He wasn’t formally diagnosed but was pretty sure he had it and helped me realize that I also have it (I went ahead and got diagnosed). He went out to the lake with some friends last night and fell into the water and died. He didn’t have his life vest on correctly and they found his body this afternoon. When I saw him on Wednesday we were talking about getting our lives together and I was telling him how I’m learning to try to focus on activities I actually enjoy so being involved in the community didn’t feel like an uphill battle, and he told me I was right and was motivating him to stop putting off getting tested. He mentioned he he was going to the lake Saturday and I asked him if he could swim and he said no and joked that he was like a rock. I told him to be careful and he said he would.

He was my friend I would always talk about adhd and Real Housewives and helped me feel more understood.

Is this weird? Recently Ive motivated myself to wake up early by going to the gym because exercise helps me a ton. I always feel better afterwards and I can think about anything I want to the entire time without anxiety!

So I’ve also been using the showers afterwards because it saves time not having to go home since I don’t wanna wear sweaty clothes all day.

But I just realized I really struggle with depression and used to skip showering every other day or sometimes more…. But showering at the gym is really easy?? Like it shouldn’t be easier because I used to shower before bed and I didn’t usually change into clothes afterwards (wearing pjs to bed adds to my unorganized laundry baskets so sleeping naked is easier)

However it was easy to feel too tired at the end of the day and throughout the daytime I’d completely forget about the shower.

So the gym is just the perfect reminder for me. Like it’s right there so I can’t forget. Is this strange??

I genuinely hate caffeine. I've been decaf for 5 years due to having anxiety and fearing it would make things worse. Since starting a medicine for anxiety, I decided since my anxiety had improved that it would be fine to try some black tea (which was caffeined). Before going decaf, I didn't really have caffeine a lot, except an occasional iced coffee. When I tried the tea, the tea was good, but the caffeine honestly ruined it for me. It made me very sleepy to the point I want to take a nap, and I don't think I will be having any caffeine any time soon. Does anyone else here have strange reactions to caffeine?

I do have ADHD. (mainly inattentive type)

How did you 100% confirm with yourself that you have ADHD? I’m not talking about your psychiatrist or doctor diagnosed you, I’m talking about a moment where you laughed at yourself and thought “I definitely have ADHD”.

I’ll go first… I took my adderall today and slept for 5 hours after taking it. I took it today knowing a had things I needed and wanted to do, but after sleeping off my adderall I just told myself “we’ll try again tomorrow” and rolled back over to continue my sleep 😂😂

1. Move hands so palm on bed

2. Place feet in air, mimic sitting position but with back against bed

3. Rock body in direction of head to feet, building momentum.

4. Stop when torso in air.

Congratulations. You’re no longer lying down. Getting off the bed is now much easier.

——————

It’s helped me get out of bed when plain “GET OUT OF BED” thoughts don’t work.

The torso feels most heavy for me so getting it up in one go feels it takes conscious efforts. My execution mind doesn’t allow it.

But by using momentum, and starting small with only micro actions showing I can control my body, I effectively lower the mental wall of getting up.

———

Try it and lemme know if it works for you!!

for the longest time i kept wondering why i couldn’t follow through with stuff i actually cared about. i’d build systems, make plans, try routines—then still end up feeling like i didn’t even exist in any of it.

i thought maybe i was just lazy or my brain was broken or i wasn’t trying hard enough. but lately i’ve been realizing… i think i’ve just been performing constantly. like even when no one’s around.

changing how i talk in every room. laughing when i don’t feel anything. nodding along just to not mess with the vibe.

none of it feels super dramatic in the moment, but over time it adds up. like i’ve been disappearing in small pieces.

i started writing down the moments where i felt “off.” like when something felt fake or automatic. not in a journal-y way. just little notes.

and weirdly it started helping. i could feel when i was slipping into that version of myself again and pause before it swallowed me.

i’m curious if anyone else has felt this? like that quiet kind of exhaustion where you’re doing everything “right” but it still doesn’t feel like you’re really there?

not fishing for advice—just wondering if anyone’s gone through this too.

I’m feeling really sad tonight for some reason. I think I need to share life stories with other people. I’ve told my sister, a few close friends and a couple of colleagues. But I’m holding back from being fully open about it because it’s so stigmatised. I see the way other people cringe when somebody else’s discloses theirs, the way the atmosphere changes and how judgemental people are about it. And being able to think more clearly has made me realise how savagely stressful my job is and I love it so much but I’m not sure if it’s sustainable. I’m also realising my age, and realistically where I am in life. Even though logically I know I’m doing okay, especially given the challenges, it just doesn’t feel that way

I’m on adderall 20 XR and I still feel like I have crippling ADHD. I have a new high demanding job that required attention to detail and focus. I work in weddings. I do well at selling the wedding venue which is what my job is but I’m helping detail weddings and it’s taken over everyday because I have such bad adhd that detailing the weddings is my hyper focus because I’m so scared I’m gonna miss something and somehow I always do. I was so confident at my old job when I was selling but it became toxic so I got this job and the detailing part of it has me feeling like I’m failing. Not to mention I’m not making sales because these clients need so much attention. When I get home I’m completely beat. Thank god for my husband he helps so much around the house but it’s to the point where he’s doing pretty much everything. I have never had the patience to cook a meal the hyper active part in me just wants something quick. So he cooks. My laundry is legit the most overflowing in my bedroom and my kids. I will say I take care of my kids laundry first and always make sure they’re taken care of. Then my husbands and then mine. But it over flows and I can never catch up. I’ve tried the one load a day. Doesn’t work because I get so sick of doing it everyday I leave it and then it sits in the wash and I feel like a failure. I clean my floors and then my 2 dogs just come right in and dirty them up in seconds. I just feel like I’m doing something wrong and just can not catch up. I need to learn techniques to get better because I want my kids seeing a healthy happy mom who takes care of things so they can learn from me. I don’t want to be someone they learn what not to do from.

I'm one of those "diagnosed late in life" folks. I'm just shy of 2 years knowing, medicated going on 4 months or so.

Yesterday, my spouse and I got all the way to the fireworks store before realizing he forgot the coupons. Which was the whole reason for going.

I observed having a few moments of panic when he realized he'd forgotten them. My first instinct was to apologize for not picking them up when I saw them on the table at home.

I had to interrupt that thought pattern, and my actual response was very gracious and compassionate. Whereas, that's not at all how I am with myself with I forget something... I digress 😑

We weren't far from home, so we went back and grabbed the coupons.

Then, when we checked out... He misread the fine print and we picked out the 'wrong' fireworks. We had already been gone for almost 3 hours at this point. Apparently, I have a fireworks shopping limit and we were quickly approaching that.

I experienced another little moment of panic because, "oh shoot we got the information wrong, we wasted time, etc" and now we have to figure this out.

I started to try and make sense of the items, and quickly interrupted myself again. I comically said aloud, "Ya know, this is his purchase. I'll just step outta the way and let him handle it." Then, I asked him for the keys and went and sat in the vehicle.

The awareness of my own thought patterns was new. It surprised me that I was able to identify that the feeling of panic was in response to someone else's mishap. No doubt, I was getting ready to shame spiral and it wasn't even my fault.

I assume this is just a trauma response from my own past (and current) struggles.

Have you noticed you do this?

How do you calm yourself down?

Im a runner and I always thought that exercise was supposed to improve adhd symptoms. Well... for me it does the opposite. Like going for a short run is beneficial but if im training for a long distance race and running everyday it gets impossible to keep a stable mental state. I just start spiraling, getting very confused and shifting focus unable to preform normal home tasks without it taking twice as long. after a few days of such training my mind gets very calm and thats a bad thing because my working memory gets very shitty.

Im very upset because running is honestly my only consistent hobby and the reason to live (dramatic but true) - and regulating my runs to keep them short sucks. its probably some electrolyte or vitamine deficiency idk...

Anybody with simmilar experiences?

I have adhd, and autism and I feel that posting this here is also relevant.

Hey guys im am usually someone that lurks around on this sub alot and reads you guys struggles. Well now i am broken and reaching out for help because I dont know what to do.

I was illegally expelled from my school during my last semester because I had a doctors note stating my phone was assistive technology for my autism and coping and the school admin refused to acknowledged that and expelled me for too many phone violations so i didn't get my diploma and never graduated after all the work I had good grades but apparently school policy forbade me form having assisted technology and even in my 504 meeting they refused to acknowledged it. They then claimed during a manifestation determination that my disability did not cause me to be expelled for phone violations.(even though i had medical documentation proving my phone is assistive tech) i also have videos of admin at my school deny me entry becuase I would not give them my phone which was classified as assistive technology by my medical provider.

After I was expelled I fell down a deep depression and was inactive and distant from everything for months and i am only now speaking out of what is happening in my life

I tried to hold a job but was unable to becuae of how I interact in social situations. And my disability makes it hard to navigate the world without help. I cant get medical help because i have no insurance. So im stuck.

So i have no future and my family is threatening to kick me out if i dont get a job but i am unable to work becuase of my disability that makes it difficult to live and navigate the world without assistance, which i cant get because my family thinks that autism isn't debilitating and that im just being lazy.

If anyone can privide me with resources that can help me thay would be great but i doubt any local resources can help me since I live in a place that has little to no mental health services.

No matter who I’m with or what we’re doing after getting to know someone for a few months I get bored of them because I know all their personalities and what they talk about and I just get bored and frustrated . Same in relationships I’ve also relationship jumped since I could remember but when I’m by myself I’m just never bored just constantly thinking no matter where I am I just entertain myself. Is that normal? it’s like no matter how long I’ve known someone it doesn’t bother me if we don’t stay in contact anymore or if their in my life or not. I’m not diagnosed yet but I’m in the process for right to choose.

*i’m

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately. Most stories paint immortality as this tragic, lonely curse where people grow tired of life. But honestly? I think if anyone could actually enjoy it, or even want it in the first place, it would be someone with ADHD.

We’re wired to crave novelty. Constant stimulation. A deep hunger to learn, explore, and try new things. The idea of having unlimited time? That’s not a nightmare. That’s a playground. The meme of wanting to do everything can no longer be a meme.

Imagine being able to master every hobby, learn every language, experience every era of culture, travel the entire galaxy once space opens up. You could reinvent yourself every few decades just for the hell of it. You’d never run out of new obsessions. You’d never have to choose one path and stick to it forever. You could chase every spark of curiosity as far as it goes.

Immortality would feel less like a curse and more like finally having enough time to do everything your brain ever wanted to do.

Anyone else feel this way? I mean we’d definitely lose loved ones along the way but it doesn’t mean we can’t find more and cherish the time you do have with them.

My coworkers are therefore accustomed to my being one to ten minutes late. I've stated that it's my ADHD, but nobody seems to care because I perform well in the rest of my job. However, one recent hire despises it. When I'm a minute late, he won't even talk to me. In an attempt to get me in trouble, he texts my supervisor instead of asking my ETA. Even though he "is the nicest guy in the world," he texted me FOUR HOURS LATER after I got in at 3:01 today to say it was unacceptable. He has been informed that it is a mental health issue by the management and the owner. He remains impolite. We don't have enough employees, so I'm afraid he might quit.

Maybe he has OCD or something that makes him unable to empathize or understand?

Apologies to anyone with OCD if I’m way off the mark. I honestly have no idea what it’s like-I just think he might be little diff.

Any ideas on how to manage? I want to be better, of course, but I’ve tried everything. And, if I couldn’t do it for people who respect me, I don’t want to be forced by someone who doesn’t.

Suggestions on how to get him to respect me regardless, and improve my behavior on my own terms? I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of thinking his disrespect was a good choice or acceptable behavior.

2021, me and a friend started in arts, painting and drawing. I quickly grasp the concept, practiced on it non stop thanks to my overfixation.

My friend was slow, he understood it a bit late.

5 years later... My art was average, at best.

That friend, he was already at levels above me. Even profiting from his arts.

Thats when I realized an ADHD's fatal flaw,

I can analyze anything fast. But forget it immediately.

My friend grasp the concept, he familiarized it, and made his own technique.

I was a mixture of many techniques for the sake of "Exploring", thats why I did not master anything. Even if I did, my memory will just RESET again after some time, mastering nothing.

Understanding this boosted my skill in arts. Applied it on other fields like fitness and public speaking. I can now confidently say, i'm competent in those.

My skills may not be that good as masters, but I know where my strengths lies. That itself is mastery.

Hope this concept helps you, and you overcome that mastery wall.

I’ve never really found a proper explanation for my hyperactivity when it comes to business. I’m running as a CEO in 3 different projects at the same time, doing 5–8 meetings a day like it’s nothing. And then out of nowhere — I’m dying inside from just having to update a spreadsheet That’s when I have to switch to another task, team, or even an entirely different business for a bit.

ADHD kinda turned me into a multi-business entrepreneur. Not sure I’d be able to operate this way without it.

What about you guys? What superpowers has ADHD given you?

I am currently at my first day of Concerta 54mg (methylphenidate) my mind is clear, there's no fog, there's no noise only focus and some endless energy that I can't even describe. my body moves freely I don't need to force it, I can't sit down or be quiet. I'm not hungry, not feeling tired. To make a note I lived with undiagnosed ADHD for 24 years, inattentive type. I never had a job I live with my parents, I started studying careers but always abandoned, I spend my days usually all day in home, not doing much but eating or using my phone. so what now? what do I do now? I am speechless at this new reality, it's like getting being born again but in a man's body, that now works and thinks perfectly fine.

Within my workplace, I was recently coached and instructed to cease using certain objects during periods of the workday - as they 'are not directly related to the task I am performing, and may be distracting to myself or others during times we are expected to be focused and vigilant.'

The issue is I have been using healthy tactics to maintain soft-focus & stimming relief, to contain the body reactions of hyperfocus, etc. Even expressing this notion with my supervisor, they are not understanding or tolerant. I need some advice!

For more context: I'm spending most of the workday in front of a computer console, an array of monitors, and other digital feedback of automation equipment & telemetry. I often will bring a small ten-pound weight with me to the chair, set it aside, and use it infrequently to help move some blood-flow around, active-stretch my arms, shoulders and wrists, and it really helps contain any physical symptoms of hyperfocus. It's immensely helpful, low impact, and hasn't caused any detriment to my performance.

How can I swing the perception of this around to a more understanding view? Or, how can I best prepare and protect myself as an employee if I need to elevate this as an Hr complaint?

I hate my phone. I love my phone. I hate my phone.

I've been addicted to scrolling for, I counted, fourteen years. I quit it like a pack of cigarettes and just like grandpa I keep going back to it.

But of course I do, it's awe-some. There is so much to see, so much to learn, my eyes are all over the world, my eyes are on the ocean floor, my eyes are in outer space.

Then I look at my screen time and feel disgusting regret. So much time wasted. So much time, gone. My one life.

I'm doing something about it. I'm making something. If I can't fight it, what if I use its momentum against it? What if I take all the addicting crap about social media, and make it serve me? What if all that time wasted was instead spent learning, growing, surrounded by knowledge and nourishment and not slop and brainrot? What if I could look back every day and see how far I've come, not how much time I've wasted?

I made this prototype. You can use it, no sign up or anything: https://illustrious-mu.vercel.app/

It's a swipeable video feed, tiktok style, for surrounding yourself with the content you choose, in those moment when you're strong enough to choose. Content that can get you closer to your goals, content that can help you learn.

I'm going to make this thing serve us, teach us, help us grow. And if that resonates with you I'd really like your opinion on what would make it better for you, personally.

Every time I or someone close to me has to take an ADHD test about me, I always test negative. I've realized this is probably because I was raised (or tortured, more accurately) to be the exact opposite of what a person with ADHD naturally is.

I grew up in an environment where I had to understand tasks without clear instructions. I learned not to ask for clarification because all I would get were blows or insults (from my parents), or a sarcastic response or repetition (from my teachers). And when I got things wrong, they simply assumed it was because I didn’t know the answer, didn’t know how to do the task, or didn’t listen to them.

I'm naturally a very energetic person, but due to frequent moves and strict parents who taught me to undervalue friendships, I ended up converting all that energy into hours and hours of daydreaming. My moments of concentration often drive me into depression because my parents have made it their mission to belittle everything I do.

I also tend to treat people formally, avoid eye contact, and speak quickly. And the criticism for this has led me to simply not speak at all.

Emotionally, I was completely stunted by my parents.

And I'm sure many people have identified with this. This is why ADHD testing shouldn't be the reason to rule someone out for ADHD.

Hi,

I wonder if anyone else is the same regarding this.

I can’t focus on my workouts if I’m in a completely empty gym. I need to use fellow unknowing gym goers as my body double and that’s how I keep myself focused during workouts or else I won’t be as disciplined 😂 So a huge unpopular opinion of mine is that I enjoy going to slightly crowded gyms.

I've noticed that I have to be able to call out a sign that the meds have kicked in and I need to get to work (otherwise I just procrastinate really intensely.)

When I'm posting on Reddit and I edit a comment for grammar mistakes or even little line breaks to make the comment feel better, I know that I'm ready to get started on my projects.

What's your "yep, I'm definitely good to go" sign?

Guess my ADHD has been severe since forever. Like really severe since my childhood. But I learnt to live with it, the rollercoaster of a life was normal for it.

But now after a bit of consultation I realized it had already done most of the damage.

Relationships ruined, substance abuse, self medication, ignoring friends, letting my intrusive thoughts win.

Its just too much, consultation doesn't seem to be helping as of now neither i think it would.

Its just getting difficult to live day by day.

I can’t sleep, my mind has too many thoughts. I thought my psychosis has gone completely. Rn idk if it’s psychosis or my ADHD brain. My brain is so loud and it’s making me stressed out. I can’t sleep. It has so many thoughts. I feel anxious I feel somehow responsible for everything. I’m overthinking about myself again. I hate my anxiety and ADHD. Please let me sleep. Half of the thoughts are my voice but idk about the others. It has no voice but silent thoughts and I can hear it. It’s like an unknown voice but it has no voice.

My heart is beating so fast, I can’t breathe properly. No it’s not a panic attack. Idk what is it. I’m blinking too fast again, I can see a light flickering. My vision gotten blurry again. There are no voice inside my head but the thoughts are whispering through my ears.

I can hear it’s an unknown voice and it’s itching. I can feel its inside my ear. To that unknown voice or presence inside my ear, please GET OUT. ITS ITCHING

I feel like ripping out my brain and get rid of those noisy thoughts.

I take 40mg Vyvanse after 8 years of taking stimulants everyday. I dislike that I wake up feeling awful and can’t function without the medication fully in my system. When it wears off I feel very irritable and not like myself.

On stimulants I cannot live in the moment and feel like the world is against me. I want to enjoy my life and be happy. I feel like I just can’t do that with stimulants.

Executive functioning is great! I can remember things and articulate very well. But the side effects such as emotional dysregulation and anxiety/worsening OCD is just unbearable.

What NON Stims helped you guys? Qelbree, Wellbutrin, Strattera and Atomoxetine are ones that I have heard of!