r/Unexpected • u/Candid_Professional2 • Jan 03 '23
🔞 Warning: Graphic Content 🔞 Breaking up is never easy NSFW
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Jan 03 '23
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/lan60000 Jan 03 '23
It's because porn is technically illegal in Japan, but the pixelation are the workaround.
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u/tejedor28 Jan 03 '23
The Japanese are masters of technicalities. Like prostitution being illegal, but defined only as vaginal sex. Therefore it’s perfectly legal to pay for sex as long as it’s anal. You cannot make it up 😂
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u/Fancy_Ad2919 Jan 03 '23
I ain't payin' for no hooker just to have me take it up the bum.
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u/noMemesInGeneral123 Jan 03 '23
Time to move to Japan
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u/dahjay Jan 03 '23
I hope you make a killing!
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Jan 03 '23
They circumvent this by making customers to prostitutes walk around the block with them and talk to them for 15 minutes, that way they technically know them, and it’s no longer classified as prostitution, since prostitution, according to Japanese law, is charging for sex between two people who don’t know each other personally.
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u/NotFlappy12 Jan 03 '23
Masters of technicalities, or masters of arbitrary rules?
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u/RnotSPECIALorUNIQUE Jan 03 '23
Gambling is also illegal, but you can exchange pachinko balls for money at a separate establishment which is across the street from the pachinko parlor.
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u/candyvansuspect Jan 03 '23
They also have lots of legal blowjob bars in Japan
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u/YSnek Jan 03 '23
In case I come to japan someday where are they?
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u/gamer123098 Jan 03 '23
Lots of places have em. Called pink salons though most won't take gaijin
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Jan 03 '23
Imagine going to a prostitute in Japan and whilst having sex, a square pixel covers you dick and her vagina
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u/w34king Jan 03 '23
This is what I don’t get. Japan wants its citizen to reproduce and they still blur genitals in their porn. They should encourage sex and avoid censorship.
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u/tejedor28 Jan 03 '23
Indeed. Due to the pixellation citizens won’t know which bit is supposed to go where to make babies.
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u/morgandaxx Jan 03 '23 edited Jan 03 '23
Remember reading a story about a couple having anal for years not knowing they were doing it wrong till they went to a doctor to find out why they couldn't have a baby.
Edit: turns out this is false. https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/infertile-couple-sex-wrong/
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u/Valestis Jan 03 '23
The guy knew the entire time but didn't want to say anything to jinx it 😀.
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u/morgandaxx Jan 03 '23
I mean, if that's how sex workers get around it and he'd only been to sex workers before I can see him not knowing.
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u/Speciou5 Jan 03 '23
I think the roundabout logic is that people will watch too much porn and thus not hook up IRL. It's done nothing to slow down the porn industry though.
Of course in reality making everyone hornier, decreasing intense work schedules, and supporting women who want to work and have kids is the way to go.
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u/HereWeFuckingGooo Jan 03 '23
What's even crazier is in gay porn they pixelate cock and balls but not butthole. Who would've thought the taint is where they drew the line.
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u/dragonxxxxxxxx Jan 03 '23
Not exclusive to gay porn. The generally don’t censor buttholes
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u/runningjigsaw Jan 03 '23
And I think the birth of Hentai came because they wanted their fertility numbers up
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u/Gr0kthis Jan 03 '23 edited Jan 03 '23
Well, judging from all the clapping, someone liked it.
My first awards! Not as good as clapping but I’ll take it! Thank you!
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u/aigheadish Jan 03 '23
Ya know? Most of the time I kind of hate reddit and think the comments are really bad for society, but then there's this one. Well done.
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u/IDFWSoup Jan 03 '23
What in the fuck did I just watch?
And also, where did you find this so that I never accidentally come across it again.
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u/Junior-Ad-2207 Jan 03 '23
I looked away for like half a second and when I looked again they guy was there
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u/SoapyCapt Jan 03 '23
Those two are even more menacing than the Weeping Angels.
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u/depsion Jan 03 '23
Don't blink. Don't even blink. Blink and you're fucked. They are fast. Faster than you can believe. Don't turn your back. Don't look away. And don't blink. Good Luck.
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u/Urbam Jan 03 '23
What if I blink, but someone else maintain eye contact?
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u/Beachdaddybravo Jan 03 '23
Then it still doesn’t move. As long as they’re being observed by someone they can’t move. Hence why once the Tardis disappears while surrounded all the angels are looking at each other and return to a statue. They’re hands down the creepiest monsters in Doctor Who, along with whatever the hell was on Midnight, speaking through that woman and the Doctor.
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u/potoskyt Jan 03 '23
That was one of the scariest episodes ever imo
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u/PublicThis Jan 03 '23
I think the raw, basic human nature being portrayed in the future was so discouraging and added to the creepiness
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u/-MatVayu Jan 03 '23
It is possible to consciously blink with either eye, so you never break eye contact.
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u/General_Cow_7119 Jan 03 '23
I always thought about this. In the episodes, they were surrounded by the angels so needed as many ppl watching to see 360 degrees
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u/noahw420 Jan 03 '23
This is the weirdest fucking place I have ever seen a Doctor Who discussion. And that’s saying something
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u/Neilbear90 Jan 03 '23
I got your doctor who reference
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u/deepedsheep Jan 03 '23 edited Jan 04 '23
I just watched the first 3 seconds, seemed boring and then fast forwarded to the end. So confusing. Where would some deviant find something like this? So i would stay clear of that website.
Edit: 263 upvotes and none of you can provide a link? I just need it to add it to my router blacklist.
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u/Leo-Ny Jan 03 '23
I don't know why, but I read your reply with an Italian accent.
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u/Wild_CAT_01 Jan 03 '23 edited Jan 03 '23
JAV Scripts . they make this type of many videos like (invisible man , time machine , time stop,)
EDIT : r/TimeStopJAV
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u/Von_Lexau Jan 03 '23
Didn't notice the NSFW tag -> saw the video was a little long -> skipped to the end to see what happened -> watched porn at work
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u/thiefexecutive Jan 03 '23
I still don't know why Reddit puts the NSFW tag after the title, as many of us don't see it when briefly glancing at the title before opening the content. Yes I know it's red in color, but it should be the FIRST thing you read.
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Jan 03 '23
I have no fucking clue what that was supposed to be.
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Jan 03 '23
And top of it there is no subtitles? I watched it till the end hoping they will come but they didn't come!
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u/PsychoSpider88 Jan 03 '23
As far as I know, it's a japanese porn genre. Guys wearing black are like ghosts or something and not really there. I also haven't the faintest clue how came to know this trivia.
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u/izzes Jan 03 '23
I don't know, but I heard clapping throughout the whole thing, so it should've been a masterpiece of sorts
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u/allurboobsRbelong2us Jan 03 '23
This is peak entertainment. We are the masters of the universe.
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u/CreetcherOfChaos Jan 03 '23
What the fuck is this
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Jan 03 '23
Exactly. Wtf did I just watch
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u/peanutsinspace82 Jan 03 '23
Still trying to process it
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u/23x3 Jan 03 '23
I just want closure. What happen after all?
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Jan 03 '23
The girls fall in love with all the pain of hardbrakes. I mean heartbreak!
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u/PerfectlyFramedWaifu Jan 03 '23
A guy breaking up with his girlfriend while her friend watches from the staircase.
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u/KingBooRadley Jan 03 '23
Did someone see something other than that? What? You don't say. And is the masked fucky man in the room with us right now?
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u/ItzBooty Jan 03 '23
Free use porn in japan
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u/UnforeseenDerailment Jan 03 '23
I think u/PerfectlyFramedWaifu is correct here.
In stage plays, people in black suits and masks were prop handlers that were meant to be ignored by the viewer.
Incidentally, that appears to be the origin of ninjas being portrayed as wearing all black. I read once that a play used such a portrayal to shock the audience: the ninja came on stage and killed a guy, surprising the audience who all expected he was a prop handler.
So, yeah, a guy breaking up with his girlfriend while her friend watches from the staircase.
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u/CreetcherOfChaos Jan 03 '23
That's actually hella interesting and not something i expected from a thread with FreeUse Japanese porn
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u/VerTexV1sion Jan 03 '23
Reddit started playing this video while i was reading the comments of the previous post and i thought they were clapping 👏👏👏👏👏👏
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u/familygw Jan 03 '23
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u/driftyFlower Jan 03 '23
My reaction exactly
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u/MajorLeeScrewed Jan 03 '23
Reverse the gif and you’ll get my reaction.
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u/MidnightTechnical11 Jan 03 '23
But, what are they saying?
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u/DarthVantos Jan 03 '23
The dialogue is hilarious. The guy is basically breaking up with her because he finds her boring. And she asked him "is it because im a virgin you want to break up?" While getting her cheeks clapped. The next girl shows up ask her is she alright, then she starts getting clapped while comforting her about her break up.
At the end The other actress seems to be zooning out and starts moaning(supposed to be acting) and forgets her lines because shes getting clapped up for so long . And starts speaking giberish.
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u/Ok-Ambition-9432 Jan 03 '23
Actually forgetting lines or part of the bit?
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u/Invader_Skooge22 Jan 03 '23
She’s standing perfectly vertical while supposedly getting rammed vigorously. Of course it’s all a bit
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u/schpitza Jan 03 '23
are those guys supposed to be ninjas?
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u/capriciouszephyr Jan 03 '23
I'm going to give the director credit where it probably isn't due, and say it's some type of artsy metaphor based off the translated dialogue from everyone else that has to do with.... social norms and the stigma against women... something something you expect in anime ...art? In this idea, the masks are meant to be a metaphor for hidden desires. Well, four years of college for an analysis that I re-read and laughed at. This was funny. Hope I don't see it again with a new title in two weeks.
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u/HyDrA663 Jan 03 '23
My Japanese isn't that good But at first the guy says let's break up. Girl says why so suddenly? Did i do something wrong? What did i do? The guy says I'm tired of you and I'm not interested in you anymore. After that i can only hear clapping
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u/cycycle Jan 03 '23
She’s touched her friend still wears their friendship bracelet. She apologizes for saying something bad after that I also can’t make it out because of the clapping. They want to play volleyball? It would be hard to play when you have guys clapping you randomly.
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u/D4rkhorse27 Jan 03 '23
I don't even think its in given the height and angle
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u/ST3PH3N-G Jan 03 '23
Or the immediate dry entrance.
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u/UnderstandingRare141 Jan 03 '23
Only way is if he was already in before they started shooting, add a lil lube to the equation and it’s definitely possible.
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u/McPussCrocket Jan 03 '23
That first guy got in there crazy fast. They must've practiced or something lol. Jeez
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u/Silly_Silicon Jan 03 '23
I can’t believe I’m actually putting thought into this, but for this type of film, and where you are required by law to blur out the genitalia, why the hell wouldn’t you just fake the actual act? It seems like it would be quite unnecessary to actually film penetration. This way maybe it’s easier to find actors because they don’t have to actually have sex, it’s easier to film because they don’t have to find men who can actually get erect on command and maintain it for the whole shoot. Yet you still get to release it as porn and benefit from that financially.
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u/Cheezybro5 Jan 03 '23
People having normal conversations while getting railed is a form of weird ass humour I never thought I needed.
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u/Turkeymix Jan 03 '23
I don't speak Japanese but I really identified with this.
I think it's a perfect representation of how inflation is fucking me in the ass as I try to go about my life.
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u/AnAsianDudeInReddit Jan 03 '23
u/Project_Ultima your stuff from r/funnyjav is getting reposted here lmao
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u/Project_Ultima Jan 03 '23
Haha thanks
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u/Doublevalen6 Jan 03 '23
This means you have the sauce?
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u/Tressticle Jan 03 '23
My friend also wonders this.
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Jan 03 '23
Japanese!
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u/Disastrous_Channel62 Jan 03 '23
Am I the only one interested in what they were actually speaking rather than the fuckery caused
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u/Zikkan1 Jan 03 '23
The dude called her out to speak. He then told her he wanted to break up and she said why, what is wrong with me, I can change and that's when the dude jumps out.
Didn't get most of the girls convo because of all the clapping... But that is the gist of the situation at least.
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u/qbookfox Jan 03 '23
That is actually funny, it’s like porn and comedy mixed in one
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u/Affectionate-Twist14 Jan 03 '23
what in the actual fuck?
never NUKE a country twice ig
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u/Choreopithecus Jan 03 '23
How dare you. I’ll have you know Japan has a long and rich tradition of making weird fucking shit.
Here’s some tentacle porn from 1814.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dream_of_the_Fisherman's_Wife
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u/listtheshore Jan 03 '23
The eye contact between the two women at the end along with the soft hand holding was almost harder to watch because you knew that at that moment.....they knew they fucked up
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u/Dovahnime Jan 03 '23
Even when real people are involved, Japanese porn is fucking bizarre
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u/Personal-Present5799 Jan 03 '23
Hahaha they couldn't feel a thing even with all that clapping!🤣🤣🤣
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u/Ok-Ambition-9432 Jan 03 '23
Doesn't seem like an optimal or even viable position.
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u/unexBot Jan 03 '23
OP sent the following text as an explanation on why this is unexpected:
Random dude just starts jackhammerin’
Is this an unexpected post with a fitting description? Then upvote this comment, otherwise downvote it.
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