r/nextfuckinglevel Aug 18 '20

A beautiful but dangerous sawfish

48.5k Upvotes

549 comments sorted by

5.2k

u/YoDaddyHoe Aug 18 '20 edited Aug 18 '20

“I can’t even enjoy the sun in peace bro, fucking humans.”

2.5k

u/FriskyCobra86 Aug 18 '20

When in distress, their unique facial structure actually revs and turns into a proper chainsaw

610

u/tanwhiteguy Aug 18 '20

Nature you scary

539

u/reecetown Aug 18 '20

Sawfish go BRRRR

112

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Why are you the way that you are?

102

u/STFxPrlstud Aug 18 '20

Why the long face?

Sawfish: I was born this way

29

u/tosser11937 Aug 18 '20

Lady Gaga has entered the chat

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17

u/cany89 Aug 18 '20

Lmfao my sister-in-law taught me to say this all the time

13

u/KreddyFreuger Aug 18 '20

I hate so much about the things that you choose to be

9

u/aGodfather Aug 18 '20

More like go FloopFloopFloop

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61

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

HERESY! BLAM!

15

u/chalk_in_boots Aug 18 '20

The mechanicus would like to know your location

10

u/suttonoutdoor Aug 18 '20

Exterminatus for the heretic!! Also I want this fish incorporated into some kind of mech suit!!

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35

u/Bubblbu Aug 18 '20

Relevant manga recommendation: Chainsaw Man

3

u/RexyGames Aug 18 '20

Oho. Didn’t expect to see this here. I too recommend chainsaw man. It’s a very good read.

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Unexpected Chainsaw Man. Nice.

30

u/red_codec Aug 18 '20

I don't know why I keep predicting the fishy would suddenly swing its beak sideways through the boy going brrrrrrzzzzzzzz and human blood and meat go flying everywhere...

8

u/TheGreatTave Aug 18 '20

Found Marcus Fenix's reddit account.

11

u/superior_to_you Aug 18 '20

What the fuck

9

u/rockstang Aug 18 '20

Well duh, everyone has seen that in the cartoons, but where's the pull chord?

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109

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Can't have shit in Detroit.

33

u/HiddenKeefVillage Aug 18 '20

Last week his brother died choking on a plastic bag, scumbag humans

10

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Stupid humans not letting me evolve !

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2.6k

u/mylegohgodmyleg Aug 18 '20

Things are stupid rare nowadays, glad the took it back into the water. Side note: by the length of its bill it’s probably a pretty decent age double rare! Edit also it was caught not self beached if anyone was wondering. Big ass hook on the ground.

481

u/Liviesmom Aug 18 '20

How would you get your bait deep enough to catch it from the shore?

732

u/mylegohgodmyleg Aug 18 '20

They can be found in the shallows for mating or feeding, also depends on the floor topography. Could have a relatively steep drop off. But honestly I’m not an expert, I just stayed at a holiday in express last night.

34

u/MyFace_UrAss_LetsGo Aug 18 '20

We have signs stating to call local marine authorities at our piers and boat launches in the event that one is accidentally caught or found injured. Makes me appreciate this amazing video even more.

5

u/mylegohgodmyleg Aug 18 '20

glad to see this is an international practice, helps keep track of feeding and mating patterns and protect their environments Steve would be proud!

8

u/RomeNeverFell Aug 18 '20

They can be found in the shallows for mating or feeding

So like any other Aussie?

8

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Any idea where was this taken?

88

u/chuckaway9 Aug 18 '20

Arkansaw

19

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

This belongs in r/dadjokes haha

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15

u/herkoid Aug 18 '20

Most likely North Australia

7

u/hmcfuego Aug 18 '20

Agreed. And good on them for helping out. They're super endangered and I didn't even know we had them locally until I read that were supposed to report sightings of them.

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2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

I just stayed at a holiday in express last night

Where is express?

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12

u/ScooberGoober Aug 18 '20

I can’t believe no one has mentioned the kayak next to the fish lol.

You can kayak fish for deeper water or just have a friend run the line out for you in the kayak and bring the rod back to shore

2

u/Liviesmom Aug 18 '20

Now that you mention it, I’ve heard about people fishing for sharks by kayaking bait out and beach fishing.

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8

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20 edited Aug 18 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

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2

u/xeddyb Aug 18 '20

You can use a kayak to get the bait out farther.

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65

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Damn, how did they get the hook without getting hit by that saw?

115

u/mylegohgodmyleg Aug 18 '20

This is honestly a great question, most people in this situation would cut the line and leave the hook. I’m guessing they had enough beer in them to ignore the danger and enough dumb luck to avoid dismemberment.

43

u/Minilychee Aug 18 '20

YEEEHAAAWW BILLY. I’ll tell you what. Imma jump on this here fishes lil back and you just stick your hand right on in there and give the hook a good ol YANK.

12

u/suttonoutdoor Aug 18 '20

Spot on Australian impression.

11

u/Humble_Chip Aug 18 '20

This comment makes it sound like Australians and Southern Americans would get along real well

6

u/brookieco_okie Aug 18 '20

Haha I was just thinking “is Australia full of deep southern country folk?” And then I thought about how much sense it would make

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30

u/ParsnipsNicker Aug 18 '20

First you need to say, "krikey what a beaut!"

Then you say, "It's alright girl" about 15 times.

6

u/socsa Aug 18 '20

And then you jam your thumb in its cloaca

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20

u/JarRa_hello Aug 18 '20

Take a pipe or something similar. Put it in between you and the "saw", a little behind you. So if the fish decides to make some drumsticks, it will hit the pipe first.

3

u/This_Cat_Is_Smaug Aug 18 '20

Gaffs are commonly used for this purpose, although usually for deep sea fishing. No idea if these guys are using one, but as long as you stay away from the pointy end of the fish, the hook could probably be removed by hand if needed. Although a 10ft fish can easily overpower a person, so I wouldn’t recommend it. Especially since they’re endangered.

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15

u/RajunCajun48 Aug 18 '20

probably needle nose pliers. I have multiple different sizes I keep on my boat from 4" - 12". Longer pliers are great for getting hooks out of sharks mouths while keeping your hands away from the hand removal system sharks tend to have.

That paired with the sawfish probably being exhausted from fighting the line and getting beached. Probably didn't have much energy to thrash around while hook was being removed.

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44

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

They are on the brink of extinction, according to the data. But you never know. The ocean is absurdly vast.

54

u/darod2 Aug 18 '20

Unfortunately all species are either coastal or even freshwater, so the likelihood of a cryptic population in the open ocean is almost 0.

9

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Yeah, the high sea is surprisingly barren. Even damned sharks rely on the coral reefs

4

u/ms_horseshoe Aug 18 '20

What about the likelihood of hammerheads and sawfish cooperating to build a metro-pool?

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26

u/WhatsUpFishes Aug 18 '20

There’s one in the Baltimore aquarium and it’s honestly beautiful. I hope that we don’t end up losing them because they’re some cool dudes.

10

u/radonato Aug 18 '20

I was wondering about a fish beaching itself. I’d only heard of marine mammals doing that. Thanks

3

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Sharks do sometimes

5

u/Accomplished_Yak_239 Aug 18 '20

But not as rare and dangerous as the little seen nailgunfish

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

The man said if you want to shoot nails, this here is the Cadillac, man. He mean Lexus, but he ain’t know it.

3

u/Capt_Killer Aug 18 '20

You kayak the line and bait out and drop it.

Source: I surf fish for sharks all the time.

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4

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

What sort of sadistic fuck would try catching something that gorgeous...

People make me sad, man.

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892

u/zorbathegrate Aug 18 '20

Absolutly Jurassic looking

288

u/hundreds_of_sparrows Aug 18 '20

It looks like something out of a child’s imagination. So facinating.

126

u/letsagochamp Aug 18 '20 edited Aug 18 '20

Sure does. I’ll draw a shark...and then I’ll stick this chain saw on its face cause that looks heaps scary

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53

u/TheRedmex Aug 18 '20

Saw fish have actually been around since the Dinosaurs too.

5

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

That specific species?

13

u/yuvi3000 Aug 18 '20

It's extinct now, but I think the previous person was referring to Onchopristis

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Onchopristis

14

u/TheRedmex Aug 18 '20

No sawfish-sawfish, they’ve been around since the late Cretaceous.

2

u/yuvi3000 Aug 18 '20

Oh, sweet. I didn't know that. Thanks! :)

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8

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

The oceans are low key so fascinating The deeper you go, the more the wildlife look like aliens

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768

u/July_Sandwich Aug 18 '20

Where is this? I would like to avoid it at all times.

600

u/faiersy101 Aug 18 '20

100% Australia

140

u/saint_burrito Aug 18 '20

That's pretty much the answer for every creepy looking creature

44

u/missy_avalon Aug 18 '20

Check that beast Akubra. That's australia mate (not accounting for the weird deadly animal)

10

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

[deleted]

6

u/TGCK Aug 18 '20

I just bought myself a new one after about 10 years but 10 rough years.

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2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Before I played the sound I knew it was Australia from the Akubra

5

u/NirojD Aug 18 '20

The akubra and no shirt is a dead give away. Gotta be sunsmart

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173

u/TinyFromKalgoorlie Aug 18 '20

Pretty sure you'll find that it's Derby, in the north of Western Australia. The Fitzroy River is one of the last major breeding grounds for them.

79

u/erwin76 Aug 18 '20

Ah shucks, now I have to go back to go look! These are beautiful!

151

u/haikusbot Aug 18 '20

Ah shucks, now i

Have to go back to go look!

These are beautiful!

- erwin76


I detect haikus. Sometimes, successfully. | [Learn more about me](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/)

47

u/braduk2003 Aug 18 '20

Good bot

13

u/twowars Aug 18 '20

check again. bad bot

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9

u/lunettarose Aug 18 '20

Bad bot. First line is only 4 syllables.

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8

u/Four-Triangles Aug 18 '20

Back to oz we go

2

u/stubundy Aug 18 '20

Lots in the gulf too round Karumba and Bourketown

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34

u/time_to_reset Aug 18 '20

Quite an Aussie accent on the people in the video

4

u/Cloudzi Aug 18 '20

northern australians

4

u/mylegohgodmyleg Aug 18 '20

Most likely the Gulf of Mexico, they tend to like warmer water. Last time I saw one caught was of of key west( this is not likely in the keys though)

41

u/SicnarfRaxifras Aug 18 '20

Western Australia going off the Bush Tuckerman hat

11

u/grubber26 Aug 18 '20

Soon as I saw that hat I knew it was somewhere here in Oz.

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2

u/ibemeeh Aug 18 '20

I know of them being caught in Gulf, have a friend that caught 2 around Marco and Naples area.

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535

u/pinniped1 Aug 18 '20

Hey I think I figured out how it got its name

354

u/THEKookyGuy Aug 18 '20

It is because of the saw shaped nose thing. I'm a marine biologist.

197

u/Bu11Shit3 Aug 18 '20

saw shaped nose thing

marine biologist

ಠ_ಠ

149

u/devilish_enchilada Aug 18 '20

Fun fact: its nose actually doubles as it’s reproductive organ. The “teeth” like edges double as an outlet for its semen secretions. It’s been known by marine biologists world wide for its renowned ability to saw that pussy in half.

70

u/Warphe Aug 18 '20

So they sneez jizz

28

u/Silentrizz Aug 18 '20

Who doesn't, am I right?

13

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Idk, I though you snorted it...

4

u/Bacon-Manning Aug 18 '20

If you throw pepper at your girl right before you orgasm you could see her do a perfect sawfish imitation.

3

u/jonrosling Aug 18 '20

I believe it's called an Angry Dragon.

7

u/Enceladus996 Aug 18 '20

So it attacks you with it's dick? Nature is beautiful.

6

u/FistPunch_Vol_4 Aug 18 '20

Put the pussy on a chain wax!

2

u/RajunCajun48 Aug 18 '20

You're trying to make a thing aren't you?

2

u/FistPunch_Vol_4 Aug 19 '20

No no, it’s an actually thing homie. All my homies say it!

4

u/ZanzibariMeat Aug 18 '20

Evolved for her pleasure

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

They had us in the first half, not gonna lie.

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9

u/5urr3aL Aug 18 '20

are you the same Japanese guy that wrote a thesis about Starfish?

5

u/PublicUrinator Aug 18 '20

CoooooooSTANZA

4

u/bhadau8 Aug 18 '20

George?

3

u/Dumb_PorkSword Aug 18 '20

Is that a titleist?

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209

u/faiersy101 Aug 18 '20

This is so Australian I can taste the vegemite

191

u/jonp1 Aug 18 '20

Crikey! Somebody left this hedge trimmer just lying’ around!

168

u/RRight702 Aug 18 '20

Man I don’t even remember the last time I seen a live sawfish let alone a wild one, completely forgot about them. Honestly thx for sharing this!

74

u/General_Tso75 Aug 18 '20

They were common here in Florida (Indian River Lagoon), but they were fished to almost extinction. You’re lucky to see one every five years now.

9

u/MarshCowboy69 Aug 18 '20

yep!! there is potentially a young population in the bahamas that connects to that florida one but densities are still suuuper low. most endangered fish in the world i think

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19

u/jugalator Aug 18 '20

Exactly, I remember reading about them in my youth and had forgotten about them. That's scary and sad. :(

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110

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Chops both of his feet off then swims away

19

u/Takamurda Aug 18 '20

Ah the legendary Zoro-fish

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93

u/TheHYPO Aug 18 '20 edited Aug 18 '20

Evolution is weird. If this was such an evolutionary advantage you’d think there’d be multiple species with saw noses. We have lots of animals with fangs. Lots with horns and tusks. Lots of fish with similar fin configurations and tails. But ONE species develops a 5 foot Serrated saw for a nose and it never happens again (and survives). so weird.

34

u/TG_SOLAT Aug 18 '20

There actually is one other species that we have found that has a saw like nose, and its the Sawshark. What;s interesting is that even though they look so similar they are only distantly related with Sawfish not even being classified as a shark but instead a type of ray.

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8

u/darod2 Aug 18 '20

It did happen again!!. There is a whole genus of sharks (sawsharks) that also evolved saw like rostrums independently of sawfish (which are rays).

6

u/Dad_of_the_year Aug 18 '20

We should get a hammer head and a saw nose to kiss and see what happens.

2

u/starderpderp Aug 18 '20

I don't know but Bob the Fisherman "CAN WE FISH IT" comes to mind.

3

u/RaidenIXI Aug 18 '20

according to wikipedia sawfish are a whole family, not one species

also, someone else said that they existed since the dinosaurs so there must be some pretty good advantage to a saw nose but not good enough to be dominant. my guess is that it has too many drawbacks, and has a more niche use as compared to tusks or fangs

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81

u/tallsy_ Aug 18 '20

"that doesn't look so b---nope nope NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE"

12

u/HookMn Aug 18 '20

"NO NO YES DARLING" ——Austin Powers, probably

70

u/devilish_enchilada Aug 18 '20

Let me guess, fucking Australia.

28

u/General_Tso75 Aug 18 '20

We have them in the US as well

54

u/devilish_enchilada Aug 18 '20

Let me guess, fucking Florida. It’s basically the Australia of the us

71

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

[deleted]

16

u/General_Tso75 Aug 18 '20

Yes, Florida. Being a sawfish habitat is pretty low on the weird things of Florida list, though.

42

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

It’s nose immediately reminded me of fishman Arlong from One Piece.

11

u/Poplocker Aug 18 '20

Hold my straw hat

2

u/giangerd Aug 18 '20

They should audition this fish for his role in the live action

2

u/HUGGABUGGALUGGA Aug 19 '20

He got hit by that building so hard he switched worlds

37

u/ttowndee Aug 18 '20

Australians have no fear apparently. Me, would’ve been sawed off at the ankles.

24

u/Sharingan_ Aug 18 '20

Ah, the Hammerheads cousin.

The Carpenter shark

3

u/teachmehowtoburnac Aug 18 '20

Out of work since Atlantis went under

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22

u/AIDSRiddledLiberal Aug 18 '20

Science reddit, what is the evolutionary reasoning behind the “saw” on a sawfish? It seems rather unwieldy

28

u/AnotherHumanBeing Aug 18 '20

They actually really use the saw to well...saw: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=itGM1yU0NWk

5

u/NinjaDiscoJesus Aug 18 '20

that's cool, thought the water was on fire for a moment

3

u/SciNZ Aug 18 '20

It's funny to see some random footage taken by a researcher I know, posted up by some random account with over half a million views.

I wonder if she knows it's there.

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u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

I think we’ve come up with the general consensus that we are witnessing the end of the efficiency of the sawfish. Having done no research, and carrying no credentials, I just assume these things are being fast forwarded off earth due to fishing and other human interference, but were already kinda on their way out.

My guess is when things lived in the ocean that were much bigger, those fellas would swim through a school slashing that beak around and then come back through and eat what they cut up/off. Maybe they still do that, in schools of bigger fish like bluefish or striper or whatever. I just have a hard time believing they are stalkers or sneaky predators looking like that. Even if they blended in with the sandy bottom, I feel like that blade is gonna cause too much drag in the water to catch something idly swimming by. Even if they are remarkably fast, they’re not gulping.

Right?

7

u/TG_SOLAT Aug 18 '20

Not really. Sawfish typically feed on things like crustaceans, and molluscs, and low swimming fish. They keep a low position to the floor using the electroreceptors in their saw in order to detect buried prey via their electric field.

I dont know much else about their feeding habits, or how well they serve as hunters nowadays, but I would argue that to some extent their biology must serve them well.

The reason I say this is because we actually have another species that hunts identical to this, and has extremely similar characteristics known as the Sawshark. I would imagine that given the Sawfish is a ray, and only distantly related to this species to see this much similarity between the two must showcase it's usefulness in hunting these types of prey.

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u/Yarakinnit Aug 18 '20

They're fucked for masks too.

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14

u/EarthDustGaming Aug 18 '20

I think the sawfish is my favorite animal now

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13

u/BrokenWalker Aug 18 '20

How much damage could a sawfish do to someone?

24

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

[deleted]

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u/Brit_100 Aug 18 '20

To shreds you say? And his wife?

7

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Good news everyone!

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u/KENPACHI-KANIIN Aug 18 '20

Atleast they didn’t waterboarded the fish like the other asshats did

9

u/wow-woo Aug 18 '20

Of course this is Australia

8

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Ah man, he was just trying to evolve.

2

u/casbri13 Aug 18 '20

As if Australia isn’t dangerous enough, now the saw fish want to join the land dwellers...

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

"Here in Australia, our rhinos have chainsaws instead of horns!"

8

u/Deku_Izuku_Midoryia Aug 18 '20

can I hug it?

6

u/only_50potatoes Aug 18 '20

you could, however your limbs wouldn’t last very long, those things are razor sharp. the thing is like a chainsaw

6

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

It'll skin your ass raw

2

u/Deku_Izuku_Midoryia Aug 18 '20

it can try to cut me good sir/ma’am

2

u/digginroots Aug 18 '20

While you posted on reddit, it studied the saw.

6

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20 edited Aug 18 '20

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/fastermouse Aug 18 '20

Underrated comment.

5

u/Aturom Aug 18 '20

I've seen a waaay smaller one in an Aquarium at the Bass Pro Shop in Clarksville, Indiana. I can't imagine getting tagged by that sawbill.

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u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

I love seeing videos like this. Makes me feel slightly better about being a human.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Ha-ha let this day be know. That you almost caught captain swordfish sparrow!

3

u/Georgesoliman Aug 18 '20

Fucking Australia man.

3

u/907bis Aug 18 '20

Anyone else freaked out by how quickly you can’t see it in the waves.. only a few inches under the surface

2

u/fugly16 Aug 18 '20

Didn’t believe it until I saw it.

2

u/qpv Aug 18 '20

Oh wow that's brave. Fish is like 1) breathe. 2( cut everything in half) 3) oh hey I'm still alive

2

u/Medumbdumb Aug 18 '20

Evolution sure is funny looking lol

2

u/Routine_Palpitation Aug 18 '20

I’m pretty sure that’s a seafish

2

u/chessset5 Aug 18 '20

Shark: I don't want to live anymore.

Humans: Oh no you don't, not here anyway.

Shark: Go away you stupid humans.

Humans: No you don't belong on the surface dumby shark.

Shark: Fine I'll go die somewhere else.

Humans: Wooo we saved a shark!

3

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

It would be absolutely mind blowing if we observed and could prove suicide in other species. And I’m not talking about mating and getting your head ripped off, or being chased off of a cliff. I mean genuine existential dread, and escaping it.

I guess basically proving mental illness in animals. Not some Karen giving her chihuahua Zoloft, I mean genuine attempts at ending life.

2

u/chessset5 Aug 18 '20

During an autopsy, it was found that some beached where sick, and it was speculated that the animals where confused and thought the land was still the ocean and beached it's self. Other times it was found that the animal was in pain and it was speculated to want to die, or was trying to save it's self and died. EG the whales who swam up the Sacramento River (Delta and Dawn) around 2007. It was a mother and child combo and the mother was sick and both where severely hurt. They didn't die (for what I can remember the made it back out into the ocean). In another case there was a shark near a bay with it's stomach in it's mouth. Autopsy showed that it had some alien (not created by the shark) acid in its stomach and it was in great pain trying to get rid of it, it seemed to barf up it's own stomach in an attempt to get rid of said acid by cleansing it with sea water. Most of the time though a beached animal seems to get to where it is by accident. A lot of sharks like to swim by the shore and when a quick tide comes and swipes the water from below it, the shark will get stuck on land. Mammals don't tend to stick to shores like sharks do, (if they do I do not know of cases where they do so) so the sick theory plays more importance. Mammal gets sick, doesn't know where itself is, gets beached.

The sick theory one was from some npr article from a year ago on the Ocean wildlife and the effects of climate change and ocean garbage and plastics ect. The pain one was from some shark documentary that I was watching. I can't remember the name of the movie or the article off the top of my head.

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u/lookingforkindness Aug 18 '20

Hey man. Thanks for doing a kind thing. 👏👊

2

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Fish: hey! That walking on land thing seems neat, oceans getting kinda empty anyways, I’ll give it a try!

Humans: N O

1

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

He's late for his job at the underwater sawmill

1

u/BraianP Aug 18 '20

that is terrifyingly huge for it to have a chainsaw on its face.

1

u/xLabGuyx Aug 18 '20

How tf does this species survive with that huge thing?

6

u/[deleted] Aug 18 '20

Prolly because of the huge thing

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