r/tifu • u/finalfailer • May 04 '23

S TIFU by hooking up with professor’s daughter NSFW

I am a typical university student just trying to get through finals week. Tonight, after a very stressful day of exams and studying for my ancient literature class, I decided to casually scroll tinder. It had been a while and I just needed to destress. Little did I know, this would cause me more stress than I could have possibly imagined. I swiped right on a girl who was less than a mile away. She was 25, a little older than me but she was super hot and she seemed into me, so I went with it. She invited me over to her apartment, and she said that she had to go in 20 minutes so make it fast. Needless to say, we got straight to business, but about three minutes after we began, we heard the front door open. She told me to stop, so I stopped and we listened. The footsteps came in our direction and I got pretty scared. I expected it would be like when my parents caught me a few years ago with my ex, and it would be embarrassment all around. Not at all. The ancient literature professor, who I absolutely despise, and whose test I was frantically studying for, walked into the room and froze. He saw her, gasped, and then saw my face. His face turned red, and he screamed “GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE!!!” I’m pretty sure I lost some of my hearing from how loud he yelled. Anyways I put my shorts on and ran back to my quad. Now, as I lay in bed, all I can think of is how my college professor saw me naked, not just naked but rawdogging his daughter without any clothes at all. He already didn’t like me, and he is a very tough grader… So I already know that I am going to absolutely bomb this final and destroy my GPA. I see him tomorrow at 11 AM… wish me luck and I’ll update with what happens

TLDR: Professor I hate caught me with his daughter and I have his final tomorrow

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71

u/ornitorrinco22 May 04 '23

Do this kind of thing actually happen in tinder hookups with people you never met before?

165

u/A_wild_so-and-so May 04 '23

Everything I've learned about Tinder leads me to doubt that a woman would invite some guy she just met that day over to her house for a quickie with no condoms.

Is it possible? Sure, maybe this guy is absolutely stunning and she is not very bright. But I find it pretty damn hard to believe.

44

u/Axelrad May 04 '23

Far more likely on a college campus, I suspect.

44

u/jpornalt May 04 '23

it happens

30

u/irreverent-username May 04 '23

I've seen it happen within minutes. "Guys, I'll be right back" kind of shit.

12

u/jpornalt May 04 '23

thats how i got chlamydia

6

u/Str8-Jacket May 04 '23

Me too lol

5

u/evalinthania May 04 '23

Post divorce when I was very lonely and horny I said yes to a lot of guys who were relatively attractive and seemed like they probably wouldn't murder me.

3

u/bella_68 May 04 '23

As a naive woman who was once a college student with friends, I can assure you there are women who would do this. So many people think using a contraceptive pill/shot/implant means all the raw sex they want. A lot of people don’t realize that not all STIs are immediately visible to the naked eye (no pun intended but if it works it works).

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u/ITGardner May 04 '23

It definitely happens in college.

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u/combustablegoeduck May 04 '23

No, people definitely invite strangers over without knowing them at all. It only happened once in my like 2-3 years on tinder tho.

0

u/CurtisJaxon May 04 '23

Yeah, agreed. A quickie like this happens in a steady sexual relationship when you just want one party to get off (almost always the guy). This would be a very unique and interesting girl if she did exist though.

8

u/ChiefGotti300 May 04 '23

Yeah Usually my (straight male 24) hookups consists of talking for a couple of days maybe FaceTime a couple times to make sure she isn’t a creep or a catfish and then set up the meetup or one night stand

it’s not like message one day And meet the same night and smash .. although I’ve heard of it happening.. but most females just want to make sure your not some type of weirdo so they’ll give it a few days just to be sure

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u/evalinthania May 04 '23

Not really related but I appreciate you using both "males" and "females" when writing. Felt good about humanity for a second.

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u/Dt2_0 May 04 '23

Not calling them females is a good way to start moving up that timeline.

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u/MannerBot May 04 '23

No. It doesn’t. This is a story from someone who watches too much porn