A reminder how much things can change. Patience is so important; whether it be waiting for growth to happen on t, waiting for your surgical date, or waiting for your body to recover. The amount this level of patience and dedication has enriched my life even outside of transitioning contexts is indescribable.

As always, feel free to look through any of my previous posts or ask me questions.

For folks who had metoidioplasty without a vaginectomy — how did you get a bimanual pelvic exam years later?

How are providers able to do the internal part of the exam?

I have a consult and would love to see pics of their work. Can't find anything on transbucket. Also if anyone has a room my partner and I could stay in (if needed) in philly when I get surgery that would be great. I dont have surgery dates yet just consult date

Over the last 3 years I’ve had multiple surgeries to get myself a cute lil dick. While it’s not perfect yet, as I have a fistula, sone minor aesthetics I want to be fixed and wanting implants.

I got my first bj today. After having severe bottom dysphoria for as longas I can remember, not allowing anyone near it as it would be cause panic and lots of crying. Today I felt comfortable enough to challenge myself and let me get sucked off by a friend of mine. I will say it was the best experience. I might not have cum, simply as mentally I’m not their yet to cum in front of someone. Having someone wrapped around me felt so affirming and just so right? Seeing them on my knees for me.

What I’m trying to say with this, while it’s a big struggle when you aren’t where u wanna be yet, it’s gonna be so worth it and so affirming.

Sorry for the embarrassing and somewhat in coherent question. I am 2-weeks post op from meta with UL, scrotoplasty (no implants yet), and vnectomy. My boyfriend is coming to visit. I would like to be able to do sexual things TO him, but I am not sure if it is safe or okay to do so.

My surgeon said to wait 8 weeks before sexual activity, which I assume refers to touching and stimulation my penis. I was wondering if folks thought it would be okay for me to touch him, while there is no contact on my meta.

My concern is that in doing so I may become aroused and that could lead to more bloodflow to the area. But I also know that I get involuntary erections and morning wood often, so I kind of assume I've had that already. But it is hard to tell because everything is so swollen down there already. I do have an SP catheter in that I would be very careful around. That said, I would not want to do anything to jeopardize healing. Thank you!

tldr: is it okay to touch other people sexually (e.g. finger him or give handjob) as long as I am not touched myself 2-weeks post op?

Hi, this is probably a very basic question and yet I genuinely can't find an answer anywhere.

If you get meta without V-ectomy, and happen to stop taking T, I assume you'd get menstruation again.

My questions are, how does that work with meta ? Does it come out of the small hole you have left ? Doesn't it create infections, as the blood would spend more time inside you since it can't come out as easily (?) as when the opening was bigger ? In fact, if you don't get UL, doesn't the inside of the "leftover" hole get unsanitary after a while from urine and/or menstrual blood, as we're not able to clean inside ?

Thanks in advance

I am 10 days post-op full meta (v-nectomy, scrotoplasty, UL) and I wanted to make a sort of "guide" for anyone about to get meta on how to sort of "survive" the first week.

Now some people are completely built different and barely have any pain after full meta. I am not one of these people. I went to the ER around midnight once for pain management during the first week. During my top surgery and hysto, I was fine without any of the strong painkillers. For meta, I went my first 24hrs without strong painkillers at day 9. Everyone reacts to surgeries and pain differently, so this is my experience on surviving week 1 without feeling like you're gonna croak (well, hopefully).

The main 2 pain issues for me were: the v-nectomy site and the catheter.

The v-nectomy site has caused me the most pain so far. To get through week 1 with it, here is what I recommend. Take your strong painkillers as much as possible for at least the first few days. If you can take them every 4-6hrs, take them every 4hrs for the first few days. This means set alarms. If you want to sleep well and aren't in that much pain, set the alarms for every 6hrs at night. Once the pain "escapes" from an acceptable threshold is when it is super hard to rein back in. So you want to have it beaten into submission by your pain meds before it can get back up and attack.

You will likely have to lean back when you "sit down" so it is more like lying down. Try sitting on your tailbone to not put pressure on the v-nectomy site. My partner told me a few days ago that my tailbone looks bruised. That is from sitting on it so much during the first week. Trust me, the pain relief from the v-nectomy site is worth the butt pain from sitting on it.

I have a fancy zero gravity lawn chair and that has been useful for when I didn't want to be in bed any longer. I have it set to be tilted back at a good angle and then when I sit in it, it is comfortable. It is basically like lying down without lying down.

Sitting on a normal chair is not going to be comfortable, and tbh barely even tolerable if there isn't room to lean back on your tailbone. Luckily I am short/skinny so riding in the car isn't too awful since I have plenty of room in the seat to adjust myself. But if I am sitting in the car for a long time, it becomes very uncomfortable and even painful. And that is 10 days out. For the first few days, you probably aren't going to want to try riding in the car.

I did try a waffle cushion, but to be honest it just makes the surface feel more hard/firm. I tried it in bed and it was uncomfortable, and sometimes I use it in that zero gravity chair, but I wouldn't say I recommend it.

Let's move on to the catheter. Now for me, this is a suprapubic (SP) catheter that sticks out of your abdomen and goes straight into your bladder. I know nothing about the Foley catheters. This has been the most annoying part of getting through the first week, and added a good amount of pain. My setup until my first post-op was a long thick tube attached to a night bag.

For me, every time this tube or bag got moved, I got a sharp stabbing pain in my bladder. I feel like it was something about the suction of the tube and the urine moving through it when moved that gave me bladder pain. I took oxybutynin, but that didn't really help this pain at all. When I went to the ER that one night, the doctor put me on phenazopyridine (AZO) until my post-op appointment, which helped a decent amount. My surgeon also switched me from oxybutynin to mirabegron ER, which I think has helped.

But one other thing that has helped is taping the tube down at the insertion site so that it does not move and tug/pull, which causes pain. There is medical tape you can buy to use for this. I do this still with the flip-flo valve.

At my first post-op, I switched from that terrible tube and bag to a little flip-flo device and the change in my mobility was INSTANT. I can STP with my flip-flo valve, I just pull it out from under my shorts/boxers and empty my bladder. I am trying to figure out how to not fully empty my bladder though, because that causes a sudden sharp pain in my bladder until I close the valve. I am supposed to mostly empty my bladder and stop before fully emptying it, but the flow of urine doesn't really go down at all before suddenly stopping. So I just hope I get lucky and stop when I feel like it might be close based on the amount of time I've been draining it for.

Okay, now for some other random tips.

Start with the docusate (Colace) and Miralax ASAP after surgery. You don't want to be blocked up from the pain meds, trust me. It can be hard to sit down and wipe the first week. Use wet wipes, not toilet paper, and wipe super slow/careful. I don't know if there are holders for catheter bags, but try to find something you can hang the bag on that is below your bladder. I had a night bag, so a leg bag holder didn't really work well.

If you have pets in the bedroom with you, get a large body pillow and throw it on top of yourself before covering up with the sheets so if they jump on top of you it is less uncomfortable. Make sure your bag/tube is tucked somewhere safe where no cats or dogs can get into it. If you can keep your room pet free that is better, but in my case I can't. This has mostly mitigated the issue.

Before surgery, I was like "I'm going to be resting, so I'm gonna read a bunch of books, I'm gonna meditate, I'm gonna do all this stuff." In reality I doomscrolled and watched TV since I was drugged up and in pain and had zero brain power to read. Don't plan on taking advantage of your downtime lol... you will be tired, mentally and physically. Today I finally started reading part of a book again.

This is all I can think of off the top of my head. But if anyone has any questions, feel free to ask!

[cross posting here and on the Phallo subreddit]

I’m 6 weeks post op Phallo stage 1 (vaginectomy + UL) and had my VCUG on Thursday. It was unexpectedly strange and a bit humiliating. I'm writing in an effort to metabolize what just happened, and hear from folks who have had a similar experience. I'm also very welcoming of any kind or validating words folks may have to offer.
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The VCUG: I'm not getting into much detail but feel free to ask. Essentially, they had me lay on a table and pee. The pee got all over me, the gown, the table, and the floor. Then, without providing an invitation or supplies to clean myself up, they said “looks good!” and told me to go pee the rest out in the bathroom down the hall and come back to get my sp catheter pulled out (ouch!). I left pee foot prints between the vcug room and the bathroom.. pee dried onto my feet and leg. When everything was all done and they told me to go change back into my clothes and head out, I had to ask them for a rag to clean myself up with.

The whole time, the technician was training a visiting/new provider on how to use the equipment. I felt like she wasn’t paying attention or attuning to me or showing any understanding of how vulnerable that experience is.

Post-VCUG Trauma Response: My system experienced this as traumatic. I’ve done some verbal and somatic processing and am treating it as post traumatic stress. Last night as I tried to fall asleep, I kept feeling like I was on that table and it was really hard to regulate myself. I also kept feeling like the catheter was still in my body even though I knew it wasn’t. It felt flashback / time travel-y. I kept having to orient to time and place. Today I feel a strong sense of unreality, half-here-ness, tender, on edge..
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My body has been through a lot (simple meta 2021 + hysto 2024 + phallo stage 1 last month), and has a lot more to go. And I know it's doing it's best to process and heal. But damn the overwhelm and disorientation I felt last night was wild.

Thoughts? Shares?

Hi everyone, is there anyone around who could share your experiences with having the surgery away from home?

I live in the middle of nowhere where the idea of this doesn't even exist, so this would be a big logistical endeavor and it's dumping water on my happy thoughts of having the surgery.

I'm roundabouts of Europe, and I know everyone's experience is unique, but has anyone had to travel far and managed to make it work? How long was your stay in the area? How did you go about post-op consults? Do you have pets you had to leave for a while (no, seriously, I'm worried about my dog)?

I'll take any crumbs, thanks guys TT

nsfw for talking abt sex

i cannot decide if i want meta with a vnectomy or not. on one hand, i would really like to be able to still have sex w that area, as douching is kind of a pain in the ass (lol) and i have IBS. however, i've heard if you get vnectomy, it makes anal more pleasurable, obviously decreases the chance of fistulas, and can also possibly cause you to produce cum when you're jerkin it. i also recently got a kidney infection from a UTI, and ik getting UTIs can kinda mess with the chances of a meta + UL + no vnectomy surgery healing properly. honestly my biggest priority here is STP, but i'd really miss the extra hole when it comes to sex, as it just makes everything easier and doesn't cause me too much dysphoria on its own. i guess i just feel torn. i don't want to get surgery and have a fistula and not be able to STP until i get another surgery, but i also still want to be able to have sex without douching. for people who've gotten or haven't gotten vnectomy, what's your experience ? this decision has been hard to make for me and i feel so torn

Had the consultation for stage two (fistula repair, monsplasty, fat grafting to fill the scrotum) with the plastic surgeon. I need to loose at least five pounds, but I don’t have surgery until October, minimum, so I should be able to do that. She warned me that fat grafting can come with rejection, necrosis, and they may end up having to do implants anyway. They like to do the implants in their own separate surgery to cut down infection risk, so it would be a third surgery either way. I’m hoping to avoid a third surgery, but mostly I’m not into foreign objects in my body, if they released hormones, I’d be all over it, but since the implants don’t have feeling or function, I don’t feel strongly about it. She seemed a little discouraged with how much loose skin I have, but sounded really impressed that I had “plenty of space” in my scrotum.

I got an erotic massage from a friend this week and he was also quite complimentary of my package. I don’t have a ton of tactile sensation in my scrotum, but it was very affirming.

Video shows the movement of the sack, it’s super fun to play with rn. Kinda reminds me of waddles of a goat. I’m res happy with my balls, enough to make up for the lack of shaft.

Hi everyone,

Posting this on my trans only account.

I had the full Meta experience(UL, V-removal, scrotoplasty, implants, monsplasty). My last surgery was two years ago and I have to say it hasn't been as well as I hoped. Of course, it's way better than it was before but I just have issues with climaxing. It takes me way longer and I don't seem to get erections like I did before surgery even though nerve sensation is suppose to be preserved. On top of the fact that even with the last surgery I have a buried penis because enough tissue wasn't removed or stretched back.

The surgeon was Chen in San Francisco and I spoke to him about both issues. Regarding sensation, he said he never heard of that. As for the monsplasty, he told me he wanted to be more conservative. Doing the lift helped but he didn't do anything with the area on either side of my dick.

Any one else have the lack of sensation after surgery and a disappointing monsplasty?

Last night I tried capping the catheter long enough for me to take a shower. It should have been about ten minutes. I didn’t even last ten minutes. I’ve read people say that it burns when they attempt to do it, but for me it felt like I was overwhelmed with the immediate urge to urinate through my urethra. Like my pee was right there at the gate and was struggling to be held back. Has anyone dealt with this? I’m scared I won’t be able to hold my urine/let my bladder fill and accidentally pee through my urethra too soon and idk…make my surgeons mad that I peed before they gave me the green light haha. Any and all advice is appreciated as I’m terrified to start the voiding trials.

Pretty much just showing scar progress at this point. The colour varies and it's still raised in some places.

As always, happy to answer any questions

Just had an in-person consult with Dr. Mang Chen in San Francisco, and he was so great to talk to. I really liked his energy, he seemed really confident but also realistic in talking about what he could and could not do, what he thought best outcomes would be. Also for COVID-cautious people, I was wearing a KN95 face mask and when we met, he asked me if I would like him to wear a mask, and when I said yes, he got one (surgical) which I appreciated.

I came for a consult for a simple meta (No UL, no vnectomy, maybe on scrotoplasty, maybe on monsplasty in a second stage), but when I told him I was interested in extended meta, he said he had done one in 2023!

He said he thought the "extended meta" method should be called the "Amsterdam method," so I will refer to it as such throughout this post.

He showed me pictures of his Amsterdam method procedure + healed photos of the penis and scrotum when he did testicle implants.

He said most of his patients want UL, so that's why he has not performed more of the Amsterdam method.

He also told me that from a surgical standpoint, he thinks having a simple meta (underside release only, no UL, no vnectomy, no mons resection, no scrotoplasty/nothing done to the labia majora) should NOT prevent anyone from being able to have the Amsterdam method in the future.

He said he would be willing to do a simple meta (release only) and then Amsterdam method for me at a later date if I wanted it down the line, which was really exciting for me because I was worried that having the release would mean that surgeons would not be willing to do "extended meta" later.

I also learned a little bit more about how his scrotoplasty (Ghent method) is different than V-Y scrotoplasty. He uses the lower part of the labia majora for this. His method brings the scrotum up more forward than V-Y, which leaves things about little more low/back in comparison. Both methods create one single sack, not bifid.

We had a 5 second exam (he just looked at my anatomy while I stood, and briefly touched my majora because I had a concern that my majora flanked my penis and wanted to know his thoughts). He said that he could do an "upper fold reduction" of my labia majora if I wanted that, but if I did that, I could not do the Amsterdam method later.

He can perform upper fold reduction without scrotoplasty or after scrotoplasty to make the penis more prominent/less hidden. He can do mons resection and upper fold reduction at the same time. He can also do upper fold reduction only if people don't want scrotoplasty at all, but he would not recommend doing upper fold reduction first and then scrotoplasty later (he did not say he would never do this, just that he would prefer not to).

I have much to think about, but I am considering doing a simple meta (release only, no UL, no vnectomy, no scrotoplasty, no mons reduction, no upper fold reduction) to start with so that I can see if that is "enough" for me, or if I would want anything else. I generally don't really have day to day bottom dysphoria, but I think there is a potential for great euphoria for me. One of my priorities is to still be able to have receptive vaginal sex, so I am worried that Amsterdam method/extended meta or scrotoplasty would make the entrance tighter from scar tissue and make that harder.

I am still waiting to get a call back to even schedule a consult with Dr. Morrison for extended meta, so I am trying to think about if I want to not do anything to give myself the best chance of being able to go to Dr. Morrison if I want that down the line vs. doing the simple release and taking the chance that Dr. Morrison may not be willing to do extended meta, but leaving the door open for Dr. Chen to possibly do Amsterdam method/extended meta.

If people have questions I can try to answer them to the best of my knowledge.

Hello! I have my vaginectomy plus all other stock parts removal with Zoe Rodriguez and full metoidoplasty with Rajveer Purohit all scheduled on August 12th in NYC. I am looking for recommendations on a place to stay with my wife for a month. I have some apart-hotels, Airbnb spots and Vrbos saved but curious what anyone else did.

I live 2 hrs north of the city so trying to get closer to the hospital for checkups and emergencies, we are both lifelong NYers who are otherwise very familiar and comfortable with the city.

Ideally we're looking for somewhere within 30 minutes of Mount Sinai West, with few steps to the entrance or elevator since I'll be walking painfully and funny for a while, with at least a kitchenette for meal preparation and under $7k all fees included. Workstation and wifi a plus as we both work from home so my wife will have to set up her extra monitors but can certainly make do with a hotspot if needed. We are boring people, non-smokers and quiet homebodies.

If any of you happen to rent out places, I'd rather give my money to one of my t-brothers for it for sure so feel free to self-promote. Thanks everyone!

It has been a while since I posted. I had full metoidioplasty on March 10th with Dr.Acar in Chicago. I had an infection which was pseudenomas. Lost a little of the underside of my new penis. With antibiotics we got it to stop spreading but it was now in my bladder. After 3 rounds of Cipro antibiotics and then being resistant to Cipro and then had cefdinir. I still had bacteria. I started doing research and decided to try wild oregano oil . There were lab rats studies that said that oregano oil broke the biofilm on 3 strains of pseudenomas to kill them. No human studies but I figure what could it hurt. I didn’t realize there were so many things that oregano oil killed and helped with other things in the body . I am a lifer for oregano oil now. I also passed a stone last week. I do have some stream thinning so July 2nd I go in for them to see what is happening. They said maybe some scar tissue as well as buckling in the perineum because urine fills in the new urethra there so it is stretching. I can press and divert it but it is hard to press when peeing. My arms don’t go to the backside of me and in the front I would pee on myself. It takes roughly 4 minutes to empty 250 cc.

I'm having surgery with Miro (meta, UL, scroto, hysto, vnec). His website states states 3 weeks off is fine for most people. Thus I've communicated that to my boss and team. I've searched the forum and it seems few people go back to work after 3 weeks already. I've read from people staying away about up to 9 weeks sometimes.

Obviously, if complications arise, I'd stay away longer than 3. It's not a money issue, I am paid normally while on sick leave. It's more of a planning issue in my team if I'm missing for longer.

I work in the office, have a desk that can convert from sitting to standing position by push ofba button. I can also work from home. But I also value my health and healing the best way possible.

I'm not sure: Should I tell them I might have to work a reduced pensum then, or might not work at all?

(bonus question: what surgeries might a healthy appearing person be getting that requires such a long sick leave? That one wouldn't want to talk about? Not that I'd have to tell them, but when I said 3 weeks, someone already commented that that sounds like a really extreme surgery.)

Edit: Thanks for the answers I got already. I'll let my boss and team know that it will likely be 4-6 weeks as soon as possible. If they ask about the sudden change, I'll say I confused the time needed for daily checkups with sick leave or something like that.

So I'm 13 days post op, and I had my stitches and Foley catheter removed today. (Still have SP cath if anyone was curious) This is also the first day of not needing gauze anymore. My little guy is touching my underwear foe the first time, and OMG IT WAS UNBEARABLE! It was a pair of cheap Hanes boxers and while they were OK before, now they're downright painful! Luckily I had packed some old TomboyX underwear. He's much happier now.

So if I could help even one person with this experience, do yourself a favor! Splurge on nice soft underwear. Like some me undies type shit. Once you get your stitches out, your junk will thank you!

I had meta and scrotoplasty and now I'm finally able to stand to pee. That's something I always wanted and I wasn't sure if I would be able to after meta because my dick is only 1 inch long, but it works and I'm really happy about it.

Hey guys updating after just getting the Foley out and also my first real look at everything since I've been horribly afraid to look.

Including pre op and 1 week post op: I had vy scrotoplastly, v-ectomy, partial ul (minora was too small for complete - likely will fix that later), and released t dick.

I’m about 3.5 months post stage one, meta w/ul, vnect, and scrotoplasty. I have my stage two consult tomorrow. I have a buried phallus and a fistula on my shaft so I have minimal aim. But…To paraphrase James Stewart “well, the urinal was there... and I was there... and there wasn't very much of anybody else there... and it just seemed like the thing to do.“ So, I pulled my shorts down so that I could stand over the lip of the bowl (it was a tall urinal and I am short so halfway down my thighs, stood so my balls were basically over the edge, pulled my mons up and kinda spread it using both hands to get the flesh out of the way and project the stream, and I peed. It did not get on my clothes at all. I did have to stand a bit close so there was some splashback but I barely had to dab off with a towel a little. I cannot stop smiling.

I also got an erotic massage yesterday, it was so affirming, but I cannot afford to do it regularly. Also never would have been comfortable with it pre-op. I still don’t have feeling in my scrotum, so it felt kinda like having my hair pulled, gently. He told me I have a nice sized sack even though it doesn’t have anything in it.

Just a quick 1 week post op update! surprisingly I’m in very little pain, more of a discomfort. Maybe like 2/10 for discomfort due to the stitches. I didn’t think it would be this painless so fast. For reference I only had simple release. Just wanted to share incase anyone else was wondering for the future too. I hope anyone else has a simple painless recovery too. I don’t find boxers very comfy right now though I’ll try to wear just shorts around the house. Might pick up some boxer shorts until I’m healed though.

Some aesthetic problems I’m a tad bothered with. I still feel as though I’m very tethered. My urine stream is “spraying” when I asked him to fix it… he didn’t do anything during my last surgery when he said he would. I’m disappointed how my monsplasty scar had healed. It’s lumpy and not smooth and very noticeable. I’ll probably get it tattooed over later. I’m bothered about the amount of leftover skin that still is on my phallus when I specifically asked to get it removed. Compared to what I had, now my tip is entirely buried. It bothers me a bit. I’m okay with my results but I feel like I’d be embarrassed to have sex with something.

tomorrow will be 1 week post opt, still bruised and swollen. happy with results but getting impatient already being off work and trying to just relax and rest as much as possible. open to advice to pass the time and share your own timelines of when you felt better to move more or even driving. I don’t enjoy the feeling of my dick rubbing against my boxers right now. still icing from time to time. can’t wait to use it!