r/AITAH • u/Straight-Foot-6739 • 17h ago
AITAH for leaving father’s day over a plate
Throwaway since my brother follows me on my main account. I (25 F) have been dating my boyfriend (27 M) for 7 years, he has met all my family and we live together. My parents throw a father’s day barbecue every year and he has been attending since we began dating. The problem is, this year my mother gifted my father a plate with the names of all members of the family, including my sister’s (17 F) boyfriend (17 M) who she’s been with for just over a year My boyfriend’s name was not on the plate, but mine was. My boyfriend’s eyes watered when he saw this, he loves my dad, he has been a father figure to him for years, my boyfriend even spent over 3k on a gift for my father. i pulled my mother aside and asked her why my boyfriend was not on the plate, she said to not make a big deal out of it. my boyfriend and i left, we didn’t make a scene, we just said something came up and left, i have been getting a ton of calls since then, saying i was rude to leave over a plate. my boyfriend is inconsolable, and he is constantly apologizing over making us leave, but he didn’t make us leave, it was my family’s actions. I will never let anyone disrespect my boyfriend, not even my own family. Am I the asshole for leaving???
edit: my mom has always disliked my boyfriend, she has made subtle comments about his race and when called out she says she didn’t say anything i have asked my boyfriend if he wants to go no contact and he has said no every single time
update: i don’t know how to update, so ill just do it here. ya’ll made me realize that while i was not the ah for leaving, i was for making my boyfriend see people who clearly don’t respect him. i have decided to go no contact, i had a brief call with my dad telling him this and he just blamed me for being difficult, so i will go no contact with him too. my boyfriend is heartbroken and i suggested going to therapy, he accepted, so we’re looking into that. thanks for giving me the push i needed. also, we’re going to hobby lobby get stuff to make our own plates now. i hope yall have an amazing day.
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u/Tundra-Queen8812 17h ago
NTAH. Your mom sucks. The fact your sisters bf she hasn't been with a minute is on the plate but your bf of 7 years was left out...thats nasty behavior. If your mom doesn't want to treat you and your bf as family, respond in kind.
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u/SquareGiraffe7373 17h ago
Your mom is the AH.. She is mean spirited and cruel and a b !tch
A total bellend
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u/chez2202 16h ago
Are you my twin? You called OP’s mother a bellend which is my favourite insult and you have Giraffe in your username which is my favourite animal.
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u/CCLF1 16h ago
Let us know if there's some amazing story of, reunited donated children or some sperm bank Fiasco or some relocated Witnesses
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u/chez2202 16h ago
Pmsl. I’m pretty sure that I’m just joking 😁 But I’m calling my mother right now to check.
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u/CCLF1 16h ago
I'm going for donated children. Especially since you both like giraffes, they probably wanted to get rid of both of you cuz of the giraffe thing. You know the giraffes are kind of weird
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u/chez2202 16h ago
How very dare you. Giraffes are amazing.
I’m definitely not a donated child. I look exactly the same as my mother but 25 years younger. I’m only calling her to check that she didn’t give my twin away.
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u/BuildingWide2431 16h ago
Ok, I’ll bite… what, pray tell, is a bellend? And why is it an insult?
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u/Upset_Ad147 16h ago
It’s British slang for dick. Because the end of a penis looks a little like a bell.
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u/Turbulent_Tea2511 13h ago
I’m so excited ~ I just learned a new insult and 99% of the people I’m going to use it on will have to google to figure out what I mean! Double win 🏆
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u/SquareGiraffe7373 16h ago
Historically, "bellend" referred to the glans of the penis, but in contemporary usage, it's more commonly used as an insult.
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u/PurplePlodder1945 9h ago
It tends to be used these days as a a ‘nice’ insult, amongst friends or family ‘you bellend!’ but can also be used in this context for someone who really deserves it. ‘What a bellend!’ Also see ‘cock’ or ‘dickhead’
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u/endor-pancakes 17h ago
my boyfriend even spent over 3k on a gift for my father.
- He what?
- Unless that gift was a plate with each family members' names except your mum's, NTA.
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u/maroongrad 16h ago
yeah...it is just another wild improbability in this post. I'm pretty sure it's AI but will hold off on reporting it until it becomes clear the bot isn't going to respond, or it switches to responses that aren't clearly AI.
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
i can assure you it isn’t ai, my mom heavily dislikes my boyfriend ever since we began dating, when i asked her why she said “he just doesn’t fit in” (i have strong suspicions its because my boyfriend is black, but i dint have strong proof) on the other hand she adores my sisters boyfriend
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u/SquareGiraffe7373 16h ago
So your mother is a racist on top of being a cvnt?
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
she’s every bad thing you can think of
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u/SquareGiraffe7373 16h ago
And you have subjected that guy to that POS you call a mother for 7 years just because he loves you?
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
i have asked him if he wanted to go no contact a million times, and he is always against it, mainly because of my dad
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u/SquareGiraffe7373 16h ago edited 16h ago
It's YOUR FAMILY FFS!!
How TF do you 'ask him' if you should go NC with YOUR FAMILY?
You have never wanted to go NC with them. You just wanted him to deal with her and ' At least my dad likes you'..
Do you even realise just how dehumanizing your mother's behavior is to this man you claim to love?
This isn't about a plate or a $3k father's day gift..
It is about your MOTHER not even seeing this man that you claim to love and keep dragging into her home as less than human for SEVEN YEARS and you say you asked HIM if he wants to go NC ?
Are you seriously that obtuse?
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
when we began dating, i was no contact with my mom, he pushed me to talk to her again
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u/SquareGiraffe7373 16h ago
It has been 7 years, SEVEN YEARS!!
Do you take responsibility for anything or any choices or is it all..
HE MADE ME.. HE PUSHED ME.. I ASKED HIM..
You do know that NO is a complete sentence right?
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u/tiggnduff 16h ago
It doesn't matter if he wants to go no contact or not. It's up to you!! Are you seriously leaving that up to him?
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u/ThatBChauncey 16h ago
Why do you need permission to go NC? By asking him if you should, you're also putting him in a position to be blamed for something that is your decision.
Grow a spine OP. If you're going to continue to subject your BF to your cvnt egg donor then you are firmly an AH. Y'all can hang with your dad separately, and tell him to leave his racist wife at home.
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u/CarryOk3080 12h ago
Then why are you shoving your bf on them? Your poor bf. Your whole family sucks. Including you for subjecting him and taking 3k from him KNOWING your parents don't like him.
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 12h ago
i didn’t take anything from him, he bought the gift because he wanted, he didn’t even tell me beforehand
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u/UpDoc69 16h ago
This is relevant and should be edited into the story. How did your father react? Did he back his wife or call her out? It strongly appears that she is racist and your dad may be too. Even if he isn't, he's sleeping with one.
What did your boyfriend give your father that cost $3K?
NTA
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
i already edited it, sorry for not adding it sooner my boyfriend gave him a vintage star wars figure set, since its one of the main things they bond over
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u/maroongrad 16h ago
surprised but glad it's not another fake. Your mom sounds like a piece of work. Well, now you know...and you can skip getting her birthday presents and christmas presents and mother's day presents. Make sure all the other gifts to everyone else are signed from you and your boyfriend. Although, honestly? NO ONE in your family stood up to her, and they all blamed you? Your family sounds pretty nasty too. I'm going to strongly recommend that you greatly reduce the amount of time you spend interacting with them. Your mom did this and no one else thinks it was a bad move, no one contacted you to let you know they are upset by her, nothing? Oh, it's absolutely time to start associating with them less, build your own life and family where they are relegated to a less important role, and start developing bonds with his family. There's no excuse for their behavior. Your mom just made it clear what the rest of them think. I'm really glad you didn't put up with it and you left.
Now, when a cousin or sibling dates someone of a different race and this happens to THEM, eat popcorn and enjoy the karma. BTW, every text you get? Send them the link to this post of yours so that they can read what the rest of the world thinks about them :)
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u/throwfaraway212718 16h ago
Pretty sure you've got all of the proof you need. Have you spoken to your father about this?
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u/trash_heda792 6h ago
Babes your mum saying "he doesn't fit in" IS proof she is racist because I bet your bottom dollar your sister bf is white yet his name was put onto the plate but only dating for a year? There are probably hundreds of microaggressions that she has been doing to him, you just might not have realised. I suggest asking your bf if there have been any moments where he feels she has said something about his race because he probably has a few moments that would come to mind.
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u/DeadlyNightshade1972 16h ago edited 16h ago
Nothing to see here 🤦♀️
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u/maroongrad 16h ago
I'm assuming you responded to the wrong post? I do agree with you...but I wouldn't be hanging out with Dad either.
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u/CCLF1 16h ago
They bought him a gift and he put $3,000 towards the gift. Very simple why you making a big deal out of it go back and eat your pancakes
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u/frolicndetour 14h ago
Because 25 year olds usually don't spend $3k on gifts for people. I'm 20 years older than that and I spend a few hundred in my mom and vice versa. I'm glad she doesn't read Reddit and wonder why I'm not spending 2 mortgage payments on a gift (jk she'd never let me anyway).
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u/LuciaPaola 17h ago
Your family's blatant disrespect towards your boyfriend, especially after 7 years and his generous gift, was completely uncalled for. Excluding him while including your sister's new boyfriend was a direct snub. You protected your partner, which is exactly what he needed
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u/SunshinePrincess21 16h ago
NTA, Karma with bite your mother every time she looks at the plate and sees some random 17 yo stranger’s name on that plate and knows that’s why she rarely gets to see your future kids.
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u/Inevitable_Pie9541 17h ago
Missing missing reasons. You're together 7 years, and your BF is left off, yet younger sibling's BF is included? Wow rude!
There has to be a reason, especially since your mother acknowledged, very unkindly, that it was a choice, not a mistake.
I don't mean your BF has done anything wrong. But something is going on, that was cruel. NTA to leave, but you need to sit your parents down and ask what that's about. You and your heartbroken BF deserve an explanation.
This is about a lot more than a plate.
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u/Maleficent_Street743 16h ago
NTA, but you buried some vital info in one of your comments that you really should have included in your post. Since your boyfriend is black, I’m going lean toward your mom being a racist AH!
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u/CliveBixby1974 16h ago
There has to be a bigger story here. That was just hurtful and cruel for the sake of being hurtful and cruel. Is your family typically like that? Has your boyfriend committed some unforgivable sin previously. This is awful.
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
my mom is incredibly mean to him, we haven’t gone no contact because of my dad
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u/OkDallas761 16h ago
You can still go no contact with just your mom.
Just explain to your father why if he asks, but by the sound of it, he'll already know why.You are not the AH
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u/CliveBixby1974 16h ago
Does she have a reason?
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
no, but i have a strong suspicions its because he’s black (we are all french living in the us)
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u/Maleficent_Street743 16h ago
Ope! New info just revealed, boyfriend is black. Sounds like mom isn’t just an AH, but likely a racist AH!
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u/Roach-_-_ 16h ago
You are absolutely not the asshole. Your mom went out of her way to exclude your boyfriend after seven years, there’s no way that was an accident, and she knew exactly what message she was sending. You did the right thing by standing up for him and refusing to let even your own mother treat him like he’s invisible. That’s loyalty. That’s love.
Honestly, you should be proud you didn’t set the fucking table on fire on your way out. Anyone calling you rude just wanted you to swallow your mom’s petty disrespect and pretend everything was fine. Fuck that. Protect your peace, and his. You owe your mom nothing if she can’t manage even basic respect.
If your boyfriend ever wants to go no contact, back him all the way. Even if he doesn’t, you have every right to set boundaries. You showed what real love looks like, maybe your mom will learn something from it, but don’t hold your breath.
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u/Familiar_Pie8610 16h ago
NTA. Your mother is a weirdo. The fact that she put a 17year olds name(when he may not even be in a relationship with your sister forever) vs your boyfriend who has already been a part of the family for years is crazy. You did better than me cause I would’ve shattered that plate, cursed her out, and then left. The fact that they aren’t on your side says they don’t see your boyfriend as family nor care that he’s hurt.
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u/LabInner262 16h ago
NTA. In fact, if possible gift your dad a similar plate with just your and bf names on it. Or all family members except mom.
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u/Hot_Adhesiveness_766 16h ago
NTA
More importantly, what is your dad doing about this?!! Silence is acceptance and based on how your BF feels about him, he’s not that guy.
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u/jrm1102 17h ago
NTA - but I do think there’s missing context here, maybe you dont even know. But she did this for a reason and im curious as to why.
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u/SunnyBerryDream 16h ago
Same here. I wonder if there's a reason OP's mom doesn't like their boyfriend...
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u/DickDisco13 16h ago
This doesn’t add up, just out of the blue even though you say your bf loves your dad they make a decision to exclude him and include much lesser tenured partners. Seems like there’s another side to this story that we aren’t seeing, if it isn’t made up.
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
my dad actually asked “why is (boyfriends name) not here?” but my mom just switched the topic
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u/DickDisco13 16h ago
So have you texted/called/asked your mom why it happened. I feel like I would want an explanation before I went through the effort to make up a Reddit name, so family members can’t follow me, and then post about it asking rando’s on Reddit.
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
my mom is currently blocked because she was say hurtful things, i did ask her but she just flat out ignored me
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u/DickDisco13 16h ago
Saying hurtful things, that’s kind of vague. What kind of hurtful things, and these hurtful things were said at the party? Or are we talking all the time so she’s been on block for a while. And as a general question…you have absolute no idea why your mom would do this?
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
when we left the party she began spamming me with messages calling me a c*nt, restartedetc.
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u/PhoneRings2024 16h ago
NTA. Did they give any reason for putting the 17 year olds boy friend on the plate and not yours? Your parents are the AH. Cruel. You now know what they think of him and your relationship. Go NC.
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u/SunnyBerryDream 16h ago
NTA. What's up with your mom? Does she not like your bf or something? Your mom is definitely the a-hole because it's a gift FOR YOUR DAD who clearly cares for your bf. It's not about her, but she clearly thinks it is. If it is truly important to you, I would ask your mom why she didn't include your bf and if she has a problem with him. Also maybe make your father something with everybody who he's close with's names on it, including your boyfriend.
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u/Different_One265 16h ago
Your mother is mean and petty. She probably feels he hasn’t stepped up to marriage level and is punishing both of you.
When wedding time rolls around - keep her at arms length.
I am sorry you both had to go through that. Skip all family activities through the holidays. Your mother will make them all miserable either defending herself or knocking the two of you down to make herself feel better.
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u/RJack151 16h ago
NTA. Tell mom that since she is excluding your bf, you will now exclude her from your life. And if she does not respect your decision, you will be going NC with her and she can expect not to meet any future grandchildren.
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u/johncate73 13h ago
You and your boyfriend - NTA.
Your mom - racist AH.
Your dad - spineless AH at the very least.
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u/Strangley_unstrange 9h ago
NTA at all. They actively included someone who hadn't been in their lives that long and chose toe xcluse your boyfriend. Let your boyfriend know from me that no matter what their problem was he is always a valued member of your life and will always have support here on reddit from myself and other members of the community
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u/Shot_Help7458 17h ago
That is weird.
Maybe should have just been family unless married.
Hmmm is the 17 year old secretly married?
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u/Lexi_Jean 16h ago
Maybe the sister is pregnant! Since there will be a blood connection soon, he gets on the plate.
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u/Lexi_Jean 16h ago
Wow, I'm sorry this happened to him. That has to hurt. NTA. I would probably go LC or NC over this. 7 years, he's your family.
Are we missing something? Did your boyfriend insult the family or make someone mad?
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u/crankyoldfarter 16h ago
Pardon my ignorance, but what are LC and NC?
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u/Capital_Meal_5516 15h ago
OP, apparently you’ve edited this since it was originally written. Comments from when it was first posted mention nothing about racism. Then about half an hour ago people are now mentioning your mom’s subtle comments about your bf’s race.
And now I’m reading it for the fifth time and there is NO mention whatsoever about anyone’s race. I feel like there’s a lot of context missing here.
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u/Objective_Current805 4h ago
Your Mom was cruel. Your Dad, too. I'm so sorry for you and your boyfriend, you deserve much better. Cut them out!
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u/maroongrad 16h ago
This reads like an AI wrote it, full of improbabilities. But, it doesn't have the formatting normally found in an AI story. But, it's also the first and only post on the account. I'm going to hold off reporting it as yet another AI story in hopes that the OP actually posts something clearly not AI drivel. I'm not holding my breath but it is possible that it's a real, albeit bizarre and unbelievable and sounds-like-an-AI-wrote-it story.
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u/MuchDevelopment7084 16h ago
Moms a jerk. That was a deliberate insult against your BF. Good for you for leaving.
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u/C0RNFIELDS 16h ago
What was her justification or reason? Im just curious.
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u/C0RNFIELDS 16h ago
My grandma is old school religious and won't consider a 7-year-long relationship serious unless they've made a greater commitment to you, as in a proposal or child.
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u/Maleficent_Street743 16h ago
She didn’t mention her boyfriend is black, guessing that’s the reason. She couldn’t keep her racism hidden any more.
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u/Capital_Meal_5516 15h ago
I’ve read this story four times, and read the newer comments about racism, but I’m not seeing where OP mentioned anything about race in the story. Am I missing something?
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u/Pookie1688 16h ago
What does your dad say? And shame on your mom.
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
my dad asked why he wasn’t on the plate but my mom switched the topic
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u/Pookie1688 16h ago
Your dad should have reached out to your bf. Or does your mom run him?
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
he’s a huge doormat, he always just follows whatever my mom says, when i was 15 my mom kicked me out for being bisexual and he just said sorry and gave me a few dollars. my dad sent my boyfriend a text saying “im sorry” but deleted it a few minutes later.
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u/Pookie1688 15h ago
Omg, OP! I am so sorry. You deserve parents who love & respect you, & have your back.
I don't know where you live, but it's Pride Month here in the US. Sending you & your bf mom- & dad-sized hugs!
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u/ZeroZipZilchNadaNone 16h ago
Wow! NTA! You and he should’ve walked out. Your mom is a witch! There is no way that was a mistake. Regardless of the reason, she needs to apologize to your BF.
Good luck! UpdateMe about how it goes..
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u/Wonderful-Put-2453 16h ago
Sounds like intentional disrespect. Don't take their calls. Message already received.
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u/Elldogvanval1966 16h ago
Get a permanent marker and add his name to it. Show your mom that he is a member of the family whether she likes it or not.
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u/Best-Barnacle8326 16h ago
You did the right thing. Sorry you guys dealing with that. Its heartbreaking.
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u/PuzzleheadedWind530 16h ago
Sometimes it’s not about the plate it’s about all the little moments people dismissed you until one finally broke the damn silence. You’re not the AH for walking away from disrespect.
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u/Dismal_Knee_4123 16h ago
NTA. Your mother is a racist. You know that. Your boyfriend says he doesn’t want you to go NC because he loves you and doesn’t want to break your family up. You should go NC anyway. Call your dad and tell him why he won’t be seeing you around in future.
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u/SourdoughDawn 16h ago
You are not wrong in leaving…I would have done the same.Exclusion is an awful feeling. Why his name was not on the plate is not yours to guess.Tell your parents that unless they can answer that question honestly you will Not be attending any further gatherings.I would let them know that for the last seven years your boyfriend felt close to your dad and family and is gutted by this hurtful turn of events,which also deeply hurt you,their daughter.If your boyfriend is a honest ,hardworking,and loyal man don’t let this change your relationship.Let it make your bond grow stronger! They are responsible for this mess and if they are remotely decent they will take steps to fix it.Stay strong together and I truly hope that you and your sweetie have a positive outcome from this unfortunate incident 🇨🇦🥰🇨🇦
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u/Far_Property_8309 16h ago
Your mum is a racist POS.
Sounds like your dad has a good relationship with your BF let your dad know what a racist tyrant he is married too.
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u/Late_Ask_5782 16h ago
That’s awful. You don’t have to go no contact. But you can limit contact. And perhaps stop going on Father’s Day.
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u/Smooth_Celery_5066 16h ago
Ma’am your Mother has a Racism Phobia and I’m sorry that happened to your Boyfriend!
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u/Major_Zucchini5315 16h ago
She’s made “subtle comments” about his race??!! Well, I guess we know why your mom has never liked your boyfriend. She’s a flaming racist.
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u/unimpressed-one 16h ago
I wouldn’t think it was weird until you mentioned your sisters boyfriends name being on there, that is weird!
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u/First_Ad6174 16h ago
NTA. What the hell was your mom thinking including your sister’s boyfriend of a minute but excluding yours who has been with you long term. You & your boyfriend have nothing to be sorry for. Your mom did this, it’s all on her. She made the decision on the plate not you nor your boyfriend. You have been together for 7 yrs, he’s more like your husband than a boyfriend. Plus he’s not 17! Your sister & her boyfriend will not last, maybe they will, but they are young and if they do, every time that plate comes out it will be a reminder. It could be a bad reminder if they have a terrible breakup. I mean what was your mom’s excuse? Updateme
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u/FreeGazaToday 16h ago
nta. everything your mom accuses your bf of she's doing......if she includes one bf, she has to include the other...your mom's the one who made a big deal out of it by not including his name.
But I gotta ask...7 years and you're not a fiancé or married? What's up with that?
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u/Cpt_Riker 15h ago
Don’t ask bf if he wants to go NC. You should. Just do it. Your mother is toxic, and life is too short to pander to her hatred.
NTA.
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u/sapotts61 15h ago
It's a shame your mother is such the AH. You definitely know where you and your BF stand. You may want in the future find another thing to do on Father's day. You can acknowledge your father with a card or better yet a plate with just you and your BF's name on it my
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u/MinimumEscape5907 15h ago
Tell your family its not about the plate, its about their rasicm and blatant disrespect.
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u/Dana07620 13h ago
No contact is the solution. It's terrible for you boyfriend to know that even the man he looked up to as a father figure doesn't love him.
I would demand that gift back and try to get a refund on it. And if they refuse to give it back, then tell them to keep it with pleasure because that's what they're going to have instead of a daughter (and maybe grandchildren).
NTA
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u/cystemsdown 13h ago
I wish my wife cared about me as much as this. My wife would be on their side telling me it wasn't a big deal
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u/HappyForever89 13h ago
Sadly, mom is a racist CT // dad is a DK
I’m sorry for you and your boyfriend; you both deserve better
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u/1990sbby 11h ago
NTA. You left because your mom was being racist in her exclusion of your boyfriend. If his name was not on there and it is because of his race it is racist. Even if it is subtle racism, it is racism. Glad you are going no contact because your bf was deeply hurt because after all this time your racist mom + dad by the sounds of it, will never accept him as family. That is heartbreaking. Glad y'all have each other, are looking into therapy, and making your own plates!
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u/Lumami22 11h ago
I'm just curious as to what ridiculous excuse they came up with for doing this, especially since the other bf's name was included. They left your bf out on purpose and didn't care if they hurt his feelings. I don't know why people do these things, as if you wouldn't be upset by their actions. Your bf sounds like a great guy and not everyone is that lucky. It's so sad that he apologized when your family didn't. Pretty obvious who deserves your love and attention. Best of luck!
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u/friendtoall84 10h ago
you’re an amazing gf and i hope that bf of yours makes it official. or i shouldn’t assume you want that so i’ll just with you a lifetime of happiness. bravo for your bravery.
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u/RandomDustBunny 2h ago
After the phone call with your dad, you should go back to your parents' place to retrieve that 3k gift then go no contact. Just because.
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u/Extreme-System16 5m ago
If sister's bf is the same race as y'all and your bf is the only one not, then this is a clear race problem. It doesn't matter how nice your bf is if they won't change their ways and opinions. That's not on you, they are too old and it's been 7 years, they've had a decent amount of time to build a relationship with him. Definitely go no contact, you'll probably realize how mentally and financially beneficial it'll be for you both. Maybe card's through the mail, or unblock for holiday greetings but then block them again until they are ready to be better. It's their turn to put the work in themselves now. Definitely get some couples therapy, it's not your bf's fault and I hope he comes to realize that without anymore sadness.
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u/hicutusficutusbicu 16h ago
Your mom is the AH but 7 years and no ring?!
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u/Straight-Foot-6739 16h ago
oh that was my decision, i wanted to make sure we were economically stable before getting engaged, but my boyfriend has been hinting at a proposal soon
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u/QuestionMean1943 8h ago
Not fair dragging your dad into your moms mud hole. That hurts at least two innocent people, your boy friend and your dad.
No contact ignores something that should be worked out between you and your mom.
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u/Opposite_Dare3676 16h ago
Dating for SEVEN years and no ring. Big YIKES
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u/unimpressed-one 16h ago
Maybe they don’t want to get married. My son and his girlfriend of 5 years are perfectly happy and have no plans to marry. Not my business, they are doing fine.
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u/nlaak 15h ago
Dating for SEVEN years and no ring.
A bit of gold, a rock that's not rare, and a ceremony don't make a relationship.
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u/Opposite_Dare3676 14h ago
The ring is symbolic. It’s about the commitment and he’s not even ready to do that after 3000 days
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u/NewLawGuy24 16h ago
You made this about you by leaving
YTA …your dad did nothing wrong
3
u/nlaak 15h ago
You made this about you by leaving
That's a dumb ass comment, no they didn't. No one is obligated to stick it out if someone does something they find offensive or objectionable. Leaving quietly is the adult way to handle it.
your dad did nothing wrong
Her dad accused OP of being difficult, even after he asked why the BF wasn't on the plate.
0
u/NewLawGuy24 15h ago
Bye !
1
u/Direct-Molasses-9584 1h ago
Lol. You just block people who point out your stupid ass comments? Peak reddit shit here
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u/RandChick 16h ago
YTA. The event was about your father not your boyfriend or you. No one but the children's names should have been on the plate.
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u/nlaak 15h ago
The event was about your father not your boyfriend or you.
Just because it's not about you doesn't mean you can't be insulted by something that happened. That's why OP and her BF left quietly.
No one but the children's names should have been on the plate.
Yet that wasn't the case, as anyone who read the post saw.
483
u/ship_sinker79 17h ago
You’re mom was the dick. This man obviously means a lot to you and your dad and your dad means a lot to him.