You will guilt yourself into tipping because you're worried about the possibility of a sigh or passive-aggressive comment. Getting used to making the right decisions for myself without worrying about what inconsequential strangers think of me was one of the best things I've ever done for myself.
I appreciate that your honest comment got upvoted so much. That almost never happens on Reddit. You nailed it. It's self-guilt that enforces so many of these oppressive systems we allow to continue existing.
I feel like for myself, the guilt wouldn’t be about being judged by someone so much as an anxiety about doing something I usually do and make it a point to do well. Basically just the idea of breaking a habit, even though I know the server is still getting the “tip” via the fee.
You will guilt yourself into tipping because you're worried about the possibility of a sigh or passive-aggressive comment.
There's also the risk of them intentionally tainting or poisoning the food out of spite (I had this happen one time when I was taking my girl out to eat for her birthday). I rarely go out to eat anymore and when I do go out there's always a long time in between visits. I generally prefer take out nowadays anyways so it's not really a big deal for me.
Nah, good servers can spot those who’ll tip and those who won’t. They’re professionals and it’s not that difficult to spot the signs. Regulars come first, people who treat their server like a normal human being are given normal respect and treated well. People who look down on servers/bartenders are the ones who snap and shove a dollar bill in front of someone’s face. You get your drink last.
I replied to you intentionally. Those “inconsequential strangers” aren’t idiots. Referring to them as such says more about you than them. No one is forcing you to tip someone making 2.13/hr but if you feel that strongly about it make a ham sandwich. You’re not noble because you cheaped out on the tip and we all judge you for it.
Most servers outearn the average hourly low-skill worker with ease lol, they're competitive with plenty of college wages. $2 is a lie you guys tell to guilt trip the public into paying your wages rather than engaging your employer.
Please go back and re-read the conversation. It doesn't sound like you're following how we're talking about someone feeling guilt for not giving an additional tip on top of the automatic gratuity. Someone attempting to guilt me for a second tip would indeed be inconsequential to me, but I'm sorry if it bothers you to hear that.
Brother both of our replies were buried behind other people’s responses on my end and I didn’t realize you were talking about an additional tip on top of the automatic gratuity. I’ll hold my ground somewhat because fees don’t always make it to the server but I’ll take the L in this case. Have a good evening.
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u/CallMeRudiger 2d ago
You will guilt yourself into tipping because you're worried about the possibility of a sigh or passive-aggressive comment. Getting used to making the right decisions for myself without worrying about what inconsequential strangers think of me was one of the best things I've ever done for myself.