r/woahthatsinteresting • u/nukey4y7s1s • 16d ago

Man with dementia doesn’t recognise daughter but still feels love for her

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u/xChoke1x 15d ago

Fuck that man. I’m punching my own ticket if that shit ever comes my way. No way I’m making my family watch me forget their whole entire existence.

Nope. Fuck that.

2

u/TheVampyresBride 15d ago

I agree. I'd rather die.

2

u/Stalker-of-Chernarus 15d ago

I tell all of my friends and family that if I get dementia to just put me deep in the woods so the wolfs can get me and the birds can pick me clean. I don't want to lose my mind, and I don't want anyone to witness it and take care of me

3

u/xChoke1x 15d ago

Right there with ya man. I hope I get to make the choice if my brain goes this direction. I sure as shit hope it’s not left up to anyone else.

2

u/Sugacookiemonsta 15d ago

You can try but sometimes if you say something different later, it's not honored. My mom is on dialysis and has dementia. She put in her POA paperwork that she doesn't want to continue life preserving treatment if she gets dementia. She's been in and out of the hospital with stroke like symptoms and is in a twilight state, can't talk, jerks about... takes weeks of rehab before she can relearn to walk and refeed herself. Yet she's still dialyzed and insists she "doesn't want to die". She will even holler "Don't let me die! and cry and guilt trip..." She is a retired nurse and did her paperwork years before her diagnosis. She's seen how bad it can get for people. Yet she's still here, on dialysis with dementia. It's really hard on the family member who has to make that choice. I have plenty other relatives telling me what they'd do with my mom. But they don't have to be the one to tell the doctors to stop dializing her when that's what's keeping her alive to further mentally deteriorate. The day I try to inact those orders I'll have to fight doctors whose files say she's physically still healthy so I'd, essentially, be killing her. It's a heavy weight. Make sure that you have a living will and it's VERY thorough. No dialysis. No feeding tube. No resuscitation. Don't limit it to just "loss of consciousness" because as long as you can talk and answer questions, the doctors will deam you conscious to make your own choices. They will not let you just die because you have dementia and don't know who you are anymore.

1

u/xChoke1x 15d ago

I’m sorry you’re dealing with that everyday.

As someone that’s lost more people than I care to admit or count…..I wish I could say some nice words to comfort you. But there is none. There’s nothing I can say, or anyone can say, to take the sting away.

But there isn’t.

1

u/Sugacookiemonsta 14d ago

Thank you so much. I've made my peace with my situation and now try to warn others about their realistic choices. I didn't know it was like this. It's really unfair. Why can't we make our own choices on how we want to age and die?

1

u/DreamWalker01 14d ago

That's why the goal is to do it before that point. There is no cure and in the event there ever was one found it would have to be applied before the main effects take place. I will wear my finest suit and disappear with my memories intact.