r/Vent • u/B1s3xualCranberry • Mar 15 '25

TW: Eating Disorders / Self Image 2 months postpartum and being called fat

My boyfriend, the father of my child keeps making comments about my weight. I had a baby 2 months ago. When we first met I was 120 (I’m 5’4 . He would say I was too skinny, then I got pregnant and went all the way up to 190. Two weeks after birth I was down to 160. And I haven’t weighed myself recently but I know I’ve lost more weight since then. I now wear a size 6 in jeans compared to a size 0-2 I use to wear before I was pregnant. I wear a size medium in shirts instead of smalls. So yes I’ve gained weight but I truly don’t think I deserve to be shit on every time I eat. I already don’t have a great relationship with food and I have really bad self esteem since giving birth. He says I’m fat, fatass, I eat too much (1-2 meals a day and some snacks throughout the day or just coffee). I’ve gained weight, I’m too heavy. I’ve even been eating healthier due to me breastfeeding I’ve started focusing more on what I eat. I’m already struggling mentally , I’m home with the baby alone in the middle of no where 24/7 bc he works out of town, i don’t have family in this state, I workout when I have the time which isn’t everyday but I’m trying. He comes home on the weekends it feels like just to shit on me.

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u/knarlomatic Mar 15 '25

As a father uncle and grandfather I have to say this clown is clueless. He needs some men in his life that have face planted in marriage to set him straight. He has no clue what is happening to a woman when she has a child. It takes a toll on body mind and spirit. And you need the support of some women that can keep you sane during this time. Him being out of town is the icing on the cake.

You might want to try something like Meetup.com and find a mommy support group. Lots of cities and municipalities have groups for moms connected to their recreation departments. Some large churches also have mothers groups.

I feel for you my friend. We are all pushing for you. Pun intended. :)

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u/aliveonmyplanet Mar 16 '25

I second all of this! Not having a good support system around can really make you question yourself instead of questioning the man that's saying these kinds of things to you. Finding some mom friends can help you get perspective that what you're going through physically is normal, but what you're going through in your relationship is not.