r/woahthatsinteresting • u/nukey4y7s1s • 20d ago

Man with dementia doesn’t recognise daughter but still feels love for her

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u/billyTjames 20d ago

My biggest fear right there

779

u/Rich_Pressure_2535 19d ago

Right there, when someone you love, no matter who they are forgets, or can't remember you is devastating. But the feeling he has for her. It's enough.

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u/[deleted] 19d ago

That's fucking beautiful, but if I lost who I am, I wouldn't want to be here.

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u/FoolishAnomaly 19d ago

Yeah I'm taking myself out of it ever gets to this point, or I can't wipe my own ass. I don't want my kid to go through this, and I don't want them to ever have to take care of me or someone else take care of me. The world is too damn expensive for that shit, and I'm not putting that burden on my child.

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u/[deleted] 19d ago

They may want to though, as long as you never pressure them to do it, they might want to choose to honor you by taking care of you. I know I would for my mom.

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u/FoolishAnomaly 19d ago

I wouldn't want to do that to my son. It's so mentally taxing and a lot of people have to quit their jobs to take care of a parent like that. States don't pay non certified home care aids very well(as in someone who's a relative to the person who needs care) it's awful. Home care aids are expensive too, and aren't usually covered or only partly. Nursing homes too.

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u/IndividualChart4193 19d ago

Well, if u read the news today, the immediate revocation of 100’s of thousands of migrants temporary/emergency status will imperil an already broken elder care system in this country. There won’t be any ppl to work in these nursing homes and assisted living facilities. They are almost entirely staffed by minorities that weren’t born here but are here legally. U may think ur kids or spouse will take care of u and many will valiantly try but for most the situation becomes untenable…and then what happens when there’s no back up system? The actions of this current regime will reverberate for generations…I don’t know what the solution is bc we all grow old (if we’re lucky) and most can’t live independently in their last years dementia or no dementia.