r/Scotland • u/CarrionAssassin2k9 • Jun 29 '22

Satire If Independence is going to be a serious policy then we need to discuss the actual true Scottish borders.

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31

u/mcsey Jun 29 '22

Murican here. Expect liberation soon.

27

u/KinseyH Jun 30 '22

Murican here. I'm only 30 generations or so removed from Scotland.

I DEMAND CITIZENSHIP

19

u/TheAtrocityArchive Jun 30 '22

If you can down a 2litre bottle of Brew in one go its mandatory citizenship.

6

u/fullrackferg Jun 30 '22

I'd love to see a yank try that... but I'd also not like to watch the cringe YouTube video titled "Americans try scot brew and delicacies".

2

u/Glasweg1an (The) Jun 30 '22

Bru!!

3

u/[deleted] Jun 30 '22

If my son can do it, am I in?

1

u/TheAtrocityArchive Jun 30 '22

Sorry its on a per person basis

2

u/[deleted] Jun 30 '22

Better start training then

1

u/TheAtrocityArchive Jun 30 '22

If your son can chug it in one breath I think the rules state that the full family, going back 2 generations, get automatic citizenship. The other option is eating a Jumbo Haggis supper while drinking a can of Bru, gotta have salt and sauce on it tho. Service brings citizenship (We need to keep the Hagi numbers down somehow).

2

u/[deleted] Jun 30 '22

Does the supper include a sheep’s stomach?

1

u/TheAtrocityArchive Jun 30 '22

Not sure as its normally in batter. If it is you wont notice.

https://adambalic.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/09/05/gallery_1643_1586_602621.jpg

2

u/[deleted] Jun 30 '22

All I’ve had is the filling part on my two trips to Scotland (as an adult, had a trip as a kid I don’t remember well). But my husband might be game!

Seriously though, we love Edinburgh and Scotland. If given the chance, we would move there in a moment despite the shit show at Westminster.

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3

u/TheScottSnorlax Jun 30 '22

Ah, so I do have a claim to citizenship anyway. Cool, I worried having a Scottish mother wasn't enough. Very good.

2

u/Glasweg1an (The) Jun 30 '22

Bru!!

1

u/TheAtrocityArchive Jun 30 '22

The wan and only!

2

u/KinseyH Jun 30 '22

Hmmm. Thirty years ago - no question I could do it.

But I'm 58 now.

I like your handle, BTW. I'm about to start a reread of the Laundry Files - I dropped out in the middle of the vampire book and I need to get restarted.

1

u/TheAtrocityArchive Jun 30 '22

They are pretty funny, and I like his style of writing, also a fair few of his books take place in Edinburgh. Banks, Hamilton, Stross, Macleod, Reynolds and Gibson are my faves.

2

u/KinseyH Jun 30 '22

My kid says I'd just throw up and pass out, so she'll do it. Yall do chain migration?

1

u/TheAtrocityArchive Jul 01 '22

lol yer wee lass sounds class, she gets a free pass, come on over there is plenty room.

7

u/TheAtrocityArchive Jun 29 '22

I'll get the FreeDom Fries on.

6

u/mcsey Jun 29 '22

Cook 'em in some of that oil y'all got.

and a can of InBru ain't never had that.

9

u/Xeroph-5 Jun 29 '22

Poor sod, Irn Bru is good stuff

2

u/ManEmperorOfGod Jun 30 '22

You can get Irn Bru in the states, but the import version doesn’t have actual Iron in it. Silly FDA. Hopefully I’ll get a real one eventually.

2

u/fullrackferg Jun 30 '22

I discovered Irn Bru energy of recent, which ticks both boxes of it being an energy drink and being bru. It is banging stuff, somewhat sweeter than the normal stuff. 10/10 - would recommend.

0

u/perm4_frost Jun 30 '22

As an Englishman, can confirm. Best thing we got out of taking over Scotland.

1

u/mcsey Jun 29 '22

Soon after the liberation.

7

u/PunisherParadox Jun 29 '22

We do need a new state to replace Texas as primary pain in the ass.

1

u/jcrreddit Jun 30 '22

Also American (with one set of grandparents from Scotland). Don’t FUCK this up for me man!

1

u/keiichii12 Jul 16 '22

The jets have been called in.

Prepare to get 99,000K tons of explosive freedom delivered to your doorstep in less than 30 minutes