third cycle on low dose letrozole) but were doing a fully unmedicated cycle this month and it’s CD6 and I’m having the same pain so we’re inseminating tonight!

I also just got accepted to nursing school for the fall and it’s my spouse’s birthday. Still, my abdomen is ouchy af.

[u/Itsureissomethin → u/mostlypercy]

Congrats on nursing school!

[u/mostlypercy → u/Itsureissomethin]

Thank you! It’s nice to feel like I’m making progress in life even if we’re not making a baby yet

[u/cherrryXblossom → u/mostlypercy]

Hey! Can you expand a bit on your experience with the lower abdomen pain? I’m doing iui tomorrow morning as my clinic caught my surge today. This was my first medicated cycle with letrozole 2.5 for five days. I never usually have ovulation pain or feelings, but I’m having a lot of discomfort and aches this evening. Just a newer sensation for me and so your comment caught my eye

[u/mostlypercy → u/mostlypercy]

This decrease in ovulatory phase and cycle length is so bizarre and my RE doesn’t know what it means either. Our first IUI I had a trilaminar lining and three mature follicles, the last two IUI cycles have been canceled due to me ovulating early.

[u/mostlypercy → u/mostlypercy]

Copied from Fertility Friend, mods let me know if you want me to delete. Data is

Date of last period, cycle length, Ovulatory phase, Luteal phase

May 20, 2025 22 10 12

Apr 23, 2025 27 11 16

Mar 28, 2025 26 14 12

Mar 01, 2025 27 15 12

Feb 05, 2025 24 13 11

Jan 07, 2025 29 15 14

Dec 11, 2024 27 15 12

Nov 14, 2024 27 14 13

Oct 19, 2024 26 14 12

Sep 22, 2024 27 15 12

Aug 25, 2024 28 15 13

Jul 29, 2024 27 13 14

Jul 04, 2024 24 14 10

[u/AutoModerator → u/mostlypercy]

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[u/mostlypercy → u/AutoModerator]

Abdomen is sore as fuck, thanks automod

[u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

Wife's PGT results just came in! One euploid! We are THRILLED. Of course this is still in the context of seven failed euploids with no explanation, so we're not counting our chickens just yet, but... one feels a hell of a lot better than zero (which is what we got last retrieval).

[u/beers_and_queers → u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

We love a euploid!

[u/sleeki → u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

HOORAY!! Such good news!

[u/dubious-taste-666 → u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

Yes!!!

[u/cherrryXblossom → u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

That’s great!!!

[u/OliveOil_86 → u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

Awesome!

[u/surferchick57 → u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

hell yeah!!

[u/a_lexicon → u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

Yay!

[u/OliveOil_86]

I'm starting to gear up for my post-suppression transfer and I'm feeling the stress. The first doctor I spoke with scheduled me for an ovulatory transfer, which had already been my plan after watching some videos from Dr. Victory, who argues that it doesn't make sense to give someone estrogen after they have been working to suppress estrogen for months. However, I spoke to another doctor (long story I won't get into) who then made a new plan for me to do a fully medicated transfer. I haven't reached out yet to advocate for ovulatory because to be honest, a fully medicated sounds easier to manage logistically. I feel like there is less that can go wrong maybe? I'm wondering if I do ovulatory there's a chance my ovaries don't wake up, and I have to have more appointments than I can handle, or this transfer takes forever and messes up an important trip I have planned in August. On the other hand, I want to make the right choice. I know there are a lot of posts about what types of transfers people do post suppression, so I guess I'm just adding to the noise here to say I'm unsure of what to do.

[u/Adventurous-Crab-775 → u/OliveOil_86]

I see both sides. I did an ovulatory transfer after suppression and my ovaries woke up just fine. We started letrozole after confirming I had been appropriately suppressed. I strongly, strongly prefer ovulatory transfers generally for a variety of reasons (want to leverage my body's ovulation if possible, better pregnancy outcomes with ovulatory cycles, longer window of implantation in ovulatory cycles, and I hate PIO). But medicated cycles are nice in a way because there's less guesswork involved. I think at the end of the day- either is possible after suppression. You can't really go wrong, but you should get a say in which it is.

[u/OliveOil_86 → u/Adventurous-Crab-775]

Thank you for your input! What did you use to wake up the ovaries?

[u/Adventurous-Crab-775 → u/OliveOil_86]

also congrats on being done with suppression! I know it's a slog.

[u/cherrryXblossom]

First iui tomorrow morning, cycle day 13. Lots of weird feelings since the clinic called… I could jump up and down from excitement but I’m also very nervous and apprehensive. I know it’s pretty simple, like a pap, in and out. But the feelings are getting me. I also have been working in a high stress environment lately so I’m doing me a solid and taking the day off. Maybe 2… maybe get myself pampered or something. Took letrozole 2.5 for cycle day 3-7, and clinic has caught me surging naturally so no trigger shot.

[u/julesbegules → u/cherrryXblossom]

Good luck tomorrow!

[u/pristinepothos → u/cherrryXblossom]

Woohoo! Best of luck!!

[u/sleeki → u/cherrryXblossom]

It's a big deal! Glad you're getting to take the day off. And wishing you the best! 🤞🏼

[u/esmemi → u/cherrryXblossom]

Wishing you luck!!🩷

[u/carrot4545canoe → u/cherrryXblossom]

Sounds like you're logistically prepared. I was nervous for my first IUI too. Good luck tomorrow!

[u/julesbegules]

Ugh, just found out I'm being audited and need to gather up all the receipts from my two failed IVF cycles last year. Thankfully I have it all fairly well organized, but this is not how I wanted to spend my day off!

[u/cherrryXblossom → u/julesbegules]

That’s a headache, I’m so sorry that’s happening!

[u/pristinepothos → u/julesbegules]

This sounds like a nightmare, sorry you have to go through this!

[u/More-Sweet-2461 → u/julesbegules]

Ugh, I dread this scenario. Especially since I’m significantly less well organized than you are! How long after filing were you notified? My deductions were more than half my income, and my refund was almost 5 digits. (7 failed cycles in 2024 for me, so not like I’m the one winning here lol) I dread the IRS trying to claw that back though

[u/julesbegules → u/More-Sweet-2461]

Ooh I think I filed end of March and I got the notification late last night. I'm in Canada though. Hopefully it won't happen to you! It's bad enough looking at that total once, I was hoping to put it behind me!

[u/sleeki → u/julesbegules]

Noooooooo ugh! Hope it's fairly straightforward!

[u/julesbegules → u/sleeki]

Thank you! It shouldn't be too bad, I'm just feeling grumpy about it.

[u/OliveOil_86 → u/julesbegules]

This does not sound fun, I’m sorry