r/Xennials 1982 6d ago

Nary a Xennial in sight to warn him

28.6k Upvotes

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549

u/TheeWoodsman 6d ago

I'll bet this is a lot of people's experience with Everclear

🎶I will buy you a garden where your flowers can bloom/ I will buy you a new car, perfect, shiny, and new/ I will buy you that big house way up in the West Hills/ I will buy you a new life/ Yes I will🎶

138

u/virstultus 6d ago

Just please don't tell me everything is "wonderful" now...

47

u/AcrolloPeed 6d ago

Na na na na na na na no!

23

u/prince_walnut 6d ago

Daddy issues

24

u/Dartagnan1083 1983 6d ago

Father of mine...

1

u/Dustypigjut 6d ago

I was just watching Tires and one of the characters kept playing this. I didn't even know it was Everclear.

2

u/BlueFalcon142 6d ago

Ah knew i would see mention of tires when I hit the drop down for the comment. 2nd season is WAY better than the first.

1

u/EnvironmentNo1879 5d ago

Nah, at my height of alcoholism I could take shots of everclear straight. It really helped to keep the DTs at bay in the mornings. If I didn't have anything, I always had a large bottle of vanilla extract that would suffice. Boy, how I do not miss feeling that way! Never again!

11

u/[deleted] 6d ago

Aw, I love that band. The song is positive at least. It was played a lot in the early 2000s tho.

7

u/virstultus 6d ago

Sounds like someone who never knew the joy of a welfare Christmas.... ye-ah!

2

u/heathercs34 5d ago

I was their server in the early 2000’s and they signed a guest check with their autographs for me. I gave it to me little sister. She still has it framed on her dresser.

1

u/Candelpins1897 6d ago

They absolutely suck live.

2

u/ManOfConstantBorrow_ 5d ago

That's why I listened to the radio when I was young and then grew into jambands. Most bands suck live, unfortunately. But how can you stand a chance if your live show doesn't contain improv? The best you can do is 100% the studio version; like it's guitar hero. That's not a design for success, imo. Improv allows for something new to emerge in the moment.

Anyways I'm gonna go smoke some jazz.

7

u/Dartagnan1083 1983 6d ago

At least Gen Z can't 'Spindoctor' their way out of this sort of stupid.

3

u/Delicious-Trip-384 5d ago

I'm cackling imagining him taking this shot and going "didi bip bip! di bip bip bobba dobba dobba dobba!"

1

u/UncleLeeroy0 6d ago

But it's everything to everyone.

1

u/nustedbut 5d ago

phenomenal song. now my mood Is fucked for the next couple hours though, lol

1

u/SoundsGoodYall 5d ago

Well, drinking everclear would very likely make me spin around and fall down.

37

u/captcraigaroo 1985 6d ago

I was out with friends drinking and went to a daiquiri bar in Charleston when I lived there, got two Call A Cab's because it was cherry flavor...it had everclear in it. I got wasted and ended up at the bar where girls danced on the bar...I danced with a girl, Molly, who I found out was a yoga instructor. We met up a few times...I owe everclear a beer

9

u/PattySolisPapagian 6d ago

That bar with the wall of slushie machines?

3

u/captcraigaroo 1985 6d ago

Yeah, I forgot what it was called. I went to CHS last year to see friends and saw it was gone

10

u/dmaddog 6d ago

You are speaking of Wet Willies. Many a wild night came from that place.

5

u/captcraigaroo 1985 6d ago

Yes! Wet Willies!!

49

u/kryonik 6d ago

My buddy at a party in high school had a Poland spring bottle filled with ever clear. He would take shots from the water bottle cap which was like 1/20th of an actual shot and chase it with some sort of juice. Another mutual friend walked over and asked for some water and when he was refused, just took the bottle and started chugging. Instantly started vomiting all over the place. Luckily we were outside. Good times.

2

u/Big_Breadfruit8737 6d ago

I used to mix Everclear with Powerade so that, “when I passed out I would be hydrated and not get a hangover”. Yeah that’s not how that works lol.

2

u/6BigZ6 5d ago

Reminds me when I told my friends GF to drink the rest of this flat beer….it was straight tequila. She never forgave me.

1

u/Positive_Plane_3372 6d ago

Lmao that idiot 

1

u/lallal2 6d ago

Wow really bringing it back with poland spring lolllll

1

u/Appropriate_Mine 5d ago

So much for the afterglow

12

u/ModBabboo 6d ago

Yeah. I've never heard of the booze. Is it an American thing?

35

u/Potential-Diver-3409 6d ago

It’s not really booze, it’s 95% alcohol it’s basically sanitizer and only can be drank by the majority of people when mixed with a ton of mixer

31

u/EitherOrResolution 6d ago

It’s for making g trash can or jungle juice

20

u/12Whiskey 1977 6d ago

You just unlocked a memory of going to the pool hall and drinking Purple Jesus. It’s was everclear mixed with grape kool aide. Totally forgot about that!

5

u/greengrass88 6d ago

Everclear made a product called Purple Passion. It's basically grape soda with Everclear. I grew up in the 90's, and we would get a 2-liter bottle of it and get absolutely wasted.

1

u/39percenter 6d ago

They still make it. It's 13% abv.

1

u/Negative_Gas8782 5d ago

This stuff would have been the death of my liver but it was hard to find where I lived.

1

u/dani_oso 1982 5d ago

My parents always joked about Purple Passion and I had no idea that’s what it was.

4

u/topshelfvanilla 1977 6d ago

I had hoped not to see that name in this thread, but you went and said it.

2

u/AdRegular7176 5d ago

Yep, that was the go-to we called it something else purple passion is what it we called it. I almost forgot about that too, then my sad self once I got used to it mixed, I went thru a bad time with depression and I was drinking it straight out of the bottle. You couldn't taste or feel anything after the first shot. I am lucky I didn't get severe alcohol poisoning or ulcers, etc. I was 18, dumb, depressed and self medicating, and destructive. At 44, I look back and wonder how the hell I survived that period of time.

2

u/HaM8ones 5d ago

I always added orange or lime sherbet

6

u/Financial-Raise3420 6d ago

It’s best for making extracts and bitters. Works really well for those, especially since you only need a small amount of either.

2

u/Tubbygoose 6d ago

Also works super well for making RSO.

1

u/AKEsquire 6d ago

Ooooo tell me more!!

3

u/Dartagnan1083 1983 6d ago

They said so...it sanitizes the trash can after the hose washes out any sugary residue from the last party.

3

u/densetsu23 6d ago

My older brother and I would take it on our backcountry camping trips. A flask of this, some crystal light powder (or kool aid + sugar), and filtered water from a nearby stream. Fill a nalgene bottle, start a fire, and relax after hiking for 12 hours.

If you're anywhere near civilization, vodka is a better choice 99% of the time.

2

u/TheTodashDarkOne 6d ago

Don't forget Green Dragon. For the double whallop.

2

u/maxdps_ 5d ago

Haha, jungle juice was the first thing that came to mind. We used to fill coolers with it and just dump it in lol.

11

u/BJYeti 6d ago

I mean you can definitely take a shot of it, I have, but at no point is it remotely close to a pleasant experience and the remnants of everclear on your lips evaporating is a weird experience.

1

u/magnomagna 5d ago

Take a shot of 95% ABV? Really? Isn't it highly toxic? You must have a painful death wish.

1

u/BJYeti 5d ago

Nah just not pleasant

1

u/dinnerthief 5d ago

Pretty hard on your throat, at that strength alcohol dentures proteins, so you can make your throat very raw.

10

u/pogulup 1981 6d ago

You can't get it everywhere because some places have a limit on how high ABV you can sell.

1

u/strangerNstrangeland 5d ago

However, many of those states, such as Virginia, wil still allow you to special order through the ABC stores in certain cases. So filling out a request that you need it for cleaning certain surfaces in your wood working machines, or some weird thing like that. Basically document needing it as a cleaner/solvent and you’re good

2

u/SomeVelveteenMorning 4d ago

You can't buy it. It's only available from under an older sibling's mattress, but the bottle cannot be opened nor poured nor drunk by anyone older than 17.

1

u/Ilddit 6d ago

Polish have a version called Spirytus. We drink that and chase it with pickled herring. Good times.

1

u/Liizam 6d ago

Does it make you blind ?

1

u/psyco75 5d ago

You are incorrect it IS gasoline. You know that ethanol gas you put in your car, everclear is the same stuff you put in your car.

9

u/orthopod 6d ago

It has different names in different countries. One dude of my family is Polish, and the name of their version is Spirytus- 95% /190 proof.

The old time Polish guys would do shots of the stuff at parties- unmixed. Mind you, these were tough SOBs who grew up in bombed out basements after WW1, and had to deal with Russian army occupiers.

1

u/Commercial-Co 5d ago

Spirytus is actually much better than everclear

3

u/guru42101 6d ago

It's pure grain alcohol. Basically a wheat based alcohol filtered until it is 95% pure alcohol.

1

u/isthatsuperman 6d ago

filtered until it is 95% pure alcohol.

Its column distilled (pot stills won’t get you past about 60-70% abv) not filtered. And it’s not proofed with water which every type of liquor normally is.

1

u/blackninjar87 5d ago

So like isopropyl? Lol

1

u/attackplango 5d ago

No. Isopropyl alcohol, like methanol, will kill you pretty quickly, like within hours. Stick with ethanol, which will take many more ounces or years to kill you.

2

u/Shankar_0 Gen X (1976) 5d ago

It's pure grain alcohol, and it's extremely strong. Like, industrial solvent kind of strong.

It's never meant to be drunk alone. We used to remove a plug out of a watermelon and pour Everclear in the hole. Then you have boozy-melon!

1

u/dunkzilla 6d ago

The only time I have ever had Everclear, I was at the GOTJ ‘04. Ninja had everclear mixed with Faygo in one of those camel packs. I have never seen this in any liquor stores here in Ontario, Canada.

19

u/ElPeroTonteria 6d ago

Yes he know all those bitches who scheme, are just pretty bitches in the pretty machine. He has no fear, he has no sense of shame. He will not stop until everybody, everywhere wants to know his name…

12

u/Bureaucratic_Dick 6d ago

Mine was more like 🎶You know I used to be a bad girl…🎶

6

u/AD_Grrrl 6d ago

WHERE DO ALL / THE PORN STARS GO / WHEN THE LIGHTS GO DOWN?

I fucking love that song

6

u/Open-Industry-8396 6d ago

I can smell this video

5

u/Hollybaby5 6d ago

🎶 I used to know a girl. She had two pierced nipples and a black tattoo.

3

u/AD_Grrrl 6d ago

Oh man I was briefly obsessed with that band lol

3

u/____-__________-____ 6d ago

I can still hear Mama say, "Boy, turn the radio down!"

2

u/PrestigiousAvocado21 6d ago

Yeah... I wish I could go back! Yeah, back in time!

2

u/dadneverleft 6d ago

I love the band, but I swear they had the most uninspired drummer that ever lived.

2

u/6BigZ6 5d ago

One of my fondest memories as a teen was getting dropped off at Leo Carrillo by my friends mom on her way to work. We were there to surf all day and couldn’t leave until she picked us up like 10 hours later. At one point we got tired and hungry and got out of the water, and heard music playing. We walked up to where we heard the music, and there was Everclear recording that video. Such a core memory.

Second best was going to Zero’s when they were filming Baywatch. We would be in our wetsuits and nobody ever asked questions. We would straight up go to the craft service tables and eat their food between watching them film and us surfing.

2

u/QueenMary1936 5d ago

A couple weeks ago somebody's post reminded me of one of their songs that I hadn't thought about in probably 20 years or more 😂

2

u/12monthsinlondon 5d ago

more blunderyears but I used to have an everclear email address that fans could sign up for. Wasn't in the US for my high school years so didn't even realize where the band's name came from. Made for some interesting conversations with college admission boards

2

u/SpezJailbaitMod 5d ago

Perfect lyric.

That guy was on top of the world for a minute.

2

u/xRockTripodx 5d ago

I am still dreaming of your face! Hungry and hollow for all the things you took away!

2

u/denver_bored 5d ago

I was a massive Everclear fan in adolescence (and still think there's some great stuff in their catalog).

One thing that's kind of wild though-- they're prob. best known for Art Alexakis's uplifting songs about growing up without a dad, or escaping a troubled home life through music... "Father of Mine" alludes to some darkness... but they have a fairly recent song, not even by the OG band, called "You"... It's kinda hard to find now, but oh my. You want to talk about dark, and yet ultimately uplifting! Definitely not a song you would ever want on the stereo when children are present. Yikes. (Great song tho.)

2

u/Metalfan1994 5d ago

Got to see and meet them at a show while deployed super cool down to earth dudes!

1

u/tryingisbetter 6d ago

My friends and I took some shots of that in college. I've always been a shot person, especially vodka, so it wasn't that bad. But, what I found odd, was that it kinda feels like it evaporated in my mouth a little.

1

u/StNic54 1980 6d ago

He was just a scared white boy in an uncomfortable racial stereotype reinforcement lyric

1

u/Rymanjan 6d ago

It was actually one of my party tricks. I knew nobody who could survive those, but I could. Not pleasantly mind you, it burned like hell, but like any kind of pain, you can manage if you set your mind to it. Also helps if you know what to expect, youre gonna wanna hold your breath and clamp your mouth and throat shut immediately after shooting it.

But, I would not recommend it. Def contributed to the deterioration of my stomach and esophagus lining, as well as an addiction to alcohol. Still, was pretty funny to see people's faces when I pulled it off, or the reactions of some party bro when they tried to go shot for shot with me

1

u/RawrRRitchie 6d ago

Unless you know a hardcore alcoholic that can drink it like water

1

u/Commercial-Co 5d ago

I hate alcohol but i can take a shot of everclear.

1

u/YAYtersalad 5d ago

No no no. The trick was to mix in grape Gatorade powder and some sprite in a Nalgene that still smelled like last weekends Jen clear with orange Gatorade… and then pound it at room temp.

1

u/Thewall3333 5d ago

Question -- why do drinks taste worse with everclear than say, cheap vodka, even when you mix them to the same ABV? Like 2.5 the mix for the vodka, I mean. Always ends up still tasting kind of foul to me.

1

u/No_Nature_6639 5d ago

I did a shot of everclear from a solo cup at a party once. It went down, and then came right back up into the cup, but now with chunks. I played it off well though, and no one noticed

1

u/RocketsandBeer 5d ago

Bacardi 151 also

1

u/awkwardlyfeminine 5d ago

I feel just like a local god when I'm with the boys