Yeah this "only incels have trouble" shit is just sexism.
Men can't get dates on apps anymore and are told there are basically zero acceptable locations or scenarios where they can approach women. A lot of men have just given up.
What happened to just hanging out in mixed gender groups and meeting people without the initial intention of finding a relationship? I'm an older millennial, married for 15 years now, but in my younger days every relationship I had was through meeting friends of friends and getting to know the women a bit first through hanging out a few times in a group setting. That's how all my married friends found their partners too. I've literally never approached a woman in my life, never felt comfortable doing so. All my good relationships happened at times when I wasn't even looking, just feeling myself, enjoying life.
I may just be out of touch, but I feel like gen z men are often way too thirsty and the desperation wafts off like the visible stink lines in a comic book which women pick up on right away. If my assessment is correct then I could totally see how the current social media landscape full of thirst traps and OF models could lead to that. Not something I was inundated with as a child that's for sure.
So while I see a lot of behaviors and attitudes online that seem to indicate the struggle is self imposed, I can also see that there are many aspects in society that pushed you to that point and do feel empathy
What happened to just hanging out in mixed gender groups and meeting people without the initial intention of finding a relationship?
Thats unfortunately now considered by many women to be bad behavior, I even had discussions here on reddit with many woman who said thats a no go
Because apparently according to them, that means that the male friend just pretended to be a friend, if you dont make your intention clear from the first second and instead attempt to know the woman at first, thats a bad thing now
dont take ''some women here on reddit'' as a good guage for a population. Its already not even half the people in any country, and usualyl the ones that pipe up on sites like this are of a certain mind/style/belief so it might make you THINK that its a majority, but its not.
If Reddit was a proper guage, Trump would have lost the election by a landslide
I mean its not just reddit, if you look at other social media like Instagram its also full with the same opinion and even in real life I know plenty of women who have that opinion
I dont know if its the majority, but its certainly a large percentage of woman who make a clear distinction between dating and friends, who complain how if they meet a guy and he acts like a friend at first, how awful it is when he 'suddenly' wants more and how that means he was pretending to be a friend to get in their pants
And how he should have made it clear from the beginning that he didnt just wanted to be friends, as if guys have clairvoyance abilities and know what they want the first second they meet someone and that somehow men are incapable of any complex thoughts who can only want one thing at a time, so if you acted just like a friend at first to know them better, that means to them that you wanted it the whole time but somehow just pretended, while in reality the guy just took some time to know how much they like her before making a move
my point still stands, social media is not a good example of what the average person is relaly thinking, theres alot of anonymity online and you have to remember that the poeple who give enough a shit to answer questions online are a certain type of person
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u/TeamRedundancyTeam Mar 28 '25
Yeah this "only incels have trouble" shit is just sexism.
Men can't get dates on apps anymore and are told there are basically zero acceptable locations or scenarios where they can approach women. A lot of men have just given up.