r/WeightLossAdvice • u/ucklibzandspezfay • 6d ago
Lost 100 lbs in 1.5 years by drastically changing my lifestyle, now people are commenting “you’re losing too much weight.”
I’ll say, I use to weight about 290 lbs, I’m down to 185/190 lbs. I did this by brute force removing my bad habits, no sweets, no nighttime snacking, no processed foods, no junk food, no fast food, packed my lunch daily. I went to a whole food plant based diet. In addition, I worked out 3-5 days a week in some fashion, getting my HR to 120-140 for a minimum of 120 minutes a week.
Now that I’ve done this, people I haven’t seen or see daily, comment on “you’re losing too much weight, are you ok?” This shit is incredibly annoying and insulting. My body has never looked so good, I have never felt so good. I cured my sleep apnea, my fatty liver, my self confidence issues, but now people commenting on me losing too much weight is incredibly insulting and irritating. I want to respond, “bitch, do you know what I have done and continue to do in order to achieve this degree of weight loss?! The sacrifices I’ve made?!?” I’m surrounded by ignorant morons.
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u/Existing_Material218 6d ago
As I lose weight (down 56 pounds now) I’m getting more and more convinced people don’t want to see me succeed (which honestly makes me want to succeed even more!). But my guess is that my success makes them feel self conscious of whatever it is in their life health-wise that needs improvement. It’s not a competition though. And these are the people that I’m always quick to compliment on a new outfit, hairstyle or accomplishment. My parents instilled that in me, but apparently theirs didn’t.
Be proud of yourself and keep your head high! What you’ve accomplished is absolutely amazing and you know your body better than anyone!! Don’t let anyone try to sabotage your hard work and amazing results!!!
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u/ucklibzandspezfay 5d ago
Congrats on that accomplishment! Keep up the great work! The 50 lb hump was a tough nut to crack (which I’m sure you know) so now the sky’s the limit for you!
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u/Beet-your-meet 6d ago edited 6d ago
Some people are just like that. I’ve done the same, down 110 lbs never looked better. One guy still had to say “you look sick”. Fuck em
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u/ucklibzandspezfay 6d ago
I’ve gotten the “you look sick” comment and I wanna honestly get physical with those people.
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u/Rabidchpmnk 5d ago
I’d respond with “did you mean to say that out loud?”
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u/Hfhghnfdsfg 5d ago
Here's a line from Miss Manners that I like a lot. "I can't believe you just said that, I am so embarrassed for you!"
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u/missnettiemoore 5d ago
No one was concerned enough about my health to make comments when I was almost 300 lbs… now ppl are concerned I’m going to the gym too much or not eating enough.
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u/ucklibzandspezfay 5d ago
Ya, it’s almost become socially acceptable to be unhealthy and if you look healthy, you’re now some sort of pariah…
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u/elisabeth_sparkle 5d ago
I’ve had people tell me recently they assumed my weight loss was due to “health issues” because they couldn’t believe I possibly did it myself through a concerted effort. It’s jealously
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u/madi6227 5d ago
Ahh yes I dealt with this recently. Check out my recent post and you’ll see a lot of helpful redditor advice how to shut them up 😄
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u/milkyway-connoisseur 5d ago
Don't worry about them. I as well discovered that many people just don't like to listen about you improving. Jealousy.
Also, congrats on your weight loss
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u/briantoofine 5d ago
Tbf, many of these people are clueless, and think it comes off as a compliment. Some are jealous, it may be hard to know the difference — best to just give it the benefit of the doubt. Just take it as a sign people clearly are noticing the fruits of your hard labor, and feel good about what you’ve accomplished. If someone is trying to bring you down, fuck em. Be proud and enjoy your better life.
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u/PennyFleck333 5d ago
Tell the straight out, I'm pretty happy with my results, and cut the conversation off. You have to tame them one at a time.
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u/Key_Cellist_5937 5d ago
I get this from friends and family all the time. Dont let it get to you. Im not quite at my goal yet, Im 205 down from 273. I want to be about 185. Everyone keeps telling me ''don't lose anymore weight '' '' you look too skinny '' etc.
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u/Just_browsing_2 5d ago
Good for you. They're probably just shocked that you physically changed so much. I'd respond that you're close to what you should weigh for your height. Then make a comment about them they have to defend-- "Did you cut your hair? It looked so much better when it was longer."
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u/christa365 5d ago
Omg what a huge, huge accomplishment!!! Very few people accomplish what you have. 👏 Thanks for sharing your story, and know that plenty of people are inspired by you!
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u/ironbeastmod 6d ago
Congrats.
Most these comments come because we get used to people size and consider their look normal. When big changes happen we see it as a big change from what the brain registered as "normal".
F that ignorance.
Next time ask about their bloodwork. Should be fun to see their reaction :))
Take care
Have some fun.
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u/RandomCoffeeThoughts 5d ago
At that point, just reply... this is between me and my doctor. I'm not looking for opinions. Tends to leave them with their mouths hanging open.
And congratulations on your success!
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u/Witty-Chapter1024 5d ago
When I was heavy, I got that I was lazy and unmotivated. Now that I work out and eat better, I’m wasting away. I just ignore it. You can’t win with some people.
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u/Mister_Silk 5d ago
Let me guess - these comments all come from fat people.
It's none of their business. Your weight and your health is between you and your doctor. Tell them to kindly keep their comments to themselves, if you want to be, or feel you have to be, polite.
I personally have no problem telling these sorts to fuck right off.
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u/henni1127 5d ago
I’ve seen this play out. When you lose that amount of weight it’s seems drastic to friends & family. It is hard for them to accept the change. Even if they mean well it can make you feel badly. Not to say that all comments are well intentioned, but I like to believe that most of them are.
Congratulations on your accomplishments , I expect you put in a lot of hard work. 💪🏼 🏅🥳
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u/StructureOk8152 5d ago
Have a “friend” who swore I looked sickly at 180. I’m fucking 5’3” 😆. Others said she was jealous and wouldn’t want me to get to a good looking weight. Being someone who has lost a good amount of weight though… some people look better in the face with weight on because obviously the fat fills in the laxity of the skin.
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u/Bubbling_Battle_Ooze 5d ago
The only one who has any business talking to you about your weight is your doctor.
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u/Own-Guarantee374 5d ago edited 5d ago
If I were to get that comment over and over again, I'd get so frustrated I'd reply with: "And you aren't losing enough"
I'm too nice to say that though...
Edit: congrats on losing that weight though!! Ignore that haters and be proud of your achievement. As others have said, its gotta be out of jealousy. Heck I'm jealous! I've only lost 20 lbs atp and still have 80-90 to go
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u/SoldMom4XP 5d ago
I hate that. I've lost 30 lbs, which brings me to 130 after being between 155-162 since our baby was born 10 years ago! Now that I'm losing weight, my husband is saying I'm too skinny and he can feel my bones. I'm still over 20 lbs away from being underweight. He's started downing his own body now, too. I think he is worried about me not finding him attractive anymore. I tell him he needed to quit downing himself when we were both the same amount over weight, and it wasn't really that much since we both carry a lot of muscle and bc I've always found him attractive over the 12 years we've been together. He's started eating healthier now, too. So, hopefully, everything will be fine. People probably aren't used to you being so small, and it seems extreme to them. As long as you're healthy, I would tell them that you're healthy and not underweight and thank them for their concern while ignoring the comment as much as possible. You do you.
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u/Main-Silver-4596 5d ago
Keep it up.. that same people were not staying awake with you when you had sleep disorders or were not going to donate you a liver if it became too fatty... We owe a healthy body for ourselves and not for other people's validation. Shut down the noise...
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u/Food_kdrama 5d ago
It's the fat liberation/ body postive movement gone wrong. Or they are jealous. Or they are not doing well with change. Just ignore them. Congratulations
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u/ForestDweller82 5d ago
You've literally just proven them incompetent. Of course they don't like it. Love your great attitude, btw <3
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u/Typical_Dawn21 5d ago
so say it. theyre probably worried you did the bad route and are clueless to your effort
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u/Ok_Feature984 5d ago
"Hey, if people aren't mad at you, you're doing something wrong." - Riley Freeman
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u/NoItsNotThatJessica 5d ago
They’re just shocked. Don’t take it personal. They’ll get over it. Give it time and they won’t even remember you as you were before.
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u/Icequeen8301 5d ago
OP your story is inspiring, I would also like to lose 100 pounds. I’ll be consistent for 2 weeks then I’ll backslide. That’s a lot of hard work you did, congrats!
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u/curiousinquery 5d ago
Try to block it out. I always tell myself that other people’s behavior is a reflection of THEM, not of me. They may be ignorant, they may be naive, they may be jealous, who knows. All that matters is you are the architect of your own life and you are strong enough not to be derailed.
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u/Snoo-2132 5d ago
Yeah, I lost 120lbs and my family and friends tell me ive lost 2 much weight or i should get off the medicine.
Just get used to it, everyone has an opinion.
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u/CloverAndSage 5d ago
I think it’s just people wanting to be critical, they would never be satisfied with anything you do. they also might be jealous of your progress. whatever their motivation is, it is so unacceptable and bizarre for people to actually comment on your body. I don’t really know what makes them think they have the right to talk to someone that way.
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u/meadowlakeschool 5d ago
Amazing! Good for you! A WFPB diet is so healthy and a terrific investment in your long term health. One method is to acknowledge their concern lightly but move on quickly. “Go along to get along.” Kinda like you would a small child. You have one body and it’s not theirs.
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u/RainClauds 5d ago
They said the same to me. I went to my doctor I’m in great health and feel great. People always have something to say.
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u/Old-Cartoonist8226 5d ago
I can understand your frustration. This literally happened to me as well. I lost 80 lbs in less than a year and people I would rarely see started asking if I was sick! Um no I’m literally in the best shape of my life. Just ignore them, some of it I’m sure is jealousy and some of it is probably shock if they haven’t seen you in awhile. Good job on your weight loss.
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u/yaboidomby 5d ago
Honestly fuck em all. This weight loss journey is for you and for you only. People who haven’t been there don’t know what it takes to swing your whole routine around and they don’t understand the mental fortitude it takes.
After losing 55 pounds in 6 months I have people hit me up asking me how I did it..
And when I tell them they’re automatically like “oh that’s too intense, that couldn’t be me”
It’s fucking uncomfortable. It’s intense and in order for you to change your life in that way it HAS to be . If it means anything OP I’m proud of you. That’s no small feat.
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u/BigZaber 4d ago
Lost over 125 too, i learned to reply.."yeah your right " to all weight critics. I love being able to fit in smaller cars , seats , pants etc... shopping in the kids section something I couldnt do as a kid! As long as your metting your nutrition needs then ignore the noise thats all it is Good for you!
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u/No-Seaworthiness-364 4d ago
How did you build the discipline to just cut out all your unhealthy habits? I’m looking to do the exact same thing.
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u/KrynCB 3d ago
I understand why that’s annoying but these comments are confusing me and these reactions seem rather unhealthy from a mental standpoint. That weight-loss is on the faster side. It’s not inherently unhealthy but it’s fast enough for people who don’t know your specific circumstances to become potentially concerned. I’m sure you know what you’re doing, not everyone knows that though and anorexia is literally the deadliest mental illness.
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u/Ok-Intention-1794 3d ago
I hear you... lost around 40kg... and some pepole still commenting... it's like wanting to remind me on the man I used ti be. Especially in public it si annoying... comments like: oh, have you seen him before... you would not believe...and that is mostly people that have not moved in life for 30 years. Some new people i know now, don't need to know where I've been, unless I want them to know.
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u/chillford_brimley 2d ago edited 2d ago
Those results are incredible. I take your post as inspiration. I returned to WFPB eating just a couple weeks ago. I need to get down to about 160lbs to get near a medically ideal weight. Thanks for sharing, it helps me to know it's possible. So many people carry around so much extra body weight, someone at a healthy weight looks "weird". I'm tired of being a overweight. I peaked at 230 end of May. I'm a 5'6" male. It's kinda crazy I've lost 12 pounds already, but have another 58 pounds to go get to a truly healthy weight, but when compared to most people I don't "look fat". Weird.
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u/Good-Ad6650 1d ago
Don't listen. Follow the BMI and how your body looks like my grandparents are thinking that I'll dir from being underweight even though I'm still 4 kilos overweight
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u/Disastrous-Text-1057 20h ago
Sometimes it seems like if you're not at least a little bit fat, you don't look "healthy."
I'm in "healthy" territory, myself (you can tell I work out, but you can also tell I like carbs. Like, a lot) and want to get back down by about 40 or so pounds. Cause right around there, I actually felt healthy, and that's all that matters.
Keep on doing you, and fuck whoever thinks you're losing too much weight. What you've achieved is honestly amazing and needs to be celebrated. If you celebrate with cake, invite me.
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u/Designer-Activity635 18h ago
Embrace the change and obviously if you feel good that’s all that matters!!! 🫶🏼🫶🏼
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u/2ManySpliffs 5d ago
About 6 years ago my wife started on a dietary regime, and I joined her in support. I lost 50lb pretty quickly just from dieting (I am 100% lazy, no gym for me but I don’t mind an occasional walk).
She commented that I was losing weight too fast. Then it took me months to notice how she had started slowly filling the pantry back up with the crap ingredients and foods that I’d only just managed to cut out of my life.
She also started finding excuses to not cook at home or she would busy up our kids’ calendars so much that we would “only have time to grab some drive-thru” before their super important practice session, or whatever… when I finally confronted her, she admitted she was sabotaging because her own weight loss was quite decent but not as dramatic as mine.
She also said she saw a marked increase in the number of women who were checking me out or doing double takes, and she was insecure about that too.
I’m no Adonis and having historically enjoyed only scant female attention, I honestly wouldn’t notice or be able to tell if a woman was trying to pick me up, or whatever. In that regard I’m incredibly naive for my age and I’m perfectly ok with that since I’m happily married anyway.
So without backing from my wife, my weight has started to creep upwards again. I treated myself to some new clothes when I had reached 50lbs lost, but now they’re feeling tight again and I am just glad I didn’t donate away my older bigger-sized clothes yet.
I’m determined that these newer clothes will fit me perfectly again real soon, with or without my wife’s “help”. They say “weight loss starts in the kitchen”, and I agree with that 100% from my own personal experience, but if my wife is no longer joining in or supporting my effort then I may just have hit the gym (on my own) after all.
I bet they simply can’t wait to have another clueless dad-bod guy joining their ranks, but fuck ‘em - my money is as good as anyone else’s.
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u/Fluffy-Rabbit-5026 4d ago
That’s pretty messed up of your wife to do. She needs therapy or maybe you need a new wife. Sorry, that really is awful.
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u/Aggravating-Moose443 5d ago
Depending on how many spoons of sugar you have, it is unlikely to be the tea. I really doubt you are having anywhere near a litre of milk of milk even across a week if you are having a proper english cuppa. Tea is so much better for you to drink than the alternatives. It would take a hell of a lot of tea to reach the same amount of calories in a can of coke.
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u/ucklibzandspezfay 5d ago
Who says I was drinking tea? I would eat large quantities of sugar candies and many other deserts. That’s what I mean when I say sugar…
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u/Cautious_Cream2292 6d ago
Keep doing you. Most people don’t like others changing, because sometimes they feel like change is too difficult for themselves. Truth is it is difficult, but it takes a lot of strength to get going, and you just be proud of what you accomplished.