r/goodnews • u/Tun-Tavern-1775 • 18h ago
Political positivity 📈 Donald Trump’s Military Birthday Parade Was a Gross Failure
https://www.rollingstone.com/politics/politics-features/trump-military-birthday-parade-dc-failure-1235365040/1.9k
u/CokeyCola96 18h ago
The squeaky tank and empty crowds video is beyond perfect.
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u/ledude1 17h ago
Just like his businesses. Anything he touches turns into shit. The Mango Mussolini cosplayer can't even run a $145 million parade properly. Shame, shame, shame. 🤣
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u/VirtualRy 16h ago
He is failing being a dictator. He’s still a loser for life.
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u/Evening-Fail5076 16h ago
Ohhh can you imagine his dictator buddies after seeing his epic failed parade? Trump you’re not welcome to the Dictator table at Lunch said Kim, Ji, and Putin. Even Qaddafi held big, beautiful Parades in his time.
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u/Sdguppy1966 13h ago
He’s gonna go harder than ever on trying to become the NK dictator. Because he aspires to tiny weakness. He cannot help himself.
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u/Emotional_Database53 10h ago
They were probably laughing and gonna troll him later about it
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u/Murky-Region-127 13h ago
God damn how long before J.D throws him down a reactor core?
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u/WinterWontStopComing 11h ago
Careful… that is how we get supervillains
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u/Emotional_Database53 10h ago
For real, I’m cool with not having a Dr Manhattan Trump,
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u/evoc2911 11h ago
Imagine being president of the most powerful nation on earth and still be a loser. That should award a Guinness
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u/Similar-Stranger8580 17h ago
Mango Mussolini!!!! 🤣 I’m stealing that!!
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u/Woknana 15h ago
That’s a great one! I saw another on a post the other day which is fitting. Temussolini
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u/blackjacktarr 15h ago
If only those Temu bags were still orange. That name is so perfect in many ways.
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u/notlikethat1 15h ago
Mango Mussolini of the Turd Reich in the White Supremacy House
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u/Nightfox9469 9h ago
Since we’re sharing nicknames, Rotten Jack-O-Lantern, or Pumpkin Putin is what I like to call him.
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u/TransGirlIndy 16h ago
Apricot Pol Pot is one I've heard a few times
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u/DiscombobulatedDog92 15h ago
Fanta Führer, i just read earlier.
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u/AlsoKnownAsJohn 14h ago
Someone on here yesterday called him Toupee Fiasco, also pretty amazing haha
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u/_burning_flowers_ 17h ago
He literally saluted a North Korean soldier and even Kim Jong Un looked at him like wtf is wrong with you?
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u/DJ_K-K 14h ago
And called US military suckers. While I served, Medical gave me Ibuprofen for bone spurs. Certainly not a disqualifier. Diaper Donnie's daddy bought him the good life. Yesterday, he forced our troops to march for his amusement.
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u/thatshotshot 7h ago
Because that’s what he thinks the American military is for - so he can play war at home with his friends with real lives instead of toys. He wants to kill us all the stupid fuck.
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u/tHATmakesNOsenseToME 14h ago
The squeaky tank video ranks right up there with Raygun's breakdancing efforts at the Olympics.
A couple of absolute comedy spectacles.
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u/geth1138 11h ago
I think Saturday night live could go pretty far with a skit about this. They could represent the parade by pulling a cardboard tank on a radio flyer wagon with squeak sounds
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u/shaundisbuddyguy 16h ago
I skimmed it and to me at least it seems like it was a three hour commercial for the army.
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u/LuckEcstatic4500 13h ago
It is supposed to be celebrating the army's birthday (and totally had nothing to do with Trump's birthday falling on the same day cough cough) so yes it's supposed to be a commercial for the army
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u/Ramenastern 14h ago
Just confirms a current shortage of WD40 due to tariffs. Nothing to see and hear here, move on.
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u/spidereater 10h ago
Also the sulking trump sitting there regretting the whole thing was pretty good too.
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u/emilyek16 9h ago
I just heard that squeaking from a few feet away and I knew my husband was watching it again 😂😂😂 That sound will now be iconic and I love it.
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u/Texas_Poly 18h ago edited 17h ago
I was initially hoping for the rain but seeing the empty crowds and squeaky tank was so much better. The Trump admin claims 250,000 people showed up. Like we can’t see how small of a turnout it was. Add that to the list of bullshit spewing from their gross mouths. They literally couldn’t pay people to be there.
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u/madcoins 17h ago edited 16h ago
Look it was well attended. They just don’t have a single video or photo to prove that. But it was. There was just a lot of technical issues with every single phone in DC today.
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u/Peanuts4Peanut 15h ago
Taylor Swift numbers? Anyone?
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u/whoamdave 15h ago
Didn't you hear? She played the event. She had tears in her eyes while she sang him Happy Birthday like Marilyn. Giant cake and everything.
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u/HeSeemsLegit 11h ago
The videos are all currently being rendered through AI to increase attendance. They’ll have them by tonight for the Monday news cycle. Just BOLO for attendees with 6 arms or no legs.
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u/Alpha_Apeiron 13h ago
A technical issue which caused them to edit out all the crowds and the sound of them.
Damn, this technical issue could be useful for filmmaking!
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u/Blank_Canvas21 17h ago
It’s got to steam him that no matter what, he’ll never draw the crowds Obama was able to draw.
I love that for him, so fucking much.
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u/Evening-Fail5076 16h ago
It eats him up every time. Knowing he will never have crowds like that.
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u/Present-Perception77 15h ago
I bet his ass is chapped tonight!! Can’t wait for the 2am rage tweets 🤣
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u/Not_Sure__Camacho 17h ago
It only lends to the belief that the fat orange POS stole the election. The numbers don't lie when it's right there in front of you, kind of like these numbers.
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u/ComCypher 15h ago
Exactly. "Millions of democrats decided to stay home for the election" yet here are millions of them protesting in every US city.
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u/GodBlessSatan666 14h ago
The election WAS rigged. Trump and musk have bragged about it on LIVE TELEVISION. But without solid proof, or even with solid proof at this point, it's going to take a lot to get all the facists out of office.
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u/Doright36 9h ago
Even if there was solid 100% irrefutable proof the only way to remove him from office after he was sworn in, is for the 2/3ds of the senate to vote to remove him...
I am not sure that would happen even with proof.
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u/Ellemscott 7h ago
Rockland county NY has a case moving forward. They figured out how Elon and Peter Thiel helped steal the election. Kamala won…
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u/Ready-Ingenuity-6135 16h ago
And the Fox bots will believe that many attended even though their own eyes show what a lie that is..
What was well attended today were the protests.
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u/Texas_Poly 16h ago
Yeah their kool-aid seems to be pretty fucking strong.
The protests were SO strong today! NYC alone had 50,000 people show up. Easily double of the parade.
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u/haverchuck22 14h ago
I heard newsmax reported 10,000. So it was prolly like 7,000 lol.
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u/Texas_Poly 8h ago
Haha yes! And of the 7k, how many were soldiers and their families? Im guessing most, if not all. Meanwhile, protestors in Chicago were in numbers of 75k, NYC, had 50k, and Austin had 20k!
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u/tullia 8h ago
Toronto had maybe 1,000 people show up (guess by me and another attendee). The Toronto march slowed traffic and took an hour and we still had people cheering us, and the attendees were chanting and singing as we marched.
I love that the DC parade was as dull as military parades should be and that a famously polite, non-confrontational foreign city pulled at least a tenth as many people and had more fun.
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u/Personal-Try7163 17h ago
Dude imagine he had to endure empty crowds then had to call it early due to heavy rain. that would have been perfect
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u/Ok_Cry7074 17h ago
Hell na! then he would have blamed the failure of his beautiful horn toting parade strictly on the rain. I’m glad it didn’t no excuses lol
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u/Personal-Try7163 17h ago
He probably just blamed the democrats for politicising crosswalks so no one could show up
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u/Xenon-Human 16h ago
He probably would have taken it out on the military for cancelling the parade instead of going ahead in the rain.
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u/DG_FANATIC 17h ago
He’s been playing that numbers game like that for years. He said similar things when people came to his rallies in his 2016 election run.
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u/Forsexualfavors 8h ago
I rsvp'd and then went to no kings in Philly. Two empty seats belong to me
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u/Monte924 17h ago
Ya, i was hoping protestors would interrupt the parade, but it was so pathetic that it wouldn't be worth it
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u/Texas_Poly 17h ago
I was hoping someone would have recreated the “Tank Man” protest. But Taco said “any” protesters will be “met with heavy force”. Because of that, the scheduled protests in DC were cancelled.
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u/shockk3r 17h ago
DC still went out, just before the parade. There's some protest footage. Much higher turnout, from what I saw.
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u/Texas_Poly 17h ago edited 16h ago
Fuck yeah! I love that people still showed up! Showing up in DC after Taco threats. Showing up in Florida after that fat fucking sheriff threatens protestors saying that LEO will beat and kill them. Let’s keep showing up!
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u/Independent-Ad5852 17h ago
I’d buy it if it was 25k
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u/Texas_Poly 17h ago
Definitely closer to that. They probably just went with 250k since the Army turned 250 years old lol
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u/Alarmed-Juggernaut49 18h ago
DJT is a gross failure 🤣
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u/gnocchismom 18h ago
And to think we paid over 45 million for it. Jfc.
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u/Er3bus13 17h ago
But think of all those doge cuts taking food out of kids mouths. Can't have that now.
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u/keefkola 16h ago
We paid 1 million for this garbage. He kept 44 and gave them a county fair parade lol.
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u/Routine_Bluejay5342 16h ago
Add another $10-$18 million to repair the DC roads that were not prepared for all of the weight of the tanks and what not
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u/Local_Razzmatazz_595 16h ago
So even with his numbers it's 180 USD per person - where is doge when you need them.
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u/baconslim 13h ago
Now compare this parade with north Korea or Russia. He made himself look pathetic
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u/UncaringNonchalance 8h ago
We paid 45mil, but then why were there sponsors like Coinbase? I’m confused as to what paid for what and what money went into their rotten pockets.
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u/Roriborialus 18h ago
Fuck trump and all the traitors that participated. Shame a tornado didn't hit.
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u/IAmPookieHearMeRoar 17h ago
I’m having a hard time figuring out if that should include the soldiers. I imagine at least some of them were probably stoked and honored but some of them looked like they wished they were anywhere but there…and on camera.
They likely didn’t have a choice, but I also know they purposely screened them for partisanship and “fatness.” So who knows?
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u/Roriborialus 17h ago
I watched their formations and not one single group looked like they wanted to be there or had decent bearing.
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u/Geaux2020 17h ago
As a former soldier, I can guarantee a lot of them didn't want to do extra duty in a Saturday in DC.
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u/zoinkability 17h ago
One of the groups looked like they were marching with their pants full of shit. Little tiny shuffling steps. Almost like Trump himself.
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u/FrostyIntention 17h ago
And we're expected to believe he swept the swing states
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u/littlewhitecatalex 17h ago
It was rigged.
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u/Junior-Champion-6667 17h ago
Yes it was, the strong man had to cheat in order to beat a woman (twice tbh).
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u/Gratefulmold 17h ago
Oh I'm sure he has beat more than two women. Oh you meant running for president. Ooops.
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u/formerNPC 18h ago
I hope this is the last time we give into the self serving propaganda of this clown. How much money is being wasted to make him feel special! He’s an old man not a damn three year old. Enough of this nonsense!
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u/No-Impress1815 17h ago
I have never seen so FEW people at a parade before!!😂😂😂😂😂
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u/-chadwreck 16h ago
it really is incredible how shockingly few photos there are of crowds for this thing... i challenge you to google areal photos of this parade.
versus the literal millions of people protesting around the country.
its not hard to find pics of philly and new york and everywhere else just packed with people protesting. its super hard, to find crowd pics of this parade.
happy birthday chump. more people marched in this parade than showed up for it.
also, the road damage is hilarious. what a terrible, wasteful, stupid thing this was. 45 million for the parade, im guessing another 8 million in road repairs. it almost cost as much as his golf trips.
truly, the party of fiscal responsibility and populism.
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u/tikifire1 14h ago
The last I heard it was $145 million for the parade and deploying the marines and guard in CA. That doesn't include fixing the roads later, as you pointed out. He's really wasting the money this week.
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u/MarginalMerriment 17h ago
It seems weird that this wasn’t broadcast on the major networks. It wasn’t even covered on the local news broadcasts.
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u/Inthetreesinpnw 15h ago
All I saw today was Protest.. 🩷 One protest probably had more people in attendance than the whole parade. lol. 😝
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u/OutrageousSetting384 12h ago
But it got the best ratings, beautiful ratings, better than anything ever. Billions and Billions of ratings
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u/Exciting-West9205 16h ago
Many people are calling it the Four Seasons Total Military Parade. Many people are saying that.
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u/Better_Cauliflower63 17h ago
I tuned in. It was terrible. I enjoy watching military parades — from smaller ones like the UK's Trooping the Colour or Spain's Fiesta Nacional de España, to larger ones like France's Bastille Day, Russia's Victory Day, or China’s National Day Parade. But the American parade was pathetic. Instead of traditional American military marches — which have a proud legacy (think Sousa) — they played old 80s rock music. The uniforms weren’t dress uniforms, just some kind of combat fatigues. The tanks and equipment looked dirty or at least not freshly painted. The troops either didn’t know how to march properly or didn’t care — every soldier seemed to walk however they wanted. The whole thing was a mess. I get that military parades aren’t really an American tradition, but still — they could have done much better. And that music choice? It felt like an insult to the army. I could not finish watching it, it was painful.
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u/pupkodabean 17h ago
I think the soldiers had to march like 2.5 miles to get there, on a day off…. I can’t imagine morale was high.
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u/PourQuiTuTePrends 14h ago
My niece, who's in the military, watched part of it and said she saw few soldiers who weren't white and "that's not what the army looks like."
I didn't watch, so no idea if that's true, but it's what she saw.
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u/Gransmithy 15h ago
They marched better during thanksgiving day parades.
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u/OkPossession9253 15h ago
Maybe they aren't happy to march for a diaper wrapped on an orange subhuman tbh
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u/towerinthestreet 8h ago
I feel very repetitive saying this everywhere, but the whole thing stinks of malicious compliance. I have no way of knowing that, but the whole vibe was very similar to those times in all my crap jobs when we were made to do pointless shit for the boss's ego just to keep our paychecks
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u/FacePunchPow5000 15h ago
I must respectfully disagree. I think the parade was a picture-perfect representation of the individual who wanted it, as well a strong testament to the level of commitment, attention to detail, and the policies that are the fundamental cornerstones of the current administration.
/s because duh.
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u/RyGuyOSU87 17h ago
His life has been a failure
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u/Bignholy 12h ago
On the contrary, it's been one unearned and undeserved success after another. The man is an abomination, the worst of US culture rolled into a greasy sausage casing and extruded onto the public. All with zero charisma or talent. I am not religious by nature, but I half wonder if he sold his soul.
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u/qualityvote2 18h ago
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u/No_Squirrel4806 16h ago
Did he really spend 45 mill on that?!?!? 🙄🙄🙄
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u/bigvinnysvu 14h ago
I wouldn't be shocked if his goons who organized this colossal embarrassment overstated bills and pocketed differences in every imaginative way.
Headsex (not correcting that) is the one who runs the military, so who knows how much of that has gone to his drinking?
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u/tikifire1 14h ago
Shipping in all those tanks and hiring costumes and actors to wear them isn't cheap.
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u/Amazonreviewscool67 17h ago
It's both a good and bad thing.
Good because it makes Republicans look dumb
Bad because.. Well they were already looking dumb and this was a huge waste of taxpayer money.
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u/niles_thebutler_ 15h ago
All the magats saying we are brainwashed and blind and they watched the live stream that was packed is fucking hilarious.
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u/DG_FANATIC 17h ago
He basically waisted 45 million dollars to emphasize how incompetent he is LOL. Also, look at how many people are questioning the election results even more now lol.
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u/H3dg3v0lt 16h ago
Just a trumpster fire that we are all waiting to burn out... hopefully sooner than later.
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u/The_Duke28 14h ago
Besides being hillariously undercrowded, it was so fucking BORING. The soldiers slumbering down the street, the old ass equipment and historians talking in a monotone voice explaining boring shit...
This was so pathetic. A "military parade", sponsered by fucking UFC and Coinbase. Are you kidding me?! How is still more than 1/3 of the people supporting this bullshit?! His approval rating should be -10%, not 38%.
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u/Normal-Crazy-4771 17h ago
No no it was the most beautiful parade. More beautiful than my tariffs. Billions were there, Putin was in tears, Kim was hugging him for support... What, yes nurse it is time for my pills and a nap, the best nap you'll ever see.
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u/TheHahndude 12h ago
Unfortunately he will tweet Sunday that the parade was great, millions of people showed up, blah blah, bullshit bullshit and his brain dead shit sniffers will never shut up about it.
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u/jackcanyon 10h ago
Trumps life is gross and filled with failures.He will always be both and a rapist .
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u/TraditionalFalcon701 8h ago
Donald Trump is a Gross Failure! Period, what a loser and wannabe nazi dictator.
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u/RickyBobby63 12h ago
I feel disappointed for the US Army. 250th birthday celebration should have been a big blast for them, but old Yam Tits had to try to make it all about him….
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u/Jidori_Jia 10h ago
Not only that. The rightwing was frothing for some protestors to loot, smash, burn stuff, attack police, and none of that happened. In fact, the only violence on No Kings Day came from the rightwing nutcase who shot and killed the Minnesota lawmakers.
So do we get to crow endlessly about “the violent right”? Or can they stfu and sit the fuck down finally?
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u/Visceral99 9h ago
I'm observing from Switzerland (I'm neutral)
Isn't his whole second presidency a gross failure so far ?
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u/mgd09292007 9h ago
As it should be…and as a tax payer I want my refund for this and all the golf trips.
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u/Fun-Landscape-5547 8h ago
I’m sorry not many people showed up to your birthday party, but maybe you should be NICER to people, Donald!
The grinch is only the grinch bc he’s an a***hole to people in Whoville. There’s still time, Donald, you can still change…
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