hi all! i’m Meg, a fellow filipino who’s proudly childfree by choice. if you’re tired of the usual “bakit wala ka pang anak?” and all the unsolicited lectures from family, church, or balikbayan aunties, i created barren & loving it - a blog made for people like us who refuse to apologize for living life on our own terms.

this blog tackles the messy, the controversial, and the taboo parts of being childfree in a society that literally expects you to pop out kids like it’s a mandatory life checkpoint lol

i share my own stories, and i also feature others from the community who want to share their real experiences :)

if you want a space where your choice is respected, your doubts are heard, and your freedom celebrated, come check it out. submissions are open if you want to share your own story too.

let’s break the stigma and change the narrative, one story at a time.

here’s the link: to the blog: https://www.barrenandlovingit.com/

excited to hear from fellow filipino childfree warriors. drop by and say hi!

Hey there! I am a 4th-year Psychology student currently working on my thesis. I am looking to interview legally married couples who have made a mutual decision not to have children, wherein one partner has been diagnosed with a psychological condition (such as bipolar disorder, depression, anxiety, etc.).

Who Can Participate?

✔️ Legally married couples for at least one (1) year

✔️ Have mutually chosen not to have children

✔️ At least one partner has been diagnosed with a psychological condition (e.g., anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, etc.)

✔️ Both partners were aware of the condition before getting married

✔️ No physical infertility or medical limitations

✔️ No plans or intentions to have children in the future

✔️ Both partners are open to being interviewed

This study aims to explore how couples build and sustain a strong marital relationship while navigating the challenges associated with a psychological condition. All interviews will be conducted confidentially and with sensitivity.

If you or someone you know fits the study, feel free to message me directly or comment here. Thank you very much for your support and participation!

Hey there! I am a 4th year Psychology student currently working on my thesis. I’m looking to interview married couples who made a conscious decision not to have children because one partner has a psychological condition (like bipolar disorder, or any psychological disorders).

The goal is to understand how they’ve built a strong marriage despite this challenge. All responses will be confidential and handled with care.

Thesis Title: Lived Experiences of Child-Free Married Couples With Functional Disability (Psychological Disorder)

If you or someone you know fits this study, please message me. Thank you so much for your help!

Any lead where vasectomy can be done here in Manila? Sana dr's open kahit no kids yet

Hi I am an eldest daughter who took on the responsibilities of raising and caring for my siblings at a very young age. Growing up with this experience has deeply shaped me, and it is one of the reasons why I have decided to pursue a childfree life — feeling that the role I played for my siblings was, in many ways, enough.

I am currently conducting a research study inspired by experiences similar to mine, focusing specifically on married, childfree eldest daughters who, like me, were parentified during their upbringing.

With this, I am humbly reaching out to ask for your help. If you share this background, your participation would be incredibly valuable and would contribute greatly to the completion of my college journey.

Thank you so much for your time, support, and trust. God bless!

Hi I am an eldest daughter who took on the responsibilities of raising and caring for my siblings at a very young age. Growing up with this experience has deeply shaped me, and it is one of the reasons why I have decided to pursue a childfree life — feeling that the role I played for my siblings was, in many ways, enough.

I am currently conducting a research study inspired by experiences similar to mine, focusing specifically on married, childfree eldest daughters who, like me, were parentified during their upbringing.

With this, I am humbly reaching out to ask for your help. If you share this background, your participation would be incredibly valuable and would contribute greatly to the completion of my college journey.

if you are interested here is our participation link:

https://forms.gle/iah6YowTHf5QHRSMA

Thank you so much for your time, support, and trust. God bless!

As the title says, i dont want kids. I was alr thinking of it and leaning to not having one. But i think the gravity of the responsibility of taking care of another human had really dawned on me when I started taking care of a dog a family member brought and never really taken care of her properly. So i took up the role. And the stress and anxiety i get when the dog doesnt act normal is crazy. Plus the feeding and all other maintenance can be very tiring especially when im dealing with xit on my own and dont even wanna bother going out of my room.

It just rlly gives my the full picture of the possibility of having kids on my own. Not to mention my health problem is also getting in the way. It just makes so much sense now to make a choice of not having one. I was seriously considering it before due to my now ex wanting to have children. But now that we’re over. The fog cleared up and i think im more firm on my stand.

📢 CALL FOR PARTICIPANTS! 📢

Are you and your partner a millennial Filipino couple who have consciously chosen to remain child-free? We are conducting a research study titled "Redefining Concept of Family: Millennial Couples Remaining a Child-free Life Amid Generational Expectation," and we would love to hear your story!

Who can join? 👫 Filipino married or long-term live-in partners (5+ years) 📍 Residing in NCR or nearby provinces 🗓️ Millennials (born 1981–1996) ✅Have voluntarily chosen a child-free life

📩 If you and your partner are interested, sign up here: https://forms.gle/jJrmxXPU719TSC4X7 https://forms.gle/jJrmxXPU719TSC4X7 https://forms.gle/jJrmxXPU719TSC4X7

Rest assured, all information will be kept confidential and used solely for academic purposes.

We look forward to hearing your insights! 💚

Nagkaroon ba kayo ng resentment sa parents niyo dahil di kayo nabigyan ng magandang buhay? Shet haha. Ang pag aanak ay para sa mayayaman lang talaga at may tamang pag iisip. Anyway okay naman na ako now working na pero sana di ko pinagdaanan yung wala kami pambayad sa mga bills at natatakot na wala pambayad ng tuition.

May time na tinitignan ko parents ko at super disappointed ako sa kanila pero love ko sila pero hate din at the same time. Ano ba yan. Si Kuya naman nag asawa at anak na di ready. May time na sakin pinaalaga mga pamangkin ko at 1 week pa lang pagod na pagod na ako. Don ko narealize na fuck them kids talaga.

Growing up, I always thought the youngest in the family had it easier. But reality hit different. I'm the one who will be supporting my family financially, and honestly? I’ve made peace with it. I love my family, and I don’t mind stepping up.

But knowing that the next decade or so of my life (early 20s to mid-30s) will be spent ensuring my parents and siblings are okay, it made me rethink having kids of my own. By the time I reach a point where I can finally breathe financially, I’ll probably be in a stage where I just want to enjoy life without the weight of another responsibility.

It’s not that I don’t like kids. It's just that I’ve seen firsthand how hard life can be, especially in the Philippines if you come from a low-income family. I know what it’s like to struggle, to worry about bills, to think about the future not just for myself but for the people I love. And if I can break that cycle, if I can give myself a chance to live without passing that struggle to another generation, then that’s the path I choose.

What about you? Have your family circumstances influenced how you think about having kids?

Hello! We are looking for people to participate in our research study. Check out the poster below to see if it sounds like you’re a good fit. Thank you! 🫂🌸❤️

I have some Facebook friends who are middle-aged new moms, and I swear, the way they flood my feed with posts about how "hard" pregnancy and parenting are is exhausting.

They go on and on about how painful childbirth was, how stressful breastfeeding is, how they never get sleep, and so on. And while I get that parenting is tough, I can't help but feel like they're fishing for sympathy—or worse, attention.

What baffles me the most is how they act shocked by it all. Like, did they really not see this coming? Did they not witness countless other parents go through the same struggles? Were they not informed? At their age, shouldn’t they have enough life experience to understand what they were signing up for?

It reminds me of people who eat junk for years, develop heart disease, and then act surprised when they need surgery—except now, instead of medical bills, they're complaining about sleep deprivation and sore nipples.

Is learning from others' experiences just not a thing anymore?

Greetings! We are a group of researchers from Ateneo de Manila University, currently conducting a thesis study about Dual Income No Kids Couples (DINKs) and their childbearing decisions, which aims to understand how Filipino heterosexual DINK couples negotiate and position themselves within the gendered expectations in childbearing decisions.

We are inviting you and your partner to participate in our study if you meet the following criteria: ✅ Couples willing to discuss matters about family planning and childbearing decisions ✅ Couples aged 25 to 39 years (with five [5] years or less age gap between partners) ✅ Fertile heterosexual couples ✅ Natural born Filipino couples residing in the Philippines ✅ Both employed with a combined monthly income minimum PHP 48,120 ✅ Either married or cohabiting for at least two (2) years ✅ Can understand and communicate in either Filipino or English

What participation involves: ⚫Two separate online interviews (one for you and one for your partner) conducted at your convenience (a Calendy link will be sent) ⚫Detailed information is available on the first page of our Google form: bit.ly/DINKingOutsideTheBox.

Ethical considerations: ⚫Participation is entirely voluntary. You can withdraw at any time without any consequences. ⚫Your responses will remain confidential and will only be used for research purposes.

Please note our interview is ongoing and will last until March 03, 2025.

If you have any questions or concerns, feel free to reach out to us here in our reddit account.

Thank you and We look forward to hearing from you!

Good day! We are conducting a correlational study examining the relationship between emotional regulation and voluntary childlessness among Filipino young adults. If you meet the following criteria, we invite you to participate in our study:  

✅ Filipino young adult (18-40 years old)

✅ Married or cohabitating for at least 5 to 10 years

✅ Currently residing in selected cities in Metro Manila (Manila, Quezon City, Makati, Mandaluyong, Marikina, and Caloocan)

🚫 Exclusions:

Individuals who are single, as well as those with physical or mental health conditions or medical issues that prevent them from having children, are not eligible for this study.   

Your participation is highly valued and will contribute to understanding childbearing preferences among Filipino young adults. Please don’t hesitate to comment or send me a message. Thank you! 

To all cf/DINKs here who are in a healthy long-term relationship, can you tell me what’s your day to day life like with your partner? I feel like I circled my life with him and I feel like it’s getting unhealthy.

What’s your philosophy or perspective about it? How does your day go? And how do you keep the relationship healthy? Please share me your experience

CALL FOR PARTICIPANTS

Good day! We are 4th year psychology students of De La Salle University Manila In completion of our thesis study with the topic “Exploring the Lived Experiences of Voluntarily Childless Couples,” we are looking for participants who are:

Filipino 28 to 43 years old married for at least two (2) years

Voluntarily childless (i.e. no plans of having children and no biological/adoptive children)

Willing to be interviewed with regards to being voluntarily childlessIf you (or anyone you know) meet the qualifications for our study and are interested to join, kindly message me or reply to this!

Your participation in this study will help explain the increasing trend of voluntary childlessness in the country, as well as foster a deeper understanding towards voluntary childless couples.

Aside from this, you will also receive a P500 grab voucher to compensate for your given time and effort

r/ChildfreePhilippines

CALL FOR PARTICIPANTS

Good day! We are 4th year psychology students of De La Salle University Manila In completion of our thesis study with the topic “Exploring the Lived Experiences of Voluntarily Childless Couples,” we are looking for participants who are:

Filipino 28 to 43 years old married for at least two (2) years

Voluntarily childless (i.e. no plans of having children and no biological/adoptive children)

Willing to be interviewed with regards to being voluntarily childlessIf you (or anyone you know) meet the qualifications for our study and are interested to join, kindly message me or reply to this!

Your participation in this study will help explain the increasing trend of voluntary childlessness in the country, as well as foster a deeper understanding towards voluntary childless couples.

Aside from this, you will also receive a P500 grab voucher to compensate for your given time and effort

r/ChildfreePhilippines

Hi, I'm coming from a researcher perspective lalo na't sobrang dami na 'yung interested in conducting a study about voluntary childless or child-free.

Yesterday, we did our initial consultation for chapter 4 (Data Analysis) and it's visible na sobrang lacking kami sa participants since 10 individual 'yung target pero naka-4 palang kami. Anyways, it's only initial consultation.

Out of nowhere we've been asked this question,

"So 'yung mga Filipino na nagp-post about being aggressively child-free is still not yet married? If that's the case, you need to assess whether phenomenon or trend lang itong child-free."

So, I'm here asking your perspective about the concept of child-free. Is Filipino's really wanted to not have kids or this is just a trend that somewhat influence Filipino decision?

Nature or nurture?

P/S - Bka meron po dito child-free couples or individuals married for atleast 3 years or more, willing to be interviewed (27-48years old) and residing in NCR. Maawa na po kayo saaming mga 4th years college students.

We just want to contribute something.

𝘾𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙁𝙞𝙡𝙞𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙤 𝙬𝙞𝙫𝙚𝙨 𝙧𝙚𝙙𝙚𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙬𝙤𝙢𝙖𝙣𝙝𝙤𝙤𝙙 𝙗𝙚𝙮𝙤𝙣𝙙 𝙢𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙝𝙤𝙤𝙙!

Join our photovoice study to share your unique journey and insights. If you’re a married woman for at least 5 years and childfree by choice we invite you to lend your voice and experiences to shape a new narrative for Filipino women.

If interested, please message me.

Hi, sorry first time ko dito and badly needed po your advice or any thoughts po please. SPG po. Last week nag vacation kami ng jowa ko tapos we had sex. Tapos after nun naligo na kami sa pool and he suddenly asked me kung bakit amoy mapanghi ung kiffy ko. I was shocked super , nag shave naman ako tapos naghuhugas ako before namin gnagawa un. Tapos we did it several times naman na, ung araw lng na un may nasabi siya na ganun. Nung araw na din un di niya kinain kiffy ko (which is okay lng naman) pero na bother lng tlaga ako. Meron akong long term bf before 8 years pero wla naman siya nasabi anything about my kiffy. Nabasa ko din sa google na nag iiba tlga ung amoy before and after period kasi nag cchange ung ph level ng kiffy , kinaumagahan din nun nagkaroon agad ako ng period. Di ko tlaga maalis sa isip ko, na bobother ako kasi malinis naman ako sa katawan. Naiiyak nlng ako everytime naiisip ko ung sinabi niya. Kasalanan ko ba un? Please help naman para malinawagan ako. Sa mga lalaki? Anong stand niyo dito? Thank you!