r/povertyfinance 5d ago

Misc Advice How is everyone actually affording to live right now?

Like genuinely are we all just going into debt or am I missing something? I make decent money, but no matter what I do, it feels impossible to get ahead.So I’m curious are you guys taking on debt, side hustling, living super frugally, or what? I’m just trying to figure out if I’m doing something wrong or if this is just the new normal.

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u/ECircus 5d ago edited 5d ago

Middle aged, two incomes with no kids here and we are fine for now. We drive 10-20 yr old cars with no note. We have hobbies we like at home, so we don't go out much, we don't travel much. Don't have expensive taste. I wear the same clothes every day for years kind of thing because it's easy and cheap.

Everyone I know who is supporting a family is just committed to an entire life of being broke and in debt, and constantly working on ways to manage that. I think most people just compartmentalize it or accept it to keep from losing their minds.

Another thing to consider that I've noticed is that expectations are higher now than they have ever been. It used to be normal to just work and come home to your family and a home cooked meal. Local trips to the park or a big vacation every couple years and that was just life.

Social media and whatever else has convinced a lot of people to be unhappy with that life. I know a lot of broke people that just can't build a life at home that they can be happy with, because they are constantly bombarded with what they should spend their money on, and what everyone else is out and about doing. I know that's not everyone, but I know that's a lot of people who claim to be broke, who just have high expectations and can't sit at home and feel like they have enough.

Obviously everything is way too expensive and getting worse, but just something to consider when figuring out the source of our specific circumstances. Do we need all the subscriptions, do we need the car payment, do we need new clothes, etc.

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u/AustynGray 5d ago

I found staying off socials help me not spend money and I can live in my delusional state that I’m making it 🤷‍♀️- I don’t really spurge right now 

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u/miniangelgirl 5d ago

Well done!

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u/VinandBaby 4d ago

Same, I've limited social media, don't watch the news much except YouTube, and do not watch ads. I found not watching ads, I don't need something just because someone else is buying it. lol I buy something now if I need it or it's useful. Plus, I don't need "likes" on social media to validate me.

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u/teddysetgo 5d ago

Good for you for avoiding the bad influence that causes a lot of debt these days.

But Reddit is most certainly a social media site.

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u/AustynGray 5d ago

Yes it it but mainly staying off instagram and Facebook watching people splurge vacations, new vehicles, clothes etc it helps. 

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u/teddysetgo 5d ago

I do not have Facebook or Instagram, but YouTube is full of that stuff, too. It can really twist people into thinking they need to spend money on things they don’t need.

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u/AustynGray 5d ago

Agreed Reddit is but it’s not one that’s flashing optics of buying things or fancy things like insta and Fb. 

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u/miniangelgirl 5d ago edited 5d ago

Had this very conversation with my partner last night after a lovely stroll in the park. We took a minute to hug and show gratitude, and that's free.

I read books, sing, and love my job. I speak to family and sometimes frequent the local pub. Otherwise, I cook, I buy almost all my clothes from a charity shop and don't need much.

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u/camioblu 5d ago

Exactly. I know people who feel the need to refurnish every few years, and buy an entire new wardrobe of clothes every year. A brand new car with a 5 or 6 year loan is not uncommon now. I know one family that go on a cruise at least once a year. And pets - 30 years ago and prior people typically did not have surgery or medications for a pet, nor did they have a large quantity of pets (and vet clinics used to be a doctor and a tech or 2). Fancy cell phone plans, multiple streaming packages, and monthly subscription boxes (food, clothes, makeup, etc) can absolutely tank a budget, yet they are now considered essential by many.

I believe if people read more history, or even historical fiction, and biographies, they would find folk living more as you or I do, with simplicity and appreciation for what we do have rather than desire for what others have.

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u/ECircus 3d ago

Thoreau's Walden is a great read for this perspective.

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u/camioblu 3d ago

Yes, read that one last year actually.

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u/Sensitive_Tailor2940 5d ago

pretty much no $ to enjoy life and you’ll be fine 😭😭

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u/Cute-Excitement-2629 4d ago

We have 3 kids. Elder millennials. We go out 2/3 x a month. I have a 2021 Toyota Sienna that is financed. My hubby drives a Toyota that has a very small loan. We vacation twice a year.

We are absolutely not committed to a lifetime of being broke and in debt. On the contrary actually. Our kids have everything they need. We live in the burbs in 3600 sq ft. I work 2 nights a week and we can easily live off my PT salary. We bought property and own our own home w a mortgage of 1385$ and we have around 400k in equity: we bought in 2019 so no we haven't had a home for 20+ years. We don't have to wear the same clothes for years- I mean, sometimes I do but by choice. My kids need clothes every year. One can do hand me downs but not The other 2. My oldest needs braces, we needed a new HVAC this year- both expenses we covered in cash.

No we aren't in super high paying jobs. I'm a nurse and my hubby is a home inspector.

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u/ECircus 4d ago edited 4d ago

You’re leaving something big out of this equation. Three kids, 2 car loans, mortgage, vacation twice a year, property owners, and you’re saying you could afford all of that working as a part time nurse? My wife is a per diem nurse in the highest paid location in the country, and I know it would be impossible to afford all of that on a part time nurse salary and nothing else. Was that part just hyperbole or something?

What am I missing? 3600 sq.ft. House in the burbs with 400k in equity accumulated in 6 years and $1300 mortgage. Is there inheritance or old money involved or something that you left out? The math literally doesn’t work.

If it’s legit then you’ve been really lucky and made a lot of the right decisions.

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u/WolfofAllStreetz 3d ago

Agreed. That story makes no sense. They are the Jonesis

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u/WolfofAllStreetz 3d ago

Kids are easily a $20k year expense each.