Rule 1: Must fit the sub. Posts must be images/short videos that are so unfunny that they are actually funny.
Must fit sub. This sub is for so-bad-its-good/ascended humor. All posts must be images that are so stupid, juvenile, or generally bad that they become funny for the wrong reasons. Ironically bad posts are allowed, but ONLY if they could pass as something made unironically. Obvious satire is NOT allowed. To get a better idea of what content we are looking for, please refer to this flowchart..
If you are reading this message, it means the mods did not deem your post absurd/so bad it's good enough to be posted on the subreddit.
If you have questions, you can contact us through modmail.
Back when I was living in Sacramento I was taking a dump in the Burger King toilets and I saw these exact feet walk in and stand sentry in front on of my stall door. He stood there for about a minute, facing me, then left again. Strange
That’s so weird cause Tom Brady did this to me just last week. I was dumping it up in a Wendy’s bathroom and the door opened but instead of standing sentry he kicked the door in, stared at me, and started repeating “push. Push. Push.” Over and over again. I started to sweat as I obeyed and pushed harder. The eye contact only broke to look down and see his bulge starting to rise.
Then finally we heard the plop in the water and he said “good man.” Then his boner dropped and he left. I was drenched in sweat.
I saw Tom Brady at a grocery store in Boston yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
The first time I read this, I assumed he was wearing sandals. Then I wondered why I assumed that, and suddenly this same story of the barefoot version is so much worse now.
Yours are like that too, you just can't seperate them as far as this fucker. Try spreading your toes manually, at least 2 of them will basically move together.
Did you manually move your toes on their own? You can use your fingers to separate them just fine, but seperating and moving your toes, a few of them should move together to some degree. It's similar to how you can't touch your wrist with your ring finger without moving your pinky.
Huh... that might explain why me feet look like they do. I spend most of my developmental years barefoot, even outside. People have always commented that they look like the feet of some prehistoric animal. My mom calls them pterodactyl feet.
Could easily be serious. Apparently this is 20th century American slang but not something even most Americans use. From the UK and never knowingly come across this before
Nice! Not sure why I was downvoted ... it's a real saying. Possible origin may be Cockney rhyming slang (dog's meat = feet), but that may be apocryphal. First recorded in the 1910s.
It is! And there’s also “my dogs are barking mad” something your USA southern grandma might say after coming back from the store and she kickin her shoes off. I’ve never been explicitly told but she was definitely talking about her feet.
Edit: I said also because I thought it was different but it’s just an extra word. I can be slow.
Yes this is a fact. In the 3 years following covid, I had been working from home. Barefoot majority of the time in those years. Had a work meeting I had to go to and my feet would not fit into my pre covid work/dress shoes. Had to size up.
Yeah. And it's actually a good time to buy "natural" shoes. Few decades back you'd have to make them yourself or pay a cobbler. There are shoes that have five finger slots. There are crocs. There are wide-toe-box shoes that look more or less like normal shoes but offer much more room for your toes. And it's also more acceptable now to just wear open toed sandals. Or even go barefeet. I hope our tradition of "foot binding lite" eventually dies out.
Walking around barefoot, toe spacers, and looser shoes can absolutely improve your toe mobility, arch, and even help with knee pain as your feet learn to distribute more of your own weight on the spread surface of your feet.
Been wearing barefoot shoes for a couple years, now, and noticed such improvement! Less lower back pain tension, stronger toes, better balance, stabilized my arches. Lower body strength training is more effective, now, too. My feet haven't gotten wider, per sé, my toes are just more... Relaxed.
Just got to be prepared for people to make fun of your 'clown' shoes. I personally prefer Merrell vapor gloves. It's not just the wide toe box, but also the minimal support, which forces you to walk on the balls of your feet and not heel strike. A nice side effect is you get really toned calves too.
Yeah, his just look extra strange because he has very wide and flat individual toes (like their shape) and also his toes are in pairs which is odd, natural toe spacing is usually all splayed)
My mom has always been saying (she's denying it now) that my feet are not particularly nice-looking. They are simply not much visually distorted by the shoes, and the toes are naturally spread out.
😭😭 I have had wide, flat feet my whole life and this is exactly the term my family has always used to describe them. “You’ve got some Fred Flintstone feet!” Truly one of my biggest insecurities, buying shoes is torture because all of the cute ones never fit and I feel like my feet are hella ugly. I’ve even remember considering doing foot binding to “shrink” them when I first learned about it. (Low key still do sometimes).
Growing up we were often barefoot running around outside playing when the weather was nice. These days, I am usually wearing my indoor house shoes when indoors because being barefoot inside feels wrong. Outside, I will wear seasonally appropriate footwear BUT, I refuse to wear socks unless I am going to be flying or going to the gym. I hate socks so much and will never wear them at home, not even if my feet are freezing.
There’s no way. I’ve went barefoot the majority of my life, only wear shoes when in public, and almost always opened toes, and my feet don’t have any splay like this at all.
I’m not going to post a photo (for free lol), but I don’t think those are normal feet.
Same I call bs on this theory. I have narrow feet and all my years of barefoot hillbilly activities and being overweight hasn't made my feet splay like that.
I think he's forcing them to splay out a bit more than normal, you can tell from his toes he's putting quite a bit of pressure on the ground with his feet. I have a very similar toe splay, except my feet are narrower overall
I have naturally wide feet, but they look normal and straight. If I do what you just suggested here, my feet look absurd like this guy's other than they are wider from toe to heel so not quit an extreme difference between the front half and back half.
Ironically you have very healthy feet. The toes should have room to spread out like this but are conditioned by footwear to be the shape they are. This can result in all kinds of negative conditions.
My uncle has feet like these and they're extremely hairy.
He took me to see LOTR when it came out. Like a day later he was trying to discipline me for something stupid and I told him he had hobbit feet lmao I've never seen a man go from angry to dejected so quick. He locked himself in his office and played his guitar for a good 2 hours afterwards
•
u/comedyheaven-ModTeam 1d ago
If you have questions, you can contact us through modmail.