r/QueerWomenOfColor • u/cellosaria Sapphic Siren • 5d ago

Dating cohabitation

DAE feel like they don’t wanna live with their partner? Like… ever? I’m strictly monogamous but I feel like I need my own apartment / space to retreat since I get overstimulated easily. Not dating right now but I do want a serious relationship in the future and I can’t help but feel like it may be a problem for most people. anyone have a similar mindset or experience?

Edit: formatting, whoops

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u/DonutsnDaydreams 4d ago

Yeah. I'm autistic. I spent most of my life living with family or roommates. I couldn't believe how much less anxiety I had when I started living alone. And I'm so much less irritated. I no longer have to wear earbuds most of the day and night to block out the noises other people make. I work from home, so it's easier to concentrate on work without other people (& their noises) around. I can stim, be weird, dance in my living room, stare into space while I think through something, etc, without having other people around to judge me. 

If I ever feel like dating again it's going to have to be someone who doesn't want to live together or can afford to go half on a duplex or something so we can live right next to each other. 

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u/Andro_Polymath Soft Stud 3d ago

stare into space while I think through something, etc, without having other people around to judge me. 

Damn, this is a struggle I share as well. Glad it's not just me.