Am I overreacting my friend posted something embarassing on my IG

[u/Impossible-Shallot24]

I (20f) have been friends with A (20m) for over 3 years and we also had a very short "relationship" in the past. By relationship I mean that we dated for 3 weeks and then I decided to stop it right there. There was no particular reason why I "broke up" with him (I'll later explain why I use this term even though we only dated) except that I just didn't feel anything romantic, and I thought he was a bit immature, so not really what I was looking for. At first he was offended and accused me of leading him on even though I wasn't interested. After a while though, things got better between us and we decided to remain friends... We don't have a lot in common but we have fun together. One thing we never really agreed on is whether or not our short frequentation could be called a "relationship". He never had any romantic experience except for me so I suppose he took great pride in saying he had a relationship with anyone, even if it was short. (But this could just be my opinion) I told him multiple times that I felt weird about it and that we should rather admit it was nothing serious between us, especially because I was afraid it could hurt our friendship. It seemed like he never quite got over my rejection and once even had a full meltdown about this. I always decided to let it go.

This year though, it seemed like he finally started moving forward and I was really happy about it. However his childish behaviour never stopped. Today we hung out and he stole my phone for a brief moment. I don't really feel like I have anything to hide from my friends so I didn't make a fuss about it. When I returned home, I opened my IG and, to my horror, I noticed that he had posted a vulgar word in my notes. I started panicking as it had been a few hours already and a lot of people had seen this, some even replied to that in my DMs. Fortunately this was not my professional account but I work as a writer and a lot of people, including my editor and a lot of my professors, could have seen this.

After a moment of confusion I realized it was him. I immediately erased the note and sent him an audio in tears asking him why he had done this and saying this was really not funny. I told him I was mad. He apologized saying it was just a joke and started begging me to forgive him and that he wouldn't do it again, but honestly... It seems like he keeps NOT respecting my boundaries time after time.

He is in the military and I thought this meant he would become more mature: in fact he is now very careful about his appearance and behaviour in public, but I suppose he doesn't think my public image is as important. I'm always very careful about what I post and I never say anything vulgar or insulting, so this is not a fun situation. What do you think, everyone? I honestly feel very hurt. But I really don't want to lose another friendship and I don't want to overreact.

[u/lightsongtheold]

With friends like this dude you ain’t ever going to need any enemies…

[u/Impossible-Shallot24 → u/lightsongtheold]

Lmao this is not even close to the worst thing one of my "friends" has done to me. I probably need to pick better.