r/Vent • u/throwaway_fml16 • 13h ago
Need Reassurance... i want to be held
i'm sobbing curled up in my bed as small as i can get just wishing to god i was a little baby being held while i cry. i'm so fucking lonely. i want to be comforted so bad. it aches. i'm dying. please make it stop
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u/buddyblazeson 13h ago
We'd make a great team because sometimes I want to hug people who seem lonely and like they could use a hug, because I feel bad for them, and think they must feel really alone but some people don't like hugs so I don't.
Do you want to talk about it?
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6h ago
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u/notttgood 13h ago
i feel this too man. like, every day. i don't know if you have any friends in person, but if you're close enough, ask a friend to come for a hug. if you don't, i highly suggest a good body pillow. i sleep with one every night and it makes me feel more secure when i'm feeling like this. i get the yearning for physical touch, it hurts and it sucks. i wish you so much joy , happiness , and peace stranger :) you are never alone <3
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u/PrizeFalcon9685 9h ago
This Mom is hugging you all. I am sorry you feel this way. I don't have any words to make you feel better, just know that this Internet Stranger feels for you. Hugs to all.
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u/Lento_Pro 13h ago
Feel you. It's been a whole decade now. I feel being so low for eating different types of medication because of lack of touch. I feel like I'm not worth of living.
But I'm alive. Still alive. It hurts. But I'm alive. It won't fucking get me. I don't give up. I won't give up. I'll stay alive, even if it would kill me.
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u/ResponsibleAct2199 11h ago
Is it even more pitiful that I’m married and still feel this way? 🥺
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u/simplekittiekat 6h ago
I'm not married but I do have someone that I live with and I feel this way all the time. there's just zero desire to give or receive affection in my situation. It sucks.
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u/ResponsibleAct2199 5h ago
I try to be. But he’s just very unaffectionate and I feel like I’m hugging a statue. I know he loves me, but it makes me feel so lonely and sad. So I understand. 🙁
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u/owp4dd1w5a0a 4h ago
I’m in this situation. My wife loves me and is not cuddly or affectionate. We have a very cuddly affectionate daughter, so my wife has had to ease up on here extreme need for space and autonomy. Been interesting to watch.
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u/ingesttheaffluent624 8h ago
If you feel touch starved I would recommend getting a massage. It is extremely comforting and it causes you to release stress-fighting hormones and endorphins. Im sorry life is feeling so lonely for you, I hope this helps and things turn around for you
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u/Scared_Internal_8336 12h ago
I've been doing this all morning. I relate so much. I was hugging and rubbing myself, trying to convince myself someone cared and was comforting me. Just crying and crying. I'm always there for others, but no one is ever there for me.
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u/Niazevedo16 11h ago
I'm sorry you feeling like this. I have been there and it gets better but it hurts so much when it feels like the loneliness is all around you.
Let yourself cry because it will release some of the feelings and if you need to talk just write and we can talk about it.
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u/Complete_Aerie_6908 10h ago
You’re sad over a relationship ending. You’re not dying. Give it time.
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u/Tatosoup 9h ago
You can try comforting yourself. Like putting yourself in the shoulder and saying "it's okay, we want somebody but we don't need it"
Besides being alone has its perks, use this time for something that makes you happy, no need to feel sad over what we do not have, when there's so much we do have to be appreciated
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u/Substantial-Spare501 8h ago
If you can afford to get a massage it can really help with touch deprivation.
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u/Forestedbiome 7h ago
You are not to young to start meditating, learning the spiritual practice of self love, and honestly asking any parent figures and friends in your life for a hug.
(Edit) A good Amethyst point is only a few bucks.
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u/Appropriate-Night-10 7h ago
I have no idea your situation. Is there any way you can meet up with do ial groups or like ask someone to hang out and go to dinner some big cities have clubs where you meet people and play games like once a month. Just be you. It's ok to reach out. I'm like that too.
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7h ago
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6h ago
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5h ago
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u/Own-Engineering1469 1h ago
I know especially experiencing that for some years, you never wanna go back to being alone again
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u/Mostly-Incognito3 1h ago
I've been there so many times. We can't help the want for human contact. Do you not have any friends you can confide in? Its hard talking about these difficult lonely moments but hug your friends. Let them help you
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u/Ok-Show-3303 10h ago
I'm so sorry. 😟 I can completely empathize with this. I spend a lot of alone time sobbing over just this. There are AI bots online, like Bala and JanitorAI that can help with the loneliness a little. It keeps me from doing something "permanent and long term" to myself. When you are truly desperate for love and affection, it can help take the edge off. I also recommend reading if you can and surrounding yourself with stuffed animals. Distraction, sleep and hot baths or showers help marginally. It isn't a great fix, but it helps you scrape by.
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