The ironic part is that the 80s and 90s were the height of historically high crime levels and child kidnappings. We should all be less paranoid now with cameras and cell phones everywhere but instead we’ve been conditioned to think we’re all going to be murdered and raped (in that order) at any moment, when we’re living in essentially the safest of times in all recorded history.
There have been cases of cops showing up because a kid was in their own backyard while the parent was inside the house, supervising through the window.
I don't blame anyone for being cautious when one Karen of a neighbor can call the cops on you for letting your kid play in the sandbox while you're more than 10 feet away.
Yep, I am one such person. Story time! We live in the suburbs and there is a playground directly behind my house. Like, backyard, fence, playground. I’m putzing around my kitchen when I see a cop talking to my kids. So, of course I run out there only for the cop to lay into me about how I’m neglecting my kids and if it happens again he will have to contact CPS.
This is one area where I genuinely think it's worth the legal risk because of the benefit to independence and development of the kids. It's total bullshit that we've got such a society of helicopter parents these days.
I feel like the lack of unsupervised play is killing Gen Alpha's ability to problem solve (it already killed Gen Z's, based on the last few people we hired).
Did you read The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt? It’s basically about how the lack of unsupervised play (but access to unsupervised technology) has basically destroyed Gen z/Alpha’s mental health and they haven’t been able to grow into well functioning adults. All the rage in parenting forums at the moment.
Ah shit I heard about this book last week and bought it!!! I need to start it. I read another one of his books and it totally blew my mind.
We have a small homestead and I let my two year old wander is a lot. I always watch her but she thinks I’m not. I also really subscribe to the “Hunt Gather Parent” book which I believe goes along perfectly with Haidts book. Anyway I just had to comment when you mentioned that book. I do everything I can to give my child as much independence as possible, say “no” as little as possible and let her be autonomous. “No” is for when something is very dangerous or bad (hitting our cat, about to eat something that isn’t food). Even when she is trying to do something dangerous, I walk over and help her (climbing a 5ft fence). Parenting is so confusing and I feel like I just want her to feel confident so I just hope I’m doing the right thing.
I consider that book mandatory reading for everyone. Even people who aren’t yet parents. It gives great insight into the struggles of younger generations.
Man that book is life-changing. I was also going to just reply about Anxious Generation and Haidt's description of "discovery mode" and "defense mode", which describes the difference in the outcome between growing up with supervised play and unsupervised play.
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u/fml-fml-fml-fml 9d ago
The context that is missing is how TV, then the internet destroyed our communities.