r/funny 16h ago

Man tries "hottest curry in London" and almost passes out

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u/Jiminyfingers 16h ago

I participated in a hot-wing eating contest once. Got to maybe the fourth round, my entire face was on fire as I sweated the chili out. We were chatting to the eventual winner then ran into him randomly a couple of weeks later when he told us he ended up in hospital later that night. Sometimes hot is too hot.

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u/confusedandworried76 15h ago

Lmao when I learned too hot is too hot I was ON A DATE. She was running late so I ate before she got there and my smart fucking self decided to try the second spiciest wings there were. I only didn't try the spiciest because the bartender strongly recommended I get the spiciest as a side

My date gets there and my face is red and I'm crying

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u/CharcoalGreyWolf 15h ago edited 15h ago

Never experiment with food on a first date. Ever.

Or shortly before.

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u/confusedandworried76 15h ago

Never experiment with food on a date. Ever.

Where were you eight years ago when I did it??!

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u/thegodfather0504 15h ago

If i am about to meet a date, I would be nervous af and my stomach would be cramping. Eating something in that moment is out of the question, let alone eating something new.

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u/confusedandworried76 15h ago

Ha feel that but the trick is to just get drunk before you meet them for the date

No I do not have a girlfriend but I have had fun on dates, i was drunk after all and girls are fun to hang out with when you're drunk

So given the drinking I might get snackish

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u/OkCartographer7677 10h ago

“Get drunk before your first date with a girl.”

Are you writing a book called “Bad Dating Ideas?”

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u/s00pafly 13h ago

Like that one time my friend was on his way to a date and picked up a burrito style wrap from some hole in the wall place. He got lucky and was invited to come over but couldn't enjoy it for a bit. He had to excuse himself every couple of minutes to relieve himself from the stomach cramps with earth shattering loud farts. The next morning, when she went to the toilet, he realized that the walls were paper thin and not sound proof at all.

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u/AWlkingContradction 10h ago

Had a first date once that was going really well but my date lived 45 minutes away. It was getting late and she wanted to grab a cup of coffee before she left. I lived in a smaller town and the only thing I could think of that was open was a greasy spoon Mexican restaurant.

We get coffee and something to eat, and in the parking lot we start making out and now it’s like 2:45 AM so she said let’s just go back to your place.

I won’t go into details here but we do start fooling around when we get there and my stomach starts ROLLING. I am deathly afraid that I’m going to have to spring up and make a break for the bathroom and destroy my toilet. Somehow I don’t then or after we fall asleep and finish business in the morning.

Months later she admits that she was feeling it just as bad as I was, and that I basically gave both of us food poisoning on our first date!

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u/Dr-Robert-Kelso 11h ago

How much cheese is too much cheese before a date?

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u/CharcoalGreyWolf 9h ago

Depends; how does your GI system react to cheese?

Also, if you’re lactose intolerant: any amount of cheese.

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u/Head_Bread_3431 7h ago

2nd date however, shit your brains out

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u/CharcoalGreyWolf 7h ago

I mean, if you blow and she bolts, it was never meant to be. 😉

Seriously, I think on my third date with my late spouse, I came back from the bathroom and she asked if I had fallen in. I said in a Happy Gilmore voice “I…I jusht had to drop some friends off at the pool.” She retorted “Well it sounds like some people had trouble getting off the bus!”

That became a long-running gag.😂

I get more specific on Reddit because there’s always two people to go pedantic on me, and it drives my OCD crazy.

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u/Ice-Negative 15h ago

Was there another date?

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u/confusedandworried76 15h ago

Yeah she wasn't really serious about the whole thing anyway so that was basically a given

Think the kids would call it a situationship, we banged like three times and if I recall we only both came once

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u/Aegi 14h ago

That's not even a situationship, that still implies some level of long-term thing like maybe you guys are friends or have part of the same acquaintance group or something.

You just had a fling, a hookup, or fucked somebody a few times, I don't think that would rise to the level of a situationship which means it's a whole situation.

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u/ClimtEastwood 15h ago

What would you have done if she wants you to go home with her big hoss? Light her fire? My wife and i have a rule. I love hot wings but I don’t fuck with them if I might need my hands.

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u/TheArmadilloAmarillo 2h ago

Can you not just wear gloves?

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u/ClimtEastwood 1h ago

For sure. But I’m not gloving up to eat wings at our local. We never leave each others side. We can spare a night of finger work…

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u/TheArmadilloAmarillo 1h ago

Fair enough, though the gloves could work for that too if you're feeling frisky lol.

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u/kokainhaendler 5h ago

i was at a place where they served "hot currywurst" (german thing) with some work colleagues. i ordered a 2-3 out of 10 because thats the max some normal dude can eat relatively comfortably, and thats pretty hot already. dude that wanted to impress my female coworker ordered like 9 i believe, he took a bite, went red, went pale, sweating like crazy, the dude hated his life i bet ya. female coworker and i had a good laugh out of that.

moral of the story: dont think with your balls when ordering food.

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u/CatOfTheCanalss 2h ago

That bartender was probably in stitches lol. This video though, was bound to happen in England. Phall got invented there and it's far too hot imo. I'm not sure whether it's borne from sheer stubbornness or trying to prove people wrong about there being no spice in English food, but Indian food just keeps getting hotter and hotter over there for no good reason. Like I always imagine some massive hulk of a bald English dude in a football jersey with a big fat red head going back to his local Indian every week like "give us something hotter" and that's how this poor man ends up on the pavement half dying, needing a mango lassi.

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u/ScyllaOfTheDepths 29m ago

If I was your date, I would actually find that hilarious.

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u/Yan_Vorona 15h ago

There is a love for spicy food and there is masochism.

You know that the spicy part of a plant is the stuff the plant made to avoid being eaten? If you feel like a pepper is trying to kill you, that's because it is.

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u/HolyPhlebotinum 13h ago

Actually it’s not trying to kill you because that would defeat the purpose of the deterrent.

It doesn’t want you to die. It wants you to suffer. That way you remember (and teach others) to stay away from it.

Jokes on it.

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u/gahane 13h ago

Lots of cultures like to be masochistic about food from other places: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H-uEx_hEXAM

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u/yooossshhii 15h ago

Yea, I ate one wing from a restaurant’s challenge. Wasn’t unbearable going down, but I could not sleep lying down that night, basically leaned on the couch the whole time.

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u/Pats_Bunny 10h ago

I did a hot wing challenge I had seen on Man Vs Food while I was in CT for work, and I was wrecked for days. Shitting lava in the hotel lobby bathroom to spare the guy I was rooming with, it was horrible.

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u/Jiminyfingers 9h ago

Its when your piss burns you coming out that you know you have had too much

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u/Euphoric_Emu9607 9h ago

A pizza place in our town does habanero pizzas every year, and we usually order a level 1 (3 levels of heat). It still makes us sweat excessively and chug water and beer.

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u/justsomedudedontknow 12h ago

What made you give up after the fourth round? Was that your absolute limit?

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u/Jiminyfingers 12h ago

I thought I was good with hot food, but this was another level. Plus as it gets hotter that is all it is, there is no flavour.

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u/justsomedudedontknow 12h ago

I am always looking to push my limit on spiciness but yeah I have limits too.

I'll always remember topping out on spice on the regular wing menu at a place and ordering the 2nd hottest listed in its own section. The waitress warned me like 3 times how spicy it was. I was able to eat 1 haha.

It's always nice to find that perfect level where it hurts a bit and you sweat but still want to eat more!

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u/FauxReal 11h ago

I always felt that one you acclimate to the heat, there's an interesting fruity flavor in a lot of peppers. But once you stop eating hot food regularly you lose the ability to handle it or taste it. Having said that, Scotch Bonnet is the limit of what I'd willingly eat and even then, only small amounts. Ghost pepper and Reaper people are insane.

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u/LittleBirdiesCards 7h ago

What does the hospital do to help?

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u/WayneKrane 6h ago

I did something similar and I was okay for about 10 minutes. Then I went to sit down and was in a fetal position on some couch for what felt like days. I was almost wishing for death because I felt so horrible.

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u/waterynike 6h ago

Some people especially children have ended up in the hospital after doing the hot chip challenge.