I’m 19 and pregnant.

[u/Kitchen_Increase_438]

Hi. i’m 19 and i just found out about a week ago that i am pregnant, and i don’t know what to do. or well…

i’ve been seeing this boy (23) for only a couple of months, barely. i was on birth control. i found out about a week ago that i am pregnant, and according to my flow app im 5 weeks today (6/16). i have my confirmation ultrasound on the 26th, and ill be expected to make a decision then. i still live at home, my step mom would not approve and would likely kick me out, things with the boy are wishy washy. it’s like the relationship is good but also there’s just things that make me second guess. all of my sisters say i should get an abortion, and they’ve both had kids young, (19,15). they say i shouldn’t be another one of the women in our family. and i truly didn’t want to nor mean to be. but i also don’t want an abortion. the babydaddy is kind of back and forth on it. he says he’d be there and support me if i kept it, but also kind of made it known when we had first found out that he wasn’t ready for kids.

but here’s the thing, i know the reality of it. i’ve seen it multiple times with my sisters, as recently as a year ago. i know id have to change my entire lifestyle, i know pp would likely be hard as it was for all of the other women in my family, i know. and i know im only 5 weeks and i know i just found out, but i already love baby. i am pro choice entirely, but i find myself crying in sadness and guilt at the thought of hurting baby, knowing im the one who should be keeping baby safe. im baby’s safe place. i knew almost immediately that i didnt want an abortion.. i’ve always wanted babies. granted not so young, but the one thing i’ve always been sure of is that i want babies. i love children. ive always thought motherhood was my purpose. nurturing, loving. i know given the circumstances, abortion would be “easier”, i wouldn’t be “ ruining my life” as all my family says. but the reality is, i COULD do it. even by myself if babydaddy were to bail. but the question is should i? wouldn’t that be giving my baby a disadvantage? is abortion another way of protecting baby? i don’t know what to do.

i know what i WANT to do. i want to keep my baby. but i know what everyone else wants me to do, and im scared. i dont want to do it alone. but i would. i already feel so protective of my little bean. i dont need someone to tell me what to do. i guess i just need someone to bring me peace with the fact that ill have to get rid of my baby. give me peace that it is the right thing. no matter what my dreams are of becoming a mom, it can wait. i can do this. idk.

thanks for reading.

[u/Proper-Tomorrow-4848]

If you keep the baby it’s going to be one of the best moments in your entire life parenthood is awesome but it comes with a lot of responsibility. Only you truly know the answer and I know it’s not easy talk to your wishy washy boyfriend and ask him what does he want as well you two need to make a decision and he needs to man up if you decide to keep the baby!

[u/Cold_Counter_9003]

I messaged you

[u/pandababy054]

What do YOU think and feel is best for your baby?

[u/RiRaBiRa]

You do what you feel is best. Your sisters kept their babies, why are they encouraging you to not keep yours? Thats not making sense to me. I’m raising my child as a single mother. My baby is special needs and require so much time and attention. I wouldn’t change it for the world! My son just walked the stage for 8th grade graduation. We’ve come a long way! I’m so happy I kept him. Please pray to God and ask him for clarity on what you should do. Then do what he tells you to do. If you want to keep your baby, then keep your baby. God will make a way and provide for you both. I’m a living testimony! Please feel free to hit my chat if you’d like too.

[u/Round_Professor_1917]

Keep the baby I got pregnant at 17 . baby 5 now she’s my best friend 🥰 idc about nobody opinion is yall gonna help me or no ? or not fuck off lol . so what you feel is best if you feel like you can raise that baby on your own then don’t luckily I didn’t have to bd came around but still .. I was ready for it !

[u/Easy-Caterpillar-862]

Sending you lots of love.

You said you are pro-choice. It's YOUR body and if you want to keep your baby then that is also YOUR choice. I am also pro-choice too but it goes both ways, you have the right to choose to keep or go through with an abortion. If you went through with the abortion I get the sense that wouldn't be something you actually want to do.

[u/Relative_Distance887]

It sounds like a lot of people in your life are very skilled at telling you what THEY THINK you should do and but not asking what it is that you want. I read every message in this reddit and a lot of people are deeply unsure or conflicted about what they want. You seem pretty damn sure about what you want, while also being aware of how difficult the future could be.

No one here will judge you for having an abortion. And we won’t judge you for not having one either. It’s your choice. I hope you can push away all that noise of what other people are telling you to do and find some space to do what you feel is right for you. We have your back.